Disclaimer: Don't own them, blah, blah. They belong to J.K. Rowling.
Notes: Set during OotP. Written as if Remus and Sirius were never together as a couple. Short, I know, but I wanted it to be short. And if you flame because Sirius seems too selfish in this I will eat your head. :D I think Sirius is much more selfish than people are willing to accept.
Just a Kiss
By Bohemian Storm
He hadn't wanted anything more than a simple escape. When the house had begun to close in around him and his mother's voice was constantly in his ears, he had begged for an escape. He had used his friend's vulnerability to let him out. He knew Moony would never say no to him. They had wrangled with each other for nearly an hour, both arguing the points for their side. He knew he'd win. He always won.
And when he did win, he didn't think it was so wrong to lean forward and kiss his friend full on the mouth. It was just another way to escape his world that had become so monotonous, so incredibly boring.
He wanted release.
Moony had stared at him and he had grinned mischievously before going to find his wand. He hadn't thought about the feelings of his friend, he hadn't even bothered to stop and think about what he had done. He had kissed his best friend, prodding at startled lips with his tongue and turned the kiss into something deeper than he'd intended.
It hadn't mattered though. They were going to fight, to save people. They'd talk when they got back. He didn't want Moony to think it had meant anything. It was just a kiss . . . just a kiss. How many times had he shared 'just a kiss' with someone? It was no different with Moony. No different at all.
As he had grabbed his wand he thought fleetingly of the look in Moony's eyes when they had parted. He thought about the way the gold flecks seemed to shimmer and wondered if his friend had been about to cry. Then he had pulled his wand free of the pile of clothing it was buried under and grinned. He was finally going to escape. He had been so excited and the kiss was gone from his mind.
It had been just a kiss, after all.
They had fought side by side. He knew they would win. They always won. It was simply the way the world worked. Good fought Evil, Good lost some wonderful people to Evil, but Good always came out on top. He didn't think this time would be any different.
And it wasn't. Good still fought Evil and Good still lost someone.
He didn't think about his words. He didn't think about Moony or Harry or anyone. He just thought about being free and how wonderful it felt to be outside and fighting again. He was so sure they'd win, so sure that he'd return home that night and they'd all be there. Battered and a little bruised, perhaps, but they would be there.
Nothing ever happens the way it was planned.
When she hit him with the stun he thought of the kiss. When he tumbled backward and felt nothing but cold, his eyes went to Moony. Time seemed to freeze completely and he found the answer to a question he hadn't even known he had asked. It hadn't been just a kiss. Not to Moony, not to him. It had been the kiss, the only kiss they'd ever share.
The cold swallowed him and he knew he had ruined everything. He had been too selfish and he had destroyed lives. He had destroyed someone's heart.
He heard Harry call his name. He heard Moony say he was gone.
He felt his heart break.
He had his release.
End