"Oomph!"
Sheldon heard his daughter gasp. He looked over his shoulder to see her collapsed by the couch in a tiny ball.
"Oh, Mia, baby," he cooed, leaving his desk chair and lifting her in his arms.
She had gotten awfully clumsy after her fourth birthday. Well at least that's when he began to notice it. How long had this been going on?
"Mia, you've got to be more careful," he scolded, balancing her on his hip.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her head in his chest.
Sheldon sighed and pressed his lips to the top of her head. He hated that. He hated it when Mia did it. He hated it when Amy did it. It rendered him a puddle of helplessness at the feet of his girls. "Hey, how would you like to read a story with me?"
Mia lifted her head and smiled. "Yeah!" she cheered, her left eye dimple forming just above her chubby cheek.
"All right!" Sheldon cheered in reply as he carried her over to the bookshelf. "Pick any book you'd like. Here, I won't look," he encouraged, turning his head to the side.
Mia bounced in his arms as she giggled and reached out her tiny hand after careful consideration. "This one!"
Sheldon took the book from her hands and started towards the couch. "Hmm. Founding Brothers by Joseph J. Ellis," he commented dryly. Penny had left it at his apartment after finishing it for a community college history class. "Mia, are you sure you wouldn't like a physics or biology or chemistry or anatomy or... even a geology book?" he asked, choking on the last part.
Mia took her place on her father's lap, but stood her ground. "This one."
Sheldon rolled his eyes, but flipped to chapter one anyway. "I'll read one sentence and you read the next, how about that?"
She nodded her head excitedly.
"Okay. Chapter One: The Duel. The most succinct version of the story might go like this: On the morning of July 11, 1804, Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton were rowed across the Hudson River in separate boats to a secluded spot near Weehawken, New Jersey," he read, running his finger under the words so she could follow along. "You're up, doll face."
Instead of immediately picking up where he left off, she leaned her head forward until her eyes were as close to the page as possible. "There, in accord with the customs of code duello, they exchanged pistol shots at ten paces. Your turn, daddy!" she commanded, leaning back into his chest.
Sheldon sighed and closed the book, much to Mia's dismay.
"Mia," he began, lifting her off his lap and sitting her next to him. "Is it possible that the reason you keep running into things is because you're having vision problems?"
She balled her fists in her lap. "No," she whispered, avoiding his gaze.
"I'm making you an appointment at the optometrist," he said, reaching into his pocket for his phone.
"Daddy, no!" Mia yelled.
"Mia, if you go see the optometrist, he can give you glasses so that you can see better," he encouraged, using the same coaxing tone he used when trying to get her to go to bed.
"But I don't want glasses," she pouted, leaving the couch to sit at her kitchen stool.
Sheldon joined her and stood on the opposite side of the bar. "Oh, come on, Mia. Your mommy wears glasses. And Aunt Bernadette. And Uncle Leonard! Practically everyone is wearing glasses these days!" Sheldon exclaimed as Amy walked through the door.
"Hi, family," she greeted, joining them in the kitchen.
"Hi, mommy," Mia said before returning to her pouting.
"Hi, baby," Amy replied, kissing her on the head before turning to Sheldon. "Hi, baby number two," she said, pecking him on the lips.
"Hi," he returned. "Hey, do you have your optometrist's number saved to your phone?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Mia needs glasses."
"No, I don't!" Mia interjected.
"Oh yeah?" Sheldon challenged, sliding her a can across the wooden surface. "Read the nutrition label on this can of soup."
Mia returned his challenging glare. "Fine."
She leaned in closer to the label. And closer. And closer. And then the can was gone.
"Hey!" Mia yelled.
"Nope, you're cut off," Amy said, placing the can back on the counter. "And you're getting those glasses."
"Mommy, I'll look ri-dic-u-lous," the young girl sounded out.
"Hey, I wear glasses," said Amy, slightly offended.
"I tried to tell her that," Sheldon said, sitting on the other stool next to Mia. "And I don't think your mommy looks ridiculous. I think she looks beautiful, just like how you'd look with glasses."
