"Dan Wins The Lottery!"

Rated T

Disclaimer: I do not own anything associated with Street Fighter or any of its characters. Street Fighter and its characters are owned by Capcom. Anyway, this is my first time doing a fic for the Street Fighter fandom, so here you go. A drabble starring Dan, Sakura and Blanka just for you!

P.S.: I still don't own Capcom either.

It was another Saturday afternoon as Dan was busy slaving away at his Saikyo Dojo with his two proteges, Sakura and Blanka. After a round of fighting, punching and showing off, Dan figured it was nice to get a little break from all of that training.

So Dan suggested a little three-person game of poker just to pass the time. Instead of using money, Dan was betting on some delicious oven-baked oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. By now, it was Sakura's turn to deal.

"Okay, I'll take out three," Sakura said, laying down the three poker cards she wanted to get rid of. "Blanka, your turn." She replied.

However, when it was his turn...

*MUNCH!*

Blanka started eating his poker cards in front of Dan and Sakura, who looked a little creeped out.

"Oh, that's just great!" Sakura groaned. "That's the fourth hand he's eaten today! I swear, he thinks those cards are cheesy nachos! Am I right, Dan?"

Sakura then turned to Dan, who was busy scratching a card with his coin.

"Um, why are you scratching one of your poker cards?" Sakura raised her eyebrow.

"Oh, it's a lottery ticket," Dan replied. "And it's for one million smackeroos!"

"You can't be serious..." Sakura muttered.

"Ohh, it's dead serious, my faithful student!" Dan exclaimed. "Time after time, I've been horrible with luck! Just like that time I lost a ghost pepper eating contest to Blanka. Or perhaps it's just like me having to tightrope over the entire Hong Kong District through telephone lines."

"Which you failed at, considering the wire caught your boxers and you fell down on a coop of chickens while they pecked you butt-naked." Sakura said, bringing that up.

"It was only one time, Sakura!" Dan exclaimed. "Well, my horrible luck stops here, guys! This is the moment that changes everything! With one million smackeroos, I could buy us a bigger dojo, a bigger teppanyaki grill and better than that, matching Team Dan t-shirts!"

"This is sooooo ridiculous," Sakura sighed. "Even if by some miracle you actually win, I highly doubt there's a chance you'll really-"

"I WON!"

Hearing this from Dan, both Sakura and Blanka ended up speechless as ever. They couldn't believe the two words that were heard from this idiot of a sensei.

"Wait a minute..." Sakura muttered. "You actually won."

"THAT'S RIGHT, BABY!" Dan yelled in celebration.

Then just to rub it in both of their faces, Dan showed both of them the winning card.

"See it? All 5's in a single X!" Dan chuckled. "I'll tell ya, we're finally living in dough!"

"Um, Dan...?" Sakura replied.

"We're talking about five-star restaurants, dining with the president, rolling in the richest Rolls Royces!" Dan smirked.

"Dan..." Sakura groaned, trying to get Dan her attention.

"Heck, if we want, we can attach a hibachi grill on top of our Rolls Royce!" Dan exclaimed. "I'm telling ya, I like the idea of Hibachi To-Go!"

"DAN!" Sakura screamed.

"Owww, what's the deal with your screaming?" Dan said, rubbing his ears a bit.

"Sorry to break to you about this, but it's about your lottery ticket." Sakura replied.

"I know, right?" Dan chuckled. "We're talking about $1,000,000! That's the eqvivalent of seven billion donuts!"

"That lottery ticket actually expired eight days ago." She confessed.

All of a sudden, Dan was stopped in his tracks.

"I don't understand," Dan replied. "I read in the ticket that this card doesn't expire until the 18th. And today's the 18th!"

"It expired on the 10th, Dan!" Sakura cried out. "That date had a little tiny dirt smudge!"

"Wait, it did?" Dan gasped.

Just to make sure, Dan took his finger tip and licked it, therefore rubbing off the tiny peck of dirt which seemed to be covering an 8. When the smidge disappeared, Dan was shocked to find out that it was an "0" instead of an "8". His jaw literally dropped like a 100-pound meteorite.

"Does this mean I lost?!" Dan gasped.

"I'm afraid you did," Sakura nodded.

Dan was now lost for words. He couldn't believe that he bought himself an expired lottery ticket. It was now worthless than the blank expression shown on Dan's entire face. So after a few minutes of silence, Dan replied with the best statement he knew to say to Sakura:

"I'LL KILL YA!"

That's when Dan wrapped his hands around Sakura's neck, choking her out in a Homer Simpson-esque way! Sakura could felt her entire face turn blue as a result of those strong palms restricting her neck tightly. Sakura was hacking and gagging like crazy, trying to get some air desperately.

"AGGGGH... BLANKA, HELP MEEEEEEEE...!" Sakura gasped.

Blanka ended up doing nothing at all.

The green-skinned beast with long orange hair ended up sniffing himself and itching his own butt, confused of what was going on between Dan and Sakura.

Luckily for Sakura, her butt got saved by one of the members of the Western Hong Kong Police Department, who ended up beating the crap out of Dan and arresting them. Dan was then charged with first-degree assault and disturbing the peace, and not to mention a $10,000 bail. Unfortunately, Dan didn't have enough money to pay for his bail, so he was pleaded guilty and sentenced to only four months in prison, where he became bunk buddies with an intimate, yet muscular gay cellmate named Roger. The experience Dan felt was so excruicating, uncomfortable and a little gay. In fact, it was so gay, that Dan was never ever the same again.

And that's the last time he ever did the lottery again as well.

Ouch, that sucks for Dan. I hope his cellmate makes him feel better at home, aka Prison. But either way, I still love Dan. He is so far one of my favorite characters in the Street Fighter series. His quips and signature taunts always make me laugh for sure.

Anyway, feedbacks are welcome! Until next time, Warrior out! PEACE!