Romance of the Three Kingdoms the New Story
Summary: This is the story about the many heroes of Ancient China and their adventures. Rated T for Humor and some jokes.
The history is based on some Dynasty Warriors games and Romance of the Three Kingdoms. This is my first story, I hope you like it! If you like the story, or feel something is wrong and/or can be better, don't feel shy about it and Review! Your feedback is greatly appreciated.
I changed some parts of the story, to make it more funny than the original Romance of the Three Kingdoms.
Chapter 1: The Yellow Turban Rebellion (The Oath in the Garden)
In a small village, that was called Zhou there was a man that, though he was a descendant of the imperial lineage, wasn't as rich and powerful as the emperor was. He was a tall man with "big ears" and had lips so red that people thought he wore lipstick. He was liberal and amiable, sometimes a man of few words. His name was Liu Bei. One day, he noticed a post that wanted people to raise troops and go into the volunteer army to fight the Yellow Turbans and uprising led by a Taoist that exclaimed he was the general of heaven and that he was the chosen one. His name was Zhang Jiao. When Liu Bei finished reading the Post, he let out a long sigh. He wanted to participate in the fight against the Yellow Turbans but, he didn't have the resources to do it. Suddenly, a man with a wild beard and a somewhat fat body approached him and they started to talk.
The Man: Hey why do you let out such long sighs?
Liu Bei: I want to fight for the nation but I don't have the means to do it… What's your name?
The Man: I am Zhang Fei of Yan! I am a meat and wine seller but I don't have so much success on it and sometimes when I drink and celebrate people call me a Drunkard. I LOVE WINE! Don't know about that though… Hey what do you say we raise and army and take on those Yellow Turbans?
Liu Bei: Right... Would you do that? Thank you very much!
Zhang Fei: No problem! So how do they call ya?
Liu Bei: My name is Liu Bei, I don't have a job. I have to live in my parent's house and I'm 23 already! My uncle says that I will bring misfortune to our family and my family doesn't think too high of me for that same reason...
Zhang Fei: Oh man... That's bad...
Suddenly another man approached them; He had a very big beard and was tall of stature. He had a somewhat reddish face.
Other Man: I am Guan Yu. I have been fugitive since uhh well I don't know for slaying a loud man that threatened people in my hometown. I have heard much about Liu Bei's virtue. I was hoping that we could raise an army together and fight the Yellow Turbans.
Liu Bei then explained his and Zhang Fei's plans to him.
Guan Yu: HEY THAT WAS MY IDEA! Well that sounds nice and I won't have to run from the people of my hometown every time I see them. We three may be treated as Heroes!
Zhang Fei: Why don't we go to my farm and be Sworn Brothers?
Liu Bei: Good Idea!
Guan Yu: It's settled, then.
Then three went to Zhang Fei's place and in a ritual became sworn brothers these are the words they said:
Liu Bei: We three, though born on different days and have different names, swear an oath of Brotherhood!
Zhang Fei: And bow to not fight over a woman, and die on the same day!
Liu Bei: What the…? It's not like it!
Zhang Fei: Oh well, I had nothing more to say…
Guan Yu: And by saying those words, we are united like Brothers! May heavens watch us and help us in our goal to restore peace!
Liu Bei: My brothers, destiny awaits!
There was a big party in the farm to celebrate the brother's oath. Many people went crazy and a drunk man escaped with one of Zhang Fei's chickens and went with it to a dark room. Sounds could be heard from outside.
Zhang Fei: Hey you thief and Animal Pedophile! Give me back my chicken! A chicken means money, and I don't wanna lose ma money u know?
Drunken Man: Damn you! I do whatever I like! Go cry to momma! I wanna have sex with something!
Zhang Fei: You will pay for that...!
Zhang Fei then opened the door and threw the drunk man into a near river. The man's fate is unknown for now (Probably he died). After the party everyone went to their houses. Guan Yu went with Liu Bei because he had no home, he was a fugitive.
End of Chapter 1
This is my first Fanfic, hope you have liked it! Chapter 2 is about Cao Cao making a name for himself by defeating Zhang Jiao's brothers