SAiYUKi: The Stupidest Adventure EVER!
Chapter 1: May The Stupidity Begin.
A/N: WHOO! I am Paisley, back for another fanfiction. I usually only write Yu Yu Hakusho, but my friends (Dani and Sydney) spent the night and after watching the full series of Gravitation (and yelling at the crappy ending) we decided that we are going to make fun of SAiYUKi...because it's fun! Don't take any of this seriously. Or your seriousness will be shot away by Zenon's machine gun. MUAH HA HA!!
Disclaimer: We don't own SAiYUKi, that's Kazuya Minakura's deal. If we did, believe us, you'd know! You'd see SAiYUKi porn, sex toys, blow up dolls...etc. Which isn't a bad idea. GOJYO IS MINE!! And yours, for the world to share...*angelic look*
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Merciful Goddess: Wow, it's stuffy up here.
Jiroushin: What are you talking about?
Merciful Goddess: I don't know...hmmm...confusing.
Jiroushin: Umm...I still don't understand why you sent them on an earth- bound path...
Merciful Goddess: Because it's funny when they get splinters in their feet!!!
Jiroushin: What? They wear shoes.
Merciful Goddess: *wiggles her fingers* They're an illusion!!!
Jiroushin: Who hired me for this job?
Merciful Goddess: I bought you off a banana seller back when you were younger, many men were taking advantage of your body and I joined in for a while until I realized maybe in the future you would be asking me STUPID QUESTIONS!
Jiroushin: Did you really? *starts to cry*
Merciful Goddess: Nope. *points at him* SUCKER!!!
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Goku: I'm hungry.
Sanzo: *Rolls his eyes* What the fuck else is new? I swear I'm going to kill you next time you complain.
Gojyo: *Lights his cigarette* You always say that, Sanzo, not once have you even put the gun to some REAL use.
Hakkai: *Sigh*
Sanzo: What is it now?
Gojyo: *Lights another cigarette*
Hakkai: KANAN!!!!!! *starts crying*
Sanzo: Dear god...
Gojyo: He will NEVER get over it. *Lights another cigarette*
Hakkai: *Still crying*
Goku: I'm STILL hungry, guys. I want some meat. *Looks hungrily at Gojyo*
Gojyo: AAH! Don't look at me like that, you sick monkey bastard!
Goku: But I'm hungry. *Whines* *Sticks nicotine patch on Gojyo's forehead*
Gojyo: AHH! Craving...for...nicotine...fading!!! AHH! GET IT OFF!! *scratches at his forehead*
Goku: Ha Ha! Now you have to get me food or I won't take it off! I'm sooo hungry...
Hakkai: *still crying*
Sanzo: Is that really safe that you're crying AND driving?
Gojyo: Must....smoke...anyway! *lights a cigarette*
Goku: *Finds random box of nicotine patches and sticks them all over Gojyo*
Gojyo: You.... bastard...Sanzo, start smoking so I can have some second hand smoke...QUICK!
Sanzo: I think I feel like making you suffer a little while longer.
*Loud bump*
Gojyo: What the nicotine was that??!
Hakkai: I think when I was driving and somebody reminded me of Kanan *breaks into tears again*, I was blinded by the excess water in my system and it blinded my already crappy vision. So I hit a rainbow seeking, talking koala who can fly and seems to be a distant relative of Goku.
Goku: Can we eat it? *drools*
Gojyo: How about we second hand smoke out of the jeep and see what we hit?
Sanzo: Let's dump the body...or shoot it.
Goku: I wanna taste it first!
Hakkai: I wanna name it...Kanan. *starts crying again*
Gojyo: You're going to tobacco a dead koala after your dead girlfriend?
Hakkai: *grabs Gojyo by his shirt* SHE ISN'T DEAD!! She's here in spirit...*continues to cry and looks at the koala, strokes it* Oh Kanan *sniffle* I know you're alright. *hugs the dead koala* I LOVE YOU!!
Gojyo: *cough*THERAPY*cough*
Sanzo: Was that sarcasm?
Gojyo: Nope, I haven't had a cigarette in at least 3 minutes...
Magical Koala: Umm...you bastards hit me!!
Hakkai: KANAN!! YOU'RE ALIVE!! SEE GOJYO!!
Magical Koala: *kicks Hakkai* Get off of me!
Goku: It smells delicious.
Magical Koala: I am not food you monkey bastard!
Gojyo: He hates Goku as much as me.
