(¯`·.HP/SS.·´¯)
"Albus, please, do something about this." Minerva pleaded, her voice breathy and strained. She couldn't stand to see two of her favorite people arguing like this all of the time. It was the one draw back to having Harry Potter on the staff at Hogwarts.
"What would you suggest I do?" The old man asked, flicking his gaze between the Deputy Headmistress and the arguing men in his office. He had forged a silence barrier around the two men so he might have a chance to hear himself think.
"I suggest making them see that they must coexist peacefully. What kind of example do you think it sets for the students to witness two of their best professors engaging in arguments?" She asked. "Why not send them to that enchanted house of yours that takes the furniture away if its occupants argue?"
"You mean the safe house in the Hawaiian islands?" Albus asked, seriously considering the idea.
"Yes that one. It's out of the way, they would be isolated with no chance at getting away from each other, they would have to learn to cooperate whether they liked it or not, and a little sun wouldn't hurt either of them, they're both as pale as sheets." She stated definitely.
Harry had been working at Hogwarts for 6 years now. His first 2 years, he and Snape had been coexisting quite peacefully, and during his third year, they had even been pleasant to each other, spending time in each others company. However, when they came back after that summer, at the beginning of his fourth year of teaching, the two men had started drifting apart, seeming to revert back to the way they acted during the first two years. Once his sixth year of teaching had started, Harry and Snape had been arguing over every little thing, like cats and dogs. They would bicker constantly, exchange barbs laced with venom, and there was a rumor going around that Snape had tried to poison Harry at one point.
Dumbledore nodded absently and removed the silencing charm. "-and to be quite frank, I would rather be forced into coitus with an ELEPHANT!" Severus shouted loudly, his voice echoing throughout the room.
"Well that's fine and dandy, because I would rather you be screwed by an elephant as well!" Harry shouted back.
"SILENCE!" Dumbledore shouted, gathering their attention. "You two have done nothing but argue and fight all year long, and you're going to learn to work together!" He stated vehemently. "You're being transported to a safe house for two weeks, starting now." He quickly shoved a trinket into their hands, whispered a phrase, and the two were sent to the house that was charmed to take things away should they argue with one another.
(¯`·.HP/SS.·´¯)
That evening found Harry sitting in the living room of the 2 bedroom safe house, reading a book calmly. Severus stalked into the room, and when Harry looked up, he nodded. Smiles spread on both of their faces. "I must say Professor Potter, this has been one of your more brilliant ideas."
Harry nodded a bit, scooting over and patting the seat next to him. "Thank you Professor Snape. I thought it was quite grand myself."
Severus sauntered over to the couch, then sat casually, raising an eyebrow at the young man. "What are we going to do about supper?"
"Oh, I was thinking that I would make that casserole you love so much."
"You mean that American one with the sausage and grits?"
"Yeah, that's the one. The house is charmed to provide any food we might need."
Severus leaned back, pulling Harry bodily up towards his chest and wrapping his arms around the younger man. "We must come up with something different to do for next year so we don't arise suspicion." He stated, nibbling a bit on Harry's neck.
"Mmmmm yes." Harry agreed, moaning a bit. "It's not all that often you get an all expense paid two week vacation to a tropical island in celebration your anniversary, now is it?" He reached back and carded his fingers through Severus' hair.
"Indeed." The older man said, breathing in the scent of his young lover.
Halfway across the world, Minerva McGonagall was sitting alone in her chambers, smiling to herself. She was quite proud of her actions today. She would also be rewarded handsomely when Severus and Harry came back for being able to pull the wool over Albus' eyes with her not-to-subtle suggestion of a tropical safe house. Really, how the meddling old man didn't realize the implications of a house that worked on a reward system for cooperation in the middle of such a location was beyond her capacity. She only hoped that they didn't christen at least one of the bedrooms, as she was due to be spending the summer there herself.