The Winter Diaries by Makai Goddess Ookami
Harry Potter and all related terms are copyright of the near-goddess JKRowling and all her associates. I'm gonna be honest, I'm too lazy to find everyone who owns a piece of this. This was obviously made for no profit, or I would have thus been fired because it's been three years since I've posted this and it isn't finished. Kudos to Timber Wolf10 for letting me borrow the 'movie' feel for this, and I'd like to credit her with the 'movies' Catch Me If You Can, Freaky Friday, Brothers Baby Sitting Service, and Cheaper by the Dozen. (You'd need to read her fics to understand). I also, in no way at all, own The Labyrinth, Reign of Fire, The Lost Boys, or The Princess Diaries. I'm just here to make fun of them.
Pre-Reading A/N: Once again, I'd like to thank Timber Wolf10 for giving me permission to borrow her style to write this. However, when I had written this the first time, it was a lot simpler and closer to her own than it is now. Yes, that means I've rewritten this and picked it back up. If you don't like that, you can suck it.
The "Movie" itself takes place during chapters twenty two and twenty three of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (more specifically, the scenes involving the Yule Ball). That means THERE WILL BE SIMILARITES, IF NOT PRACTICALLY WORD-FOR-WORD. I apologize. I do try to stay cannon. (Once again, suck it if you don't like.) So yes this will be Hermione/Krum. I adore this pairing, even if it was never meant to be. There will also be one-sided Hermione/Ron (on more than one account, multiple times, if you squint and read between the lines. Once again, don't like? Suck it.)
I'd like to state this again in case it wasn't clear enough the first time (which it might not be as I tend to ramble) I have rewritten this fic since the original time I posted it back in the summer of twenty-oh-five. I've tried to keep things the same (I left in all mention of Ginny, and since I detest her so, count that a miracle). Also, that means there will be some allusions to events that happen in books four through seven. I apologize, but count this as your spoiler warning.
So, before I start to ramble once more, I present you with The Winter Diaries v1.1.
(Approx. Word Count 2,256)
Prologue: Another Week, Another Movie
It had been a few weeks since The Weasley family had last been able to gather and watch movies; what with Bill being married; Charlie living in Romania; Percy, Fred and George all living away from home; and Ron trying to save the world. They all had jobs, too, to complicate matters. Bosses did prefer employees show up for work once in a while.
But despite everyone's very hectic and very different schedules, they had all managed to gather in The Burrow once more. As it was, the old Muggle TV Mr. Weasley had was plugged up, thanks to magical engineering by Fred and George, bowls of crisps and popcorn were scattered about, and more than one pop can was in danger of spilling and staining the carpet.
However, this time was special. A certain bushy-haired, Muggle-born and formally large-toothed Hermione Granger had joined them for the pleasure of watching a Weasley & Weasley creation, and was currently nestled between Ginny and Percy on the floor. Harry was busy trying to avoid publicity, so was unable to join.
"Alright," Fred said, trotting into the room carrying an old Muggle video recorder, while George carried the box of movies they'd made over the past few years. "Any preferences?"
"What do you have?" Ron asked, leaning forward as he tried to peer into the box.
"Freaky-" George started, but Percy cut him off with an annoyed "We've already seen it."
"Gripe, gripe," Fred snorted, shaking his head. "What about... Reign of Fire?"
An amused, but slightly embarrassed look crossed Charlie's face. "Um, no."
Both Fred and George snickered, glancing at Hermione. The Muggle-born blushed slightly. If the title was alluding to what she thought it was, she remembered it quite perfectly. Let's just say there was Charlie, a couple of dragons, fire, and certain blonde haired Slytherin she really would rather not think about.
"Brother's Baby Sitting Service?" George offered, pulling one tape out, "Or, Cheaper By The Dozen?"
Ginny forfeited her spot by Hermione to crawl over to the twins and peak into the box, and her spot was immediately taken by Ron. She shuffled through them, before pulling one out. "What's this one?" She asked curiously.