Magical Koala: Shut up pinky!
Gojyo: That little rainbow bastard!!
Sanzo: *puts his gun to the koala's forehead* Tell us what you want.
Magical Koala: Oh, right! My name is...
Hakkai: IT'S KANAN!! *sulks in the corner*
Magical Koala: NO!! My name is Fullymartinmoo!
Gojyo: I know we'll never call you that...
Goku: Can I eat him now Sanzo?
Sanzo: *pushes the gun on his forehead* WHAT DO YOU WANT!?
Fullymartinmoo: I want you all to go find the magical rainbow. But first, you must learn all of your colors.
Hakkai: But we know them all...*sniffle*
Fullymartinmoo: Nope, I just erased your memory so now you have to re-learn them.
Hakkai: Is re-learn even a word? *sniffle* That word reminds me of Kanan!
Sanzo: It doesn't even sound like--
Hakkai: SHUT UP!
Fullymartinmoo: Now get back in your jeep and search for the colors!
Sanzo: I can't believe I'm listening to a koala, who's probably just another mental image I'm seeing because we smoke too much.
Hakkai: Her...name...is...KANAN!!! *starts twitching*
Gojyo: Poor Hakkai--GOKU, stop eating the koala!
Goku: *Gnaws on koala's arm*
Fullymartinmoo: GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME!
Hakkai: Kanan, my love!! Goku, stop eating her.
Fullymartinmoo: I'm a he. *Starts to bleed excessively*
Gojyo: His blood is---LUNG CANCER---er, every color of the rainbow.
Sanzo: I think he's one of the colors.
Gojyo: Huh?
Fullymartinmoo: *Explodes*
Sanzo: He WAS one of the colors! *Exaggerated gasp*
Gojyo: EGADS! We found red.
Hakkai: Kanan died....again. *Goes into hysterical crying*
Goku: *Continues to gnaw on single arm*
Sanzo: Goku, put that rabit-koala-arm down.
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A/N: Well, that's the end of the first chapter...if you were confused, well, we were too. We have no idea where this plot is going, but it IS hella funny. Time for the disclaimer...again
Disclaimer: We DO own Fullymartinmoo, but not SAiYUKi, believe me, you'd see porn...
Chapter 1: May The Stupidity Begin.
A/N: WHOO! I am Paisley, back for another fanfiction. I usually only write Yu Yu Hakusho, but my friends (Dani and Sydney) spent the night and after watching the full series of Gravitation (and yelling at the crappy ending) we decided that we are going to make fun of SAiYUKi...because it's fun! Don't take any of this seriously. Or your seriousness will be shot away by Zenon's machine gun. MUAH HA HA!!
Disclaimer: We don't own SAiYUKi, that's Kazuya Minakura's deal. If we did, believe us, you'd know! You'd see SAiYUKi porn, sex toys, blow up dolls...etc. Which isn't a bad idea. GOJYO IS MINE!! And yours, for the world to share...*angelic look*
________________________________
Merciful Goddess: Wow, it's stuffy up here.
Jiroushin: What are you talking about?
Merciful Goddess: I don't know...hmmm...confusing.
Jiroushin: Umm...I still don't understand why you sent them on an earth- bound path...
Merciful Goddess: Because it's funny when they get splinters in their feet!!!
Jiroushin: What? They wear shoes.
Merciful Goddess: *wiggles her fingers* They're an illusion!!!
Jiroushin: Who hired me for this job?
Merciful Goddess: I bought you off a banana seller back when you were younger, many men were taking advantage of your body and I joined in for a while until I realized maybe in the future you would be asking me STUPID QUESTIONS!
Jiroushin: Did you really? *starts to cry*
Merciful Goddess: Nope. *points at him* SUCKER!!!
________________________________
Goku: I'm hungry.
Sanzo: *Rolls his eyes* What the fuck else is new? I swear I'm going to kill you next time you complain.
Gojyo: *Lights his cigarette* You always say that, Sanzo, not once have you even put the gun to some REAL use.
Hakkai: *Sigh*
Sanzo: What is it now?
Gojyo: *Lights another cigarette*
Hakkai: KANAN!!!!!! *starts crying*
Sanzo: Dear god...
Gojyo: He will NEVER get over it. *Lights another cigarette*
Hakkai: *Still crying*
Goku: I'm STILL hungry, guys. I want some meat. *Looks hungrily at Gojyo*
Gojyo: AAH! Don't look at me like that, you sick monkey bastard!
