A Gigantic Abundance of Random Crossover Crap
Disclaimer: I don't own the following: Maximum Ride, Twilight, Artemis Fowl, Harry Potter, AND/OR The Hunger Games. *sob* Too....much....stuff....that I don't........own....*dies* I mean, seriously, cant I own just one little series? Or one character? Oh, wait I just remembered! I DO own: Snow, my Maximum Ride OC who I added here because she's awesomesauce AND Steve the Dancing Shark!!! And I own Kevin The Eskimo, Bubba the psychotic Easter Bunny, and Eyeball the um...eyeball. I don't own Jaybrams or Joe, cause they're actual people. I own myself though! Okay that sounded weird.
Chappie 1: Meet The Quacks
Max and the Flock were just randomly flying around in the general area of Forks, Washington one day, when this happened.
Edward: Look, flying people! *points at Flock*
Bella: Magic!!!
Max: Magic has nothing to do with it.
Snow: This is SCIENCE!
*Artemis Fowl pops out of nowhere*
Artemis: Did somebody say science???
Nudge: Who are you? What are you doing here? Do you like cookies?
Angel: That's Artemis Fowl. You never know when and/or where he's gonna show up.
Bella: More magic!!
*Harry Potter pops out of nowhere*
Harry: Did somebody say magic??? *does random magic stuff*
Snow: Do the whitecoats have us on some new experimental drug or something?
Bella: That doesn't sound like a happy ending! *cries* I only like HAPPY endings!!!
Snow: *singing along* SO MUCH FOR MY HAPPY ENDING!
Artemis: *suddenly notices Flock's wings* What the...?! Human-Avian Hybrids???
Max: We prefer Avian-American.
Snow: Or just bird-freaks seems to work, too.
Nudge: Wait, so whose the dude with the scar??
Harry: I'm the chosen one!
Angel: Chosen for what?
Harry: I have to save the wizarding world from Voldemort!
Max: I have to save the world!
Artemis: I have to prevent a Cross-species war!
Butler: I have to save protect Artemis!
Holly: I have to prevent discovery of the People!
Edward: I have to protect Bella! *stands in front of Bella and growls*
Bella: *gets all googly-eyed*
Snow: You don't set very high goals do you?
Edward: *defensively* It's harder than it sounds!
Katniss: I have to save myself, my sister, Peeta, and District 12!
Nudge: When did you get here?
Snow: Tell me we're not in the middle of a hunger games arena.
Katniss: Unfortunately...
At which point several psychotic Tributes, Erasers, Death-Eaters, B'wa Kell and Volturi crashed into the clearing.
Tributes, Erasers, Death-Eaters, B'wa Kell and Opal, James, Victoria, New-Borns and Volturi: GRRR! ARGH! FEAR US!!!
Snow: WHAT THE FNICK?!?!
*a humongous fight breaks out*
Edward: *Using awesomesauce vampire speed to protect Bella*
Bella: *hiding behind Edward, crying*
Max, Fang, Iggy, Snow, Nudge: *Flying above, fighting Erasers in the air, using awesomesauce bird-kid powers*
Gazzy: *Using his, err, gift, to ward off enemies*
Angel: *Using freaky mind control on anyone who comes near*
Harry: *Using awesomesauce magic curses and stuff to fend off Death-Eaters*
Artemis: *Hiding behind rock*
Katniss: *sitting in tree, using arrows to kill off other tributes, one by one (except Peeta, obviously)*
Soon, the only people left standing were....
The Volturi!
Ari!
Opal Koboi!
Aaaaand....Voldemort!
Suddenly, a portal to an alternate universe with a taste for evil opens up!
The Volturi: We will retuuuuurn!! *get sucked into portal*
Ari: This isn't over, Freeeaaaks!!!!! *gets sucked into portal*
Opal Koboi: I will have my reeeeveeengeeee!!! *gets sucked into portal*
Voldemort: Mwahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! *get sucked into portal*
Sounds of screaming and splashing is heard from portal. Suddenly, the portal spits out a shark.
