In Pieces, a supernatural fanfic

Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or its characters

A/N: Tag to the episode Nightmare. Sam and Dean try to come to terms with the events at the Millers.

I would like to say a big THANK YOU to my Beta buttercupgalaxy who has always been a great support.

It took a lot for Dean Winchester to freak out, but here he was, sitting in a bar, on his third beer freaking out

It took a lot for Dean Winchester to freak out; but here he was, sitting in a bar, on his third beer freaking out! He had unwillingly left Sam behind at the motel, his little brother promising that he was going to turn in early, and that yes, as per the fourth time Dean had asked, he was feeling fine, if anything just a little tired.

Dean watched as a girl walked passed him, smiling as she went by. Usually this would have had him out of his seat and giving her his best moves, after all right now he was off the clock and was in his down time; but he couldn't even will himself to turn his head to watch her as she walked away. He closed his eyes and dropped his head to the bar – God this was bad.

Sam had asked him in the car if he was freaked and he couldn't believe how hard it was for him to put his game face on for his little brother and say no. He had spent his entire life ensuring that he always maintained the façade; the one that told Sam everything would be ok and left no room for doubt. Tonight, however, when his brother had needed him, Dean had faltered, if for only a second; but he knew it was enough for Sam not to truly believe him. As if that wasn't enough, the fact that Sam had freaky ESP vision things just wasn't helping.

It wasn't that he was scared of Sam; that thought had never crossed his mind, but he was scared of the consequences for his brother. Watching the pain that Sam had been in while having the visions was bad enough; but as with the case of Max Miller, seeing the guilt of his death eat away at him was unbearable.

So far Sam had had six visions, well that he knew of anyway, and only in the case of two had they been able to change the outcome for the better. Dean had often wondered if the universe had something against his family and right now he was sure that somebody was having a good laugh at their expense.

His job had always been to look after his brother: protect him from whatever out there wanted to cause him harm, whether it was schoolyard bullies, a pissed off spirit or even Sam's own self destructive tendencies, that was his job and it was something that he was very good at, a skill that he was very proud of, though that all changed now. How could he protect Sam from the onslaught of visions that took their toll on him physically and mentally?

Lifting his head from the bar, he decided that it was time to head back to the motel; the beer really wasn't doing anything to lift his spirits, in fact it was actually making it worse.

Arriving back at the motel, he expected Sam to be sound asleep, so he was surprised to find the room empty. Moving towards the bathroom, he listened out for the shower but no sound was emanating from behind the door.

"Sam, you in there?" Dean called out as he knocked on the door. Receiving no response he tried again.

"Sam, if you don't open up I'm coming in." Dean tried; knowing that the last thing Sam would want was his big brother storming in. Again the only answer that Dean received was silence. Leaving him no option, he slowly opened the door and poked his head into the room, nothing.

Dean knew that Sam was a grown man, and was more than capable of handling himself but as he looked around the empty bathroom and the empty room with no sign of a note from his brother letting him know where he was, he began to panic slightly.

It was standard procedure; one of the few that Sam actually followed without questioning, one that they had grown up with and although his brother had been away for a while, once back he had returned to the habit of making sure that Dean would know where he was.

Panic building inside him, he took a calming breath; the realisation that he needed to focus now slamming into him, as now was not the time to loose it. Pulling out his cell, he hit the speed dial for Sam, a moment later he heard his brother's phone begin to ring from behind him. Turning he saw it sitting on top of their Dad's journal. He told himself that it was still not the time to panic as he scanned the room; he took note that nothing seemed out of place since he left, there was no sign of a struggle, which if someone or something tried to take his brother against his will, Sam would have put up one hell of a fight. The door didn't look tampered with, Sam's jacket was gone, and it looked as if his brother had simply left under his own steam.

Dean was in two minds, now that he was fairly certain that Sam had left on his own, should he go in search for his brother or wait it out at the motel for him to come back? Remembering the look on his brother's face when the police were talking to Mrs Miller, he decided that he couldn't just sit back and wait for Sam.

Pulling out a pen and some paper, he left a note for Sam in bold letters for his brother to see, if he got back before him.

Sam, gone out looking for your ass. Not impressed that you didn't leave a note or take your phone with you.

If you get back before me, call me geek boy. We'll talk about your lack of communication skills when I get back. Dean.

With that, Dean walked out the door in search of his brother, hoping to find him before his little brother let the guilt from recent events overwhelm him.

Sam had watched Dean leave reluctantly, and was grateful when he walked out the door. Knowing that Dean and bar equalled a very late night or, as on more than one occasion, a very early morning, he knew that he had time before his brother came back.

He felt so wound up that he couldn't stand it anymore. The tension running along his shoulders was actually beginning to give him a headache. Deciding that a shower might help him work out the kinks and throbbing ache, he headed towards the bathroom.

