Well! Here is a one-shot that NinjaGrapeTurtle and myself collaborated on. I must say it was a joy writing.
The Hawk's Small Problem
Clint had very few fears. He could stand up against evil alien races and be as brave as a hawk. The one thing he had always hated, was flying in a plane. He could be fine with Iron Man picking him up or Hulk tossing him through the air, but he could not stand the small cramped air of a cockpit in a plane.
He had learned to deal with this problem by popping a sleeping pill in and passing out for long journeys. Normally, he would have his own pills that he would bring along. For this one instance, an emergency had come up that forced him and the other Avengers to travel to Bora Bora. This meant he had to go on the flight with out the medication.
He paced back and forth as his nerves took over. Steve looked at the hawk with concern.
"Are you alright Clint?" The captain asked, concerned.
"Do you happen to have any sleeping pills on you?" Clint questioned, fiddling his fingers.
Steve gave him a confused look before responding, "I don't have any-" He was cut off as Clint went to the next Avenger, Bruce and asked him the same question.
A smile played across Bruce's lips, "No. The last time I took sleeping pills... it didn't end well." Clint cursed before grabbing Natasha by the arm.
"Please tell me you have some sleeping pills." Natasha, knowing his phobia smirked before saying,"Nope!"She rose both her shoulders as she said this.
Clint turned to the god of thunder desperately questioned, "Do you know of something that can help me sleep!"
Thor looked at Clint with understanding, "I do have moments when I would love to sleep as well, but we must remember that it is not the answer you should seek. Odin has been known to sleep for centuries, and knowing you humans, that would not end well for you."
"Why am I even talking to you?" Clint yelled getting even more agitated.
Clint looked over at the last 2 people that would be boarding the plane. Loki and Tony seemed to be digging through one of the many bags.
"What are you up to!" He yelled at the two.
Tony and Loki turned around. "Nothing! But we found you some sleeping pills!" Tony said enthusiastic, holding up a small blue pill.
Clint took the pill in his hand with his ninja like reflexes, swallowing it without water.
Tony gave a small chuckle. Clint narrowed his eyes. "What?"
"Tony just thought it to be quite humorous to learn of your fear of flying. After all are you not a hawk?" Loki replied a smirk on his pale lips.
Clint scoffed at the god, about to yell at him before being interrupted by Fury.
"We need to get this show on the road! Everyone on the plane!" Fury growled out at the Avengers.
Each one entered the plane and took a seat. Tony and Loki rushed to the front of the cockpit, then Steve decided to sit next to Clint in the second row, trying to help him through his fear. After then it was Natasha and Bruce, and finally Thor and Fury.
The first couple of minutes on the plane went smoothly. Clint tried to get some shut eye waiting for the medicine to kick in.
He kept hearing the two in front of him snicker quietly. He looked at them through one open eye, as they looked back only to giggle some more.
It was around this time Clint started to feel a bit... odd. He did not feel sleepy at all. As a matter of fact, he seemed more wide awake then ever.
He squirmed around a bit trying to find a comfortable position, only to find, nothing was working. Clint shortly felt his pants get a bit to tight. That was most definitely not normal. He glanced down only to snapped his head back up.
He looked forward and found the god of mischief and Tony Stark laughing subtly in their seats.
Meanwhile it was nice and relaxed in the back of the plane when a horrible scream sounded out of the Hawk saying, "I am going to kill you both."
Clint lunged forward about to strangle one of his two deceivers. Steve shot up and took hold of Clint, trying to calm the man.
Loki and Tony, no longer hiding their laughter, tried to get away from the madman.
Fury jumped out of his seat and headed towards the front. "What the hell did you two do this time."
"Why do you always automatically assume it is us?" Tony asked having a hard time to contain his laughter.
"... He is trying to kill you both." Fury said, his one good trained on the trickster.
"Well he should not have trusted us from the beginning. It is not our fault." Loki gave them an innocent shrug.
"I am goin-" Clint started to say before kneeling over. "I - I need to sit down." He reached for the armrest to steady himself as he sat down.
Steve looked down at the am with much concern. "Is there anything I can help you with?"
"Kill them... and bring me some ice." Clint said trying to catch his breath now.
Steve raised an eyebrow at the request and went to get some ice.
"What happened?" Natasha questioned in a stern voice, sending Loki and Tony a withering glare.
"Ask them." he said hoarsely pointing at the two laughing avengers with a menacing look.
"Well?" Bruce stared at the two in disapproving way. He pinched the bridge of his nose. A headache starting to form.
Steve then returned with a pack of ice handing it to Clint. Clint placed the pack on his precious area, trying to turn away out of embarrassment.
"I might have switched his sleeping pills with something else -" Tony answered being interpreted by his partner in crime.
"With something you humans call Viagra." Loki finished.
Steve's face paled drastically, "What were you doing going through my bag."
An awkward silence passed over the Avengers.
"What are you doing with Viagra?" Tony and Clint asked simultaneously. One of them humorously, the other venomously.
More silence followed after.
"I think we are missing the real point here." Steve said trying to get their focus off of him.
Thor looked down at "wounded" man, "Do not fret, my father one time-"
"I do not care about your stories right now." Clint snapped at them god.
Bruce sighed before walking up and kneeling before Clint, his doctor side coming out. "You are going to need keep that ice on for the rest of the flight. When we land I will give you more instructions." Bruce patted Clint on the hand.
"Ok." Clint manged to get out. "Can I still kill them first?" He gave the Doctor a pleading look.
"No one is killing anyone," "WHAT" "-until after the mission." Fury rolled his eye at the toddlers.
"That is so not fair!" Tony gripped back at the same time Loki said, "No mortal could kill me."
"Not until I tell father!" Thor replied in a sing-song voice to Loki.
"You wouldn't" Loki grounded out.
"I most certainly would. Excpetially after that other prank-" Thor stated.
"He does not need to know of that one either." Loki interpreted his brother.
"I shall inform him of both." The god glared at each other.
Natasha nudges both Tony and Bruce, "We have 3 hours left of this flight... Want to take bets on whose going to win?"
"Of course Loki is going to to win! Thor is way to sentimental." Tony gave her a cocky smile.
Nat rolled her eyes at Tony, "You only say that cause he is your sex budy."
Tony's grin fell, mouth agape. "What are you are you talking about?"
Brue chimed in, "It is really not that hard to realize," offhandedly he says, "You guys are so loud."
"We are not!" Tony yelled at Bruce.
"The only one that doesn't know is Thor, and that is only because he can be as dense as a brick." Bruce replied.
Clint gave out a little chuckle at Tony's misfortune.
Tony spun around quickly, "Glad to see you feeling better!" He snapped at the marksman.
"Serves you right." Clint stuck his tongue at the mechanic.
"At least I can stand up straight." Tony shot back.
"Why don't you come here and say that to my face? You know I can kick your ass while your not in that damn suit." Clint glared attempting to sit up.
Fury, Bruce, Steve, and Natasha stared at each other in despair, "This is going to be a long flight." Steve said.
So there you have it! This is actually based off events that happened to Jeremy just recently ( www. people/article/0,,20615617,00 .html) I seriously feel kinda bad for him, but I still have to laugh at it!