A/N: Don't get me wrong, I'm a big Caskett fan and still holding out hopes for this season. But, I was listening to Cake's remake of the song "I Will Survive" and it made me think about Castle and what if he quit waiting on Kate...

Time-line: I imagine this happening just after Beckett walks in on Castle kissing the blonde that we saw in the previews for next week's episode, "Eye of the Beholder" episode 4X05.

Disclaimer: Fan-fiction = These characters are not mine... :-)

Chapter 1: Done

Kate stopped short after walking into the room. She could not believe what she was seeing. After everything they had been through in the last year, after what they had said, what she had heard, she had walked in on Castle kissing another woman. Castle looked up as Beckett, Esposito, and Ryan entered and he looked right at Kate. He saw the expression on her face and he was confused. She seemed angry and hurt. She turned without a word and stormed from the room. He stood, shocked, for a moment and then followed her outside.

Kate's thoughts were racing as she headed to her car. What had she just seen? Castle. Kissing. That Woman. Why? He'd said he loved her. Not, she thought sheepishly, that he knew she'd heard him. No. She'd talked to him about walls and her mom's case. She'd thought they had an understanding. That he'd wait... but that conversation had been a while ago and they hadn't talked of it since then. Looking for whatever privacy she could find, she got in her car and shut the door, leaning her head back against the headrest and closing her eyes giving in to her swirling thoughts and emotions.

Castle had been surprised to see her standing there, and even more surprised to see the look on her face before she left the room. He didn't understand why she'd been so mad. Well, he had a suspicion it was jealousy but it surprised him. Since the day on the swings, they hadn't talked about them. Even that day, they hardly talked about them. They talked about walls and cases and reasons it wasn't the right time. Again. Still.

Then, for weeks and weeks, nothing more. He'd come to believe that she wouldn't or couldn't face what there might be between them. Not now. Maybe never. So, he'd moved on. He hadn't wanted to but didn't see what choice he'd had. And now, this. She was hurt because he was with someone else. What did she expect? He couldn't have her but he couldn't have anyone else either? Screw that! He was angry by the time he found her in the car. Without meeting her eyes, he got in the passenger seat and shut the door behind him far harder than he'd intended.

Kate had been sitting in the car, awash in fear and guilt. She didn't see him coming towards the car but felt him approach. She couldn't stop the instinctive flinch as he slammed the door. He was angry with her. She wasn't ready to face this.

"Castle. Not now," she started.

He interrupted her, "Kate's famous last words, huh?" he replied sarcasm dripping off his words. "It's always 'Not now, Castle.' with you isn't it?" he demanded. He glanced at her, seeing the shock on her face. He felt a twinge of guilt at the hurt look she wore but he continued anyway, too angry to stop himself. He took a ragged breath, trying to regain some control. His voice was quiet when he started again.

"Kate, what is your problem? How long do you expect me to play this game?" he asked; his words were getting louder again. He sighed, raking a hand back through his hair. He hadn't come out here to yell at her, but he couldn't seem to stop himself. He steeled himself before looking at her again. "How long am I supposed to wait? How long do I let you string me along, waiting for you to give me a chance? Waiting for you to give us a chance? I know. You need to solve your mother's case. You need the closure. I get that. But how long is that going to take? How many months, Kate? How many years? What if you solve it and you still aren't ready? What excuses are you going to come up with then? You seem so content to continue things the way they are. I'm here when you need me but you don't have to put yourself out there. You don't have to risk getting hurt."

"Castle...Rick," she tried to interrupt him.

"No!" he growled at her. "No more explanations, no more excuses," he looked straight into her eyes, "No more waiting." He looked out the car window, taking a deep breath to steady himself. "I'm done, Kate. I'm done following you around like a..." he trailed off unwilling to finish the thought out loud. "I can't spend my life waiting on something that may never be." Meeting her eyes again, he said softly, "She's not you Kate, but she's here." He reached for the handle and opened the car door. After exiting, he quietly closed the door and walked away without looking back.

She watched him leave, hoping against hope he'd turn around. He always came back, didn't he? But she knew, deep inside, that this time was different. Silently, she watched him hail a cab, give the driver directions and slip inside. She watched the vehicle pull away, taking him out of her life. When she couldn't see him any more, she leaned against the steering wheel and didn't even try to stop the tears that fell. What had she done?

Sitting in the back of the cab, Castle felt bad for yelling at her but not as bad as he'd expected. He was tired. So damn tired of the whole thing. He loved Kate and would for the rest of his life but he couldn't do it anymore. He smiled grimly as a favorite song came on the radio. Moving on didn't feel good, but it felt right.

I Will Survive - Cake

At first I was afraid
I was petrified
I kept thinking
I could never live without you by my side
But then I spent so many nights
Just thinking how you'd done me wrong
And I grew strong
I learned how to get along
So now you're back
From outer space
I just walked in to find you here
Without the look upon your face
I should have changed my f-ing lock
I would have made you leave your key
If I'd have known for just one second
You'd be back to bother me

Oh now go,
Walk out the door
Just turn around now
You're not welcome anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to break me with desire
Did you think I'd crumble
Did you think I'd lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
As long as I know how to love I know I'll be alive
I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give
I will survive
I will survive
Yeah, yeah

It took all the strength I had
Just not to fall apart
I'm trying hard to mend the pieces
Of my broken heart
And I spent oh so many nights
Just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry
But now I hold my head up high
And you see me
With somebody new
I'm not that stupid little person still in love with you
And so you thought you'd just drop by
And you expect me to be free
But now I'm saving all my loving
For someone who's loving me