Pressing a fingertip to the corner of her lips, Kirsten delicately wiped away a smudge of excess lipstick before returning her attention to her own reflection in the mirror. She drummed her fingertips against the basin in front of her as she tried to calm the butterflies that were dancing in her stomach, fighting desperately against the urge to turn and fling herself back into the bathroom cubicle that she'd been hiding out in for the previous half an hour. Outside the bathroom door, Kirsten could hear the muffled sounds of chatter, laughter and tinkling glasses that indicated that the party she was supposed to be a part of was still in full swing and showing no signs of slowing down. Kirsten sighed as she flicked her eyes over her mirrored image, taking in her carefully applied makeup, the pretty sky blue dress that she'd picked out especially for the occasion, and the snowflake shaped pendant around her neck that she probably shouldn't have worn. The jewellery triggered a spate of memories; memories she'd tried to keep suppressed over the years but somehow always came back to her in the most surprising of moments. Lost in her thoughts, Kirsten jumped a mile when the bathroom door swung open and Camille slipped inside, smiling hesitantly at her friend through the mirrored reflection.
"Everything ok in here?" Camille asked gently, and Kirsten wrinkled her nose as she turned to face the pretty brunette.
"I'm sorry, I'm ruining your party," Kirsten murmured, and Camille waved her hand around dismissively as she leaned back against the wall.
"Please, there's enough Ahluwalia's out there to keep the party going all night long," she quipped. "There's a few people who are looking for you though."
Kirsten grimaced.
"I honestly thought I was ready," she said, leaning back against the basin and huffing out a breath. "I mean, it's been five years..."
"Five years can suddenly feel like five seconds when you're around the right person," Camille commented, and Kirsten tucked her hair behind her ear as she gave a half-nod of agreement. It had been over five years since Cameron had pulled her out of that last fateful stitch, kicking and screaming and begging for him to put her back. She'd been an emotional wreck, devastated beyond all comprehension, and she'd made it no secret that she blamed Cameron for her distress. Even as the Stitchers program quickly shut down around them and the team dispersed, Cameron continued to try and help Kirsten, but she had railed against him. She was drowning in the depths of her own despair, and she took it all out on Cameron, saying so many horrible things that even after all the time that had passed still made her cringe. Kirsten didn't even remember the day that he'd finally left; she'd more realised it only days later when it had finally dawned on her that he hadn't come back to her side. Even then, she was so caught up in her own tangled web of emotions that it was only months later, when Camille had called from her new job in Nevada with the news of Cameron's move to London and subsequent marriage to Nina, that Kirsten snapped out of her misery. The news had hit her like a bullet to the chest, and threatened to emotionally cripple her all over again, but Kirsten fought harder and clawed her way back to life. She headed back to school and found a job using the math and computers that had always kept her grounded, and made the decision to sell her childhood home in an attempt to take steps into feeling like she'd made some kind of recovery. She'd found the snowflake necklace hidden in a box in the closet while she was packing up the house, and even as she now shared a forlorn smile with Camille, she fingered the pendant absently. From the moment Cameron had walked into the reception hall, Kirsten had watched as his eyes immediately sought her out, but panic had seized her and she'd managed to slip away before he'd found her.
"Look, if this is all too much for you right now, maybe we can reschedule," Camille offered, and Kirsten cracked her first genuine smile of the evening.
"You're kidding, right?" she giggled. "It's your wedding, Camille."
"And if you, my very best friend, which by the way, still blows my mind," Camille countered, "are not able to stand next to me, I'll postpone for as long as it takes."
"No offense, Camille, but you really don't have that kind of time," Kirsten said with a wry grin, stepping across the bathroom space so that she could place her hands gently on Camille's rounded stomach. Camille rolled her eyes even as a blush spread across her cheeks.
"Yeah, ok, so baby Samir might one-up you," Camille cracked. Kirsten cast her eyes towards the bathroom entry as Bollywood music suddenly began to pulsate under the door, and Camille started to laugh fondly. After a few years apart, Linus and Camille had literally stumbled into each other on the Las Vegas strip, and it hadn't taken them long to fall back into their happily dysfunctional relationship. Their connection was undeniably perfect, and Kirsten was genuinely happy that Camille had found a family to call her own.
"You need to get back out there," Kirsten smiled. "It's your rehearsal dinner. People are going to notice you're gone."
"Well, I am the life of any party," Camille quipped with a lazy grin, and then laid her hand over the top of Kirsten's. "What about you?"
"I might sneak out, if that's ok," Kirsten said to her. "I just need some time, so that I can be the best maid of honour ever for you tomorrow."
Camille pouted at her a little, but gave her hand a squeeze before she backed away.
"I'll create a distraction," she said with a wink, cracking the door open and letting a blast of music into the room.
"Thank you," Kirsten mouthed, and Camille grinned before exiting the bathroom, throwing her hands in the air as she went. Kirsten couldn't help but smile when she heard the happy cheer that greeted the bride-to-be's return to the party. Throwing one last glance at her reflection, Kirsten collected her purse and then stuck her head out of the door to assess her easiest exit. Camille and Linus were in the centre of the dance floor, surrounded by Linus's numerous cousins, but it took Kirsten a moment to locate Cameron, standing in a corner of the room and nursing a beer bottle as he talked with Fisher, though Kirsten could see he was still scanning the room for her. Breathing out a sigh of relief when Maggie approached the pair and effectively blocked Cameron's view of the room, Kirsten near sprinted out of the hall and dove into her car. Kirsten barely allowed herself to think until she pulled into the garage of her apartment. Removing her keys from the ignition, Kirsten huffed out a breath as she leaned her head back against the headrest. She'd known it, and tried to fight it, but it had been triggered all over again the moment Cameron stepped into her line of vision. Her love for Cameron had never disappeared, and she doubted it ever would. Kirsten screwed up her nose in frustration as tears prickled in her eyes. He'd moved on, and she had no one to blame but herself, so she had to pull herself together just long enough to be Camille's maid of honour, and then Cameron would disappear again and maybe, just maybe, Kirsten would be able to make some vague attempt at moving on with her life.