Mia swiveled to face her father. "Everybody makes fun of Gally Thompson because she wears glasses."
"Everybody?" Amy asked.
"Yes!"
"Even you?" Sheldon interceded.
He would put up with his daughter's historian antics, but he would not put up with bullying coming from his own kin.
"No..." she sighed. "Not me. Because mommy and Aunt Bernadette and Uncle Leonard and Clark Kent all wear glasses."
"Ooh, Clark Kent, that's a good one!" Sheldon exclaimed.
Amy patted his hand. "Mia, you won't care about any bullies once you get glasses, trust me. You'll be too busy marveling at leaves and books and movie subtitles." A small trace of a smile graced Mia's face as Amy continued. "Besides, all the other kids will forget that you're even wearing them after a while."
She looked at her mom. And then to her dad. And then to the can of soup. "All right."
A week later, Amy stood with Mia in front of a tall display of glasses frames.
"Pick any pair you like," Amy encouraged her.
Mia didn't move. She didn't like any of them.
Amy sighed and removed a pair from the wall. "How about these ones? Yellow's your favorite color."
Mia shrugged. "All right."
Amy squatted to her daughter's height and slid the frames over her face. She angled her toward a mirror. "What do you think?"
Mia simply couldn't muster any excitement. "It's fine, I guess..."
Amy sighed and slipped the glasses off of Mia's face. "Let me tell you a little secret." The girl's eyes lit up. "Sometimes, when nobody's looking, even your daddy wears glasses."
"He does?"
"He does, I swear!" Amy smiled at her. "He wears them every night when he reads a book before bed."
Mia frowned. "How come he doesn't wear them when he reads to me?"
"Well, he's a little nervous about being made fun on, just like you are. He should be wearing them when he grades papers and plays on his laptop, too," she said, returning the yellow frames to their spot on the wall.
"If I wear mine, will daddy wear his?" she asked.
Amy stopped. She had just as much trouble getting Sheldon to wear glasses as she did with Mia. She sighed, but made the promise anyway. "I'm sure we can arrange that."
"She what?" a stupefied Sheldon cried, abandoning his work.
"She won't wear her glasses unless you wear yours," Amy repeated, running her hand through her hair.
"But A-my!" Sheldon whined, standing up from his desk chair. "I look ridiculous in my glasses!"
"No, you don't," Amy reassured him, running her hand up and down his arm. "And think of the example you're setting for Mia. I'm pretty sure those were her exact words."
Sheldon sighed and walked to the refrigerator for a bottle of water.
Amy followed after him. "Sheldon, babe, if we want Mia to wear them, you have to wear them, too. Come on, you don't have to wear them everywhere, just around the house for a few days," she begged. "Please?"
He didn't budge.
Amy stepped toward him. "For Mia?"
"Oh, that's cheap," he replied, capping the water bottle.
She smiled. "Go put 'em on, I'll get Mia from her room."
"You disgust me!" he called out to her in jest before disappearing into their bedroom.
Amy laughed and knocked on Mia's door and waited for it to open. It didn't. She opened it anyway to find her daughter face-down on her bed, her nose literally buried in a book. Amy sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed her back. "I picked up your glasses after work today."
She begrudgingly closed the book and sat up. "Is daddy wearing his?" she asked.
Amy smirked. "Why don't you go into the living room and see?"
Mia hopped off the bed and hurried her little legs toward the open area like it was Christmas morning. Sheldon was sitting at his desk, facing away from them. It didn't stop Mia from pulling on his pant leg and gazing up at him in wonder.
"It's true," she gasped when he finally looked down at her with thick black frames.
Sheldon found it in him to smile before lifting her onto his lap. "Yeah, it's true. But I'm not wearing them unless you do." He turned to his desk and pulled Mia's new glasses from the drawer. As he slid the frames over her face, he realized they were just a smaller version of his own. "Well would you look at us? A couple of genetically inferior twins," he commented.
"Well I think you both look beautiful," Amy said before plopping a copy of Founding Brothers on the desk in front of them. "Now I believe you two have a book to finish."