"Ah, The Winter Diaries..." Fred said, letting his voice trail off.
"It's a bit of a romantic comedy," George finished, nodding his head.
"Oooh," Ginny said, her face lighting up. "I do enjoy romantic comedies..."
"We know you do," Fred said, laughing slightly as he took the movie from her.
"So does Percy," George continued.
"I do not!" Percy whined.
Fred and George shared a look, before both of them rolled their eyes. "Whatever, Perce," Fred said, snorting slightly. Percy flushed slightly.
"Well, do we have any objections?" George asked, taking the tape from Fred, pausing before he put it in.
"Sounds good," Mrs. Weasley said, nodding her head.
"Meh, I'm up for whatever," Bill replied, shrugging, and Charlie nodded his agreement.
"Okay," Hermione agreed, and Ron nodded. "What she said."
Mr. Weasley shrugged.
"Aww, not going to own up to your secret obsession for romcoms, Perce?" Fred teased.
"Shut up and put it in," Percy snapped.
"Please note that no Quidditch players were harmed in the making of this film," George joked as he put the tape in and turned it on.
The TV went blank for a moment, before lighting up once more to play the previews.
The Weasley Boys have a secret.
The screen flashes between images of Bill chomping down heartily on an apple, Charlie tending a burn on his forearm, Percy glancing between several books and a roll of parchment with a quill at hand, the twins crouched over and poking something, and Ron snoring loudly on a hammock.
They told no one, until the day Harry Potter moved in next door.
Messy, dark-haired Harry Potter is assisting his uncle in unpacking a large lorrie while his aunt glanced at the boxes and dictated where they should be put. He pauses, and glances over to see Bill watching him through his own kitchen window.
Will Harry Potter take to their secret, or will he be the boys downfall?
A quick cascade of images, including, but not limited to: Harry and Ginny kissing, Bill covered in blood, The Twins both laying limp on the floor, Ron looking thoroughly annoyed, and Dean and Seamus looking scared witless, holding wooden stakes in their hands.
The Weasley Boys. Coming Soon.
They were thought to be extinct for hundreds of years...
A close up of two men working in a Tube Shaft when they stumbled upon a crevice in the wall. They share a look. Next, an above ground shot, a busy street below full of people doing their shopping as a large shadow covers them. A little girl looks up in confusion before screaming.
But when even the Muggles notice their presence...
The shadow continues to sail over London, only now the city is on fire and virtually empty. Corpses, abandoned vehicles, and rubbish of all degrees litters the streets. The shadow passes, and a small group of people dare stepping out of their hiding space.
Sparks
A large gust of flames fills the screen, and a small group of people who had been trying to escape the flames were successfully burned alive, their wretched screams polluting the once quiet air.
Will
The screams carry on, only now it's definitely female. The camera swerved to show Charlie Weasley standing in the middle of a near-empty street, his wand held in front of him as the large shadow fell over him. The ground trembled as the great beast landed before him.
Fly.
The camera swerves, panning around and showing off all of Hogwarts Castle right as a great, big dragon lands on it, spreading it's wings and causing ripples on the lake below. The image shifts to Charlie on an old broomstick, racing straight for a small red dragon, and then to Hermione Granger holding a book to her chest, eyes widened in fear, as a dragon sets it's gaze upon her.
Reign of Fire. Staring Charlie Weasley, Hermione Granger, and Draco Malfoy. Coming Soon.
Cursed by a Wish, Ginny Weasley is forced to enter a Land of the likes she had only ever read about in books in order to save her baby brother.
The screen shows beautiful, rolling country side speed by a good couple of kilometers below, before the land turns harsh and ugly, and the bird's eye view of the land now reveals a long, hard and complex maze. It zooms in, and Ginny is seen running through the long and winding lanes, stumbling over crumbled bits of wall, and the ever present and untamed bracken.
