Disclaimer: Frasier characters aren't mine.
A/N: Set during season 10 episode "We Two Kings." Contains borrowed dialogue from the episodes. This story is more on the cutesy/adorable side, but hey, Alice is five by this season, and I love writing stories with her in them. Many thanks to crazysockmonkeys for beta-reading!
…
A Christmas Favor
December 21
Café Nervosa, 8:00 am
"Oh hey, Roz! Can I joy you?" Frasier asked his producer as he walked into Café Nervosa. Frasier found himself immediately embraced by the warmth of the small coffee shop, and although he did have to get going, the desire to escape the winter chill outside tempted him to sit down and shed his leather gloves as he ordered a latte to go from a waiter wearing ridiculous reindeer antlers. Normally it wouldn't be in Frasier's interest to tip someone for wearing something so whimsical. But in the spirit of the Christmas holiday, why not?
"Let a thousand antlers bloom," he said to Roz as he laid down a few extra dollars on the table for the waiter. His smile turned into a surprised chuckle as his friend sighed in relief and removed her tan coat to reveal an even more ridiculous elf costume, complete with red-and-white striped stockings and a pair of elf shoes that curled inward.
"I'm working Santa's toy drive at the mall as an elf!" Roz explained as Frasier continued to laugh.
"Roz, if you needed extra money, you should have come to me. I have plenty of odd jobs around the house."
"No, Frasier, it's not about the money." She insisted. "Visiting Santa Claus was one of my favorite memories of when I was a kid. When I was seven, my parents took me to see Santa. They were going through their divorce at the time, so they were hardly speaking. Well, I sat on his lap and I started to cry. And he was so nice, and just…made me feel so safe, and special. And if I could do that for even one kid, well, it's worth it."
Frasier sobered and apologized for laughing at her as she took a delicate sip from her coffee cup and swallowed.
"You know, Frasier, the Santa character also means a lot to me because of Alice. I took her to see him the other day, and the look on her face when she was with him," Roz sighed and smiled to herself, "reminded me so much of my childhood days."
Frasier smiled and reached out to pat Roz's hand. "You're a good woman, Roz. And an even better mother. I'll bet Alice is looking forward to Santa stopping by on Christmas Eve?"
"It's all she's talked about for the past week. And by the way, that reminds me. I have a favor to ask."
"What is it, Roz?"
She hesitated for a moment, recalling his earlier comment on kitschy outfits. "Well, as you know, Alice is five now. And, well, do you think you could play 'Santa' for her this Christmas?"
"What do you mean, Roz? You said she already went to see him."
"Yes, I know, but I was wondering if you wouldn't mind coming over on Christmas Eve when she's asleep to lay out her gifts under our tree? I would do it myself, but every year she gets older, and with it comes her ability to stay awake longer when she wants to. Last year I almost got caught laying out the gifts! If you could do it this year, maybe I could just stay with her in her room and she'd be more likely to fall asleep."
"Roz," Frasier gulped. "Will I have to wear a Santa suit?" She could tell he was doing his best to conceal a grimace.
"Think of Alice. I'll give you the gifts and the spare key to my apartment. You can come over, lay them out and be gone in five minutes. If Alice were to come out I'd rather she see you as Santa. Better safe than sorry. And besides, you said let a thousand antlers bloom. Why not a thousand beards and red suits? Pleeeease?"
The vision in his mind's eye of little Alice in her pajamas and pigtails, eagerly twitching in anticipation of Santa's arrival with her gifts, was enough to make him give in.
"Oh. Alright Roz."
"Oh, thank you Frasier!" Roz exclaimed as she made her way over to his side of the table and hugged him. "I'll see you. And I better get going to the toy drive before I'm late."
Frasier waved her goodbye and turned around to order himself a scone before making his own way back out to the chilly streets of Seattle.
….
December 22
Santa's Toy Drive
"Don't worry Margie, you don't need a chimney. Santa always finds a way in. You have a merry Christmas."
Frasier smiled as he walked into the toy drive where "Santa" and his "elves", one of them being Roz, tended to children eager to share their Christmas wishes.
"Roz, hello!" He quietly called to get her attention.
"Hi, Frasier. Listen, when I'm at the North Pole, my name is Snowflake. And I'm glad you're here, because I have the spare key to my apartment for you." She reached into the pocket of her elf outfit and pulled out the small brass object.
"I'll trade you. I'll take that. And you take this." He passed her a small gift adorned in a red bow and wrapping. "I was in the mall, and I thought I'd make a small donation to the toy drive."
"Thank you! And thanks again for coming doing this for Alice."
"Of course, Roz. Say, she's in school at the moment, right?"
"Uh-huh," Roz affirmed.
