Okay we're just gonna pretend that George left the castle after Fred died. There might be some OOC-ness just because this is my first HP fic so I'm still learning the ropes here. I hope I did everyone justice. No flames please but I love constructive criticism.
I only own Olivia and anything you don't recognize.
For comfort, for solace, for the end of my broken heart...
-End of Heartache, Killswitch Engage
Just entering the castle, you could feel death in the air. It was so thick, you could choke on it. Walking through the crowd with Harry, Ron and Hermione, I saw people I've know for years laying dead or seriously injured. I felt the razor wire of grief grip my heart and refuse to let go. Then I saw two people that I never wanted to see dead. Remus and Tonks lying side by side, hands almost touching, my heart shattered for their son. But what I saw right beside them chilled me to my core and ripped my soul to shreds. George in his father's arms with heart breaking sobs leaving his lips and Fred lying still on the ground, dead. I dropped to my knees. I felt the lump of grief grow in my throat but no tears would come. I just sat there and stared at the cold, pale corpse of one of my best friends. I had known the Weasley's since birth. The twins and I grew up together, best friends since we were born and now here I was, sitting beside Fred and praying to every god that I knew that it was a dream and he was actually just unconscious. Suddenly I heard my name and looked up at the broken, tear stained face of George Weasley. He pulled me to my feet and held me to him as tightly as he could.
"I'm so relieved to see you alive. I thought I'd lost you too," he whispered brokenly in my ear. I just nodded and kissed his chest. I didn't trust my voice at all.
"I need to see him. I need to say good bye," I whispered as I pried myself from
George's arms, "I'll be right back." I walked over to Fred's side and dropped to my knees again and just broke. Finally the tears came. I smoothed his hair back and kissed his forehead, then his nose, his cheeks and finally his lips. "You were my big brother. You big idiot, you said you'd come back! We need you, George and me. What are we supposed to do without you," I cried at him, knowing I'd never get a response. I sat there in silence just crying and then I kissed his forehead again, "I love you, big brother. I'll never be the same without you but I'll try for George's sake. Watch over us, Freddie." And with that, I got up and went back to George and just held him as he cried. We sat there just lost in grief before Molly came over to us.
"Take George home with you. We already moved his things to your flat. We figured you two would be needing each other for the next while," she said softly with tears leaking from her eyes. I nodded and gave her a hug before apperating to my bedroom. I laid George on my bed and sat next to him, holding his hand.
"What are we gonna do, Olivia," he asked softly.
"I'm gonna go shower and wash this day off and you can stay here and sleep or go make something to eat or if you want you can shower as well in the other bathroom," I suggested. I always deflected when I was hurting. He was quiet for a minute and then he spoke.
"I'll go shower as well. Do you mind if I stay here for a while? I just don't want to go home and face Fred's empty room," he asked.
"Your family already brought all your things here. Mum figured we would need each other for a while," I answered. George looked up at me and then a peculiar expression crossed his face. "George, what is it?"
"Your eyes, they've lost their light," he said simply. Grief gripped my heart once more as I kissed his forehead and then made my way to the bathroom. I looked in the mirror and just as George said, my olive green eyes had dulled. So had my porcelain complexion and raven hair. I looked worse than Fred had when I saw him lying dead on the Hogwarts floor. I turned on the shower to scalding hot. I wanted to burn the remnants of this day out of my skin. I wanted to forget that my best friend was dead and that my other best friend was almost dead with grief because his brother was gone. I stepped into the shower and let the burning water scald my skin. I could barely feel it over the pain and heartbreak though. Standing there thinking about Fred broke me. I collapsed on the shower floor, pulled my knees to my chest and let all my pain tear from my throat in earth shattering howls of despair. Suddenly my shower opened and George stood over me with tears in his eyes and holding a towel. He reached in and shut off the shower and then pulled me to my feet. He dried off my body as I just stood there, sobbing. He then wrapped me in the towel and held me, stroking my hair and telling me that we'd be okay. The guilt bubbled up inside me and I pulled away from him.
"I should be comforting you, not the other way around. I'm sorry, I was being selfish," I whispered sheepishly. George grabbed me and pulled me into another tight hug.