Shark: Graaaaawgh!!!
Katniss, Artemis and Co., Harry, and Bella: AHHHH! *back away really fast*
Flock, except Angel: *shoots up into air*
Edward: Bad shark! *rips up tree and starts hitting shark on head repeatedly with it*
Bella: My hero! *gets all googly-eyed again*
Snow: *rolls eyes*
Angel: Stop hurting Steve!!!!
Nudge: Steve? Who's Steve?
Angel: *point at shark* He only wants to tap dance!
Max: The shark wants to tap dance?
Steve the Shark stood up on the end of his fin gracefully. All of our heroes watched in awe as Steve began majestically dancing around the clearing.
Max: I think we are on some experimental drug.
Snow: These people are quacks.
Angel: Up and away?
The rest of the Flock: Totally!
The Flock then proceeded to execute the "up" portion of their much overused maneuver.
Artemis: Nooo! *chases after Flock* Come back, Hybrids!!!! I want to study youuu!
Snow: *points at Artemis* Miniature Whitecoat!!! AHHHH!
The Flock then proceeded to fly away at top speed, until...
Voice: MAX GO MAKE CONNECTIONS!
Max: Change of plans! We're going to go make connections with those quacks down there!
At this point, "those quacks down there" noticed Max pointing at them, and proceeded to wave stupidly.
Snow: *sarcastically* Yay...
Max: So, who ARE you people, anyway?
Edward: I'm Edward Cullen, and this is my wife Bella.
Bella: We're vampires.
Max: Sure ya are.
Artemis: I'm Artemis Fowl, the young criminal mastermind.
Harry: I'm Harry Potter, The Boy Who Lived! Perhaps you've heard of me?
At which point everyone proceeded to stare at the Chosen One blankly.
Harry: Erm, maybe not then...
Katniss: I'm Katniss Everdeen.
Iggy: And...?
Katniss: I'm the only person who ever defied the Capitol and lived, One half of the only Two people to survive the Hunger Games.
Max: The Capitol? Like, Washington D.C.?
Snow: Hunger Games?
Katniss: Long story.
Artemis: So who are you, hybrids?
Max: We're The Flock. I'm Max. That's Fang, Iggy, Snow, Nudge, Gazzy, and Angel.
Total: Ahem!
Max: And Total. The talking dog.
Fang: We're...experiments.
Snow: *proudly* The first successful recombinants.
Edward: And you said we were quacks.
Gazzy: *muttering* You are.
Edward then took this opportunity to practice his death-glare on Gazzy. Gazzy was unphased.
Gazzy: You call that a death-glare?
Max: This is a death-glare.
Max then took this opportunity to demonstrate a proper death-glare. Our heroes, excluding The Flock, cowered in fear.
Steve: Grawwwr...
Angel: That's right Steve.
There was then an awkward silence.
Snow: Anyway...
Harry: Moving on...
Nudge: Omg! You know the anyway/moving on code???
Harry: Yep.
This marks the end of the first chapter of what could very well be the weirdest crossover ever.
Omg that was fun! It seemed to write itself. To clear up questions beforehand, Snow is the Institute bird-girl. I wrote a Fanfic about her, but I haven't posted it yet and I don't know if I will sooo....yeah. Kevin, Bubba, Jaybrams, Joe and Eyeball will come in next chapter, but I put them there because I'm not doing a whole new disclaima for each chapta. BUT WAIT I FORGOT SOMEONE I OWN! . Dr. MicMuffintop. Oh, and Jaybrams owns Beardy MicMisterMin. We made them up at my b-day party. They're cousins. Dr. McMuffintop is the only doctor for fictional characters in the world and Beardy MicMistermin is a caveman with an obsession for meatballs.
Soo anyway I will put up the next chappie as soon as possible, cuz I have it all written and stuff, but I want to know some people are reading this before I do. So Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, Review, and Rate. LoL Rate you're the misfit.
Rate: D:
Sorry, I had a psycho moment. But anyway BYEAS!
*press the button.....You know you want to....and if your jpfreak100 then you have to.... Press it.....*