Zekrom scrolled through the list of Fanfictions for some time.
"You find anything good?" Reshiram asked.
Zekrom slapped him in the face.
The two had been searching for, in human years, an hour, and they hadn't found any good fanfictions to read. Not like the others were bad, but they weren't very… savory. Then again, they were gods wanting high expectations.
Zekrom stopped when he saw a familiar name.
"Why'd you stop?" Reshiram asked him.
"Dude… 'Arceus the Critic- Season Two?!'" Zekrom read the title aloud.
He read it. Apparently Arceus had been being a critic on a few stories.
"Wow… the boss is a very good critic," Zekrom noticed.
Reshiram checked the description and pointed out, "It says it's a spinoff!"
Zekrom put in the origin of the story on the search bar.
"Whoa, everybody's a critic. Keldeo started this whole trend of fanfiction critics! Not just the boss, but also Meloetta, Genesect, and even Kyurem!"
"Why not us?"
"You're not seriously suggesting…"
"Yep! We go into the critic business, but with shipping!"
"I hate shipping… why did it have to be…"
"Oh, hey! I know the perfect one! Victini told me about it!"
Reshiram shoved Zekrom off the giant beanbag chair and typed in the name of a fanfiction and put it up.
Reshiram and Zekrom the Critics
Fennekin's Chance by Rio The Ice Queen
Warning: Don't read if you actually like Serena the way she is in the anime. Also, anti-Amourshipping, obviously. And implied character death.
Zekrom narrowed his eyes and said, "Well, we're done."
Reshiram grabbed Zekrom by the throat before he could leave.
"I wonder where Serena went…" Bonnie looked around, confused by the other girl's absence.
"There's a mistake right off the bat!" Zekrom pointed out. "It should be, 'Bonnie said while looking around blah blah!'"
"Who knows?" Ash, who was playing with his Goomy, spoke. "I'm just glad she isn't here to pant after me or something."
"Two sentences and Ash is already a bigger son of a (fart) than Paul," Zekrom grumbled.
"That is not Ash Ketchum," Reshiram gasped.
"What do you mean?" Clemont looked up from another invention of his.
"What do I mean? Didn't you notice how her eyes sparkle when she looks at me?"…
"No. She doesn't do that twenty-four seven," Zekrom said.
…Ash looked uncomfortable. "She also kept telling everyone that we met in the city that we were on a dating.."
Zekrom, perplexed, asked Reshiram, "Does the OOC Ash mean that Serena said they were on a date, or they were dating?"
Reshiram shrugged in confusion.
"…while all I was doing was trying to buy her a gift for her debut. This is why I don't fall for my female friends, it just gets… awkward."
Reshiram and Zekrom fell down at the complete OOCness of Ash.
"Resh, you're the expert on shipping. Ash wasn't trying to get Serena a gift on purpose, right?" Zekrom asked.
"Yep," Reshiram told him. "He got the bow he gave her by pure chance of being one millionth or something on a train ride. Don't remember all of the details, but that's what happened."
"Don't you like that Misty person?" Bonnie wondered, petting Dedenne. "I heard you talking about her in your sleep."
"Oh, I'm sure he does," Zekrom grumbled. "I'm sure he is when all of his muttering in his sleep only consists of food and winning the pokemon league."
"That was a crush." Ash said. "I didn't think she'd like me back… but now when a girl actually like me… it just feels off somehow…"
"Okay, I'm a heavy shipper and all, but Ash is way too dense to notice a girl liking him. Even more OOC," Reshiram grumbled.
"I'm only ten and all and putting romance over my dream sounds… weird."
Zekrom put his hands in the air in thankfulness and said, "Finally! Sounds like him for freaking once!"
Reshiram shook his head sadly and told him, "Actually, him mentioning romance is actually darn OOC."
Zekrom got on his knees and shouted dramatically, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"I guess so… I hardly heard of ten year olds dating." Clemont spoke calmly as Bonnie nodded, none of them having noticed a shadow (who had listened in to their conversation) disappearing.
"We all know who this 'shadow' is!" Zekrom shouted. "We could just say 'Serena disappearing' and it would work the same!"
Serena run crying, falling on her knees sniffling. "He… h-he…" she gasped when she heard rustling behind her and looked around to see a Pangoro.
Reshiram groaned loudly and complained, "This story's only for the use of Serena dying, is it?!"
"Wh-what?" The behemoth raised it's paw and struck down.
Reshiram facepalmed and said, "I rest my case."
"There was no need for the apostrophe in 'it's.' That's 'it is' not 'its' like it belongs to you," Zekrom pointed out.
"Let's go Fennekin!" Bonnie told the fox pokemon, holding Pancham's pokeball in her back. "Serena will catch up to us for sure!"
Reshiram's eyes began tearing up from the OOCness. Zekrom patted his back.
"I can't believe this 'Ice Queen'!" Zekrom shouted. "Since when do they wait for their friend, unlike their usual search for their missing friend?!"
"Yeah." Ash spoke, his Pikachu on one shoulder and his Goomy on the other. "Like she always does…" he muttered, as the three children began to walk toward the next town. Fennekin looked back into the dark forest for the last time before catching up to her new trainer, Ash.
THE END
"Is it over?" Zekrom asked.
Reshiram laughed giddily and announced, "Yes. Yes! It's over! Now we can…" Reshiram's hopeful face turned to despair. "No! There's still an AN!"
AN: If you guys liked it…
"Which we didn't!" Zekrom screamed.
…explaining Fennekin's adventures as one of Ash's Pokemon. R&R! :)
Zekrom banged his head on the table, and sighed in relief.
"Now the nightmare's over…" he mumbled.
Notes:
Zekrom's Notes: Ash was more OOC than anything I'd ever seen, and the idea that Fennekin's like 'I can't find my trainer. Oh well, time to go with Ash' was one big pile of (fart). The chances that some random pangoro is hanging around is just as stupid as a lampent smiling at you at the beach. I know it's the pokemon world, but the fact that a) it's a pangoro in the middle of nowhere and b) it doesn't ask questions but kills is a bit stupid. Plus, where were they? Were they walking or taking camp? Day or night? So little questions, none answered.
Reshiram's Notes: This was a bit of a hater's fic. It's like if I straight up wrote a story just for the sake of someone dying. I like the idea of Fennekin being Ash's pokemon, but still stupid way of making it happen. Plus, if they were taking camp, why would Serena be stalking them? And how is another good question. If they were taking camp, how would everybody have the chance to talk about how 'mushy' Serena is? And after all, she isn't all shiny eyed or whatever… This sounds like the Serena which is obsessed over Ash, which she truly is not.
Final Verdict:
Perfect for Serena haters. If not a hater, then don't read it. The 'what if' where Fennekin joins Ash is cool, but the rest of it goes with the rest of the crud in Jurassic Park.
"Now, I need to read some shipping before I continue…" Reshiram whimpered. "First one too…"
"I knew this would go south…" Zekrom growled.
THE END
Credits:
Keldeo the Critic- Season One
Special thanks:
Matthias Undiostres
Imperator Justinian
Mr. Grool