"You lost a brother, too. Fred would want us taking care of each other. He would kick my ass if I even considered being selfish in my sadness. We both loved him and we both spent the last 20 years seeing him everyday and being with him almost all the time. We both need to grieve and we need each other for that. Don't ever feel selfish for being sad," George explained. He was right, but then again he usually was.
"Thanks, Georgie. You always were the more sensitive brother," I said, giggling a bit. But it was too soon, it hurt to laugh. He smiled softly and kissed my forehead.
"Anytime, it's why I'm your best friend. Well, one of them. How about you get dressed and I'll go get us something to eat? Take a nap while I'm gone. You look like you need one," George said.
"Okay, but what about you? You need a nap, too. You must be exhausted. I can go get food," I offered.
"I napped while you were in the shower, Olli. You were in there for a good hour before I came to find you. Then I heard your screams and I figured you needed me."
All I could do was smile. This was why I loved George. He was always there when I needed him even if he was hurting too. Fred was that way too but he would always joke about it. Sometimes, I just needed someone to listen and be sensitive to my problem.
"Actually Georgie, let's just order something in. I think we just need to stay in and mourn tonight. We lost Fred tonight and many others that we knew and cared about. Is that okay with you," I asked. George just nodded and led me back to my room. He looked at all the pictures on my dresser as I picked out a pair of black yoga pants and a sweater that used to be Fred's. It even had an 'F' on it. George turned and smirked at my attire.
"He always wondered where that one got to. I told him that you stole it but he never believed me," George said with a sad tone in his voice, "I never realized how many pictures of the three of us you had. A lot of good times here. Our first Quidditch World Cup together, our own first Quidditch match. We beat Slytherin bad that day," he laughed as he continued down memory lane. I smiled sadly and walked over to him and gave him a hug.
"Let's go look at take out menus, okay," I asked. He nodded and we walked to the kitchen. As we were walking, I smelled something and quickened my pace.
When we got to the kitchen, there was food on the counters and table. As I looked at it all, an envelope caught my eye. It was for George and me. I opened it and read the contents aloud.
Olivia and George,
Today was one of the hardest days you will ever face in your life. I know you two won't feel like doing much of anything the next few months especially not cooking. I decided to drop off a week's worth of food and will continue to do so for as long as it takes you two to get back on your feet somewhat after this tragedy. I love you both very much.
Sincerely,
Mum
P.S. Fred wouldn't want you to mourn for long and I know he's very proud of you both. Just don't abandon the joke shop completely. You need to keep making the world laugh. That's what he'd want.
My eyes welled up with tears once again. After my mother died when I was five, Molly became Mum to me. She always joked that I would have to marry one of the twins just so that she could have me as a daughter in law and the boys would never lose me to a bitchy wife or an possessive husband.
"Any excuse to keep cooking for us and taking care of us, eh," George joked with a shaky voice. I didn't even have to look up to see that he was crying. I hugged him once more before we dug into the food. We spent the night eating, reminiscing, laughing and crying and before we knew it, it was 4am and I was starting to fall asleep in George's lap. "Come on, Olli. Let's go to bed." Suddenly, tears pricked my eyes again. "Oh Olli, don't cry. You were doing so well."
"I'm sorry I just miss him so much. He was always the one to carry me to my room when I fell asleep. I need you both. I don't know how to cope with just you. It was always you two and Bill and me. I feel like I'm drowning," I cried. George started to cry again and continued to hold me, placing soft kisses on my forehead and hair.
"Look at me, Olivia. We are both drowning right now. It hasn't even been 24 hours yet. We need to grieve properly. If you rush through this and try to act brave and like everything's all right, you will make yourself sick. Right now, let's just focus on making it through each day, taking it one hour at a time. It's not wrong to miss him and mourn him and cry for him. Don't ever apologize for that. It's natural, love," he said softly. I kissed his cheek and muttered my thanks before getting up and going back to the kitchen. I heard George's footsteps following me but continued undeterred. I went into the fridge, grabbed my bottle of Fire whiskey and drank a generous amount. When I turned around to offer the bottle to George, he was leaning against the counter with a look of hurt and disappointment on his face. "Olivia, what are you doing?"
