Chapter 1: Meatpuppets, "Backwater"
---------------
iAnd when I wake up in the morning
To feel the day break on my face
There's a buzz that's flowing through the ceiling
With a knife to open up the sky's veins
Some things will never change
You just stand there looking backward half unconscious from the pain
It may seem pre-arranged
In the backwater, swirling, there is something that'll never change./i
--------------
"Ron, stop whimpering."
Kim's request was met with a muffled whimper.
The pair were currently dangling from the belly of a helicopter, having recently been pulled off a sinking aqua-lab Drakken decided to stock with several illegal (as well as stolen) mutant sea-monster type beasties. DNAmy was so furious at their theft that she had actually made a hit on the site, managing to land herself in prison for actually creating the things. Drakken was heading there too, having been knocked unconscious by one of Ron's foolish but incredibly well timed stumbles.
"Chaos Theory." Wade had reminded her.
Whatever it was, Ron really had it going for him.
A shriek interrupted her musings.
"Honestly, Ron!"
"It was Rufus!"
The naked mole rat squealed protest as Kim rolled her eyes and tried to ignore both of them.
So, DNAmy and Drakken were both done until they managed to escape prison, which meant that they wouldn't be hearing from the villains for about two weeks, give or take. The lab was sinking, the monsters were history, which left only one loose end.
Shego.
Kim had to hand it to her, even if Shego couldn't get away with a crime, she could almost always get away.
----
Stealing, Shego decided, was a lot like sex.
First, there was the thrill of the hunt. Stalking potential prey. Then, the clever infiltration through barriers and wards, whether they be laser alarms or the standard barfly insecurity and inferiority complex. Finally, the sweet glory that came from the a theft or seduction.
She scowled.
Actually, she liked sex better. Mostly because she was very rarely assailed by a cheerleader at the cusp of orgasm and thwarted. Every. Single. Time.
On the other hand, Shego was very bad at sweet talking. These things do tend to even themselves out.
So, Drakken was off to prison. Again. And Shego would break him out. Again. That was how these things worked for her. It certainly saved her the trouble of finding something to do while the idiot tried to find his own way out of jail.
But did she really want to? All this losing... it was bad for her image. And self-esteem. And possibly her complexion.
Shego was a very good thief. She deserved better.
Well, at the very least, she needed her own lair. Having all her stuff destroyed every time Drakken failed was really starting to irk her.
----
"'Gee Mr. Henderson, I could've done the history report, but I was too busy saving the world.' That should totally be a valid excuse for me."
"Mmm." Monique grunted, clearly not paying attention.
"It's not like I tell Drakken when he should pester me with one of his lame world takeover attempts. 'I'm busy Thursday. How about Sunday afternoon? Oh, but not too late, it's a school night.'"
"Mmm-hmm." Monique interjected, filing her nails.
"It's not like I have all the time that everybody else does! But do I get extensions? Nooo. It's all 'You can save the world from mutant fish monsters and evil spinning tops of doom, but you can't throw together one history report?'"
"Gotta hate those spinning tops. Gotcha."
"You're not listening to a word I say, are you?"
"Mmm."
"KP!" The shout made both girls twitch as Ron barreled through the hallway. "Have you tried filling out any college applications yet? I don't understand half the stuff they want me to do."
"I haven't." Kim admitted, shuffling her papers.
Monique arched an eyebrow. "Girl, you really need to get on that. We're seniors! Even Ron's taking this seriously. And you know that if he's started and you haven't, something's wrong."
Oblivious, Ron continued, "Look here, it says that I need to list my high school courses taken..."
Ignoring him, Kim glared at Monique and rolled her eyes. "I know, I know! But it's so hard to find time! And I really don't even know if I should go to college."
"But it only gives me twelve spaces! Twelve! I know I've taken way more than twelve classes!" Ron bit his lip as he intensely studied his University application.
Monique's eyes widened. "Are you serious? You can't just not go to college!"
"Why not?" Kim shot back. "I've pretty much got this cheerleading superhero thing down. All I really need to do is start charging."
"But that's not gonna keep you set through your *whole* life! I mean, you can't really get much insurance or healthcare plans out of a crime fighting career. Or dental, come to think of it. Think about your future! You may need those teeth someday!"
Kim sighed. "Look, I know, just forget I said it. I'm just really, really tired."
Monique arched an eyebrow.
"Drakken, Shego, mutants, sea lab, explosions." Kim elaborated.
"Some things never change." Monique giggled, as she and Kim walked off to their next class.
"So anyway, I was thinking that maybe I should just write down my important classes and leave out the stupid ones. What do you think Kim?" Ron paused in his studious scrawling. "Kim?"
His voice echoed in the deserted hallway.
