Just another fruit of my existential crisis. WARNING: major character death ahead. Don't like, don't read and then scold me for being depressing.
Set somewhere during the ending scenes of IM3.
When Killian told her that he was going to rip out Tony's pathetic, sentimental little heart and hand it over to her, Pepper couldn't help sobbing her soul out, her pride be damned. When he started injecting her with yet another dose of Extremis, and telling her that it would actually be her who was going to do it to Tony, she could swear that her heart stopped. She felt the drug taking over her body, and she knew that there was nothing she would be able to do to stop this. She tried to think, the way that Tony would. Maybe there was a lever she could pull to stop this, or a loose cable somewhere that could disrupt the process if she only managed to reach it somehow…
Seconds later, Tony was no longer an inspiration, a lighthouse that would provide shelter. He was merely a target. A target of yet another Extremis soldier; one that needed to be eliminated immediately.
It didn't take her long to find him. She no longer cared about him, but she still knew him well enough to predict where he would go and what he would do. The scientist was sitting hunched over a gauntlet of his suit, his back leaning against the wall. He looked up immediately when he heard the cling of Pepper's shoes on the metal railing. Suddenly, his face was beaming with happiness and excitement, as opposed to the grim seriousness from only seconds earlier.
'Pepper…?' he whispered in disbelief, and propping himself up with one hand, he stood up immediately and took a stride towards her. For some reason she was tempted to shy away from his gentle touch, but this was all part of the plan and thanks to his own childish and naïve attitude, her mission would be accomplished soon enough. 'How did you manage to escape? Me and Rhodey were…Oh God, Peps, I'm so sorry,' Tony could not stop rambling incoherently. He had been rescued from the hands of terrorists, escaped death by palladium poisoning and managed to end an alien invasion for crying out loud, but he had never felt so relieved before in his entire life.
'Come here honey,' she whispered. He looked surprised, as if he had been expecting her to be angry. Pepper was worried for a flash, fearing that Tony might see through her plan and try to stop it. Her concerns were unfounded however, because seconds later he was holding her close, nuzzling his face into her shoulder and almost crying with relief, having abandoned the part of his suit he had been cradling – a gesture which would have had truly symbolic meaning for Pepper, had it not been for the Extremis. She knew he would never defend himself anyway, not from her.
As Tony's strong arms wrapped protectively around her, Peppers fingers tightened their grip on the trigger of a gun that Killian had given her and as the scientist started rubbing her back to comfort her visibly tense body, she pulled it.
The moment the gunshot rang out, Pepper felt her head spin. She couldn't tell where she was or what she was doing . Her head hurt and her whole body also felt incredibly uncomfortable…as if she was on fire. Then it hit her like a brick was; she remembered the kidnapping, the threats, what Killian said about killing…'Tony,' she whispered more to herself than anyone else.
Pepper's attention snapped back to the present moment when she heard a quiet grunt, and looked down to see Tony kneeling in front of her, with a confused and hazy expression on his face.
'Pepper?' he whispered, his voice sounding pleading and broken. 'Peps…'
She saw the wet red patch spreading on his white shirt, when her fingers slipped off the gun she was holding, and the device hit the metal floor with a loud, metalic thud. Realisation of what had just occurred was dawning in on her, and without thinking about it, Pepper sank down to her knees, supporting Tony's weakening body with her arms.
She drew him close to her, and held him so tightly, that she could thankfully feel the faint beating of his heart. Pepper could swear that they were sitting like this for an eternity, when Tony's hand brushed her cheek gently and he smiled at her. Tears were streaming down her face, and he was evidently trying to wordlessly reassure her that there was no need to cry. His actions had a completely adverse effect. The smile he gave her, was not a sad, pitying one. It was Tony's genuine grin, beaming happiness and joy that was reserved only for Pepper. And it was not fair.
She shot him and he was still happy to see her. What a lovable idiot.
'Tony, we need to get help, we need to…Where is Rhodey? Oh God, oh dear…' Pepper could not put her thoughts together, let alone build coherent sentences. 'Do you have a phone on you?' she managed to spit out finally.
