Summary: The four times that Tori Vega told Jade West she loved her. And the one time that Jade finally said it back.
Pairing: Jade/Tori
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
i.
The rays of the golden sun beat down upon the Latina's already tanned skin, creating a sea of freckles to bounce upon her tiny body. But she doesn't care. She doesn't care because it's recess and it is her favorite part of the day. Even at this new school.
Her parents made her move here. She wasn't too happy about it. She missed her old house and her old friends and her grandma and grandpa. Her Daddy told her that this was where his new job was and that she would make new friends here- perhaps even better friends.
But seven year old Tori Vega didn't believe him.
After all, no friend was better than Katie Jacobs. Who else would eat cookies with her in the sunshine and would watch Lady and the Tramp and sing along with her? There isn't anyone in the world like that here in California. Everyone already has friends. And nobody likes the new girl.
Which is what Tori tried to explain to her Mommy this morning when she dropped her off this morning, along with her older sister, but her Mom didn't quite understand why she couldn't just play with Trina. But Trina already had friends, her older sister always managed to make friends wherever she went. But Tori, Tori was more of a quiet by stander.
So, that's why on the fifteenth day of October, Tori Vega sat by herself at recess, picking endlessly at the peanut butter sandwich her mother had made her. She hated peanut butter. Sighing, she tosses an edge of the bread off to the side as she reaches for her PowerPuff Girl thermos when someone kicks it away from her. Looking up, as she squints at the sun, someone rips the peanut butter sandwich from her hands.
"Hey! That's not very nice!" Tori exclaims to her attacker and the boy just laughs, squatting down to the little girl with an evil gleam in his eye.
"What are you going to do? Cry about it?" Jamie Nickels laughs, pushing Tori as his other friend kicks her PowerPuff Girl thermos again.
"Stop it!" wines Tori.
"Why don't you go back home, cry baby? Nobody wants you here, loser!" Jamie taunts as he shoves Tori again. However, before the tiny brunette has a chance to say anything, she hears a cry and glances to find Jamie on the ground, blood oozing from his lip. Skeptically, she looks up to find a petite raven haired girl standing beside of her, her hand balled up into a fist with a glare in her eyes.
"Didn't your Mom ever tell you not to hit girls?" a feisty Jadelyn West exclaims, stepping closer to the boy who lies on the ground, holding to his lip, and crying.
"I AM GONNA TELL!" wails Jamie and a seven year old Jade just laughs as she crouches near the golden haired devil, a squinting glare in her eye that meant nothing good was about to happen.
"Do it, Jamie. And see what happens to you. I dare you." Jade taunts and even though Tori just met this girl two minutes ago, she knows that it is more of a threat than an actual dare. The two boys stare at her new knight in shining armor for a moment before they finally run away, Jamie holding to his mouth as the tears fall down his checks.
Huffing in her accomplishment, Jade turns back to a tiny Tori Vega who sits, teary eyed staring at the young girl. Instead of saying anything, however, Jade simply reaches for the thermos and hands it to the quiet, shaken girl. Smiling softly, Jade sits down beside of her, plucking the blades of grass between them.
"You okay?" She asks, looking at her new friend from the corner of her eye.
"Mhmmm." Tori mumbles as she grabs a bag of chips from her lunchbox and offers them to the raven haired girl. Smiling softly, Jade takes them with a quiet nod.
"My name's Jade."
"Tori. I'm new here." Tori pipes up in excitement.
"I know." Jade deadpans, not amused by the excitement in her friend's voice, in fact, she was all of a sudden very irritating.
"Do you think we will be friends?" Tori asks eagerly, scooting closer to Jade. To this, the raven haired woman only rolls her eyes as she stands, holding tightly to the bag of Sour Cream and Onion chips in her hand before she flicks her hair dramatically.
"I don't like people." States Jade in annoyance.
"Really? But I love you." Tori whispers, looking up at her wonderstruck as she clutches tightly to the thermos full of chocolate milk that Jade had given back to her.
It wasn't the kind of love that her Mommy had for her Daddy.
It was kind of like how she felt about Buttercup, her favorite PowerPuff who always managed to save the day.
And for seven year old Tori Vega, that was okay.
ii.
The next time Tori tells Jade that she loves her is when they are ten years old and Jade's favorite dog died. Caesar had been the best golden retriever in the world if you asked Jade, he was the one who Jade learned how to walk with, he was there when she fell off her bike and had to have seven stitches in her knee, and he was the one that cuddled her the night that her Daddy left them.
Her Mom had explained that Caesar was getting old and this was the best thing for him, that way he wouldn't be suffering anymore. But Tori didn't quite understand that- Caesar might not be hurting anymore but Jade was. And the fact that Jade was hurting meant that Tori was hurting. It wasn't like the type of hurting that she felt when she fell off her bike and needed five stitches. No, this hurt is different.
This is a hurt in her heart.
And according to her Mom, well, that's the worst kind of hurt.
Jade had made the decision to bury Caesar in her backyard, that way no one would ever separate them. Tori remembers because it was raining that day and Jade didn't bring an umbrella so Tori let her borrow her jacket. They buried Caesar under the old oak tree, next to Jade's fish.
