Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Obviously.
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This was not the way I wanted to meet Remus Lupin. It was early. Forget that, it was an ungodly hour. My dark hair was mussed, probably resembling some sad bird's nest, and my breath stank like breath tends to do in the morning. I had an excuse for being up this early. I had to pee. I was practically dancing. What the hell was he doing here?
Okay, so maybe I was overreacting, but if he wasn't so darn cute I wouldn't care so much.
I briefly considered ducking back into my room before he noticed me, but frankly, my bladder was telling me that was not an option. So I opted to expose myself, morning breath and all.
"Morning," I murmured, trying not to think about my faded, holey pj's.
Remus must have jumped a foot in the air. Come to think of it, the boy didn't look too good. He was jittery, pale, and had big black bags under his eyes. Was he sick maybe? Well if he was, nighttime walks certainly weren't doing him any good.
"W-what are you doing here?" He blurted.
"Uh," I cringed, "just heading to the bathroom."
"Oh. Right."
And with that awkward exchange, we parted ways. I glanced at the clock before heading back to bed. It was 6:30am, not, I supposed, an entirely ungodly hour, but a good three hours before I wanted to be bothered. Or confronted with random, handsome Gryffindors in the common room.
-
He was there at breakfast too, looking sick. I decided not to notice. It was, after all, none of my business. He was a sixth year, I was a fifth year, we hardly knew each other. I would just, you know, sometimes glance at him in the library and try not to fall into those deep, brooding eyes.
I gasped, and successfully restrained my hand, which had sprung up as if to slap me across the face. I wouldn't blame it. I heartily needed a slap right now.
"Jen!" Kim, my best friend giggled and flopped down next to me. "I had the best time with Alan last night!" I smiled half-heartedly. The girl had gone boy-crazy.
Kim started to go on, and on, about her date last night, twisting her strawberry blond hair, her blue eyes glassing over as the last twelve hours of her life was laid out before me. I knew it'd be safe to zone out, at least for a bit, while she gave me every infinitesimal detail of her personal life. The girl just didn't stop. We would start with the date outfit, move on to what he said about it, where they went (there weren't exactly many options), what they did there, how he had held her hand, and then, the worst subject, the—
"Janet!" I flinched at the sound of my full name. She had caught me, and I hated my full name. The jig was up. I sighed, and was about to apologize for not listening, when she continued, "Janet, the snogging! It was like—the best ever!"
"Mmhm." I replied lazily. She said that about every boy she went out with. I think she felt like she had to now. Alice, another friend, slipped silently down next to me and reached for the waffles. Alice was beautiful; she had rich chocolate colored skin, along with a perfect bone structure, and black hair and eyes that all blended together in the perfect mix of arranged and offbeat. Just sitting next to her made me feel boring. My dark hair, brown eyes (though when the light hit them in just the right way I could fancy them hazel), light skin, and thin frame made me long for her exotic looks.
"Hey," I said, "how's life?"
What I meant was 'save me! Save me!'
She scowled.
"Why don't you ask Jeremy? Oh wait, you can't. He's too busy gawking at Lily Evans."
Silently, I groaned. Did everyone have a love life but me? Alice was going out with Jeremy, though possibly not for much longer. Kim was going out with everyone. I hadn't even had a boyfriend yet.
Well, unless you counted Warren, who I had snogged last Christmas after three days of embarrassingly awkward attempts at flirting. I didn't even count Warren. And if that was snogging, I could safely say I never wanted to do it again. It was horrible, to be frank, and disgusting. It was like he was trying to eat my face. Or possibly suffocate me with his tongue.
"Well, I have to head down to care of magical creatures, so… I'll see you guys around."
I couldn't help but feel like I was losing my friends. Jeremy to Alice, or, as she claimed, Lily, Alice to Jeremy, and Kim to boys. Did no one just want to be friends anymore? Or kids? Apparently I was the only one.
I shuffled off, slightly glum, and lamented how few fifth years had opted to take Care of Magical Creatures. They had had to combine all four classes. That meant Slytherins. Last year it was just Hufflepuffs with the Gryffindors. How I missed those days.
It wasn't until I had gone several feet that I became aware of footsteps behind me. They sped up, jogging through the wet grass. I walked faster, not looking back. I was willing, more than willing, to bet it was Jeremy running up to give me his side of the story. Sandy hair in his eyes, out of breath, robes just big enough to hinder his progress. He would be coming to tell me, of course, how, even though Lily Evans was gorgeous, Alice was the only girl for him. And could I please just pass that along to her? And did I blame him? Lily was hot. It wasn't like he would be mad if he caught Alice starring at Sirius Black. Oh crap. She didn't, did she? Stare at Sirius? Because he was bad news.
"Hey," Called an out of breath voice, "It's not like there's a dementor on your tail. Slow down."
I froze. It was Remus's voice. Remus, not Jeremy, who strolled over to talk to me. I turned around and saw his friends, James, Sirius, and Peter, watching from a distance. Was this a prank? Remus seemed nice enough, but my make-believe Jeremy was right: Sirius was bad news. And James? Ditto. Peter, embarrassingly for him perhaps, was a not. The poor boy was slightly creepy, but that was all he had.
He laughed, sounding nervous,
"Jen, right?" He asked softly. I nodded. And then there was silence.
I smiled, not a pleasant smile, but a how-to-I-escape sort of smile. I waited for him to speak. He didn't.
"Awful weather we're having." I defaulted, then rolled my eyes. Lame.
"Yeah."
Remus had amazing eyes. They were blue and grey, streaks of color shooting like arrows from their borders to his pupils. His very un-dilated pupils. I had read somewhere that a dilated pupil was a good sign, it meant the person was engaged and content. What was he here to talk to me about? It didn't seem like something very pleasant.
I wondered how much time had passed while I was analyzing his eyes…hopefully not too long.
"So," I said eventually, not liking how fluttery my voice sounded, but unable to control it, "I actually have class…"
"Right," he replied, snapping to attention, "Well, I can walk you there."
"Um, okay." Like I was going to refuse. "I'm headed out to Care of Magical Creatures."
We started walking. I kept feeling like there was something he wanted to ask me, or tell me, but he never spoke up.
"There are rumors going around we might get to meet a vampire one day. In class. The one I'm going to." I was trying to force conversation and I knew it. The silence was killing me, but my awkward conversational skills didn't exactly make interacting more bearable. Remus balked.
"Isn't a vampire more of a person than a creature?"
"Yeah, but I mean, I still think it'd be interesting. I want to meet a werewolf to."
There was silence. What was going on here? Was that the prank, just a lame experiment to see how long some younger girl would attempt to keep up a conversation with a hot older boy who was clearly not interested? Huh. I kept talking. Mindless chatter was, unfortunately, my default.
"Because, um, I think…or…I kind of want to work with them someday."
"Werewolves or vampires?" He asked incredulously.
"I don't know. Both? Neither? I just think that we're at, like, a pivotal point in history. There are so many things that could change. It's like human rights. Civil rights. Why should we judge people based on something they can't control?"
He just kept staring. I smiled, shyly now.
"I'm babbling I know."
"No I…I like what you have to say. But I think it's unrealistic. I don't think people are that tolerant of something they view as dangerous."
"Well," I said, reaching the edge of the forbidden forest where the rest of my class was gathered, "I hope you underestimate people."
"I do too."
And then he was gone.