'No, Peps. It's okay,' he whispered, still smiling at her. She could not believe what she was seeing: the expression on his face was merely tinged with pain and disappointment, but his eyes were still glittering, as they did when they kissed on the roof after the Vanko-incident, as they did when she agreed to move in with him… 'Happy…he will wake up and take care of you…a-and there's Rhodey as well…' Tony's voice was small, but still confident and firm. 'It's okay Pepper. Just…just hold me…yeah, this is good…'
'I…I…' Pepper tried to speak, hoping to explain that it wasn't her, that she would never do this to him, but her vocal cords refused to obey and all that she managed was a sob, that only distressed Tony further. He tried to move, to hold her still and calm her down, but his body disagreed with him and his agonised whine was the first visible indication she got, that he was actually in any pain.
'It's okay, honey. It's okay… And it…I know it wasn't y-you…it was Killian, damn the bastard. You hear m-me…?' his voice started faltering, and Pepper's hand instinctively travelled up to his head, to run her fingers soothingly through his spiky hair. 'Don't blame yourself…please…'
Pepper sobbed even harder, when Tony managed to fight off the fatigue again, only to smile at her and hold her hand in his.
'Just…just remember that it's not your fault, ok? I should have looked b-better af-fter you, I,' Tony wanted to continue his litany of pleas, but only now did he start to feel the gravity of the injury. He had known that a bulled right to his abdomen, fired from such a close range was going to kill him, but now he had to admit, that dying wasn't the most comfortable of things. It felt like being back at MIT with Rhodey: he knew he had to stay awake to prep for his exams, but some of the books were so boring, that his eyes closed of their own accord and…
And then somebody slapped him. He realised it was Pepper when his eyes came back to focus. She was looking down at him, the only readable expression on her face being concern.
'Please Tony, don't go to sleep. You mustn't go to sleep,' she was whispering frantically right into his ear. 'I'm sorry Tony, I'm so sorry…' Pepper could no longer suppress the overwhelming panic, when she was talking. Her petite body hunched over him appeared merely as a blur. Tony was no longer able to see the tears rolling down her cheeks, or the desperation in her deep blue eyes.
He felt life slipping away slowly, together with the precious crimson-red liquid that was gushing out of the wound. He gasped when Pepper pressed her hands against the injury to stop the bleeding and tried to push her hand away. He knew it was over and…
'The only thing I regret is t-that I won't h-have an-ny more time to spend with you…nothing more, Pep .Not your..f-fault. Iloveyou…' by the end of the sentence he could no longer muster the strength to separate the words and articulate them clearly.
He knew that regardless of what he said, and regardless of what the facts were, Pepper would blame herself for what happened. He wished he could live, just so that he could be there for her when she needed him most, but his eyelids just felt so heave…Surely, it would do him no harm to just rest for a moment…
'Rhodey will finish this, he'll get help. You'll be fine Tony, I promise,' Pepper managed to whisper through the tears, knowing that those were just empty words. 'I'm s-sorry…' she kept apologising. 'Please, just hold on Tony, ok?'
Tony nodded slightly in reply, trying to distract her from the reality of what she, or actually Killian, just did. He could feel hardly anything, see only blurred shapes and fight hard to understand the words spoken to him. He felt moisture trickling down his chin and buried his face in the fabric of Pepper's shirt to hide the blood from her eyes. She already had too much on her plate to deal with. Still, he was grateful that he wasn't dying alone, that the person holding his cooling body was Pepper and not a nurse at an old people's house, that he could hardly feel any pain because laying close to her body was the most comfortable thing in the world.
If he could just be given a day, a week…just to make it easier for her and give her time to forgive herself…if he could just…fight…the wariness….and the pain…and j-just…stay awake…a little…longer…if he could only…kiss her one...more…
'It's all right Pepper, I love you…it's all right,' he whispered with great effort.
When he went completely limp with a gentle smile on his lips, Pepper started sobbing even harder and shaking his shoulders frantically. He didn't make the slightest movement of acknowledgment even when she slapped his face, but she would bet her own life, that when she whispered their last 'I love you', his fingers tightened around hers.
Yeah. Done. By the time I finished it I actually started feeling better, but I've posted it anyway. Sorry.