Title:Field of Innocence
Summary: Ginny reflects on her loss of innocence at the hand of Tom Riddle.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not the characters of Harry Potter, and certainly not Field of Innocence. These belong to JK Rowling and Evanescence respectively, as well as a whole bunch of other people.
Author's Notes: I started singing the song while washing up and had this idea. Most of my ideas seem to form when I'm elbow deep in soapy water. How strange.
WARNING: SPOILERS FOR HPB!
I still remember the world
From the eyes of a child
Ginny shivered, the coolness of the twighlight air rising goosebumps on her flesh. The smell ofhoneysuckle hung heavy in the air, transporting her back to her first year. The spell she'd used to write her last message had smelt of honeysuckle. Tom had smelt of honeysuckle.
Her skeleton will lie in the Chamber forever...
This time, her shiver had nothing to do with the night air and everything to do with her memories, everything to do with the dark-haired grey-eyed boy who'd been her first true friend...and her first true enemy. When she woke in the middle of the night crying, it wasn't because of the horrors she'd suffered during the war. It was the same old nightmare.
What if...what if he'd been too late? What if Tom had been too strong? What if she'd liked being Ginevra...
Slowly
those feelings
Were clouded by what I know now
When Colin had proposed to her, his husky "Ginevra Weasley, will you do me the honour of your hand in marriage?" had made her hyperventilate. She'd fainted in remembered terror, only to wake up an hour later lying on Harry Potter's couch while he sternly and quietly told Colin Creevey where he could shove his marriage proposal.
That conversation had frightened her. Frightened her because Tom had ruined any shred of humanity she had left. She just survived, now. Sure, for a while she'd pulled it back together. But that night...that last night...
Where has my heart gone
An
uneven trade for the real world
I want to go back to
Believing
in everything and knowing nothing at all
It was a long had fight, but she'd made it. She was standing next to Harry, lending him her support as he faced his demon...and hers...
After the Chamber of Secrets, Harry told her that Tom was just a memory encased in a book. Nothing more.
After Dumbledore's death and their
botched romance, he told her that Tom was a part of Voldemort's soul;
a 'Horcrux'. Still, he'd assured her, there was no way he'd remember
anything.
"After all, Gin, Professor Dumbledore said that
the pieces of his soul weren't really a part of him any longer."
The green-eyed wizard had said logically.
So imagine their surprise when Voldemort's red eyes had settled directly on her arrow-straight form, and he'd smiled. "Hello, Ginevra." He'd said, in the soft, lilting baritone she'd once thought was so delightful when spoken directly to her mind.
She'd frozen, then the terror had closed in. Five minutes she'd struggled to control it, unable to lift the suffocating darkness. The stinging slap Ron had administered helped, gave her something else to focus on, and helped her throw off the fear...for now...
I still
remember the sun
Always warm on my back
It was completely dark now, but Ginny didn't get up from the damp grass, nor take any notice of the absence of light. There was no light in her world now, that the physical world was mirroring her mental state was irrelevant to her, lost in her musings.
A hot rush of shame coursed through her body at her remembered failure. She'd been so scared it wouldn't have mattered if everyone around her suddenly died, she wouldn't have woken up.
She was a coward, plain and simple, not deserving of being a Gryffindor.
The knowledge that she was living a lie had eaten away at her for a year, poisoning her every thought.
Somehow it seems colder now
What a tangled web we weave, when we practice to deceive...
Where
has my heart gone
Trapped in the eyes of a stranger
"Ginny? What are you doing out here? You're shivering." A warm jacket that smelt of pine and cinnamon - Harry - settled over her shoulders.
Ginny was torn from her reverie, suddenly realising that she was frozen.
"I...I was just thinking." She said softly.
"Just thinking." The green-eyed wizard pulled her to her feet. "Why don't you 'just think' inside? Molly's out of her mind, you've been gone for over four hours."
"Ok." Ginny let him lead her inside.
"Hey," Harry stopped by the door, tipping her face up so he could look into her face. "Stop obsessing over it, ok? It's been three years, Gin. And it was understandable. Anyone in your position-"
"Would have done the same." Ginny interrupted, rolling her eyes. "Yes, I know."
A tender smile graced her fiance's face. "Good." He dropped a light kiss onto her lips, then hugged her gently, rubbing her shoulder-blades, massaging out the tenseness that had gathered there. "I love you, Gin-bee."
"I love you, too." Her words were muffled by his shirt.
"I'm glad. I have to go to work, now. See you later." He headed towards the exit.
Ginny leant her head against the doorframe, smiling softly. Yes, three years had passed, it was time to let go. Besides, she had nicer memories. Like 1st of September, 1991, when she fell in love with a green-eyed stranger.
I want to go back
to
Believing in everything
I still remember...
End