The feeling of the hot spray running along his back was beginning to relieve some of the pressure from his muscles, and for the first time since he had began to have the latest bunch of visions, he felt that he was finally clean. Shutting the water off, he exited the shower and dried himself off before getting into a pair of tracksuit bottoms and a hoodie.

Lying back on the bed, he flicked on the television, when suddenly, he was back at the Miller house, watching Max kill Dean, watching Max kill himself and then as abruptly as it came, the scene in front of him changed again, and there she was, the woman who had been haunting him for the last few months. There was his Jessica; pinned to the ceiling, asking the question she always asked, the question that he had been asking himself since the night she died – Why?

He woke with a gasp, the television still on in the background. The air around him seemed to be scarce and he struggled to draw breath. He needed to get out; he was suffocating in the room. Grabbing his jacket from where he had thrown it on the chair, he hurried out the door.

Once outside, he leaned back into the door, taking a deep breath. All of a sudden the emotion of his nightmare over took him, his energy waned and he slid down the door to the ground.

Hadn't it been only six months ago that his whole future had been pretty much mapped out for him? Now everything lay in ruins - Jess was dead, their Dad was still missing and he had turned into some kinda freak. Even Dean was scared, and that thought terrified him cause he was the most fearless person that he knew.

Getting to his feet, Sam began to walk, not quite sure where he was going; but knowing that he needed some time to think.

Dean had been wandering around the town for a half an hour with still no sign of his brother, which was quite funny since the town was relatively small and his brother was relatively big and kinda hard to miss. He was thinking about heading back to the motel to see if Sam had shown up, knowing that realistically if Sam was back at the motel he would have called by now, when he noticed a hunched figure sitting by the lake. He knew instinctively that it had to be Sam, cause seriously what were the chances of two people in this town having an emo moment by the side of a lake at the same time?

Moving towards the lake he saw his brother staring ahead, and realised that Sam didn't seem to know that he was beside him. Carefully putting his hand gently on his brother's shoulder, he called his name to get his attention.

"Sammy?" Dean asked quietly, noticing his brother jump slightly at the sound of his voice and hand on his shoulder. He watched as Sam turned to face him and smiled.

"What happened Dean, you get shot down?" Sam asked, slightly startled, looking at his brother as if waiting for a reaction.

"As if. I mean this is your fantastic, handsome big brother you are talking about, I never get shot down." Dean said confidently, moving to cut his brother's next sentence of when he saw Sam open his mouth.

"Don't start making stuff up Sam, I know you, you are going to start listing off some imaginary women, and some imaginary scenarios, which never happened, just so you feel better. It's not my fault that I got all the good genes and you got left with the dodgy ones." Dean smirked as he watched the gloating smile leave Sam's face.

They sat in silence, looking out over the water, Dean trying to give Sam the chance to start, what was bound to be a chick flick moment of momentous proportion, until he couldn't stand the cold any longer.

"Anyway dude, what are you doing out here? Actually, the question I should be asking you is what the hell are you doing out here without your phone or at least a note letting me know that you weren't kidnapped or something?" Dean asked.

The look of realisation on his brother's face brought understanding for Dean. He had seen this look before and knew Sam hadn't gone out and just not bothered to leave a note for him, but instead he was so caught up in his own head that he never even thought about letting Dean know he was going out for some space.

"Oh man, I'm sorry Dean, I never thought. I assumed you'd be out for the night. I'm sorry; I know how much that annoys you. Sorry." Sam said looking a little sheepish. It was bad enough that Dean had found him here, but knowing that his brother must have spent some time looking for him, made him feel guiltier, God his brother shouldn't have to baby-sit him, he was twenty two for crying out loud.

"Just don't do it again, or if you do, could you at least bring your phone with ya geek boy." Dean said as he sat beside his brother, shoulders slightly touching. Sam nodded and turned back to look straight ahead and Dean realised that he was going to have to prompt Sam into telling him why he was sitting here in the middle of the night, with his ass beginning to grow slightly numb.

"So, care to share why we're sitting here at half one in the morning freezing our asses off?" Dean asked as he turned to Sam. Deep down inside he did not want to have this conversation with his brother, in fact he wasn't sure if he would be able to convince Sam that he wasn't worried, that it didn't bother him that he had visions, or could move things with the power of his mind. But if Sam was hurting and needed to get it out then it was his job to ensure that he was there for is little brother, even now when feared the outcome.

"The room was too stuffy, I needed to get out." Sam said simply, not looking at Dean. Mentally Dean groaned, it looked like his brother wasn't going to make this easy for him, and this was going to be one of those conversations where Dean was going to have to drag it out of him.

"Stuffy rooms, I hate that. Of course you could have just opened a door or window, or here's a mad idea, you could have sat on that bench, you know the one I'm talking about right. I mean it is hard to miss it seeing as how it is right outside our door?" Dean asked, raising his eyebrows as Sam turned to look at him.

"I fancied a walk; I needed to clear my head." Sam responded.

"Clear your head of what exactly? I know that there is a lot of stuff floating around in there at the moment." Dean smirked.

