A/N: Yeah…I was bored when I was doing this…so pardon me…this is absolutely, 100% pure stupidity!but i still dedicate this to patty.mwahahhaa.bites pattyi updated at last!
Disclaimer: I don't own SD…how I wish I did…
"Lights…" I, the director said…then the dark stage was lit up…colorful lights coming from the disco thingies all over the place…
"Camera…" the camera and the crew was all set…
"ACTION!!!"
Then there it happened…the most disgusting thing that you will ever see in the history of basketball…the four aces- five in this case-of the prefecture's top schools, dancing, singing and making a fool of themselves…Naismith would want to have their heads on a platter after this performance.
"Wait, wait, wait…something's wrong here…Aces? Then why is Sakuragi Hanamichi there?!"
Producer in chibi form
"The company didn't have much budget for this kind of gimmick…so I decided to snatch Sakuragi and pay him $1 buck…he's so cheap!!! Hahahah! Well…that includes an all-expense date with Haruko-san on November 1 though…that monkey, all for publicity."
The five "aces" were forming a circle they really love basketball…
At the front part was Rukawa…as usual sleep-dancing, sleep-talking, sleep-standing, sleep-singing whatsoever.
Maki Shinichi was on the left side of the so-called basketball formation, wearing an all- white outfit made from the remains of the costume of the leading lady in the movie, "Die pig, die!"
At the right was Sendoh, looking like a perfect replica of a loony hedgehog. He looks as if he's about to poo with that grin of his, hey! What is that yellow thing on his teeth?
"Cut! Cut! Cut!!!" the director commanded. "Sendoh Akira! What is that slimy-grimy thing on your teeth?!"
"Oh this?" Sendoh said, picking his teeth using his leather-gloved hands.
"No!! Don't touch that! The gloves! Stop! Someone give him a toothpick!"
'Oh God, have mercy. I'm going to die young in my age of 80.'
Sendoh picking his teeth, with the use of a toothpick now, "Oh this? I guess this is the banana peeling that I stole from the red head."
"THE WHAT?!"
'This is unbelievable! And they say that these people are the country's greatest basketball players of all time! Banana-peeling-eaters! Goodness gracious!"
"You stole my banana peeling?! Why you!!!" Sakuragi yelled, looking like a bull and running after the red-clad banana-peeling-eater.
"You two, stop." Maki commanded, as calmly as ever but his wrinkles showing.
Sendoh suddenly stopped causing Sakuragi to bump into him. Rolling, rolling, rolling, they landed 1 centimeter from the director.
Doing the sign of the cross the director said, "Stop! Oh saints, help me."
Then suddenly, Rukawa stompd his feet, he must be having a bad dream.
Rolling, rolling, the two crashed on the director's chair sending his hot coffee to the air to……..drumrolls. His newly bought Beret and Polo shirt.
"Strike 2. Another strike and I'm out!" The director said, steam coming out from every pore in his body.
"Nyahahahahaha!" The familiar guffaw… "Director Houjou, you look as if you just came out from a mud bath! Nyahahahaha, on second thought, it really suits you," the red-head baka said now standing and pinching the director's cheeks, nose and the like. "Ooooh…! You taste good!" he said, licking the coffee from the director's beret. green mindeds beware. "What's this? Coffe from Starbuck's? My favorite!"
"WHY YOUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!"
"Why me? Did I guess wrong? Maybe the coffee's from seattle's best? Or from St. Clair's? Oh, I know! This is Nescafe instant blend? Nyahahahaha, why director, I never knew you're such a cheap, cheap person!"
Sweat drops from everyone…
"I'm firing myself from this project!!!" The director shouted, loosing his temper at last.
"Hey director, that a stupid th—" Sakuragi commented, but his 'co-star' Fujima covered his mouth.
"Shhhhh!!!"
"Hey! That's no way to treat the tensai! Nyahahahah!"
Opening the exit door in the studio the director said one last comment, "And you, basketball-headed dimwit, this is not Nescafe! This is cappuccino from St. Ives!"
After the director exited the studio everyone asked themselves, "St. Ives is a brand for cosmetics, right?"
Ahem, ahem. May I continue with my introduction.
At the back part was Fujima Kenji, looking as angelic as ever. Er…is he picking his nose? He and Sendoh must be relatives. sweatdrop.
And at the middle, perfect for the phrase 'center of destruction,' was Sakuragi Hanamichi. Sporting a red and pink polka-dotted shirt, he really is eye-catching.
"Okay! Now, let's all be obedient and follow my instructions." The assistant director started, "Okay, one, two, three, take 2!"
With the disco lights on and the dry ice already put on their rightful places, the most disgusting voices in the world started to sing a parody of Backstreet Boys's Larger than Other Balls entitled Larger than the Court.
Rukawa started sleep-singing with his Elvis-like hand gestures…
I may run and sprint
When you're on other's hands, alright
But let me tell you know
There are prices of fame, alright
All of our time spent in tons and tons of sweat
Sendoh now, singing and grinning from hair to hair…
All you players can't you see, can't you see
How the ball's affecting our reality
Every time we lose
It can make it right
And that makes it larger than other balls
Then Maki, wrinkles visible to the camera…
Looking at spectators
And I see you're body bounce, c'mon
Wishing I could kiss your spherical orange body, c'mon
'Cause all of your bouncing keeps us alive
Fujima sang acting like a real pop star with his jeweled shades, flared pants and everything…
All you players can't you see, can't you see
How the ball's affecting our reality
Every time we lose
It can make it right
And that makes it larger than other balls
All of your bouncing keeps us alive
All together now…
All you players can't you see, can't you see
How the ball's affecting our reality
Every time we lose
It can make it right
And that makes it larger than other balls
Then it's Sakuragi's turn, with that polka-dotted suit he seems as if he couldn't wait for Christmas…
Yeah, evertime we're down
Yeah, the ball can make it right
producer in Chibi form
'If he says 'yeah' again, I swear I'll die.'
YEAH, and that's what makes it larger than other balls, balls, balls, balls, balls with the fading echo effect.
'Shoot. I'm dead.' And the producer dies.
The director looks around wide-eyed, surprised that he's still alive upon witnessing the recording of the world's most destructing song and that everyone in his crew was either sleeping or out of the studio.
While the "Aces of Music" stood on the stage not moving, the director announced, "I guess that's a wrap."
And the recorder exploded.
BOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!
So much for the idea of a band…sigh
I guess that's okay right? Mwahahahahaha. I hope you like it. reviews are very encouraged and so are flames. Hehehe.