"I'm trying to make it go away. I need to numb it for now. It's killing me too much. You're more than welcome to join me though," I offered. He hesitated for a short moment before grabbing the bottle and taking a large swig. We continued drinking for another hour, making it through two and a half bottles in that time. I felt George watching me. "Why are you looking at me like that," I asked.
"Like what?" A signature Weasley twin smirk made its way across his lips.
"Like you have something mischievous in mind that you know I'll object to," I answered knowingly. He walked over to me and got very close to me, inches from my face.
"Do you trust me," he asked quietly. Confused, I nodded. Before I had time to figure out what was happening, his lips were on mine. It took me a moment to respond because of the shock but I felt the pain and sorrow slowly starting to fade and become replaced with a different emotion altogether, although I couldn't quite place it. George pulled away slightly. "Do you feel that? Everything just fading away and nothing hurting anymore?" I no longer trusted my voice so I just nodded hazily. "Do you want me to stop," he asked hesitantly. My eyes flew up to his, an incredulous look coloring my face.
"Never," was all I could get out before his lips attacked mine with more hunger and passion than they had previously. We made out for a good five minutes before he pulled away to discard his shirt. While he was doing so, I noticed we were in the bedroom. I didn't know how we ended up there but I wasn't complaining and I followed his lead, discarding my shirt as well. George stood silently and looked at me for a second.
"Are you sure you're okay with this, Olli? We can stop if you want," he offered sheepishly. I captured his lips in a nerve-searing kiss.
"George, let's just forget and push everything away. We can deal with consequences later," I answered as I quickly performed a contraceptive charm on myself. Then next four hours were spent forgetting everything and just focusing on each other and taking each other's pain away. It was a perfect harmony of lips and teeth and tongues and tears and comfort and lust.
As I woke up hours later, I had no idea where I was. I felt a dead weight on my stomach and discovered it was an arm. I followed the arm to a shoulder, which lead me to the peaceful, sleeping face of George Weasley. I smiled briefly before remembering the events of the previous day and the tears hit me once more. Fred died yesterday. I sat up quickly to wipe my tears, knocking George's arm off me and waking him up. He looked around, confused before his gaze focused on me and he remembered too. Tears pricked his eyes as well as he sat up to wrap his arms around me.
"I can't believe myself," I sobbed loudly, "Not even gone 24 hours and here we are, in bed together. He would be so cross with us, Georgie. How could we do this to him?" George just continued to stroke my hair and kiss my forehead.
"I don't think he'll be too mad at us, love. He's been waiting years for us to do that. He's actually probably up in Heaven chuckling and saying 'About bloody time, you two.' He knows we're grieving and the only way he'll be mad is if you redevelop that drinking problem of yours," George said, laughing softly. I sat silently for a minute before nodding my head because once again he was right.
"I need to think things through. I'm gonna go shower and then I'm going for a walk,"
I said softly. George just nodded and watched me leave. Thirty minutes later found me walking around a park by my house and trying to figure out what I was going to do now that I may have screwed up my relationship with the only best friend I had left. I suppose I still had Bill but he was pretty busy with Fleur these days.
Eventually, I found my way back home. Just before I opened the door I heard George talking to someone. Wondering who was there, I entered and was pleasantly surprised. Standing in my living room was no other than the long ginger-haired Bill Weasley. Seeing George looking past him, he turned to face me and a wide albeit sad smile spread across his face as he opened his arms to me. I ran into them as tears began to roll down my cheeks once again.
"Oh, Bill! I missed you so much! I needed you so badly," I cried as he continued to hold me. He pressed a small kiss to my hair and I felt the warm wetness of his tears splash on my head. I pulled away and looked up at him. "Why are you crying? I'm still here and so is George. We only lost one Weasley yesterday," I said, my voice breaking, "What is it, Bill?" He straightened and wiped his tears before answering.
"I was just so worried about you, Olli. But when Mum told me that you two made it and were holed up here, I apperated immediately. You're my little sister, I had to check for myself," he whispered softly. I kissed his cheek and hugged him again.
