Daisies and Daffodils
Starsky went back every
year. Terri was the only non-Jewish woman he could have thought of
marrying; even his mother thought that this 'shiksa' was right for
him. He never put a stone on her grave - it didn't feel right; not
for her. He put a stone on his father's grave (or at least his mom
did it for him most years) but somehow his roots and traditions
pulled at him and so no stone for Terri.
Each year when he arrived
he stood by the grave in silence and waiting with bated breath for
the moment when she would re-appear in his mind's eye. He knew that
one year would come when he would no longer be able to conjure up her
face in all its detail. When he too would have changed with age...and
Terry would be ageless as the dead always are to those who are left
behind.
Every year Hutch came with him. The tall blond would
stand back and wait; watching his friend walk straight backed and
head held high to the mound of grass and the simple memorial and
Hutch would watch as Starsky's posture transformed with the weight of
all his grief. His shoulders sagged forward and his head dropped and
Hutch knew that the tears were flowing down his face.
Hutch knew
that Starsky's deep blue eyes would be red-rimmed when he returned to
the car.
He knew, and he could do nothing.
Starsky always
took the same offering.
He had brought her red roses when he
asked her to marry him.
If ever Starsky came to her grave at
another time of the year; he put a bunch of red roses in the stone
vase that he had bought and installed himself - taking the time to
choose exactly the right shape; and then crouching by the graveside
working with a trowel and cement to create a holder for it - a socket
that would hold it upright come rain or come shine.
He would
empty the dead flowers and replace the water from an old mineral
water bottle that he brought with him; then he would put the roses in
the vase and walk away.
That was if he came at other times of the year.
But each year; on the day she died; Starsky came to
Terry with his offering of love.
Each year, Hutch stood back and
watched his friend clean out the vase and replace the dead roses with
a huge bunch of giant white daisies.
And then Hutch watched as
Starsky sat on a nearby bench and wept.
Hutch always gave Starsky
a few minutes to express his desperate, eternal grief. Then he would
go up to Starsky and put a hand on his friend's solid shoulders.
Every year, Starsky would give Hutch the same red-blue stare and
walk back to the car.
Every year, Hutch would lay a bunch of
daffodils on the grave.
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