Scene 1: Saturday Night Live Cheerleaders
Scene: A duel between Harry and Draco. Ron and Hermione are sitting on the
sidelines dressed in red and yellow Gryffindor cheerleading outfits.
Hermione: They're getting ready to start. Ron, get up?
Ron: Ready?
Hermione: OK!
"Cha cha goochie, cha cha cha goochie, Cha cha goochie, cha cha cha goochie roll
call!"
Ron: My name is Ron,
My wand is gone,
When it's my turn to duel,
I'm in the john.
"Cha cha goochie, cha cha cha goochie, Cha cha goochie, cha cha cha goochie roll
call!"
Hermione: My name's Hermione
I won the charms bee,
Hogwarts, a History,
Is the book for me.
"Cha cha goochie, cha cha cha goochie, Cha cha goochie, cha cha cha goochie roll
call!"
Both: We cheer for Gryffindor,
We didn't vote for Al Gore,
Stupefying is our score,
Just listen to Harry's roar!
Flashes of light; gasps are heard from the crows.
Hermione: Look, Harry's down. What do we do?
Ron: I don't know. (He puts his arm around her) But I'm sure we'll think of
something.
Hermione: Thanks Ron, for the encouragement, but doesn't Harry need our
Gryffindor spirit even more. (He's not really listening but looking at her
chest)
Ron: Um, there was something that I was meaning to ask you. Are you still with
Draco, or do you want to...
Hermione: Draco is a horn toad. He told everyone that I still sleep with a
nightlight. But I don't like you like that. You're my friend. I don't like
you like that.
Ron: It's ok, there's still Lavender, but I hear she stuffs her bra. Oh no,
Harry's still down. Do you know what he needs?
Hermione: Some pepper up potion.
Ron: No, silly. THE PERFECT CHEER!
Stupefy, liquefy, jelly legs and more
Gryffindor lions are brave to the core...
Harry: Ummph!!
Harry and Draco: Stupefy!!! Live from Hogwarts, it's Saturday night!