**Warning: This fanfiction is strictly parody. It is not intended to be taken seriously, at all.**
Sora plopped face first into the sand.
Ever since returning to Destiny Islands without Kairi, Sora started digging around every beach on every island around the entire world in search for what Sora thought would be a magical portal where Kairi would be found. Since his last adventure, Sora had enough munny to hire construction work done to help with this search…at first. It's been a few months since Sora's return, and lack of knowledge on how contracts work combined with squandering funding on ice cream depleted all chances of an easy dig. Sora, of course, took matters to his own hands…after every shovel he had broke, no less. Lately Sora's hands were aching something fierce, so in order to ease his hands somewhat he resorted to using his head.
"Uh, Sora?" Riku's voice muffled in the sand. "I don't think this'll work."
"Of course it will!" Sora muffled back before plucking himself out of a sand hole. "I have a big head!"
Riku swept his silver hair and shook his head. "That's not how heads work."
Sora stared blankly at Riku as if in complete shock at what his friend just said. This lasted for half a minute until Sora decided to plop his head back into the sand. Riku simply shrugged and started to walk away when suddenly a flash of light appeared behind him. When Riku turned, Sora was gone.
"What the…?"
But before Riku had any more time to respond, the flash of light appeared again and Sora returned with Mario.
"Oh hey Riku!" Sora waved as if nothing happened.
"Wait," Riku tried to make sense of the situation. "You were just gone. And who's that with you?"
"It's-a-me, Mario!"
"It's-a-he, Mario!" Sora repeated.
"Oh, okay…" Riku said, confused.
Mario then proceeded to jump on Riku's head, with leaf in hand, transforming into Raccoon Mario and flying off in the distance.
"Ow, what was that for?!" Riku shouted in pain and annoyance.
"I dunno, but he sure looks happy!" Sora smiled pointing at Mario as he flew away.
As Riku recovered from Mario's feet in his face, he took a closer look at the raccooned plumber. His view became shorter by the second as Mario flew off to destinations unknown. He turned back to Sora.
"So…what now?"
Sora thought about this question for a moment, and then pointed his finger upwards as if having the grandest of ideas.
"The heart is where you'll find it! I just know it!"
"What?!" Riku said, with a very confused chuckle.
And then Sora plopped his head back in the sand.