"Maybe I should sneak the gifts out of your apartment now. If they're with me, there's no chance she'll snoop around for them. I can bring them back into your apartment on Christmas Eve."
"I like that idea, Frasier. They're in the closet, in my bedroom-"
"Ho, ho, ho, Santa needs his favorite helper!" The Santa Claus behind them called, bringing an abrupt halt to their conversation and Roz's hands flew to straighten her elf hat.
"Well, Santa's calling, Frasier. He needs his favorite helper and I better go before Twinkle over there beats me to it." she jerked her head to indicate the other young girl in a similar elf costume guiding a child toward the exit of the toy drive.
Frasier stared at her as though he could see straight through her. "What's this? Do I sense a little interoffice romance here in Santa's work shop?"
"Well, I wouldn't mind," she responded in a soft, low voice. "To be honest, I haven't even seen the guy out of his costume. But based on those eyes, I would say there's some potential."
"Well, I'll let you go then, Roz."
Frasier smiled as he walked away. Indeed he knew her too well. And as he left the mall he couldn't help wondering how long it would take for his producer to find something wrong with Mr. Claus once she got to meet the real person beneath the red suit and the white beard. And if she hadn't asked him out by the time he saw her next, he would simply have to ask her if she was experiencing "low elf esteem". He couldn't wait!
…
December 24
Roz's apartment, 8:30 pm
"Mommy. Mommy!" A hushed voice and gentle prodding of fingers awoke Roz from her sleep. She opened the eyes in the darkness of her room and saw could just barely make out her daughter's silhouette.
"Hey, you," she whispered back. "You're supposed to be asleep. Santa's on his way."
"I'm too excited though!" She replied. "Can I stay with you?"
"Sure, Alice." Roz lifted her up to the bed and tucked her under the comforter by her side. She gently cocooned Alice and held her close, focusing on her breathing, hoping that the sooner she relaxed, the sooner she would fall asleep. By 10:30, Alice's breathing had evened out and she hoped that meant she was asleep. Frasier was likely to arrive any minute. She kissed her daughter's cheek and closed her eyes, pretending to be asleep.
…
Roz's apartment, 11:15 pm
Frasier was exhausted. After arguing with Niles for the past several days over who would get to host Christmas at whose house, the two ended up agreeing to spend it at the police station with Martin, who declared that he would be working on Christmas day. That agreement led to a hassling endeavor of switching out the family gifts with the heavy prop gifts nestled under the decorated Christmas tree at the station. And then there was this. He wished he had coordinated a time with Roz for him to come over. And he certainly dare not call her now, for if Alice was asleep, she would most certainly wake up.
Quietly he approached her door, clad in the suit and beard the Santa from the toy drive had worn. Roz had taken advantage of her access to the dressing room to sneak it out for him to wear. He inserted the spare key into the lock and entered. The boots he wore were loud and heavy against the hard hallway of the apartment complex, making Frasier grateful that Roz's place had carpeting. He made his way towards her tree, which was twinkling with white lights, ornaments, and silver garland. Gently, he laid down the bag of gifts Roz had given him, and laid them out under the tree one-by-one.
….
The sounds of quiet rustling signaled to Roz that Frasier was here. She turned her ear to listen to the unmistakable sounds of wrapping paper and bows crinkling, of lower branches of the tree bobbing up and down as they gently collide Frasier's oversized sleeves. Gingerly, she turned to look at Alice, who appeared undisturbed by the soft motions outside the room. She kissed her again and carefully removed herself from the bed and closed her door.
"Hey, Frasier," she whispered as she walked out into her living room.
"Hi Roz. I'm almost done," he greeted as he pulled out the last few gifts from the bag. "There!" he whispered as he completed his favor.
Roz smiled gratefully. "Thanks so much for doing this. It means a lot to me."
"Anytime, Roz."
"Well, I better let you go home and get some rest. Are you and Niles both hosting Christmas tomorrow?"
"Actually, Roz, we're spending it with our Dad. He's working all day tomorrow, and we'd like to bring the celebration to his work. Daphne helped us switch out gifts tonight."
Roz frowned a little. "That's a shame Martin is working. Look, how about Alice and I stop by for a visit tomorrow then?"
"That's sounds great Roz! We'll see you tomorrow, then." Frasier leaned over to give her a friendly kiss on the cheek. He was just about to bid her goodnight when—
"Santa?!" came a young voice from behind. Immediately, Roz's eyes squeezed shut and she subtly shook her head. Frasier was in mild shock. He had almost made it out. He nodded as Roz mouthed the words "play along," before forcing a smile.
"Alice, look who's here!"
"Merry Christmas, Alice!" Frasier awkwardly improvised in his best mock Santa voice. The little girl hurried to him and hugged him, and he got down on his knees to give her a better hug.