"Aw, man."
---------------
iAnd when I wake up in the morning
To feel the day break on my face
There's a buzz that's flowing through the ceiling
With a knife to open up the sky's veins
Some things will never change
You just stand there looking backward half unconscious from the pain
It may seem pre-arranged
In the backwater, swirling, there is something that'll never change./i
--------------
"Ron, stop whimpering."
Kim's request was met with a muffled whimper.
The pair were currently dangling from the belly of a helicopter, having recently been pulled off a sinking aqua-lab Drakken decided to stock with several illegal (as well as stolen) mutant sea-monster type beasties. DNAmy was so furious at their theft that she had actually made a hit on the site, managing to land herself in prison for actually creating the things. Drakken was heading there too, having been knocked unconscious by one of Ron's foolish but incredibly well timed stumbles.
"Chaos Theory." Wade had reminded her.
Whatever it was, Ron really had it going for him.
A shriek interrupted her musings.
"Honestly, Ron!"
"It was Rufus!"
The naked mole rat squealed protest as Kim rolled her eyes and tried to ignore both of them.
So, DNAmy and Drakken were both done until they managed to escape prison, which meant that they wouldn't be hearing from the villains for about two weeks, give or take. The lab was sinking, the monsters were history, which left only one loose end.
Shego.
Kim had to hand it to her, even if Shego couldn't get away with a crime, she could almost always get away.
----
Stealing, Shego decided, was a lot like sex.
First, there was the thrill of the hunt. Stalking potential prey. Then, the clever infiltration through barriers and wards, whether they be laser alarms or the standard barfly insecurity and inferiority complex. Finally, the sweet glory that came from the a theft or seduction.
She scowled.
Actually, she liked sex better. Mostly because she was very rarely assailed by a cheerleader at the cusp of orgasm and thwarted. Every. Single. Time.
On the other hand, Shego was very bad at sweet talking. These things do tend to even themselves out.
So, Drakken was off to prison. Again. And Shego would break him out. Again. That was how these things worked for her. It certainly saved her the trouble of finding something to do while the idiot tried to find his own way out of jail.
But did she really want to? All this losing... it was bad for her image. And self-esteem. And possibly her complexion.
Shego was a very good thief. She deserved better.
Well, at the very least, she needed her own lair. Having all her stuff destroyed every time Drakken failed was really starting to irk her.
----
"'Gee Mr. Henderson, I could've done the history report, but I was too busy saving the world.' That should totally be a valid excuse for me."
"Mmm." Monique grunted, clearly not paying attention.
"It's not like I tell Drakken when he should pester me with one of his lame world takeover attempts. 'I'm busy Thursday. How about Sunday afternoon? Oh, but not too late, it's a school night.'"
"Mmm-hmm." Monique interjected, filing her nails.
"It's not like I have all the time that everybody else does! But do I get extensions? Nooo. It's all 'You can save the world from mutant fish monsters and evil spinning tops of doom, but you can't throw together one history report?'"
"Gotta hate those spinning tops. Gotcha."
"You're not listening to a word I say, are you?"
"Mmm."
"KP!" The shout made both girls twitch as Ron barreled through the hallway. "Have you tried filling out any college applications yet? I don't understand half the stuff they want me to do."
"I haven't." Kim admitted, shuffling her papers.
Monique arched an eyebrow. "Girl, you really need to get on that. We're seniors! Even Ron's taking this seriously. And you know that if he's started and you haven't, something's wrong."
Oblivious, Ron continued, "Look here, it says that I need to list my high school courses taken..."
Ignoring him, Kim glared at Monique and rolled her eyes. "I know, I know! But it's so hard to find time! And I really don't even know if I should go to college."
"But it only gives me twelve spaces! Twelve! I know I've taken way more than twelve classes!" Ron bit his lip as he intensely studied his University application.
Monique's eyes widened. "Are you serious? You can't just not go to college!"
"Why not?" Kim shot back. "I've pretty much got this cheerleading superhero thing down. All I really need to do is start charging."
"But that's not gonna keep you set through your *whole* life! I mean, you can't really get much insurance or healthcare plans out of a crime fighting career. Or dental, come to think of it. Think about your future! You may need those teeth someday!"
Kim sighed. "Look, I know, just forget I said it. I'm just really, really tired."
Monique arched an eyebrow.
"Drakken, Shego, mutants, sea lab, explosions." Kim elaborated.
"Some things never change." Monique giggled, as she and Kim walked off to their next class.
"So anyway, I was thinking that maybe I should just write down my important classes and leave out the stupid ones. What do you think Kim?" Ron paused in his studious scrawling. "Kim?"
His voice echoed in the deserted hallway.
"Aw, man."