"Sweetie, we will get you another dog," Jade's mom states as she cups her hand on Jade's shoulder. Tori flinches when Jade jerks away, tugging her hand that she was holding along with her. Tori almost thinks that Jade ripped it off.
"I don't want another dog. I want Caesar!" Jade sniffles with a crack in her voice and Tori feels her chest tighten at the sound. Tori had only felt this way once- when her Daddy was crying because her grandma passed away.
"I don't know what to do without him," Jade cries and Tori smiles weakly as she holds out her arms for Jade. The ten year old girl only stares at her "friend" and takes a step back with a sniffle. Before Tori can really think about it, though, she wraps her arms around Jade and Jade is slowly giving into the hug.
"I love you, Jade. It'll be okay." Tori whispers into the rain.
It's not a love like Cinderella has for Prince Charming. It's more like the love that Tommy Pickles has for Dill.
And for ten year old Tori Vega, that was more than okay.
iii.
The third time Tori tells Jade that she loves her, she is fourteen years old. She remembers the occasion because Jude Thomas had just broken up with her, two days before they were supposed to go to spring formal together. He told her something about how his mom told him that he wasn't allowed to go, but Tori knew what it was. In reality, Jude wanted to go with Brianna Jacobs, the head cheerleader.
She hadn't gotten out of her bed the whole day, even when Trina came barging into her room to borrow a necklace that their grandmother had given to Tori for her birthday. Everything hurt, not just her heart this time.
She felt like she was dying. She knew that she wasn't, her Mom had told her that it would feel this way. But in reality, she never thought she would feel this way. After all, she was Tori Vega, shouldn't boys be falling for her, not running to get away from her.
Tori flips the channel to find Cartoon Network, when a clearing of a throat catches her attention. Looking up, she sees a fourteen year old Jade West standing in her doorway, with a carton of her favorite Ben and Jerry's in her hands.
"Just so you know, Jude is an idiot," Jade states with a roll of her eyes, pushing herself off the door facing, walking towards her best friend, "he is an idiot and I may or may not have broken his nose on the way here." She smirks…that smirk, the one that lets Tori know that no matter what, she is always going to have her back.
"Don't you think you'll get in trouble?" Tori asks, as she takes the ice cream from Jade and the raven haired girl shrugs, shoving her spoon into the ice cream.
"I don't care. He hurt you. So, I hurt him." Jade states so nonchalantly as she takes a huge spoonful of the ice cream, shoving it into her mouth. Tori stares at her star struck and the little spitfire girl wrinkles her brow in confusion, "what?" she asks, her mouth still full of ice cream and Tori smiles, a warm blush curling into her cheeks.
"Nothing, I just… love you, Jade." She replies, placing her hand on Jade's leg as she gives it a gentle squeeze.
This time, it feels different.
But fourteen year old Tori Vega can't quite figure out why.
iv.
She is seventeen year old the next time that she tells Jade West that she loves her. She recalls the exact moment those three words come stumbling from her lips. It was a warm autumn day and it was the last day of the festival at the pier. She had begged and begged Jade to go until finally the girl gave in with a grumbling about how "if it would shut her up."
And it had.
The past three months had been hard for Tori. Her Dad was gone a lot, her mother was rarely ever there, Trina had went off to some college (that was a surprise) and Jade had shoved herself so far up her boyfriend's ass that she barely got to see her anymore. Except for tonight. Tonight was their night.
They had ridden every ride possible, at least twice, much to Jade's dismay. They had played almost every game on the pier except for the one they were currently stationed at. There was a giant panda being offered as a prize for the person who could pop the most balloons. Tori had failed and only popped four of the thirty and won a tiny Troll doll that Jade joked was Robbie's twin.
Now, it was Jade's turn. She had five darts and somehow, little to Tori's understanding, she managed to pop twenty five of those thirty balloons.
"How did you do that?!" Tori shrieks in confusion and Jade shrugs her shoulders with a triumphant grin on her face as she grabs the giant panda from the middle aged gentleman. Taking her cotton candy back from her Latina friend, Jade takes a bite as she wrinkles her nose.
"The objective was to break things. I like to break things. I don't know why you are so surprised that I would be awesome at it!" Jade chuckles, taking another bite of the blue cotton candy and Tori smiles with a soft giggle. However, her eyes never leave her shoes. She knows the second that they do, she will notice just how womanly Jade looks in her leather jacket and her boots, how different she has become from the little girl on the playground that day.
"Why do you do that?" Tori asks, stopping as she leans into the railing, hopping up upon it so that she can face Jade. The other girl looks at her in confusion as she licks her lips with a simple shake of her head.
"Do what?" Jade inquires.
"That," Tori gestures toward her with a warm chuckle, "you always talk about how you like to destroy things and that you are just this monster who walks around terrorizing everything that crosses your path. Why do you do that?" To this, Jade just shrugs, taking another bite from the cotton candy.
