Saudade refers to the feeling of longing for something or someone that you love and which is lost.
The common phrase is "seeing is believing" and you've definitely seen it, but you don't want to believe. Today was the day they came out as a couple and although you were prepared for it, the whole scene nearly tears your heart in two.
"Ah, Hinata-chan."
He sheepishly smiles at you, rubbing the back of his neck with his only free hand. You notice his other one is tenderly intertwined with hers - Hanabi's. You break out of your daze and muster the best smile you can, although you're sure that if Naruto had any ability to thoroughly read your emotions, he'd notice your eyes betrays your expression.
But he doesn't and suddenly you feel the slightest flare of anger towards your sister when you realize you'd always know him just a /little/ bit better than she ever would.
"Naruto..." You hang your head and avert your eyes. The past year has been slowly wearing you down - you need to know how he feels before you continue pursuing him. He sighs. "I'm sorry, Hinata-chan. I just got over Sakura and I can't reciprocate your feelings right now." You wonder when he started using words like that or when he started to sound so grown up.
That was what he told you, but here he was - hand in hand with your little sister.
"Yo, let's get this party started!" Kiba draws attention from the couple and gives you a concerned look before ordering a round of sake for everyone; everyone as in Chouji, Ino, Sakura, himself, the couple, and you. A relatively small group, but everyone seems to be having a good time. Almost everyone, that is.
The night progresses and the more sake you down, the more you can't help but notice that your former teammate has been looking at you a lot' however, Naruto doesn't even cast one glance your way.
It's well into the evening, and when Naruto starts drunkenly placing kisses in various places on Hanabi's face, you take this as your cue to leave. "Good night everyone." You bow to your drunk - and some on the verge of tipsy - friends and quickly leave.
You're proud to say you've come a long way since you were a child, but there's just something about seeing the boy (no, he's a man) you've loved for so long repeatedly show affections towards someone who may as well have been your winning rival. You just-
"Hey, Hinata. Why are you crying?" A tired voice comes from behind you. Kiba has obviously followed you out. You've always wondered how he knew when you cried. Maybe that enhanced smell of his knew the scent of salty tears. You slow to a halt and turn towards him. He has a red tint to his face and his expression- despite the weak smell of sake emanating from him, he looks so concerned and not as drunk as one would think.
Realization dawns on him.
"It's Naruto and Hanabi, isn't it?"
You don't say anything but he knows he's right and so do you.
"Don't mess up your pretty face over a guy who can't see how great you are."
"Kiba-kun..." You breathe, not sure if it's the sake talking or him. "You're still crying." He frowns, his expression growing sad. You hurriedly wipe the tears from your face in an attempt to make it seems as if you were never crying at all. "Seriously, I'm okay now." You give him a smile, but unlike Naruto, he's gotten more perceptive. He doesn't buy it.
Kiba steps forward and wraps his arms around you. "When are you gonna stop lying to me?" He says, his voice barely audible to anyone that might have been walking by. You can't help but being crying again. The next few minutes are riddled with empowering phrases telling you that you're a strong woman, and eventually he starts listing off the things he likes about you - the things he's always liked about you.
"Hinata... I love you. I always did."
You're surprised by these sudden last words, and you feel cold (and just a tiny bit disappointed) when he pulls away. "Why can't you stop looking at him and start looking at me?" He mutters, definitely more to himself than anything, you realize when it dawns on him that he said this out loud. This is a sight you're new to - Kiba's blushing and his hand is covering his mouth, definitely surprised that he uttered those words in the first place.
"Kiba-kun." You rub at your eyes, sniffling.
A/N: and this is where i lost the will to write anymore. adios.