"I was worried about you too, Bill." We held each other in silence for a couple minutes before he pulled away.
"I should get back to Fleur, she'll start to worry and she's been under enough stress lately, as have we all," he said and then he kissed my forehead before walking towards the door.
"Bill, wait," I called. I missed him and wanted his comfort for a little longer even if it was selfish to keep him from Fleur. I grabbed his hand and continued, "Why don't you stay here for the night? I miss you and I haven't seen you in months and I just need you." He contemplated for a short moment before agreeing.
"Let me just floo Fleur and let her know. I don't want her to worry," he explained. I smiled softly. He was such a good husband.
"If you want, you can invite her to stay, too. That way she won't worry," I offered, hoping he'd decline it. I liked Fleur, don't get me wrong, her and I were good friends. But tonight, I needed my best friend/ big brother without her around. Thankfully, he did decline.
"Thank you for offering but as you said, I haven't seen you in months and I think I fancy a night with my little brother and my baby sister," he said as that same wide, sad smile crossed his face. I hugged him once more before he went to floo his wife. I was so excited about seeing Bill that I forgot George was still in the room. His voice startled me when he spoke.
"So when are we gonna talk about this," he asked. I turned to look at him, with confusion on my face.
"Talk about what, Georgie," I asked.
"You know what, Olli. Last night, when are we gonna talk about it," he asked again. I thought for a second.
"After Bill leaves. I just want one day with him, George. I haven't seen him in so long. I miss him so much and him getting married only makes that harder," I explained. He looked disappointed but nodded, dropping the subject as Bill entered the room again.
We ate supper and drank and laughed at the good old days when everyone was still alive, when none of us had been scarred by the pains of war. Later on in the evening my fireplace roared to life and Angelina Johnson was standing in my living room. It didn't faze me, Angelina, the twins and I had attended Hogwarts together. But she looked very different than she had the last time I saw her. Her hair looked like she hadn't washed it since the battle at Hogwarts and her once beautiful dark skin was now pale and waxy looking and her cheeks were tear stained. She looked dead. I ran to her and held her.
"Angel, what are you doing here? Are you okay," I asked. In retrospect, I realized how stupid those questions were.
"I need to talk with George," she whispered as she pulled away. She put her hands on my cheeks, "How are you holding up, Olli?" I shrugged and began to cry again. She wrapped her arms around me and I felt Bill's arms wrap around me as well. I pulled out of the embrace.
"George is on the front steps, Angel. Take him for the night, you two need each other right now," I said
"No, Olivia. You need him too," she countered
"I have Bill for the night. I'll be okay. He needs to get out of the house," I replied. She smiled sadly and nodded as she made her way to the front door.
"Why did you do that," Bill asked. I shrugged and kissed his cheek.
"I wanted a nice quiet night with my big brother plus I need to talk to you about something after he leaves," I explained. He wanted to ask questions, I could tell but he left it at that. Then George and Angelina came through the door.
"Angelina invited me to go for a few drinks and stay with her tonight, do you mind, Olli," he asked hollowly.
"No love, I don't mind I have Bill so I'm not alone. Go and try to enjoy yourself, eh," I said, trying to be light for him but it didn't work. He just nodded sullenly and left with Angelina. Bill was on me the moment they left, hounding me with questions.
"What happened there and does it have something to do with what you need to talk about," he asked. My eyes flew to the floor as the grain of the hardwood flooring became very interesting to me. I took a deep breath and decided to get it over with.
"Yes Bill, it does. Something happened and I don't know what to do and it might have been a big mistake," I confessed as the panic rose in my chest.
"Okay, Olivia just calm down and tell me what happened. It can't possibly be that bad, love," Bill said. He was one of my best friends and I loved him but he was rubbish at comforting people in my position.
"Last night George and I were drinking and we ended up having sex," I mumbled quickly. I figured if I got it done quick, it wouldn't be so bad. I was wrong. Bill's eyes were huge. Then he burst out laughing.
