Currents IV: Surrender

Title: Currents IV: Surrender
Author: Gillian Taylor
Category/Rating: Romance / PG (For now)
Characters: Leia/Han
Warnings: Leia loves Han. Han loves Leia *sniff* (though this is only
when he hasn't met me ;-))
Summary: "It's easy to be strong I've done it for so long/
But this time I have to remember/ This time to get what I want/ I have
to surrender" - From Ty Herndon's "Have to Surrender"

Disclaimer: My name is George Lucas. I created it all, I tell you! It
all! MUAHAHAHA! Bow before me all ye little people! *clears throat*
Sorry, Dr. Pepper talking there. Actually, I'm just a poor college
student who's doing this stuff for fun and for her own perverted
enjoyment.

Author's Notes: Part IV in a series devoted to the start of the
Han/Leia relationship.

TIMELINE: This takes place about a week after Currents I & II.

Place: Thermia, Klatuu Nebula (too much Galaxy Quest on my part).
Current location of the Rebel forces between ANH and ESB.

Special Thanks and Chocolate Covered Jedi to my beta, Crysta.

Feedback: I like mail. Any mail. usstrustno1@hotmail.com

----

"Currents IV: Surrender"
by Gillian Taylor

Time.

She could see it crossing before her in the soft interplay of sunlight
on the forest floor, in the breaths that left her body, and in the
constant movement of the Rebellion compound. It sang to her of blood
and sweat, of pain and death, of love and love lost. It spoke of
history, history of the Thermians and history of the Galactic Empire.
But most of all, it told her of her personal history.

Leia Organa had always fought for what she wanted. Even as a child,
though a princess of Alderaan, she needed to struggle in her eyes to
pass muster for her father. She believed that the strongest survived,
following blindly to the tugs of her instincts. Climb, fight, stand,
love, hate. She believed in their power, and in their power to move
the world for her. The strong survive.

Not anymore.

In the flow time, things move with the eddies and currents. Nothing is
the same, and everything changes. She had let herself go with the
movement, but she was still scared. Scared of the truth that she saw
in his eyes and of the pull of her instincts for the first time in her
life.

She was in love. Madly, deeply, head-over-heels in love. Part of her
knew that she would have to stop being the strong one, but the other
rallied against the loss of something that had always come so easily to
her. She had to surrender, give in to the love that she felt and give
up the strength that had been her greatest advantage and her greatest
failing.

She didn't know if she could.

Leia released a sigh into the wind and leaned against the side of the
massive bay doors to stare, unseeing, into the Thermian wilderness.
The only path that she could take, the only one that mattered, was the
one that led straight to him. She had to tell him exactly what lay in
her heart and hope that it was returned.

To let herself go, she had to leave herself open to hurt.

"Hey," a voice said from beside her.

"Hey," she returned, a slight tremor in her voice when she realized who
it was. It was time.

"It's uh...a nice day out," Han Solo said rather nervously. But Leia
didn't notice any difference in his voice, she was too aware of his
presence.

"Yes, it is," she responded, studiously looking into the woods rather
than turning towards him. If she did, she knew she would run.

After an uncomfortable silence, Han was the first to speak, "Leia..."

"Han..." she said at the same time. The looked at each other and
laughed nervously.

Han gestured for her to speak what was on her mind, something that she
needed to do before she lost her nerve. "What if I told you exactly
how I was feeling now, at this moment, about us? What would you say?"
Leia asked him, her voice barely above the threshold of hearing.

"That I hope its exactly what I'm feeling...that whatever it is, I'd
love you no matter what."

Leia bit back a choked sob at his words. It couldn't be. He couldn't
be saying what she had thought she had heard. "You...you love me?"

"Always, in every way," Han told her gently, wiping away a tear that
had escaped her eye with a tender touch.

'I have to surrender,' she told herself firmly and looked into his
eyes, "I love you too."

Time seemed to stop as for a split second the world revolved around the
two of them. In each other's eyes they could see exactly what they had
been looking for all of their lives. Life had been empty before they
had each other, but now...now it would be full for the rest of time.

There were no sudden claps of thunder with that admission. Nor were
there flocks of birds that suddenly took flight or stars suddenly
bursting into blazing glory in the heavens. There were tears,
kisses, hugs, and touches. There were whispered declarations of love
everlasting and the overwhelming sense of never being alone again. But
most of all, there was relief. It was a relief born of lifting a heavy
weight off of their chests, a relief born of speaking the truth to each
other. It was pure, it was light, it was love.

They had surrendered...to life and to love.

END

-----------------

"Have to Surrender"
by Ty Herndon

All of my life I've fought hard for things
that I have want-ed
Caught up and blindly believing the strongest survive
But here in your eyes I see everything
I ever dreamed of and I am afraid
If I rush in if I move to fast I just might
frightened my one chance away

It's easy to be strong I've done it for so long
But this time I have to remember
This time to get what I want I have to surrender

Here I stand helplessly willing and waiting for your love
When want became need, my heart had no choice at all-ll
What will you do now it's up to you now
It's so hard to wait but I will
God give me wisdom God give me strength
And the courage to simply stand still

It's easy to be strong I've done it for so long
But this time I have to remember
This time to get what I want I have to surrender

Here I am take me Somehow you save me
From a lifetime of not being all love can make me.

It's easy to be strong I've done it for so long
But this time I have to remember
This time to get what I want
This time I have to be tender
This time to get what I need
I have to surrender

******
Comments, flames, and pleas for me to return to the rock that
I came from should be sent to me personally. I like mail.
Any mail. Good, bad, mediocre...

usstrustno1@hotmail.com