He was slowly breaking.
Falling apart more and more with every touch, every kiss.
But there was also that certain longing.
The sense that he would completely break down without it.
And that was why he couldn't let go. Even though he knew he would eventually have to, and it would hurt all the more when he did.
So that was why he couldn't move away when those warm lips were pressed against his own.
And every time that happened, he wanted to cry. He wanted to scream and howl and just never stop.
But he couldn't.
And then he was pulled into that man's arms, his cheek resting on his lover's chest.
Oz swallowed, tears brimming in his eyes. "G-Gil..."
"What's wrong?"
"C-Can I cry now?"
Then those warm arms held him even tighter, the man's voice quivering slightly as he spoke. "Y-yeah, Oz..."
The tears brimmed over and the small boy cried. He cried more than ever.
But the feeling inside him was no longer sadness. It was no longer yearning.
It was a sense of affection that he knew he didn't deserve. It was the sense of knowing, knowing that he was needed. Knowing that it was all okay as long as that person was there.
Knowing that he was loved.
Gil.
The reason he couldn't resist.
His reason for being.