She said she missed him, then told him to forget that she had even admitted it.
He had backed off for awhile, tried to be noble while she worked on things with Dex, but the past few days sitting next to her in that damn van….she was out of her mind if she thought she could just drop that line on him and walk away and he'd let it go.
"Forget it?"
Almost reluctantly Traci turned back to face him.
"Trace…" He began.
She shook her head slightly, "It's…"
He could see that she was still fighting with herself and it was getting to her. His Traci, so damn stubborn.
He sighed. "Come here."
He pulled her close and hugged her. It felt so good to have her in his arms again he thought as he gently kissed her cheek.
Jerry sighed as he thought about the ridiculousness of their situation. He wanted her, and he knew she wanted him, the only thing keeping them apart was her misguided belief that trading in her own happiness was the path to her son's happiness.
She pulled back and looked into his eyes. He saw it then, she was feeling the weight of her choices, what she was denying herself and it was hurting her. "It's all right," he said gently as he pulled her closer kissing her on the cheek again. She felt so right up against him.
When they pulled back he could see her struggling with her indecision, then she leaned in slightly and their lips met in a kiss.
Jerry pulled away looked into her eyes and saw the surrender there and leaned in to kiss her again, deeper. It felt like heaven to kiss those lips again, to taste her. Oh God he wanted her. After a moment he forced himself to end the kiss. Still holding her in his arms he made up his mind, to hell with backing off.
"Trace, we're standing in the middle of the lot, anymore of this and everyone will know our business. We should continue this somewhere a little more private."
Traci looked around nervously as it began to sink in. "I've got to get home Jer." She said weakly.
Jerry smiled, he almost felt bad for her. It really was sort of cute that she actually thought he was going to let her go without finishing what they had started. Allow her to run away so she could refortify her resolve and put those walls right back up. It was completely delusional, but still kind of cute.
He wasn't a cheat, and he didn't want her to be a cheat but right now he didn't feel even a twinge of guilt about what was going to happen, and it was going to happen. He wasn't doing noble anymore, being noble was highly overrated, noble sucked. He'd feel guilty tomorrow, guilty and really really happy, though maybe not in that order.
He leaned over and nibbled lightly on her ear. "Actually," he whispered, "what you are going to do is call home and complain about all the extra paperwork tonight's operation has left you with, while I drive us to my place. So we can…talk things out." Talk, he cracked himself up sometimes. "Yeah we really need to…talk. We'll come back for your car later."
Traci let out a laugh. She didn't know why she was still trying to fight this, it really was a losing battle, but seriously, who did he think he was kidding. "If we go to your place Jerry it won't be to talk."
Jerry smiled. Ah sweet victory he thought as he led her around to the passenger side of the car and opened the door for her. "When we get to my place there will definitely be some talking, at some point," he said reassuringly as she slid into the car. He closed the door behind her and practically ran back to the driver's side and slid in next to her. God he missed those lips he thought as he leaned in and pulled her close for another kiss. One for the road he figured.
He started the car before turning back to her with a crooked grin on his face. "The way I remember it there was always some talking…. stuff like Jerry you're so good, Jerry just like that, Jerry you're the best I've ever had."
Traci had to laugh, she loved this man, she truly did. "I'm pretty sure I don't recall ever saying anything like that."
Jerry winked at her as he pulled the car out. "You were thinking it, I could tell, I'm fluent in moan and groan. By the way don't think I haven't noticed you undressing me with your eyes the past few months. Absolutely shameless Officer Nash."
She snorted. "Well Detective Barber it wasn't nearly as shameless as your pathetic attempts to pretend you weren't checking me out every second you could." She grinned as she leaned back into her seat while Jerry started the car and pulled out. She had missed this, the easy humor, the energy between them. She had just missed him so damn much. She had no idea what she was going to about Dex, or how she was going to explain this but she did know that she was exactly where she wanted to be right now.