"Because that's what I do. I wreck things, Tor. My dad left, Caesar died. My mother hates me. So, it's just easier to say that I destroy things than it is to hear it from my drunken mother every night." Jade replies and Tori shakes her head as she jumps down from the post.
"But you don't destroy anything. You save things. You… you make it better. You saved me that day from Jamie. And you saved me from wallowing in my own self-pity when Jude Thomas broke up with me. You… you're kind of like glue. You hold the pieces of my life together. You don't destroy it. You don't break me. You put me back together." Tori replies, taking a step closer to Jade, a sudden urge of confidence overwhelming her tiny self. The raven haired teenager looks at her curiously as she offers her the giant panda. The Latina smiles at her, tucking the panda under one of her arms as the other wraps around Jade.
"Don't you see, Jade? I love you. Even when you ignore me for months on end to be with your greasy haired boyfriend, I will still love you. You never broke me. Not even for a second." Tori whispers and Jade just stares at her, her emerald eyes widened at the statement.
This time this declaration of love is different than all the rest. This time, it is like the love that Noah had for Allie.
And Tori accepts that, rather Jade does or not.
V.
Tori remembers the very first time that Jade West tells her that she loves her because it is the day that their lives change forever. She can't remember what they were fighting about, perhaps it was about Jade's hostility toward her the past few weeks, or maybe it was the fact that she had been ignored for the past forever and she was getting sick of it.
Whatever the reason may be, Tori had jumped out of Jade's car and began storming down the street in the heaviest rain that had occurred all year. It was the middle of spring, it was humid, it was the end of a drought, a symbolism that Tori would look back on years from now and truly appreciate. The thunder clapped in the sky above her as the lightning danced upon her tear streaked face. She couldn't remember when she started crying, or hell, maybe she hadn't even stopped since she was fourteen years old.
She doesn't even know that Jade is following behind her until her fingers wrap around her wrist and she jerks her around, her emerald eyes glaring into her dark chocolate.
"Are you fucking stupid?! You are going to get pneumonia and die out here, Vega!" Jade yells over the thunder and Tori shakes her head, jerking her arm away from the raven haired girl.
"I'd rather die than get back in that car with you, West!" Tori bellows, her face crumbling as the tears begin to fall down her cheeks once again. Jade shakes her head, her mouth slightly agape, taking a careful step toward the Latina but Tori only takes a step back.
"What did I do to make you fucking hate me? Huh? What did I do that was so awful that made you hate me?" Jade demands and Tori shakes her head with a cry, a sound that just… breaks something inside of Jade, a feeling that she has never quite experienced before.
"I don't hate you, that is absolutely the worst part. And if you think I do, then you don't know anything about me, Jadelyn." Tori cries, turning her back to her. Jade shakes her head as she growls in rhythm with the thunder that booms above her. How did she miss all of this? How did she miss all of these signs? Groaning louder, Jade flicks her fingers through her drenched locks of hair, stepping closer to her friend.
"I do know you, Tori Vega! I know everything about you! I know that your favorite color is red. Your favorite kind of ice cream is Oreo. You love to go to the beach in the middle of summer. You want to live in New York City when you are older. You wish that you knew more about your Latin heritage. You have the best voice of anyone that I have ever heard. I know that you love to sit at home at night and watch endless Netflix. You love to curl up in that button up flannel shirt that I got you. You are insecure about your glasses, even though you are cute as fuck in them. You miss your dad like crazy although you would never admit it. You have the biggest heart of anyone I have ever met and you have never given up on me, not even once," Jade's voice breaks, a sound that causes Tori to turn around and look at the girl.
"I know that I have given you a thousand reasons to walk away from me but you never have. I am a shitty person most of the time, just ask Beck. And I am an even shittier friend. But you never gave up on me, not once. I know that… that…" Jade hiccups a cry, "I know that when I look at you, everything is better. It's like; my world isn't just black anymore. I know that I find your annoying optimism to be cute and the way that you wrinkle your nose when you eat something that you don't like, it's cute. I know that you're the only person who can make my stomach feel like this and you're the only person who can break me."
"Jade." Tori whispers, stepping closer to the raven haired goth and Jade shakes her head, the tears brimming in her eyes as she sucks in a breath.
"I know that you have been my best friend since we were kids. But… but you're not just my friend. You never were, were you, Tori? We were always so much more than that and we were too young to see that. But you saw that. You saw me, you saved me. I know that I need you, more than I have ever needed anyone else in my life. And I know that I would never give one of these stupid speeches in my life and I would normally just tell you to fuck off. But it's you, Tori. It was always you." Jade states, stepping forward as she cups her tanned face in her hands, her eyes staring deeply into hers.
"And most importantly, I know that I love you. And I'm in love with you. I always have been. And it scares the living shit out of—" But Tori's lips cut Jade off. Hands glide through wet hair as bodies discover one another in ways never thought possible, scratching, gripping, and holding on so tightly. Lips devour one another, tongues clash together, and lungs expand as they forget to breathe in the best way possible.
This declaration of love was different.
This kind of love is the endless kind.
And it is the kind of love that Tori Vega has been waiting for her entire life.