But she's fighting the clock in a land where the only rule is 'Stay Alive'.
A quick montage of images follows. Flying boulders, for starters, then a creepy enclosed space of hands that were tugging her ever downwards despite her protests. A masquerade ball, showing Ginny in a stunningly beautiful dress, and Draco Malfoy sauntering towards her and smirking in a deliciously sexy, yet evil sort of way. Also, random dancing House Elves.
Where everything seems possible, and nothing is what it seems.
Ginny staggered forward, a hand clutched to her chest as she struggled to catch her breath again. Her eyes narrowed as she death-glared Draco Malfoy, who was holding a baby ginger to his chest in a slightly affectionate and yet somehow bored way.
The Labyrinth. Stealing small children from towns near you. Also coming soon.
The previews ended, and upbeat pop music started playing as the opening credits began to roll.
Hermione leaned over and prodded Ginny gently in the side. "Remind me to destroy Reign of Fire," she whispered to the ginger, blushing slightly. Ginny snorted back her laughter, but nodded her head in obedience all the same.
And thus, the movie began.
TBC
Post-Reading A/N: First off, I love Percy with all of my black, twisted, dead and yet bleeding heart. I don't care what anybody says. He was back to fightin' the good fight in the end! Remember that!
Next, I suppose I should clarify some things... A RomCom is a Romantic Comedy. It's just what I call them. If you couldn't figure out what it had meant, I'm sorry. Sort of. It's sort of obvious, at least it was, IMHO.
The "Tube Shafts" I referred to was basically just another way to say Metro Shafts, or Subway Shafts. Shoot me for living in England. A Lorrie is a van/truck, bee-tea-dubs.
Continuing some simple explanatory process, because apparently it really wasn't that clear? The Weasley Boys is intended to be a parody of one of the greatest movies of all time, The Lost Boys. It's a 1987 film, starring Kiefer Sutherland as smexy vampire David, and Jason Patric as main character Michael Emerson, who's trying not to become a vampire.
The Labyrinth (which apparently, I really don't know how to spell) is a parody of 1986 film The Labyrinthstarring David Bowie as the smexy Jereth, The Goblin King, and Jennifer Connelly as Sarah. It will probably also have aspects of El Laberinto del fauno (AKA Pan's Labyrinth), a 2006 film that, I believe, was created in Spain. It stars Ivana Baquero as Ofelia, a young girl that lived in fascist Spain in 1994. She escapes reality into an eerie, yet captivating fantasy world. (Paraphrased from IMDB. So shoot me.) Both are brilliant movies, so I suggest you check 'em out. I'm not sure which one it will end up having the more basis for The Labyrinth if and when I get around to writing it, but I couldn't pick just one. (Once again, so shoot me.)
And finally, Reign of Fire is a parody of the 2002 film of the same title, Reign of Fire. It stars the grossly under appreciated, but definitely smexy Christian Bale as Quinn Abercromby, who witnessed the first dragon's reawakening, and is now the head of a small camp of survivors years later, I guess you'd say. Also starring, Matthew McConaughey and Izabella Scorupco. Basically, Dragons are taking over Europe (But not the band. Common misconception, I know). Oh no, there goes Tokyo, go go God – erm, Dragonzilla!
So to continue in the spirit of The Winter Diaries v1.0, here's the stats and voting system.
The Labyrinth – Draco/Ginny – Humour/Action/Adventure/Parody – K+
Reign of Fire – Draco/Hermione, Charlie/Hermione – Action/Adventure/Parody – T (Language, events)
The Weasley Boys – Harry/Ginny – Action/Adventure/Parody – T/M (Language, events, not smex)
Feel free to vote as many times as you want, I'm not actually keeping track. Just once per chapter, please. Only, please try to keep my track record in mind. After this, I've already got one other big fic in the making, so I'm not sure when this will go about getting done, so I apologize.