Notes: So, unintentionally, I've ended up doing a series of prequel one-shots to my villain Deku fic, "heroes in the dark". I've got another one halfway done, but that one is Izuocha and is set before Deku's "death", like "Gentle". This one is set much afterwards and focuses on both Uraraka's and Bakugou's emotional recovery, which they ended up working on together. There really isn't much shipping in this until the end, as it was important to showcase how they've grown since suffering tragedy. I wasn't planning on writing this, but then youseimanami on tumblr showed me this absolutely beautiful Uraraka piece that she was working on and it totally inspired me. When she told me that she'd actually been using my fic as inspiration for it, well, what else could I do but write something to go with it? This is our second collaboration and the third piece she's done for this (now) series. I couldn't be more excited and honored!
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Ten months. It had been ten months since Deku had fallen into that ocean and never come back out. Well, technically, it had been a few days more than that, but who was counting? Probably Uraraka. They didn't talk about it on their morning run, of course, but he could tell that it was in her head from the lack of talking coming from her end. Normally, she chatted almost the entire time, a near constant stream of thoughts straight from her brain. It helped with her breathing apparently.
Back in school, that would've peeved him and he wouldn't have been able to run with her. Now though, he was used to it. They went on runs together at least every other week. He didn't go as fast or as long as he usually did, but then he needed a cool down day at some point. She had never been fond of running and still wasn't. That had been Deku's thing, not hers, although she had still put time in on the sidewalk or on a treadmill. Bakugou liked to do trails, so that was what they were doing now, running through the woods on the edge of the city. She always let him pick where they went, but he let her set the pace.
Uraraka slowed down to a stop when they came to a turn that would either take them back or lead them further into the woods. Bakugou hated stopping and they weren't even halfway through the length they normally ran, but when he saw her eyes focus on the city, he knew what she was thinking before she even said it. "Can we head back early today?" she asked, not looking at him. Despite her chest heaving as she sucked in air, her voice was quiet.
"Got some exciting plans you didn't tell me about?" Bakugou inquired, only half-interested.
She shook her head. "I'm not hanging out with Tsu until later tonight." Uraraka ran a hand over her ponytail and then brushed her bangs out of her face. "I'm just… I don't know. My head's not in it." She turned to face him and put on an apologetic smile. "Sorry for wasting your time."
"Eh, I'll just go harder tomorrow," Bakugou told her.
"You don't have to stop because of me," Uraraka said. "I can make it back on my own and relax while you finish up."
"And have Kirishima accuse me of not being a gentleman when you accidentally let it slip?" Bakugou scoffed and started back for the lot where he'd parked the car. "I don't think so."
Uraraka smiled as she stepped up to walk at his side. "I wouldn't tell on you."
"He'd find out somehow," Bakugou replied. "He always does."
It wasn't that he didn't trust her. He knew that she could take care of herself. Even after a two mile run, she would be able to kick some serious ass. She'd jumped ranks recently and was making waves. No one could question her on how strong she was. She was doing great. She was absolutely fine. She wasn't letting anything hold her back.
Sometimes though, she was deeply sad and wouldn't tell anyone. This was one of those moments.
The rest of her day played out in his mind as they walked. She would sit silently in his car, looking out the window and pay little attention to the radio. After dropping her off at her apartment and apologizing again for cutting the run short, she would take a shower, then maybe pick up around her place. When it got close to the time she was supposed to hang out with Asui, she'd send a text saying that she wasn't feeling well and apologize again. Maybe she'd eat some leftovers or not even eat at all. With the sun down, she'd crawl into bed, but instead of sleeping, watch movies listlessly until she drifted off.
She mood was so easy to read when she was like this, radiating this desperate desire to be alone but also need for someone to be with her. She didn't want to admit that though. After all, time had passed. Ten months had come and gone. She should be fine by now. She should be okay, even if he knew that she would never fully move on. Deku had been her first love and always would be. It was stupid for her to act like she had to be doing great all the time. She still apologized if she cried even a little.
It wasn't right for her to feel like her lingering pain was a burden when guilt still rose in the back of his throat like bile if he thought about it too much.
In times like these, Todoroki was the best one to call. Maybe he'd had the emotional range of celery when they had first started at U.A., but his quiet and steadfast demeanor was the best way to combat Uraraka when she was like this. Bakugou couldn't have said why, but besides Asui, he thought that Todoroki might have been the greatest help. Something about the two of them together helped them both heal. If Bakugou didn't talk about how Deku's death had affected him, Todoroki was even worse. He'd only spoken with Uraraka about it. Helping him helped her.
In the beginning, it had felt like that was all they could do.
Unfortunately, he knew that Todoroki was out of the country. Hadn't Uraraka said that he'd gone to Russia or Siberia or somewhere equally ridiculous? Many of the top heroes branched out over the world these days instead of sticking to one city. They'd been far from home that night. The waves crashing against the cliff, the pouring rain, and the lightning still echoed in his head if he woke up in the dark.
He could call Asui, but then Uraraka would know that he was worrying over her. Not that he worried. It would frustrate her though. She hated coming off as weak. It wasn't - she wasn't - but he could completely understand why she hid how she felt.
"You hungry?" Bakugou asked once they were back on concrete.
"Mm, a little, I guess," Uraraka admitted.
"I'm fucking starving," Bakugou said. "Didn't eat enough breakfast, I think."
Uraraka mock-gasped. "You didn't eat enough to prepare yourself for our run? I'm shocked."
"I brought protein bars," Bakugou replied defensively. To be honest, he wasn't that hungry and he could have survived off of what he brought, but this wasn't about him. He'd learned a lot about being selfless in his last year at U.A., something that truly made a hero, but he had never really put it into practice. It had been strange at first, but now, well… It made him a stronger person.
