The Will of a Goofy Pistol
Patty couldn't understand it.
"Huuumm…" murmured her big sister as she stopped playing with her pen, now placing it near her lips in a deep-in-thought cliché way.
They were at their fancy-ass home, she and her sis, sitting on the long-ass table trying to (unsuccessfully) write a weird-ass will.
"I cannot find any idea," Patty herself chirped as she loosely held the offending paper at her eye-level, examining the untouched striped sheet all once again.
Really. The girl was seriously lost here. Everything was very confusing. Why were Shibusen's big fishes asking them to make a what-do-you-call-it thing? Weren't they just going out for a mission? They have already took dangerous missions before and always come back all well so, why were they making her and her sister write something like that? Ugh!
Patty was seriously considering making that damn piece of paper a big-ass giraffe, just for the fun of crushing its neck, and with that freeing her completely from having to make the will, just like she did with the super exam-thingy.
The finger holding the paper softly twitched in excitement at the idea, until her sister speaking interrupted her planning.
"Even if they told us to write a will because we will take part to the Kishin's purge," rationalized the older Thompson with a pout. "We don't have anyone in particular to which leave our testament."
The young sibling was all but hearing her sister's truthfully words; she was more occupied thinking about the differences between horses, mules, hinnies and donkeys to really pay attention. That girl had really serious issues with her attention spawn.
Liz left the pen beside her paper and whispered. "A will, huh…"
The two Demon Weapons stood on complete silence, each in their own little inner world, dealing with their own little inner problems and worries, until…
"Heck! I really don't know what to do with this!" said angrily Liz as she threw both her arms up to emphasize her point, stressed at the silent mood. She then stood up and replied. "Patty, I'm going off at Maka's to relax from this thing. Feel free to come if you like."
"OK,"
Her dear sister then nodded at her and went out of the dining room.
Patty stood there alone. She was still trying to get the hang out of having to write a will, but just like the last time, she wasn't getting it at all.
She was trying to understand what she had to write for the umpteenth time, but it didn't sound too much different from having to go to the moon, get a hold on the Kishin and go back home before dinner was served. Just as easy as that.
They weren't going to fight Crona or something, so there wasn't so much of a problem. It was only the Kishin against Kid, her sis and she… and half of Shibusen's most prominent forces. Even Mr. Maka's Dad, Professor Stein, Miss Marie and the other funny Death Scythes were going to take part. It was going to be a carnage. A Kisin carnage. She giggled at her own silly joke.
But they still asked them all to write that stupid thing…
After some minutes of fidgeting with the paper some more, and balancing the pen on with her mouth, the younger Thompson took her own pen with a determined grip and started writing in a quick and clumsy way, occasionally crossing a word or two.
"Kyeheheya!" laughed the demon pistol, happy and pleased to have finally gotten an idea about what to write on the sheet.
She scratched some more words on the paper for a few more times until she felt satisfied enough with her answer. "Gotcha, gotcha!" she exclaimed in a victorious pose like the one when she killed her giraffe at the Ultimate Written Exam as she finished writing.
After that, she threw her pen behind her, crumbled her will on a single paper ball, stood up from the chair in a loud way, and left the table with a cheerful smile, eager to follow her sister's decision to go and play with Black Star and the others for a while, while Kid returned home.
As she made her way out of the dinner room, the girl looked back at her crumbled will, made a pout and raised her middle finger at it.
Yep. Definitely, Patty just couldn't understand it at all.
…
(Not too long after)
Death the Kid had just come back from another meeting with the other invading-units. He wore a stressed face as he made his way over the dining room.
With everything that had happened in the last months, what they were being told on the reunions and his own suspicions about things, he was really sure that the invasion was going to be more difficult than how his father and the others were making them believe.
And, the fact that he was playing a major and decisive role on it as his father's representative didn't helped with the psyche of the Shinigami.
The Fragment let out a long sigh, and was ready to call it a day and rest (more like think about the invasion and possible flaws all over and over), until a small cramped paper ball over the table grabbed his attention. "Huh?"
He had unfolded the sheet and was greeted with the horrible child-like calligraphy of his youngest weapon. With curvy lines here, some loops there, lots of erasures all over the paper, and even a drawing at the end. Kid lifted an eyebrow quizzically (to not say with repulsion) at the sight, but started reading the contents silently anyway.
.
.
.
"What in tarnation is this?" said slowly and confused Death the Kid.
Some seconds after finishing his reading, he left Patty's wrinkled testament on the table, besides the blank testament of her other pistol and went over to find the two sisters. With how grumpy Liz had been the last days, he had a good idea were they might be.
If this could really be his last mission, better spend it among his most beloved comrades. With that reasoning, the Shinigami made his way out.
His steps were slow and his mind was still furiously remembering the invasion plan all over again without any sign of stopping, but, this time, there was a small smile on his face.
Patricia Thompson's Testament:
I DON't care if your all WEAK and small and smell BADLY! ain't nobody got time for yer! Kid is awesome and your some MEANIES to make me and my sis and he write this!
WE ALL TRUSST HIM COMPLETELY! he and sis and I have gone to other funny places before with other funny creeps before! this will be EASY, so crawl with yo Mamas while Kid and us kick that stupid Kishin's ass!
P.S.: I dunno know what a "testoreament" is, so I here's me firing a big-ass LAZER from my EYES mounting a happy pony YEAH! that is ridding a rainbow and yells "PUDDING"! aye, aye! :D
Disclaimer: I don't own Soul Eater, their characters or locations; they're the properties of Atsushi Ohkubo. I just took them without permission for entertaining purposes.
Hallo!
Thanks to my good friend 8Crazy8 for suggesting me to write this. I know it's nothing near to what you told me, but hope you like this one as much as I did. ;) Remember that I told you once that I clumsily draw a Giraffe on the back-side of one of my English exams? Well, it's the one in the cover, hahaha. xD
Ahem, why I wrote this at 1:26 am? Well, while trying to get my mind start working again and continue with my other unfinished stories, I decided to help my brain ease playing a little with my head-canon Patty's mind… err, hope you liked it. Reviews are loved.
That Patty seriously trust Kid and Liz to not be bothered by having to fight the Kishin... Jeez, she even preffers fighting Azura than Crona! What a simple silly girl. :P
Tschüss!