This is a little drabble that came to me after all the spoilers and stuff we've had on tumblr. So yeah, minor spoiler alert but not really so yeah. But please enjoy and leave a review if you have any comments. Thanks. :D
Blaine could barely see the road through the tears in his eyes but he still kept driving. He was feeling reckless, not caring whether he made it to his destination or not. Speaking of, he didn't really know where his destination was. He swallowed another sob, chocking a little on it and letting out a small strangled noise, but there was no one to hear it. No one in the car with him. No one to hold his hand and sing with him, worry that he was driving too far for too long, that was over.
He knew what he needed. He needed a parent. Someone to hold him, stroke his hair and tell him it would get better. A parent would know how to make the pain go away. But that was just another gaping hole in his chest. An old wound that paled next to this new raw pain that tore through his chest and stole each breath he dragged in.
He saw a yellow light and pressed down one foot, not really sure if he was speeding up or slowing down. It seemed to be the latter as he pulled up at a junction. He knew this junction well, how many times had he gone through it with Kurt?, and suddenly he couldn't stop the memories flooding his senses.
I have to let you go Blaine.
Kurt's voice echoed through the car.
I'm so sorry.
He had received the call this morning, excitement bubbling through him when he saw the picture of him and Kurt flashing up on his phone, but all that changed the moment he heard Kurt's voice.
Blaine, we need to talk.
He closed his eyes as more tears came, flowing thick and fast down his cheeks. Why had he even told Kurt about the scholarship to UCLA, he'd never intended to take it so why had he even brought it up? Now Kurt was convinced that he was holding Blaine back and Blaine was even more determined not to take it than ever.
I won't tie you down Blaine. I have to set you free.
The light changed and Blaine just about managed to pull away, realising a few minutes later where he was going. A parent figure, someone to take the pain away.
Blaine took a left, trying his hardest not to look at the familiar surroundings that hit him hard anyway. His own parents had completely failed him, his brother was awol, but he knew one person, one man who could help, who would understand.
He pulled up outside the Hudson-Hummel house and parked, taking a deep breath as he studied the house that used to be his solace. Kurt's voice came to him again and he could picture the tear stained face that would go with it.
Take the scholarship, Blaine. Go to California and live your dreams.
Blaine wasn't sure how he was supposed to live his dreams without Kurt.
Clambering out the car Blaine smoothed his cardigan, wandering if it was weird to come to his boyfr- ex-boyfriend's house for comfort. He knocked on the door and held his breath, praying Burt was in and that he wouldn't have to turn around and head back to his empty house. He was terrified of what he might do if he was left alone.
"Blaine?"
Blaine's head snapped up as the door swung open and he let out a breath at the sight of Burt Hummel, the only father figure Blaine had ever had.
"Kurt-" That was as far as Blaine got before he lost it, sobs ripping up from his chest and more tears flowing than he would have thought possible.
"Aw, Kiddo." Burt mumbled, pulling Blaine into his arms and holding him tightly against his chest.
Blaine tried to take a deep breath as Burt patted his back but he was out of control, his breathing reduced to short sharp gasps in an attempt to get oxygen into his body. Burt held him through it, patting his back gently and letting him get it all out until the sobs slowed and eventually stopped. Blaine's breathing got more regular, turning into hiccups that he tried to smother, pulling back from Burt.
"Come on in Kiddo, I'll put the kettle on."
Blaine moved into the living room, hating how the whole place just reminded him of Kurt and all the best memories he had.
Burt came back in with two cups of coffee, handing one to Blaine before sitting down next to him and looking at him expectantly.
"Kurt broke up with me." Blaine whispered in the smallest voice he could muster, as if saying it quietly would somehow make it less real.
"I know." Burt replied, taking a sip of his drink.
"What?" Blaine snapped up his head, staring at Burt in shock. "How?"
"Well, Kurt's my son so..."
"Oh yeah." Somehow Blaine had forgotten that Kurt would have talked to his father. "What, er... what did he say?"
"He said you got a scholarship from UCLA and that you were going to refuse it because you wanted to go to New York." Blaine nodded into his coffee, avoiding Burt's eye, afraid of what he might see there. "He also said that breaking up with you was the hardest thing he'd ever done. Including confronting that Karofsky kid."