Rolling her eyes at him, Uraraka pulled her hair out of her ponytail and then ran her fingers through it until her hair was settled the way she liked. It was a nice spring day, not too hot with the sun not fully up and a good breeze in the air. Her cheeks were still a little flushed from the run, but after the slow walk down the hill, she looked close to back to normal. She was wearing shorts and a lavender t-shirt, loose but swooping in the back. She'd needed new tennis shoes. He had gotten onto her about buying trail running shoes if they kept going where he liked to run, but she had put it off. Getting her to spend money on herself was like pulling teeth. Deku had bought those shoes for her over a year ago.
"There are a few restaurants nearby," Uraraka pointed out. "Want to just walk and pick one?"
"Gotta make up for my lack of running somehow," Bakugou sighed.
Uraraka lightly punched him in the arm. "I said I was sorry and that you could go on without me!" She didn't sound upset or angry though and there was a small smile on her face. He gave her a look that suggested her hit had done very little to hurt him and kept on walking.
The only time they talked as they walked was to point out where to eat. He would've gone anywhere, but it felt good to just walk around too. To be honest, his legs were fairly sore, along with his shoulders, and this was supposed to be his light day. He'd been pushing himself a lot recently. Maybe too much, although he would never cop to such a thing. A person's quirk was only as strong as their body and he had to be stronger. He had to be. He couldn't afford to fail like that again. He couldn't handle another fall.
When Uraraka came to a sudden halt, Bakugou almost didn't catch it since she'd been a step behind him. He noticed her stop out of the corner of his eyes and did the same, turning around to look at her. "What's the hold up?"
Instead of answering him though, Uraraka kept looking at the ground. Furrowing his brow, he followed her gaze until it landed on a single white rose lying on the sidewalk. The stem was long, like the ones used in bouquets, and despite being on the ground, there wasn't a speck of dirt on the petals seen. They looked soft and glowed brightly against the dull gray. It made him think of their first year, when they'd gone to that island, and she'd had that rose in her hair and his vest had a matching pattern.
"What?" Bakugou prompted.
"It must've fallen out of someone's flower arrangement," Uraraka said, her eyes still locked on it. "They didn't even notice it was gone and probably won't until later."
"I hope eleven roses is as effective as a dozen," Bakugou replied. His comment didn't even put a dent in her focus. She wasn't just seeing a lone rose on the ground, dropped and left behind to wither and die. He had known that her mind was elsewhere, but he hadn't thought it was this bad. It made him feel guilty for thinking that he should call Todoroki. He could be supportive too.
Uraraka's expression was soft as she quietly said, "It's all alone. It's so...sad."
No, the rose wasn't sad, not in his opinion, but she was. There was something about that expression on her face that twisted his stomach into knots and he couldn't take it. Not knowing what else to do, Bakugou did the only thing that popped in his mind. He bent down and picked up the rose, careful to avoid any thorns. There weren't any, having been cleaned by the florist, and he twirled the stem in between the pads of his middle finger and thumb to examine the petals. There was a little dirt where it had been touching the ground, but after gently brushing it off, they looked as pristine as they had been while on the bush.
Bakugou held out the rose to her. "Here."
Uraraka took the rose almost unconsciously, her hand rising to pluck it out of his grasp only because he held it out to her in the first place. Instead of looking sad, her brown eyes shined as she gazed at the flower carefully and then a smile lit up her face. When Uraraka pulled her gaze away from the rose and put it on him, he felt the back of his neck and his face warm, but he ignored it.
"Now it's not alone," Bakugou said, his voice gruffer than he would've liked it to be.
"That's so sweet," Uraraka replied teasingly.
Bakugou glared at her. "Don't push it. I just didn't want you to bring it up repeatedly." She would have too, at least twice, and she knew it.
All she did was shrug her shoulders, but the smile didn't leave her face. "Let's go to that place on the corner. They've got mochi."
"It's too early for dessert," Bakugou told her.
Uraraka gasped. "You take that back!" Instead of waiting for him, she laughed and started for the little cafe.
Bakugou stared after her. There was a noticeable change in her, more energy in her step and she was even humming under her breath. She twirled the rose in between her fingers, careful not to touch it with all five pads of her fingertips. Somehow, he knew, with just a small and honestly dumb action, he had managed to change the course of her day. Everything he'd thought she would do later was gone. She would lock herself away from the world tonight, not when there was still light and beauty in it.
However, when Uraraka turned her head back around to look at him, her hair swaying in the breeze and the sunlight shining brightly behind her, Bakugou's throat constricted and he felt frozen on the spot. "Come on, slowpoke!" she called out after him cheerfully, her forearm held against her chest so that the rose was close to her cheek.
Shaking his head, Bakugou jogged lightly to catch up. "Yeah, yeah, look who's talking." She bumped him with her shoulder when he reached her side and then they started for the cafe together.
It hadn't been much. He could've done so much more. Asui was better at this. Iida was better. Kirishima was better. Hell, Todoroki was better and he barely talked. None of them were here though. It was just him and he knew that it was important to be here and present - to be here for her as she had been there for all of them. She'd held onto the others as they mourned. She stayed strong for them. She went to work, day in and day out, kicking ass and saving lives. He could do something as simple as pick up a flower, give it to her, and change her entire day.
Sometimes Bakugou forgot that being a hero wasn't just about huge saves or epic villain takedowns.
Sometimes it was just helping a friend get out of bed and making a small gesture to give them hope. He could do that for her. He'd do that for as long as she needed because he knew damn well that she would do the same and Deku would have as well. Bakugou clenched his fists at his side and then relaxed them. Yeah, it was exactly something Deku would've done to help.