A/N: Hi all! Please leave a review if you like the drabble/story, even just a phrase. Reviews give me life) Thank you!
1.
Anonymous asked: Ooh, and another Milathos prompt; 'Porthos had never heard Athos make a joke about his sex life before'.
"Once we did it in thebathtub… In a female-only establishement."
Another round of laughter from his friends followed. Having Athos be appointed Captain surely had it's perks. The weekly tradition of getting together in his office was certainly one of them. Loud and noisy Taverns were forgotten: the office was private and the exitement of being able to discuss any matters without the chance of being overheard was still fresh.
"Porthos. How unchivalrious of you." Athos, very much comfortable in his own chair, his feet propped up on the table, snorted with an amused smile.
"Come on!" Porthos sat down on the same very table, leaning towards Aramis who was reclining on the plush sofa – also a recent addition to the room. "I'm sure our friend Aramis here has even less chivalrious tales to tell. Spill, man, what was the least unconventional place you did it in?"
"Er… The convent?"
"I think in that particular case it was the "who" he did it with that really counted as unconventional." D'Artagnan cut in from his favourite windowsill location.
"Am I ever going to live this down?"
"As in the guy who upstaged doing it in a convent by doing it in a convent with the Queen? I don't think so." Porthos smugly twisted his moustache and doged the pillow flying at him from the couch.
"Let him be, Porthos. You might make him take a run for the convent again and I need him in the garrison."
That was the moment Aramis had had enough.
"Really, Athos? Well let me tell you - I don't mind taking the mockery for my adventures. At least I have some… Had some."
"Oooh. This is getting interesting." D'Artagnan propped himself up on the windowsill.
"And you would assume that I have none for which reason exactly?"
"For the obvious one. Since Milady got back nothing seems to have changed between you two. It must be a long sad, lonely dry spell, my friend."
"Hm." Athos pursed his lips in a content smile.
"He has a point, Athos. The only thing new in your life is that sofa." Porthos shrugged sympathetically. "We should take you out or something. You can't go on like this, it's not heatly."
"Thank you, Porthos, that's very thoughtful of you."
D'Artagnan felt more then guessed something was off. Maybe it was the strange expression Athos's face held, maybe it was all the wine, but suddenly the dots connected in his head.
"Wait. Guys… Look at it this way: Milady comes back…" There was an air of suspence in the room as three pair of eyes focused on the younger Musketeer. "The sofa appears."
"What do you… Oh!" Aramis jumped off the sofa as soon as realization hit him. "You didn't!" he tried to stare Athos down.
An enigmatic smile gave him all the answeres he was dreading to hear.
"Really, Athos! Good for you!" Porthos exclaimed happily.
Athos's gaze shifted from the sofa to the table Porthos was sitting on. There was a vertain wistfullness in his eyes. A wistfullness that made Porthos get off the table with lightning speed.
"Seriously?" Porthos asked and Athos shrugged casually, not saying a word.
"Is the windowsill safe at least?" Came the voice from the back of the room. An arched eyebrow from Athos and D'Artagnan joined his friends in the center of the office, careful not to brush against any surface.
"We're going back to the Tavern. This…" Aramis morioned vaguely around the four of them. "Is never happening here again. Not while the other thing is… happening here." Stern looks from Porthos and D'Artagnan showed they were with Aramis on that one.
"What thing? I didn't say anything." Athos retorted, getting up and getting hid sword. "To the Tavern then, shall we?"