"He did? Really?" Blaine couldn't help the slight flicker of hope in his chest. He looked up, meeting Burt's gaze and realising there was nothing but concern there.
"Yeah." There was silence for a moment before Blaine spoke again.
"What shall I do?"
"I can't tell you that Blaine. Do you want the scholarship?" Blaine hadn't honestly thought about that. He was so sure he was going to New York that the thought of not was just... incomprehensible.
"I don't think so." Blaine said slowly. "I just... I just want Kurt."
"I know you do Kiddo." Burt gripped Blaine's shoulder. "It's not my place to tell you what to do, but I would advise that you give it some time. Let the shock subside, give yourself a chance to imagine a life without Kurt and then decide if it's worth taking the scholarship."
Blaine sniffed, checking Burt's face for the sincere and caring look and feeling a little better. Just being told that there was a life after Kurt, that it didn't have to end now, was immensely reassuring, and he could almost consider going to LA as a legitimate option.
"Thank you Burt." Blaine sniffed again, tears still pressing behind his eyes but feeling less urgent now.
"You're welcome Kid. You know as well as I do how stubborn Kurt is, but if it's meant to be, it will."
Blaine nodded, mind wandering to the stack of papers and pamphlets on his desk about UCLA that he had so far ignored. Maybe it was about time he looked at them and considered this properly.
Blaine stayed for another half hour, just catching up with Burt, before deciding it was about time he headed home. As he pulled away from the curb he realised exactly what he might be leaving behind. Not just his boyfriend, but the best family he had.
Two weeks later
Blaine bit his lip as the phone rang. And rang. And rang.
He was just about to give up when the ringing stopped.
"Hello?"
Kurt sounded distracted and Blaine wandered if he had realised who was phoning.
"Hi Kurt." Blaine tried to keep the catch out of his voice, failing as tears pricked behind his eyes. God, would he ever stop crying?
"Blaine? No, we-"
"Kurt stop." There was silence for a moment. "I just need you to listen to me and then you can say whatever you want."
"Blaine, I-" Kurt tried, but Blaine cut across him.
"I'm not going to LA. No freaking way. It's too hot, and sandy and the people are all freakishly tall." Kurt let out a high pitched giggle, the strain evident in his voice. "The university is way outside the town and the dorm rooms are smaller than at Dalton. And worst of all, I couldn't find a single shop in all of LA that would sell me bowties." Blaine took a deep breath, trying to get rid of the quaver in his voice so he could carry on. "NYU is perfect. The weather will allow me to wear my cardigans and bowties in the winter, and my boat shoes in the summer. There are exactly four bowtie shops within three subway stops of the dorms and the average height of a New Yorker is five foot ten inches.
"Kurt, I was never going to New York because you were there. Sure, it's a major bonus, but New York is where I belong. Just like you. And I'm not going to not go just because you broke up with me. I still love you Kurt, and I'll fight for you if I have to, but I'm coming to New York regardless. It's my home and you're my heart."
"Oh Blaine." Kurt was clearly crying and it shoved Blaine over the edge and into the abyss, his own tears falling heavily as he clutched at the phone like a life line. "I love you too. I'm sorry for what I did, what I said, but I don't want you to make such a massive decision just for me. That would just lead to so much resentment and I couldn't handle that. I'm so, so sorry."
"Just take it back Kurt." Blaine sobbed, needing to hear the words and wandering if his tears were happy or sad or just all round desperate, desperate to hold Kurt in his arms. "Say you take it back."
"Baby I will. But only if you're certain that this is the right decision. This is so-"
"Kurt, I've never been more sure about anything in my life." Blaine cut in again. "I'm sure about you and I'm sure about New York. California has nothing to do with it."
"Then I take it back Blaine. I take it back. God, I love you so much, so much. I'm so sorry."
And then they were both crying and apologising, exchanging desperate 'I love you's and agreeing to Skype the next night, just needing to see one another, even though it would be another three weeks till Blaine could get out to New York and hold Kurt in his arms.
Eventually they rang off, and Blaine just sat on his bed, letting his heart slowly pull itself back together. His future was getting clearer by the minute. Getting his degree in musical theatre from NYU, holidays at the Hudson-Hummel's, and endless years with Kurt by his side. He would never let doubt separate them again, as it turned out, it was meant to be.
