AN: Allow me to explain. I got tired of seeing all the Mary Sues/self-insertions/perfect people in the HP section that I wrote a short little Mary Sue fic. Yes, it's making fun of that girl that everybody but the author hates. So take it like that, okay? I just took the most common elements of all the Mary Sue stories and smushed them together. Enjoy

Harry was bored. Hermione was fighting with Ron. Like normal. And Harry was bored. He placed his head on the table in the Great Hall and decided to wait for something to happen.

He didn't have to wait long. SHE came in. She was beautiful! Long, shiny red hair that went down to her knees and violet eyes. She had beautiful violet eyes. Harry instantly fell in love with her. He wanted to meet her. To say something to her.

Once again, he didn't have to wait long, she was walking towards the Gryffindor table. She sat down right next to Harry!

"Hi." She smiled.

All Harry could do was stare.

"My name's Sandra. I'm an exchange student from the US."

Harry nodded his head like an idiot.

"Hi Sandra. I'm Ron."

Harry turned his head. Ron had the same shocked expression on his face, but he had managed to say something to this beautiful girl.

"Hi Ron." She smiled again. Harry nearly fainted at the smile.

"You seem a bit young to be a 5th year." Hermione said in a friendly tone.

"Well...I'm only 12. But I got moved up several grades because I'm so good." She blushed as if embarrassed.

"Cool!" Said Hermione. "Why don't we go up and you can teach me some new spells. I've also been having some trouble with some spells. Maybe you can help me."

"Okay."

Sandra and Hermione left to go to the Common Room. Harry and Ron just sat, stunned. Then they both said, in unison, "She's mine."

***

Soon every guy at Hogwarts had a crush on Sandra. Wherever she went, heads would turn. All the girls were friends with her. And she had already put together a school choir, a school band, a school orchestra, a school drama group, a school newspaper, and a school weather team. She was in all of these, and also joined the Quidditch team as the new Keeper. She was supposed to be the best Keeper in the history of Hogwarts. The other team never scored a point on her.

Then it happened. Dumbledore announced that there was going to be a dance. "For no reason whatsoever," he explained.

Everybody was excited. Except for Sandra. See, Sandra didn't notice that all the guys liked her, so she thought nobody would ask her. In fact, before any guy could get a chance to ask, she ran up to the common room and started to cry.

Harry followed her. She was alone on the couch. Even crying, she looked beautiful.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Nobody'll ask me to the dance. I just know it."

Wow. And she was humble, too.

"I'll ask you." He said.

She looked at Harry and smiled. "Okay."

***

In the teacher's lounge right before the dance, the teachers were talking amongst themselves. All agreed that Sandra was an exemplary student...probably the best that Hogwarts had ever had.

"Her transfiguration skills are unsurpassed." McGonagall said.

"And she does charms like no one else." Flitwick piped up.

"Her potions are always the best." Said Snape.

Everybody agreed: Sandra was the best student ever at Hogwarts.

***

Harry and Sandra met up at the dance. She was wearing a pretty pink dress that made her hair look even prettier. Guys threw glares and jealous glances at Harry. Even Ron was jealous.

Harry and Sandra took the center of the floor. Sandra was a good dancer.

"I like dancing." She said. "It reminds me of my parents."

"What about them?" Harry asked.

"My parents were killed by a crazy wizard when I was 7. I watched them die." Sandra started to cry.

Harry kissed her. He had wanted to for a while, and he felt that the moment was right.

***

Weeks passed. All the guys were jealous of Harry. And Sandra and Harry were closer than ever. The teachers talked about Sandra graduating early. After all, she was perfect.

Then it happened. Sandra was staying up late in the Common Room studying when he entered. Somehow, by magical means, a crazy wizard entered the Common Room. Sandra turned, a look of horror on her face.

"I've come to finish the job!" Said the wizard.

He raised his wand. "Avada Kedavra."

Sandra fell limp in the chair. Then the crazy wizard disappeared.

***

Harry knelt beside Sandra's grave at the funeral. The whole school had turned out. Everybody was crying, because everybody had loved Sandra. Harry had been asked to speak.

"Sandra," he said. "Was perfect. And she had a hard life. We'll keep her in our hearts forever." He couldn't talk anymore because he was crying so hard. Hermione put a comforting arm around his shoulders.

Remember Sandra, the mysterious perfect exchange student whom everybody loved.

AN cont'd: Once again, don't take this seriously. It's not meant to be taken seriously. Please review. Feel free to flame me. It's cold down where I am, I could use some flames.