The eerie glow from a gigantic flat-panel LCD monitor illuminated the faces of the pitch-black room's two occupants.
The image on-screen focused in on a girl whose boundless energy was apparent in the way she tightly gripped a microphone with two fists. The oversized pink ribbon atop her head bobbled about as she eagerly announced, "This is Renge Houshakuji reporting from Ouran Academy's Music Room #3. For today's session of the Host Club, I, the group's manager, secretly replaced our fresh-brewed regular coffee with commoner's coffee!"
Leaning in toward the viewers for dramatic effect, she then asked conspiratorially, "Is Hescafe Instant Coffee rich enough to be served to Japan's wealthiest students? Let's take a look!"
The scene cut to a wide shot of the third music room's interior, the words "Hidden Camera" superimposed at the bottom of the screen. The lens zoomed in on Haruhi using the club's fine china to pour coffee for Tamaki's guests. Almost immediately, several girls hid their distaste for the beverage by politely coughing into their napkins.
However, Ayanokoji declared, "Tamaki, this coffee is delicious! Is it that exclusive Sumatran kopi luwak blend?"
Sheepishly, the Host King shrugged, for once wisely remaining silent.
The segment then cut to Honey and Mori's table. This time, the camera caught their guests exchanging embarrassed looks.
Finally, one of them spoke up. "Oh Honey, we all prefer drinking tea when eating cake with you!" she tittered, nervously.
Then the scene swung around to the Hitachiin twins' table, where the brothers had twined their arms like lovers before simultaneously drinking from their cups.
"Whoa, this is commoner's coffee!" loudly exclaimed Hikaru.
"Hey Kyouya," called out Kaoru, his voice carrying across the room, "did you switch the coffee to Hescafe? I recognize the cheap, yet addictive flavor!"
Suddenly, off-screen, there was the sound of breaking china and a muffled scream. The camera quickly jerked back to Tamaki's table, zeroing in on a furious Ayanokoji looking madder than a wet hen. "Instant coffee? Gross!" she spat. "I thought this was a high-class establishment!" The girl clutched her stomach. "Oh! I feel shooting pains! Haruhi, you uncouth commoner! You tricked me into drinking this crap! If you poisoned me, I'll…"
It was then that the LCD monitor went black and the lights in the darkened room revealed a high-tech video editing bay and a deadly calm Kyouya Ootori, his finger poised atop the pause button.
"I'm sorry, Renge, but we cannot allow this segment to air on Moe Moe TV." His smile was pleasant, but his voice held an undercurrent of warning. "It's our duty to protect our guests from… embarrassing scenes, like the one today.
"In the future, if you wish to change our menu or do any investigative journalism on the club, please check in with me first."
With that said, he tapped the delete key.
Unfortunately for Kyouya and the rest of the club, Renge was only half-listening. New inspiration had hit! Her fan girl senses were already in overdrive, making mental check lists for the next Moe Moe TV undercover report, "Commoner, Haruhi Fujioka: The Real Story."