A/N: Yay! Another Starship fic! Slight Tazuary friendship, eventual Tup. Read/Review, please! Oh, and by the way, there are a buttload of references in here. Chocolate Chip cookie to whoever gets the two AVPM/S references, and to whoever gets the Cory in the House reference, you can give me any prompt and I will personally write you a one-shot (Starkid or Glee related) :)
The Makeover
"You know, you could be, like, really pretty if you wanted to be."
February's words broke the silence in the nearly empty cafeteria onboard Starship 15A2.
Taz lifted her eyes from the weapons catalog she was reading through. She looked over both of her shoulders, confirming that she was the only other person in the room. "Me?" she said.
"Yes, you!" February answered happily, "Who else could I be talking to?"
"Jourself." Taz answered dryly.
"I'm already pretty, silly!" February said, "But yeah, if you, like, did your hair, and put on some make-up and changed out of that fugly training uniform, you'd probably be totally hot."
Taz rolled her eyes. "I have no interest in being caliente."
"I didn't say you would be caliente, I said you would be hot," February replied, before letting out a high-pitched squeal. "Ooh! I just had another think! Can I give you a makeover? Please?"
"Hm, lemme think abou- no." Taz said flatly, focusing back on her catalog.
"Please Tazzy? It's the second think I had in a month! That means it's gotta be a good idea! Please! Pleasepleaseprettyplease?"
"Okay, okay, just shuddup!" Taz exclaimed, "I just have three conditions."
"Anything!" February agreed, an excited smile on her face. "Uno, never call me 'Tazzy' again, or I will kill chu. Dos, don't expect me to stay 'made-over' for more than uno dia. Y tres, no rosado."
At February's confused expression, Taz translated "No pink."
February blew out a puff of air, sending a few strands of her perfectly bobbed blonde bangs flying.
"Fine," she pouted, "But come on!"
February cleared her throat loudly. "Attention Starship Rangers!" she said, waving her arms, "Please come this way!"
She grabbed Bug's claw, dragging him in the direction of the girls' dorms. Once the entire crew had gathered in February's room, she smiled happily and began the speech that she had prepared earlier.
"Starship Rangers of Starship 15A2. Are you ready to see the most totally awesome thing you will ever experience in your lives? It's mind-blowing. It's amazing. It's totally my best work, an absolute quagmire of epic proportions."
"Quagmire of epic proportions?" Bug asked, stunned that February knew such high-level words.
"Yeah, I looked it up in this funny word book that Specs gave me. Oh, by the way, here it is." She threw the thick book at Specs, who was nearly knocked off her chair in her attempt to catch it. "Anyways, back to the epic proportions. You better prepare yourselves for a masterpiece that I have named 'Taz, the Girl'!"
She gestured to her bathroom door with a wide flourish. Nothing happened.
February glanced at the door, then tried again. "Taz, the Girl!" she said slightly louder with the same gesture.
After a few seconds, February exhaled angrily. "Taz! Get out here!"
"No!" Taz yelled from inside the bathroom, "Dis wasn't part of de deal!"
"I'm sorry; we seem to be having some... technical difficulties. Please hold."
February ran into the bathroom, and a loud commotion was heard. Up and Krayonder shared a confused glace when the sound of glass breaking was heard, and Specs, Bug and Tootsie winced simultaneously after a particularly loud crash was heard. Finally, the door flew open. February got behind Taz, bracing herself and using all her weight to shove Taz out of the bathroom. The Rangers gasped loudly as they finally got a view of the petite Latina.
Taz looked down at herself and quickly attempted to run back into the bathroom, but the door was being blocked by February. "Model for them, Taz!" she said, a smirk on her face.
Taz glared at her, but didn't move.
Everyone stared at Taz in shock and awe. February had managed to smooth down Taz's mullet to give her bangs, replacing Taz's red bandanna with a deep red rose pinned above her right ear. The camouflage-and-white outfit that Taz usually wore was gone, and in its place was a white, spaghetti strap sundress with a red sash tied around her tiny waist. The white complemented Taz's skin amazingly, bringing out her tan and giving her almost an angelic glow. While Taz's chunky black boots and silver dog tags still remained, February had somehow managed to avoid Taz's knife and put make-up on her, adding color to her cheeks and using eyeliner to give her brown eyes a wide, innocent look.
"What are chu staring at, idiotas? Chu got a problem?"
"Taz!" Krayonder half-yelled in his normal fashion, "You look like a chick, man! An actual chick, like, a babe, like, an actual chick, man! Woah!"
"You look real purty, Taz," Tootsie drawled, "You look like the girl that won the Miss Farm Planet pageant last year!"
"See, Taz!" February exclaimed, "I told you everyone would love it!"
Taz hesitated for a second, then shot a death glare at her. "Shuddup." she said angrily, her face turning red, "Dis... Dis was an idea estupido!"
With that, Taz ran out of February's room, slamming the door behind her.
Up knocked softly on Taz's door.
"Taz?" he asked softly before slowly opening the door, preparing himself for a possible knife attack.
Instead he saw Taz, curled up in a ball on her bed, her eye makeup running down her face. She looked up with bloodshot eyes. "Go away!" she yelled, turning her head away from him.
Instead, Up came in the room and sat down on the bed next to Taz and, despite her protests, put a comforting arm around her.
"Taz, what's wrong? What's going on with you? I've never seen you act like this before." he said worriedly.
Taz wiped the tears from her face and sniffed, her sad expression replaced with an angry snarl.
"Nothing's wrong. Now leave me alone. I dun need chu here." Her accent was thicker than usual, the way it did when she gets upset.
"Taz. Tell me. You are tough, Taz. You don't cry unless something's really wrong."
"I'm not crying!" Taz snapped, "And I told chu, nothing's wrong. Leave me alone, ese."
"Taz, I'm not leaving," Up persisted, "until you tell me. I want to help."
"Chu can't help!" Taz exclaimed, "Don't chu see? Chu are what's wrong! Te amo, Up, I love chu, but chu never noticed me. Dat's why, dat's why I let February dress me up like a leetle flower, porque I thought dat if I looked like a niña, chu would like me. But it was a mistake. I look ridiculoso, pathetic, y desperate. Chu didn't even notice me at all! Chu didn't even say anything."
Up put his hand on Taz's forearm. "Taz, of course I noticed you. But not because you changed your clothes."
Taz looked up at Up, a confused look in her eyes. "Que?"
"I always notice you, Taz," Up explained, "Because you always look beautiful to me."