Is this the end?

by MandyHanazuka

Matthew Williams (Canada) (c) Hidekaz

For so long, Matthew Williams had been invisible to the entire world. Never noticed, never seen, never recognized. All he ever truly wanted was for a family that can see him for who he was. But what really happened was his family that he had saw him as a ghost for a moment, then forget he was ever there.

Matthew Williams sat at the edge of his bed, glancing at the clock. Midnight. Was it that late already? In his hands, something shone brightly in the moonlight. Yes. It was that late.

"Hey you guys! I'm so sorry I am late, I forgot to set my alarm so I had to hurry out of bed just to get here!" His voice was lost in the sea of voices.

It was now or never. And there was no turning back. By the time anyone actually noticed his absence, he would be gone. He had his doubts about anyone missing him, and he was sure that it was true.

"Hey raise your hands if you have something to say about the trip? Better yet, raise your hand if you are going on the trip!" Germany had yelled to the crowd of nations. Only 63 people were going, including Canada. "Alright, 62 people." He gave a smile and wrote it down.

Just how long had he been through this? How long had he been nothing but the background, the wallpaper, the 'ghost'. He couldn't remember how far back. When raised by Francis, his life was easy. He was just a child, not knowing what was going on in the real world. Not knowing what was going on outside his home. His child mind couldn't comprehend what was in store for him when he got older.

The young blond boy set his little polar bear down and climbed off his bed, heading for the kitchen. His father, Francis, was sitting at the table, crying, muttering phrases in French. Something about his love, a woman, being murdered. Little Mattieu didn't know... He didn't know how that could turn his entire life upside down. All starting from one... Single... murder.

Life hadn't been the same since that night. He fended for himself since then. Francis even gave his custody over to Arthur Kirkland. The boy didn't even know who he was, or why he even cared to have him. It wasn't until he arrived that he realized that he was adopted to be the brother/playmate of the young, popular lad named Alfred Jones. Or in other words, the soon to be popular America.

Mattie stared at the blond in front of him. This was his new 'brother'? He was supposed to play with him? He was absolutely terrified! The boy looked like he could crush the poor little Canadian in an instant! What terrified him the most was the boy's strength. Lifting, and even SPINNING, a bison. That much strength and power had an impact on Mattie that would lodge itself in his heart. But the boy seemed fond of Mattie and played with him, took notice of him, and was even kind to him. One day they played, Arthur Kirkland watching from the doorway, his eyes glued to Alfred. "Time to put the toys away, Alfred. We'll go get some lunch and head out for a little fun." He gave him a warm, genuine smile, one that made people just want to smile back. Which is exactly what Alfred did as he picked up the toys and ran over to Arthur. "Oh but what about Mattie? Can he come too?"

The only response he received from Arthur was... "Sure. Your little invisible friend can come too."

"Oh but... Hes not invisible! Hes right there!"

Mattie's heart sunk when he realized that Arthur wasn't noticing him. His spirit fell when Arthur scoffed and played with Alfred, talking about what a crazy imagination Alfred had. Calling him an imaginary friend. This is when the pain really started.

Ever since he had realized that he was nothing to the world, his consciousness was falling deeper and deeper into the depression. It was a dark hole that threatened to arise up and engulf Mattie in the darkness, the pain, to just lose himself in the void of nothingness. Sure. That is what he was wasn't he? Absolutely nothing. He tried and attempted to talk to his 'brother' so many times, but was constantly brushed off. Either he had gone unnoticed or, when his brother did notice, told him to just relax and that everything was going to be fun, everything will be A-OK. Nothing was ever 'A-OK'. Just when things were going even more downhill, Mattie... Had finally succumbed to the darkness, the despair, the agony... The loneliness.

He clutched the knife in one hand, biting his fingers of the other. This was his only way out. His only escape. Mattie chuckled darkly when he though that no one would miss him. When he thought that nothing mattered anymore.

His hand raised, lifting the knife to his palm and sliced across the skin, tearing the flesh. His legs shook as he got up and wandered over to the walls. His stuff had already been packed, his polar bear was already waiting for him. He had lost Kumajirou to an accident. Someone had shot and killed Kuma, thinking that he was a wild beast. That was the straw that finally broke the camels back, after hundreds of years. He had lost his last, and only, best friend. Dipping his fingers into the blood on his palm, he wrote onto the white walls. His arm moved in rhythmic patterns, flowing gracefully through the writing. His life was nothing but bitterness. Once the words were written in his own blood, the knife connected with his wrist. His tears fell from his muave eyes, sinking into his clothing, his favorite orange sweat shirt. The sting of the knife slicing open his wrist made Matthew laugh. The pain. The agony. It hurt. But Mattie didn't care. The pain of losing his life was the escape he had been looking for. Maybe if things had been different, he wouldn't have ended like this.

Mattie's body fell to the floor, knife dropping next to him. The light in his eyes, that once shown warmth, kindness, and hidden sorrow began to fade, his breath escaping his body. His last breath. Soon, his blood formed a red puddle around him, staining the once golden but now dull blond hair red, staining his clothing. His skin, so fair and smooth, warm with life, grew cold and lifeless. His still open eyes drooped until they shut, his lungs stopped breathing... His heart... Stopped... Beating.

Matthew Williams

Born: July 1st

Died: March 10th