A/N: I've literally been planning this fic for months and am unreasonably excited to finally start posting it. Thanks to GhostWriter62 and lovelyMary for letting me bounce ideas off them and pick their brains about plot points and to everyone else that put up with my vague musings. I often say that fanfic is cathartic and this was/is my way of coping with the finale.

This starts immediately after the finale and is completely canon, but with a different interpretation of a few things...which will be further explained in my next author's note. Let me know what you think :) Also, when I wrote this, I was keeping track of the days...for multiple reasons, but mainly so I could get a clearer timeline on things. If anyone is interested in knowing what day it is, let me know and I can include it. And if anyone is wondering, the title comes from a line in a Megadeth song, "Sweating Bullets," but the lyrics really have nothing to do with this other than that one line.

Paige brushed her damp hair back from her face as she ran down the hall towards Mike's hospital room, her wet shoes echoing down the empty hall. Briggs was overreacting. Mike was fine. Well, not fine. But they would fight and he'd throw her out of her hospital room. Because apparently fighting when he was in the hospital was their thing. But Mike was fine. He'd be pissed she turned him in, but he was fine. As soon as she saw that he was okay, she'd leave. She just needed to see him for two seconds. Sid wasn't going to hurt Mike. He was just going to arrest him and place him under police custody. Wasn't he? But what if Briggs was right? What if Sid tried to hurt Mike?

"Paige, what happened with Mike? Huh? What did you do?" Briggs demanded.

"Sid. I gave him the name," Paige confessed, her voice filled with shame and regret. She did the one thing that Mike might not ever be able to forgive her for. But Mike trusted the system. Trusted the guilty would be punished and the innocent would go free. He couldn't hate her forever for using his own logic on him. But as the seconds ticked by, she became less sure of her decision and her anxiety for Mike's safety increased.

All she wanted was for Mike to be arrested. For him to have to pay for what he did. The Mike she knew was gone. He had been for some time. Learning that he forged Lina's letter confirmed her worst fears. Lina was dead and Mike covered up her murder. If Mike was willing to cover up a murder, lie to her and to Lina's family, she didn't know what else he was capable of. Saying that Mike was obsessed with Sid was an understatement. Mike was determined to with pin everything on him. How far was he willing to go? Did Mike have it in him to carry out the bloodbath at the Solano's all so he could pin something on Sid? Mike had nothing to lose. His career was tanking fast and maybe Mike decided to level the playing field by playing just as dirty.

She didn't know anymore. She used to know. But now, now she wasn't sure.

All she needed was to see him with her own eyes and then maybe they could find a way to start working through things. If he was innocent, she'd help him prove it. And if he wasn't, he'd understand why she did what she did. What she didn't understand was why Briggs was so panicked. It was wrong of her to turn Mike over to Sid, she should've handled it better. She should've made Briggs do it. Or done it herself. Maybe it was petty, but she got a sick sense of satisfaction in knowing that the man that arrested Mike was the one Mike would give anything to arrest.

Paige stopped in front of Mike's room and she looked around wondering why there wasn't anyone from the LAPD outside Mike's door. This floor should be crawling with police officers. She was positive Sid would've left to arrest Mike as soon as he got a chance. Maybe Sid wanted to make sure all of his paperwork was in order before arresting him. Or he hadn't believed her that Mike was actually here. Paige shook her head and entered the room, looking around the empty room in confusion. The nurse had told her Room 312. Paige stepped back in the hall to double-check the room number outside the door. 312. A nurse was walking by and Paige stopped her, "Excuse me, is this Mike Richards' room?"

The nurse hesitated for a second before answering, "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry to be the one to have to tell you this, but Mike Richards didn't make it."

Paige stared at the nurse in disbelief, positive she had heard her wrong. "Didn't make it? Didn't make it back from tests? Is he in surgery or police custody?" Mike needed medical attention. Sid had no business taking Mike downtown in his condition.

"Mike Richards coded earlier, we tried to revive him..."

The nurse kept talking but nothing registered. Her eyes filled with tears she shook her head back and forth. "No, no, no," Paige whispered with a shaky breath. "There must be some sort of mistake. Mike isn't dead." Mike couldn't be dead. She just saw him. He was in bad shape, but he was alive when she left him. The nurse was wrong. There had to be some sort of mistake. Or maybe there was another Mike Richards. "Can you check to see if he was moved or if he's in surgery? He's in some trouble, did someone come to arrest him? I'm with the DEA, I want to see his paperwork." Paige reached in her pocket and came up empty handed, remembering that she left her badge at home.

"I'm sorry, but Mike Richards - "

"Stop apologizing! I want to see his paperwork. I don't have my badge, but I swear, I'm a DEA Agent. Can you at least check? See if he's in surgery or if he was moved? Or if he was arrested?" There had to be some sort of explanation. Mike wasn't dead. He couldn't be dead. Wouldn't she know if he was dead? Wouldn't she feel it? Or were things so fractured between that she wouldn't?

The nurse gave her a sad smile, "The Mike Richards I'm talking about had a gunshot wound and problems with his lungs. I was in his room earlier. The time of death was 7:14pm. I'm sorry. Is there someone I can call for you?"