"So I was good this year?" She suddenly asked as she shifted her gaze to the gifts she had yet to see, and then back to him.
"You were," Frasier paused as he almost let his own voice come through. "You've been wonderful all year."
"Thank you for coming, Santa! You know, for a second, you sounded like Uncle Frasier."
"Ho ho ho, did I? I passed over him tonight. He's sound asleep right now."
Alice looked back at him inquisitively. "How come? Isn't he excited to see you too?"
"Maybe, but your Uncle Marty has to work tomorrow, and he has to be up early to bring Christmas cheer to him tomorrow."
"What?! How come Uncle Martin has to work? No one should have to!" Frasier paused as an awkward silence settled over them. He wanted to encourage Alice to go to bed, or say he had more houses to visit. Something, anything, to avoid getting caught. But then Alice's face head snapped up, as if a light bulb had gone off in her head.
"Maybe for Christmas, you give Uncle Martin the day off!" Frasier couldn't help but chuckle.
"Well, sometimes people have to work on the holidays. That's a tall order, but you what, I'll try? How does that sound? How about you give me a hug and let me get going so I'll see what I can do. Plus, I have more places to visit."
Thankfully, Alice nodded and complied, giving him one last hug. "Merry Christmas, Santa."
"Merry Christmas to you too, Alice." For the sake of show, Frasier grabbed the now empty bag that held her gifts, and carried it with him as he walked out the door, waving goodbye to Alice once more.
An hour later, Alice, whose excitement was wearing off a little thanks to the late hour, was on the verge of sleep again, cuddled next to her mother. Roz stared down at her and kissed her again, grateful that everything worked out tonight.
"Hey Alice," she whispered. "If Uncle Marty still has to work tomorrow, we'll go and visit him with Frasier, Niles, and Daphne. We'll call them in the morning okay?"
"Okay," she mumbled. "Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"Santa kissed you tonight. Does that mean you're dating him now?"
Roz couldn't help but laugh. "No Alice, we're not dating." She quickly changed the subject. "Go to sleep now. The sooner you do, the sooner it will be Christmas day." At last Alice closed her eyes, and then Roz closed her own, intending to fall asleep for real this time.
….
Seattle Police Station,
7:30 am Christmas Morning
Frasier sighed as Daphne continued to knock at the glass doors of the Seattle police station, hoping that just maybe someone from the inside would come walking up to them and open the door. Their efforts to bring Christmas to Martin's work had been a bust, especially since it turned out Martin didn't have to work after all. That was nice, of course, but with no key to the building, the Crane family gift exchange would have to wait until tomorrow.
They started to head back to their cars when Frasier's cell phone began to ring.
"Hello?" he greeted.
"Hi Frasier! It's me."
"Oh, Roz, good morning! Merry Christmas!"
"Merry Christmas to you, too, Frasier. Hey, are you with Martin right now? I wanted to know if we could come over."
"Um, as a matter of fact I am Roz. But we're all heading back to my place right now. Get this, my dad doesn't have to work today."
"No way! Frasier, are you serious?"
"I jest not."
"Wait, then, why are you at the station in the first place?"
"Well, Roz, if you'll remember, all of our gifts are there. And we're locked out."
He could almost hear her smile diminish a little on the other end. "Oh, yeah. Gee I'm sorry about that."
"It's okay Roz."
"What are you doing for the rest of the day?"
"Well, much like this morning's events, the Cranes don't really have any plans in place. I guess anything we do today is going to be impromptu."
"In that case, Frasier, why don't the four of you come over and spend Christmas with us? Alice is just itching to open her gifts, and we'd both love to have you over. Also, to learn that her Uncle Martin actually doesn't have to work today…that's going to be the cherry on top of her story that she got to talk to Santa last night."
"Roz, that's a lovely idea! We'd love that! We'll see you soon."
"Alright Frasier!" she said just before hanging up.
Frasier ended the phone call and looked up at his family, who had been listening to his phone call. "Hey everybody, how do you all feel about spending Christmas at Roz's?"
"I think that's a lovely idea!" Daphne chirped. "Niles and I have dishes and desserts we prepared. We can go get them and bring them to her place."
"And I have a six-pack of beer. Roz and I can share!" Martin jumped in.
And then Frasier: "And I have that Hungarian goose and wassail!"
The gifts forgotten, the Cranes each made their way to their respective homes to retrieve beverages and dishes to contribute for the gathering at Roz's apartment.
It stunned Frasier to think that just a few days ago, he, Niles, and Daphne were getting nowhere in planning their Christmas, because at every turn there was a disagreement regarding when and where the holiday would be celebrated. But now, thanks to an unexpected invitation to spend Christmas with a dear friend, and the equally unexpected granting of Alice's last minute Christmas wish for Martin, today's celebration of Christmas would probably be one of his most memorable yet.