The Loss of Love

The Loss of Love

Disclaimer: The characters in this story are property of Renaissance Pictures. I am only borrowing them, with no profit being made off this story.

Feedback: Please. This is the first decent story I've posted online, and I want to know what you think. E-mail me at: DuskPriEvi@yahoo.com

Summary: Ares looks back at his one true love.

I will never forget this day. This one day will plague me all of my immortal life. Even as I remise now, I start to tear up, the biggest joke of all. But you will not see me laughing. After all, she was my true being, my soul, my love.

Many years ago, I first saw her. She fought with such skill; my breath was caught in my throat. Even after the little, informal training she had received, very few of the army she fought could oppose. Sure, they weren't that good, but this was her first battle. I knew there was something special about her, and was determined to find out what it was.

That battle was a wonderful sight, but her youngest brother died. She took that quite hard. It drove her to find such a dark blood lust that I haven't seen met since. She rampaged the entire known world, killing all who would oppose her. She was truly magnificent, but I just watched. I saw no reason to get involved; she was doing very well on her own.

Then, the day of Reckoning occurred. My love decided to take on Hercules, my pesky half brother I was overjoyed at this thought; I would finally be rid of him. I was forbidden to harm him, but she was free to do as she willed. She wasn't even one of my warlords! There was nothing Zeus could do about that. It promised to be a great sight.

She encountered him, and instead of killing him outright, she'd break him heart, then have his best friend kill him. It was a wonderful plan that should have worked. Alas, it didn't; instead, that encounter caused her to be driven from my fold.

I was not about to let this happen. I conjured up plan after plan to get her back, but it didn't work. Between her and that pesky bard of hers, they foiled every one of my plans. Still, I pressed, I wanted her back. In the beginning, I deluded myself that it was just because she was a prize I couldn't have, and I always did have a bit of an ego, but soon, I realized it was because I loved her. I wanted her near me always, but didn't know how to deal with her. In the end, I just keep blowing it.

Finally, I found the nerve to tell my one true love that I did love her. Straight out; no taunting, no threats. Just three simple words. But it was bad timing. I finally told her when all the gods wanted to kill her child, and she thought I was just covering for something else. Obviously, she didn't believe me. I hate myself for the way I treated her, but I couldn't change. I wasn't strong enough. Besides, she wouldn't believe it. She'd think it was just another scheme to get her back, or a plot to kill her child. Still, I laugh bitterly at that. I could never hurt that baby. She was so sweet and innocent.

Finally, it happened. The gods won out, killing my love's child, or so they thought. My poor dear couldn't handle it; she took her own life to end the grief. And there was nothing I could do. I let her live by her own terms; I had to let her die by them, too.

I decided that, even through I screwed up in life, I would do good in death. I put her and her best friend's body in ice caskets, so their bodies would remain forever perfect. Little did I know, I caused them to stay dead for 25 years, when they were supposed to awake in just a few hours. If my princess had bothered to tell me, I would have helped. I would have done everything in my power to. I didn't want the gods to chase her anymore that she did. But she didn't trust me. Not that I blame her. I wouldn't trust someone who did all that to me either. Believe me, I regret it. I would give up anything to change it. If only I could…

While she was dead, I was heart broken. I wouldn't do a thing for many, many years. I pleaded every god to bring her back, even if her child were to stay dead, but none of them would hear of it. And it was not with in my power to bring her back.

One day, I decided I would have to live my life, couldn't wallow in misery for an eternity, so I found a new fling. Immediately, I knew I had to have her. She reminded me so much of my princess. From her hair, to her smell, even to the way she fought. She became my new warrior, and lover. With her, I would destroy all of Eli's followers, cursing the man who caused my love to be taken from me. I would destroy everyone, through Livia. And she welcomed it.

Thus, my life went on. It wasn't good, it wasn't bad, it just was. I think I had almost gotten over her, when I heard it. The familiar whistle of the Chakram, the weapon, only she had been able to wield properly. Sure, some could throw it and catch it, but no one could manipulate it like her. It was like an extension of her will. I felt a warmth in my chest that I thought I would never feel again. My princess was back! Now I had to convince her that I loved her, and treat her right.

But, no. While my life was ruined while she was gone, I reverted back to my old self when she came back. I think she was beginning to see I love her, but she was too untrusting. And I had to screw things up again. "Give me a child, and I will protect yours from the other Olympians." She didn't take too kindly to that, even after I figured out who her daughter was. Of course, it was Livia. I had spent the last five years making out with the daughter of the women I love. She wasn't going to take that well, and she didn't. She hated me for it. I would have given the world to take it back, but what's done is done.

So, my princess found out she could kill gods as long as her child was alive, and, of course, took on Olympus. It all came done to a showdown in the main hall, with Xena's best friend, and daughter, barley alive, against Athena. The two died, and I couldn't let my princess join them, so I did they only thing I could-I gave up my immortality to save them.

But it was too late. I know Xena loved me back, but I had just done too much to her. She didn't' feel she could trust me. She and I, the newly mortal god of war, parted ways. But, as fate has it, we soon joined up again.

Our next encounters didn't go well. I got caught up in a plot of the furies. They would have me kill my love, by masquerading as her and her companions, and then rule Olympus. Foolish me, I didn't see any of it. I fell prey to her plot to destroy the furies, but I also managed to drown her. Even through she planned on it, it still hurt immensely. I killed my only true love. Of course, she wouldn't let a small thing, like drowning, keep her dead. Much worse had happened, but she always came back. She is a survivor and always will be. Not much can keep her down.

It broke my heart when she died. She and I parted ways, but met up again, when she turned me in to a farmed. That didn't last too long. After she left, my sister came to me, offering ambrosia. It would have been sooner, but she couldn't find any. So, once again, I was a god. And I watched her every day, keeping her from harm, but never appearing. I had caused her enough harm in her life; I owed it to her to allow her to finish it in peace.

But then it happened. I was off somewhere, I forget where, when I heard her scream, and felt a deep loss. I immediately appeared at her side, fearing for the worse. However, I was wrong. It was much worse that I could have ever imagined. She was badly injured, so badly there was nothing I could do to help her. She was going to die, because I had been gone. And giving up my immortality wasn't an option. Her body was too badly beaten; it would have been crueler to force her to live. I wasn't powerful enough to heal all her wounds, too. Before, I had been the great god of war, but now, I was the lowly god of Xena. She died. I sat there holding her corpse for days, weeks, I don't' know how long, but I would probably still be there it not for my sister. She convinced me to take care of her funeral. I did, but I don't remember it. I don't remember anything that happened for days, even weeks after that moment. All I know it that her corpse still rests in my castle. I don't visit often anymore, it became too painful. But I would visit tonight.

Today is the day that haunts my immortal life, and always will. Three thousand years ago, today, my love dies. She died because I was not there to protect her. It is my fault she is dead, and she died, never knowing I loved her. My love, I will always miss you, and love you dearly. I hope wherever you are now, you are in peace.

A lone tear rolls down the once impressive man's face, splattering on her glass coffin.