Prologue
Author's Note: I hope you all enjoy this. I know the prologue is vague, but well I still hope you enjoy it. Oh and the grammar mistakes. Yeah on purpose. This is actually my first story, so let's hope it's okay.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Twilight. Not the character or the plot.
Rest assured this is a Twilight story.
Carpe diem means seize the day. Yet, what day should we seize. The day when we lost everything and ourselves, or the day when we so tediously try to achieve our dreams and happiness. Which day is the best day. Is it when we feel protected from the world as we isolate everything, even us, when we feel content with our numbness. Or is it when we use all our energy searching for our dreams, yet are so exposed to the dangers around us; when we are living beings who are suddenly happy as we stumble upon a shinning hope, then depressed as we meet a dead end, then confused as we are lost. What do we want? A life filled with consistency or a life full of fluctuating events? Which is more worth it? Should we take a risk, ignoring all the possibilities of heartache, and try with all our beings to search for happiness, or should we protect ourselves and recluse ourselves in our content bubbles, without any chances for full happiness? So I ask again, what do we want. What do I want...
Despite all the smiles and laughter around me. Despite all the love and affection. Despite all the little children so full of innocence playing in the sandbox. Despite the cute little dog wagging its tail, waiting for the ball. Despite the glowing faces of my friends as they joke around. Despite the eye roll my brother always does when we argue. Despite the crinkles at the corners of my mother's eyes as she laughs. I want nothing more than the numbness. I crave it. I crave the ability to shed my fake smile and laughter and replace it with a face of nothing.
I wanted it all to stop. I wanted my friends to stop hurting when I always say I'm fine. I want my mother to stop worrying. Please stop. Please...
I'm sorry. So sorry. I'm sorry I failed you, daddy. I'm sorry I failed you, mommy. I'm sorry I failed you, brother. I'm sorry I failed you, my friends.
I deserve it all. The sharp pain in my chest. The mental and physical exhaustion. I am gladly accepting my punishment.
But I need to protect all of you. I can see that my poor attempt to remain the Bella you know is causing you pain and frustration. I have to stop this, for all your sakes.
It's time to cut my ties. It's time for me to let go of everything I love, so you can all be happy. It's time…
That's the prologue. Please comment so I know if it's good. :) Greatly appreciated, crazyinawf.