"You stupid git, this isn't funny! I completely screwed up and now Fred hates me from the grave and he's going to haunt me," I cried hysterically. He laughed even harder at that. Tears started to sting my eyes. I needed his help and he was laughing and that hurt me. As his laughter died down, he saw my tears and wrapped his arms around me, that stupid smile on his face.
"Oh Olli, I'm not making fun of you. I'm laughing because you actually think Fred will be mad at you for sleeping with George. He waited five years for you two to get together. He tried to force it a couple of times but you were stubborn, especially after dating Oliver," he explained. I had dated Oliver Wood for our last two years at Hogwarts. He had even proposed but I said no because I was beginning to develop less than innocent thoughts about George. I never acted on it because he was never the most celibate guy I knew. I never stood a chance in hell and now I had two people tell me that Fred had wanted George and I together for the last five years.
"So that's why I constantly ended up locked in the shop's storage room with George," I mumbled to myself. Bill chuckled softly. Everything made sense now. Fred had tried multiple harebrained schemes to get us to give into each other.
"Fred and I always thought that sexual tension just clouded around the both of you and that was why you were more drawn to George. You both wanted each other and you still do," he said casually, as if he just told me the time or the weather. There were times that I was surprised at how laid back he could be, this was one of them. What he said made sense though. In retrospect, everything added up.
"True but Bill, I could've just lost my best friend because of that stupid sexual tension! Why did I have to go fall for my best friend and then mess it up when I need him most," I cried. Bill started chuckling again and he was looking past me. "What the hell are you looking at," I asked as I turned around. My blood went cold when I saw who was standing right behind me. One George Weasley who was looking very uncomfortable with a surprised Angelina beside him. There was a thick, awkward silence before Angelina broke it.
"Well I can see you lot are busy so I'll drop by later." And with that, she apperated.
"You two have a lot to talk about, I'm just gonna go home. Olli, I'll stop by again tomorrow. Try to be decent," he chuckled before apperating, the plate I threw missing him. George and I stared at each other in silence.
"Well this is a little awkward," George joked trying to ease the tension. I sent a withering glare his way. "What? Look, Olli, I'm sorry you didn't hear me apperate back and that I heard most of your private conversation with my brother about us having sex! I'm sorry that you were so embarrassed about it that you couldn't even talk to me about it!" I felt pretty horrible after hearing that. I never wanted him to feel that way.
"I wasn't embarrassed about it. I was scared and I had no fucking clue what to do. That's why I talked to Bill before you," I muttered, "Were you embarrassed about it?" George chuckled and shook his head as he wrapped his arms around me.
"Best I ever had," he admitted. I looked up at him.
"Really," I asked, disbelief coloring my voice.
"Of course It's always best when you love the person," he answered as he focused on the wall behind me. I reached up and pulled his face down so that we were eye to eye.
"At least you confessed willingly. I didn't have a choice when you heard it. But I'm kind of glad you did cause then I didn't have to get the courage to do it, it just happened," I countered. He smiled softly and nodded. George leaned down and pressed a small kiss to my lips.
"I really hope you'll let me continue to kiss you from now because otherwise life is going to get quite awkward for us," he chuckled. I laughed a real laugh for the first time since the battle and nodded before leaning in to kiss him again.
In the shadows stood the spirit of Fred Weasley smiling knowingly as he watch his brother and his best friend kiss. He could feel them letting him go. Everyone else had but Olivia and George. As he faded away he whispered, "About bloody time, you two."
I felt a shiver go down my spine, like someone had touched me. But George's hands weren't on my back. I pulled away and turned to look into the shadows. I heard the ghost of a laugh and peace settled within me, making me smile.
"What is it love," George asked as I turned back to him. He looked confused at the smile on my face.
"Nothing. Nothing at all," I answered. I knew whose laugh it was and I was glad to know that he was happy wherever he was. Goodbye Freddie, I thought as George pressed his lips to mine once again.
So there it is! I hope you enjoyed and I'd love if you reviewed to tell me how I did. This was hard to write because I totally hate that Fred died. I cried writing the beginning. I was originally gonna have Bill and Fleur at the end instead of Fred but I felt Olivia needed her closure with him. Probably gonna write a sequel to this so that George gets his closure too.