"The time of death was 7:14pm."

Paige felt like she couldn't breathe. Mike was dead. Only he couldn't be dead. She just saw him a few hours ago. He hadn't been in the greatest shape, but he made it to the hospital. He wasn't dead. He couldn't be dead. He wasn't dead.

Mike was a liar. He betrayed her. He broke her heart. She was so furious with him right now. But he wasn't be dead. They had to fix things. Things couldn't end between them like this.

"Miss, I'm sorry. But Mike Richards had lead poisoning. His lungs collapsed. He - "

"He's not dead!" Paige shrieked, drawing the attention from a pair of nurses walking down the hall. But she didn't care if she made a scene. Didn't care if people stared. Whatever it took to get her to see Mike, she'd do it. "I want to see him. I need to see him." There was a mistake. Out of all the aliases Briggs could've chosen, he managed to choose one that had the same injuries as Mike. What were the odds of that happening?

"His body was taken to the morgue. I'm sorry, but without approval, you can't see him."

"Take me to him!"

"Paige?" Briggs asked, rushing towards her.

Paige ran towards Briggs, "Do you have your badge? Show her your badge," Paige demanded. Briggs could fix this. He could get her into see Mike and she would see that it was all a mistake. It would be a different Mike Richards and everything would be fine. Mike would still be angry at her, but they could figure things out later. "She said Mike's dead. He's not dead. He's not dead!" Maybe if she repeated the words enough times, it would make them true. Mike wasn't dead. He wasn't dead. "I want to see him. Show her your badge! Did you hide Mike?" Maybe that was all this was. Briggs was hiding Mike from the police until he could clear his name.

"Paige, kiddo, I need you to calm down. Take a deep breath," Briggs soothingly said. "Release it slowly." He gently placed his hand on her shoulder and her blood ran cold. Paige jerked away from him and her eyes filled with tears.

No.

Paige stepped back and shook her head, refusing to believe Mike was gone. He couldn't be. "Do something!"

"Paige, calm down."

"Calm down? She's saying Mike's dead. How am I supposed to calm down?"

Briggs waved away the nurse and placed his hands on her shoulders. She saw the pain and regret in Briggs' eyes. He had something difficult to tell her. Something she didn't want to hear. There was only one thing he could tell her that would put that look in his eyes.

"I saw him," Briggs quietly said, his voice thick with emotion.

"No..." Paige started to pull away, feeling like her legs were going to give out on her. If Briggs didn't say the words, it wasn't true. "Don't...please. Don't," Paige whimpered. "Don't say it."

Briggs tightened his grip on her shoulders, "I - I walked into the room and the monitors were going off," Briggs said. "Paige, I'm sorry, but he's gone."

"Stop saying that!" Paige cried. "He's not gone. I just saw him."

"Paige, he coded. The doctors did everything they could, but they couldn't save him."

Couldn't save him.

Mike was gone. Really gone. She couldn't imagine a world without Mike. He made mistakes, so many mistakes, but that didn't mean he deserved to die.

Things weren't supposed to play out this way. Sid was supposed to arrest Mike. Mike was supposed to heal. Clear his name if he was innocent about the Solanos. She couldn't make him pay for covering up Lina's death and faking her disappearance, but Sid of all people arresting him was punishment enough.

"So this is the infamous Levi?" Paige called out from the bathroom stall. She heard all about the rookie's nickname and how he was embarrassed about it. She was definitely going to have fun with him. Teasing him. Hazing him. He was cute too. She might even break her own rule about dating housemates and see if he was a good kisser.

"It's Mike."

What the hell happened to the Mike she knew last summer? That nine year old kid with a dream?

"The FBI is the best law enforcers in the world. Every day, they put bad people in prison and protect America. They make sure the President is safe. If there is a crime, the FBI stops it. The most important thing to an FBI agent is truth and justice."

"Mike's family," Paige whispered. "I should call them." He didn't talk about his family much, outside of his grandfather and he was gone. She got the impression that things were strained with his parents, especially his dad. He never mentioned any siblings. But it wasn't like she ever mentioned her brother. But still, how could she not know for sure if Mike had any siblings? How the hell did she live with someone and sleep with him for weeks and not know if he was an only child?"

"I'll take care of notifying Mike's family," Briggs said.

Paige nodded, relieved she wouldn't have to make that call. She didn't want to have to be the one to break their hearts. Paige closed her eyes, feeling guilty for even thinking of herself at a time like this. Mike was gone and all she could do was feel relieved she didn't have to call his parents? What kind of person was she? "I want to see him." She needed to say goodbye. She hadn't gotten a chance to say goodbye. How do you say goodbye to a person that meant everything to you but they betrayed you in the worst way possible? She needed to see him.

Briggs reached for her hand and squeezed it. "Are you sure?"

"It's Mike," Paige whispered. "I - I - I have - "

Briggs wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly as she broke down in his arms. "I know. Tell me what you need."

She needed Mike to be alive. And he wasn't. Everything felt so surreal. Like she was trapped in a bad dream, only as more time passed, she wasn't sure she was ever going to wake up.

Mike wouldn't.

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