"Wasn't that great, Goldenpaw? I caught a huge squirrel!" Mothpaw's words come floating to me.
I snap out of my daze and looked at Mothpaw. "Uh...right. Hey, do you want to share a rabbit? You know, eat together?" And only us?
"Sure! But can we invite Flowerpaw, too?" Mothpaw's hopeful golden eyes glimmer.
Never knowing that those words struck me like a sharp blow to the head.
"Of course. She's our friend." As Mothpaw squealed and bounded away to find her friend, I sigh and slump against a tree trunk. This had been going on for a while. Mothpaw and I had been friends since kithood-sharing secrets, gossiping, and enjoying our time together. But this all changed when Flowerpaw came into the picture.
We were good friends, certainly, but we were just that. Nothing else. But the day she asked if she could hang out with us was the day that my life changed. Mothpaw was charmed by Flowerpaw's friendly and outgoing personality and every day after that it felt like I was losing my best friend.
Day after day.
Moon after moon.
Now it was just one quarter-moon until our warrior ceremonies were due. I was working harder than ever, hoping to earn a good name and not get something like Goldenfoot, which has no imagination, or Goldenclaw, since that just didn't make sense.
Today we were doing our assessments. I think I did well, having caught three mice and two squirrels. I had almost gotten a rabbit, but at the last moment cracked a twig and the rabbit went off. Vroom.
Just like my friendship. Zooming off at the speed of light heading who-knows-where.
The only comfort I had was my tom best friend, Saffronfur. He's a moon older than me. Funny. The joker. People often pair us two up, saying that we belong together. He hurls a sharp and witty retort every time they do that, but I think I know him better.
I have a hunch that he does take interest in me.
I can't say if I like him or not. He's certainly nice enough, and he's caring, but I really don't know.
When I met Mothpaw up at the fresh-kill pile, I saw that the place where we usually sit was full. Of course, Mothpaw and Flowerpaw were there. There was also Creampaw, Whitepaw, and Lionpaw. Flowerpaw's friends.
It was just a small tree trunk that could only fit five cats, no matter how much you squeezed. Unless you were a kit, which I wasn't, if there were five at that trunk then too bad. Find another spot.
Mothpaw's excited mew sounded. "Goldenpaw! I'm so sorry! I kind of..."
"Kind of forgot? Well...that's okay. I'll just go sit with Saffronfur." I turned away, very much hearing the whistles that followed me as I padded over to Saffronfur.
He looked at me sympathetically. "No room today?"
I shake my head. I plop down in front of him and ferociously begin to tear apart the rabbit that he has half-eaten. "I just don't get it," I mumbled between mouthfuls.
"Well, since I'm not a she-cat and I really hope I'm not..." I giggle slightly and he winks. "I would just let them be. Who knows? Maybe one day Mothpaw will realize that you're her best choice, abandon Flowerpaw and hang out with you?"
"That's the problem. Flowerpaw is everything that I'm not. She's pretty, she's friendly, she's witty, she's welcoming. I'm not saying that I'm ugly and mean and stupid, but she's a notch higher up than I am." I finish the rabbit. "Oops...sorry, I hope you weren't that hungry..."
Saffronfur laughed. "Well, seeing you satisfied my stomach, so no worries."
Was that flirting?
I smile uncertainly. He smiles back and I think I see a disappointed glint in his eye. I'm not too sure.
For now, all I could do is wait things out and hope they get better.