It was official- fate hated Kimihiro Watanuki. There was no other explanation for his borderline terrible luck. Because, honestly, what were the odds of buying the perfect sweater for a Christmas party (complete with a cat pun and all) only to find out that someone else was wearing the same one. And not only that- now everyone thought he and that person were dating.

It wouldn't have been bad if it was sweet and beautiful Himawari-chan he was supposedly dating, but nothing ever went according to Watanuki's desires. Oh, no. Now everyone thought he was dating his annoying neighbor- Shizuka Doumeki. The moment he had heard that was probably the worst in his whole life and he worked for Yuuko so that was saying something. And the worst thing was that the person in question didn't seem bothered by the preposterous rumor everyone was spreading. On the contrary- he was stuffing his face with the gingerbread cookies Watanuki had spent all morning making without a care in the world.

''How can you be so calm about this?!'' Doumeki just shrugged and reached for another cookie, but Watanuki slapped his hand away. ''When people ask you something they expect an answer. Use words. And I didn't make these for you- they are for everyone, you pig.''

''Why are you getting so worked up over this?''

''Because the last thing I want is for people to think I'm dating you. What does that say about my taste? And what will Himawari-chan think?!'' Watanuki didn't even want to think about that. After all his efforts a stupid sweater would ruin everything.

He had shown it to Himawari-chan the day he'd bought it and she'd loved it (because, really, who didn't love cat puns?). Who could have guessed that everything would go into such a horrible direction? ''Where did you get that sweater from anyway? I really can't imagine you going clothes shopping.''

''It was a Christmas present from Kunogi.''

It had to be a lie. There was no way Himawari-chan would do that. Yuuko-san? Sure. She lived just to torture him. But Himawari-chan? He couldn't imagine an angel like her doing that.

''If you don't believe me, ask her.'' Doumeki said as he munched on a cookie. Watanuki hadn't realized when he had managed to snatch another one. That cretin!

''Ask me what?''

''Himawari-chan!'' His mood lightened the moment he saw her like it always did. It was hard to stay down when she was in the same room as him. ''We were talking about this guy's sweater. He claims you got it for him as a Christmas present.''

''Oh, yes.''

Watanuki's jaw dropped. "What?"

Himawari-chan smiled one of those smiles that shined brighter than the sun. "I really loved yours so I thought it would be nice if you two had matching ones. You get on so well, after all." Her assumptions were wrong on so many levels. Watanuki didn't know from where to begin the explanation. "Yuuko-san thought it was a good idea, too." Of course she had. After all, her only entertainment came from putting him in embarrassing situations.

He was about to tell her how wrong this whole thing was when she interrupted him. "Well, I'll leave you two to your own devices. Sakura-chan just arrived and I promised I'd spend some time with her. See you around, Watanuki-kun, Doumeki-kun."

The last flicker of light for Watanuki disappeared together with her. Now he was left alone with the bane of his existence, who was reaching for yet another cookie.

"What did I tell you?!" He was about to slap his hand away again, but gave up and sighed. Screw the cookies. Let Doumeki eat them if he so desired. Watanuki had enough of him this evening.

"Hey, Watanuki!"

He made his way to the toilet, ignoring Doumeki's yelling. Whatever he wanted to say was definitely of no importance. Sometimes he felt like the other was just wasting air for nothing worthy of hearing came out of his-

WHAT IN THE WORLD?!

He had just opened the door to the bathroom, thinking he could get some privacy there, and was greeted with something he had never wanted to see. He was pretty sure he could never unsee it either.

They were having sex. Kurogane and Fai were having sex right in front of him and he wanted to move, but he was far too shocked to do so. His face was flushed red and at first he could not utter a word, not even when they turned their heads to look at him.

Kurogane immediately looked back at Fai. ''Didn't you lock the door, dumbass?'' he yelled at him.

''Must have slipped my mind.'' Fai didn't seem even slightly bothered by the fact that someone had walked in on them. Did that man have no shame? Probably not.

''How can something like that slip your mind?!''

''I was concentrated on other things like your big-''

That was it. Watanuki was not going to listen to the rest of that conversation so he did what he did best- screamed and then slammed the bathroom door closed. He took a few steps back and bumped into someone. ''Oh, my apo-'' he looked up and sighed. ''Oh, it's you. Why are you following me around?''

Doumeki gestured to the door. ''Wanted to see how you were doing after experiencing this.''

''You knew about that! Why didn't you tell me?!''

''I tried, but you ran off before I could finish my sentence. You really should start listening to people.''

That probably was the truth, but at that moment he needed to be mad at somebody and being mad at Doumeki was easy. ''Don't tell me what to do as if you know better than me. Leave me alone.''

Watanuki muttered and started walking away. That was the worst Christmas of his life, everything else seemed like a fairytale compared to it. ''Didn't I tell you to leave me alone?'' Why was he still following him? Did he have nothing better to do than annoy Watanuki?