"Just Jess, Dad, the Millers, the fact that I'm a freak, you know the usual stuff." Sam replied. It actually felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders with that one sentence and he could breath a little easier, because that was it in a nutshell.

"Oh you mean that kind of stuff! You are not a freak Sam. So you have some ESP issues or whatever, look at Missouri, you wouldn't call her a freak, psycho maybe but not a freak." Dean said, staring at his brother as if daring him to challenge him on it. All his life Dean had fought to ensure that his baby brother wasn't labelled, whether it be the teachers at school or the kids in the playground, after all he was Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester's little brother or John Winchester's youngest son, not someone who should be categorised and put into a particular box. To hear Sam label himself made his stomach turn and there was no way he was going to let his brother slip into believing that.

"Dads going to freak, as if he wasn't disappointed enough before, this is going to be the icing on the cake. It wasn't bad enough that I gave up the hunt and left to go to college, now it looks like I'm turning into something he has spent the best part of his life hunting." Sam said, a sad smile appearing on his face as he looked at Dean.

"Sammy, we have been over this; Dad has never been disappointed in you, wanted to strangle you at times sure, but never disappointed. The visions Sam, good or bad, are not your fault, you have them and there is nothing we can do about it. It doesn't make you evil, you are still you Sam, and you are still trying to save people, that's who we are and that's what we do, that's what Dad does. I mean we just have to go with the flow here and do the best we can. We saved Jenny and her family, you saved me and it's all down to the visions. The important thing to remember here Sam is that, visions or no visions, we can't save everyone, it's crappy but that is just the nature of the job." Dean said fiercely, needing Sam to understand that it was ok.

He was surprised when Sam looked at him and smiled.

"Well when you put it like that Dean, I guess your right. Sure I don't want them, and they are as painful as hell but if they can do some good; let us help some people then maybe I should just be grateful." Sam replied. He watched as Dean's mouth opened and then closed again.

"What?" Sam asked, starting to laugh.

"You mean that's it? No drama, no tears, no needing a hug? You're happy to sit back and go with the flow?" Dean asked, not really believing what he was hearing.

"Well yeah, why sweat what you can't change?" Sam responded as he shrugged his shoulders. He was scared, and he knew Dean was freaked, no mater what he said, but he didn't need worrying about him having a meltdown on top of everything else.

"Christo," Dean said as he stared at Sam, who began laughing.

"God dude, have I been that hard to live with that you think I must be possessed when I don't go into meltdown?" Sam asked.

"You are not hard to live with Sam, you've had a hell of a couple of months and I realise that you lost more than just Jessica the night of the fire, don't think for a minute that I don't understand that. I'm proud of you Sam, I'm proud of the way you have kept your head up and kept going, despite of everything." Dean said sincerely.

"Ok dude, if you wanted a hug all you had to do was ask." Sam smirked, holding out his arms.

"Bite me." Dean replied as he moved up of the ground.

"Dean seriously though, thanks; I honestly don't know what I would have done without you the last few months. These visions would have probably pushed me over the edge by now if it wasn't for you." Sam said as he got up and joined his brother.

"Dude, how many times – no chick flick moments, jeez!" Dean said with a smirk as he watched Sam begin to laugh.

Moving towards Sam, with his hands in his pocket he shouldered his brother and looked him dead in the eye.

"Anytime Sam, anytime." Dean said honestly.

As they walked back to the motel in silence, Sam turned to his brother and he just couldn't help himself.

"So you were worried about me?" Sam said with a smirk.

Dean looked at his brother, trying to work out when exactly Sam had mastered his own game face because he definitely hadn't had it down before he ventured to Stanford. As much as he wanted to call his brother on it he knew that it would do more harm than good, by letting Sam think he had convinced Dean that he was ok with everything then Dean could in turn pretend that there was nothing to be ok with. But that didn't mean he was going to let his little brother away with goading him.

"Shut up. I'll tell you something though, you go off again like that without leaving a note, and I won't come looking for ya." Dean replied, trying to keep a serious face.

"Sure ya won't." Sam responded, sarcasm dripping from his words.

"I'm serious Sam, you wander off again, and you are on your own dude." Dean said looking straight ahead.

"I know that is not going to happen Dean, and you wanna know why?" Sam asked.

"Well I'm sure you're going to tell me one way or another Sam, so why not just spit it out."

"Dad would kill you." He said simply as he easily moved ahead of Dean, who had momentarily stopped, surprised at that statement, hearing Sam laugh as he walked. Dean, as ever, recovered quickly though.

"I'm not so sure about that dude, he'd probably be grateful that I saved him from the constant headaches that he gets when you're around, probably even help with his blood pressure." Dean replied, as he smirked at Sam who had turned around, looking offended.

"Whatever, jerk." Sam said.

"Great comeback, bitch!" Dean responded as he once again moved passed Sam and took his rightful position in front of his brother, a position he had no plans to ever retire from.

Please please review!! I need to know what you think so I can improve.