Goku: But I'm hungry. *Whines* *Sticks nicotine patch on Gojyo's forehead*
Gojyo: AHH! Craving...for...nicotine...fading!!! AHH! GET IT OFF!! *scratches at his forehead*
Goku: Ha Ha! Now you have to get me food or I won't take it off! I'm sooo hungry...
Hakkai: *still crying*
Sanzo: Is that really safe that you're crying AND driving?
Gojyo: Must....smoke...anyway! *lights a cigarette*
Goku: *Finds random box of nicotine patches and sticks them all over Gojyo*
Gojyo: You.... bastard...Sanzo, start smoking so I can have some second hand smoke...QUICK!
Sanzo: I think I feel like making you suffer a little while longer.
*Loud bump*
Gojyo: What the nicotine was that??!
Hakkai: I think when I was driving and somebody reminded me of Kanan *breaks into tears again*, I was blinded by the excess water in my system and it blinded my already crappy vision. So I hit a rainbow seeking, talking koala who can fly and seems to be a distant relative of Goku.
Goku: Can we eat it? *drools*
Gojyo: How about we second hand smoke out of the jeep and see what we hit?
Sanzo: Let's dump the body...or shoot it.
Goku: I wanna taste it first!
Hakkai: I wanna name it...Kanan. *starts crying again*
Gojyo: You're going to tobacco a dead koala after your dead girlfriend?
Hakkai: *grabs Gojyo by his shirt* SHE ISN'T DEAD!! She's here in spirit...*continues to cry and looks at the koala, strokes it* Oh Kanan *sniffle* I know you're alright. *hugs the dead koala* I LOVE YOU!!
Gojyo: *cough*THERAPY*cough*
Sanzo: Was that sarcasm?
Gojyo: Nope, I haven't had a cigarette in at least 3 minutes...
Magical Koala: Umm...you bastards hit me!!
Hakkai: KANAN!! YOU'RE ALIVE!! SEE GOJYO!!
Magical Koala: *kicks Hakkai* Get off of me!
Goku: It smells delicious.
Magical Koala: I am not food you monkey bastard!
Gojyo: He hates Goku as much as me.
Magical Koala: Shut up pinky!
Gojyo: That little rainbow bastard!!
Sanzo: *puts his gun to the koala's forehead* Tell us what you want.
Magical Koala: Oh, right! My name is...
Hakkai: IT'S KANAN!! *sulks in the corner*
Magical Koala: NO!! My name is Fullymartinmoo!
Gojyo: I know we'll never call you that...
Goku: Can I eat him now Sanzo?
Sanzo: *pushes the gun on his forehead* WHAT DO YOU WANT!?
Fullymartinmoo: I want you all to go find the magical rainbow. But first, you must learn all of your colors.
Hakkai: But we know them all...*sniffle*
Fullymartinmoo: Nope, I just erased your memory so now you have to re-learn them.
Hakkai: Is re-learn even a word? *sniffle* That word reminds me of Kanan!
Sanzo: It doesn't even sound like--
Hakkai: SHUT UP!
Fullymartinmoo: Now get back in your jeep and search for the colors!
Sanzo: I can't believe I'm listening to a koala, who's probably just another mental image I'm seeing because we smoke too much.
Hakkai: Her...name...is...KANAN!!! *starts twitching*
Gojyo: Poor Hakkai--GOKU, stop eating the koala!
Goku: *Gnaws on koala's arm*
Fullymartinmoo: GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME!
Hakkai: Kanan, my love!! Goku, stop eating her.
Fullymartinmoo: I'm a he. *Starts to bleed excessively*
Gojyo: His blood is---LUNG CANCER---er, every color of the rainbow.
Sanzo: I think he's one of the colors.
Gojyo: Huh?
Fullymartinmoo: *Explodes*
Sanzo: He WAS one of the colors! *Exaggerated gasp*
Gojyo: EGADS! We found red.
Hakkai: Kanan died....again. *Goes into hysterical crying*
Goku: *Continues to gnaw on single arm*
Sanzo: Goku, put that rabit-koala-arm down.
________________________________________
A/N: Well, that's the end of the first chapter...if you were confused, well, we were too. We have no idea where this plot is going, but it IS hella funny. Time for the disclaimer...again
Disclaimer: We DO own Fullymartinmoo, but not SAiYUKi, believe me, you'd see porn...