''Knowing you, you'll probably do something stupid.''

The nerve! He really deserved Watanuki to turn around and punch him in the face. ''I'll just go get a drink.'' He needed to forget about the things he saw at least for a little while. Otherwise they would keep haunting him and there was no way he'd have any fun at this party.

''Exactly. You can't hold your liquor and you know it.''

''That's a big lie. I have no problem holding my liquor and I'd love it if you stopped spreading lies.'' Even if it was true, it was none of Doumeki's business. It was Christmas and Watanuki was an adult so what was wrong with getting a bit drunk? Wasn't that the point of parties anyway?

Out of the corner of his eye he saw his brother making out with his girlfriend on the coach and started walking faster. It made him wonder if he should really drink because the only way these two had ended up in such a situation was if they were both drunk off their asses. What if he ended up making out with someone as well? What if he ended making out with Doumeki?! Alcohol really didn't seem so attractive anymore.

''You know what, I think I'm gonna pass.'' Watanuki as he made his way to the balcony. He needed some fresh air and privacy. He just hoped he wouldn't end up bumping into another couple there.

He did not, but he didn't get his privacy either because the idiot was still following him. ''Didn't I tell you to leave me alone? Why don't you go eat the rest of the cookies or something?''

''I already ate them. They were very good.''

''That doesn't give you a reason to eat all of them! As I told you- I didn't make them only for you. Now no one else will be able to taste my delicious cookies because of your gluttony.''

Doumeki raised an eyebrow. ''Didn't you give another plate to Kunogi at the start of a party?''

Watanuki blushed furiously and looked away. ''W-what are you trying to say?!''

''Did you make this for me?''

''Did not. Totally did not.'' He started laughing nervously. ''… M-maybe I did, but it was only because I knew you were going to eat them all and I wanted at least some to be left for the others. Now that I've admitted that will you leave me alone?''

''I have a Christmas gift for you, too.''

Watanuki turned around to look at Doumeki. ''You do?'' The other nodded and handed him a nicely wrapped package. Watanuki didn't know what to say. He didn't think Doumeki was so thoughtful. He started carefully opening the package so as not to tear the wrapping paper. It was too nice to go to waste.

''Kunogi helped me choose it since I wasn't sure exactly what you'd like.''

''Oh.'' It was a cooking book. He had wanted to get it for some time now, but could never find the time to go to the bookstore due to his busy schedule. He felt his face go red again and turned away from Doumeki. ''T-t-thanks…'' He bit his lip and took a deep breath. ''I-is there anything in particular you want? Just a place of cookies seems very little compared to your gift and I don't want to be indebted to you.''

''Hmm…'' He was actually thinking about it? Maybe there was something he really wanted. ''What about a kiss?'' A kiss. Sure, Watanuki could do tha- WAIT WHAT?!

Watanuki blushed all the way to his ears and sent Doumeki his best glare. ''What kind of request is that?! Do I seem like a person from a kissing booth to you?!''

''In that case there is a chocolate cake I really want to try. Could you make that?''

''You jump straight to food? So a kiss from me equals a chocolate cake in your mind?!'' Watanuki had no idea why he was getting so worked up over this. It just annoyed him greatly for some unknown reason.

''Well, you refused my first request instantly so I just jumped to the next one.''

''Why, you?!'' He grabbed Doumeki's stupid sweater and pressed their lips together. It was clumsy and messy and their noses bumped, but that didn't matter. After all he hadn't kissed Doumeki out of some desire to do so (at least he hoped he hadn't), he had done it to prove a point. It didn't matter if it was bad- a kiss was a kiss.

After what seemed like eternity he pulled away, cheeks red. ''You happy now?''

Doumeki was quiet for a moment, but then he opened his mouth. Watanuki wished he hadn't. ''That was bad.''

''What did you say?!''

''What you heard.''

Oh, he was so gonna get it. He didn't have a right to criticize Watanuki's kiss when he had stayed there frozen. Wasn't he the one who had wanted a kiss in the first place? He could have at least tried to kiss him back so it wasn't so aw-

Doumeki interrupted his train of thought by cupping his cheeks and kissing him again and, oh lord, what a kiss it was. It made Watanuki feel lightheaded. When had Doumeki learned to do that with his tongue? You know what? It didn't matter as long as he continued doing it.

That Christmas Watanuki had an epiphany- maybe making out with Doumeki wasn't so bad. But, of course, he would never admit that out loud.

Written for the CLAMP secret santa on tumblr. I apologise for the many punctuation and grammar errors. I will fix them eventually. I tried to keep everyone in character, but it's the first time I'm writing douwata so I don't know how well that turned out. Doumeki, in particular, was quite a pain in the ass to write.