Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

Authors Note: So here is the thing. I am having a very hard time figuring out how I want to write this story. I've been thinking for a while Jessica. So it might be that it is all I've got. So I'm exploring here. I had a story up but nobody reviewed and I've been thinking it sucked. So I took it down to revise it a bit. Please, I beg you if you read through this than review. Tell me: did it suck, did you like it, and did you hate it. Just say something, anything. I apologize for spelling and grammar mistakes.

Salty Ocean Air

Chapter One

It had been six years since I set foot back in Forks, Washington. It had left a bitter taste in my mouth. So I did the only thing I could think of at the time. I packed a bag and left before anyone noticed. There was nothing there for me anymore. No romance, family, or friends. There was no happy ending for me.

No, Jessica Stanley didn't get happy endings. There was no light at the end of the tunnel; just a hell of a lot of darkness.

No I left for good and never returned. Had I thought about it? Yeah, but then the thought of returning to nothing filled my mind. No, I had no friends to call or visit and to be honest that burned and reopened the wound.

I had never had much of a life there anyway. I strived to be popular and beautiful, but it was never enough. I didn't get the guy or prom queen. Maybe it was superficial, but it had mattered to me at the time.

Those weren't the reasons I had left.

No, there were too many painful memories of him and family. They all left me in completely different ways. One did it voluntary and the other involuntary. It didn't make either one hurt any less.

Mike had completely made his choice. He wanted the one person that was never available to him and probably never would have been. I was foolish to think he could ever like me more than Bella. He loved her since he set eyes on her. I was foolish to think that my average looks could impress him compared to her fairy tale ones.

She had Skin white as snow, Hair a wavy deep brown with a reddish tint to it in the sun, Lips with a natural reddish tint, and deep chocolate brown eyes. She had a rather thin frame and wanted nothing to do with the social life of Forks High School. She was rather clumsy, so the damsel in distress act worked for her.

I was not the princess looking type, even though I wanted to be one. I had regular brown hair that was rather flat. All I knew was that I didn't have her natural beauty. It stung like a mother fucker.

Where Bella was delicate I wasn't so much. I had muscular body from the amount of running I did because volleyball practices and because of recreation. I also did a number of other sports. I didn't look delicate. I didn't have the appeal.

I had left home to a sullen hopeful little girl looking for anything to give me peace of mind. Now I come back a failure with a realistic approach to the world. I had thought I never belonged to Forks' especially after I had left. Now, I see I was never really up to take on the world by myself. No it just chewed me up and spit me out.

I had learned a few things though. I could walk away from any situation, maybe a little banged up but still walking. I had learned to survive.

And now I was going to the last place I had ever wanted to return.

XXXXXXXX

The air was unusually dry for a day in the Olympic Peninsula of northwest Washington State. Forks was a small town that no one could pin point under the near-constant overcast. It rained continuously on this town more than any other place in America. It was this town my mother escaped the ridiculously hot days of Dallas, Texas and came to the ridiculously cold days of Forks with me in tow.

I have a sneaky suspicion she had no concept of ordinary weather.

I was now driving towards this small town where I had felt I had never belonged, and after she showed up, loathed.

Since it was such a dry day I had the cover for my Jeep Wrangler down so the wind would be blowing in my hair. Soon there wouldn't be enough days like this. I should enjoy it while it last. So I turned up Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven.

I looked all around me as nothing but green whizzed by me. The scenery had always been beautiful. The trees were tall and even the brown trunks had been covered by moss and small bushes.

Eventually I had passed the town sign. The town hadn't changed much at all. The main street side walk had been fixed, with not so many cracks in it. The gas station was the first thing you passed with a fresh coat of paint on it bricks. Right across the street was the Liquor store, which would be getting a couple visits from me, and was appropriately next to it was the bank. The small public library was stationed right next to the elementary school. The lodge had looked a bit wearily than the last time she went there, but as busy as ever. The Thriftway was tucked into the corner where people were walking in and out. There were a number of other stores tucked in between the major ones. Of course Mike's parents store, although now I would imagine it was his, Olympic outfitters. And then there was the hospital. The only thing that was added was a small movie theater that was playing two movies that had already been in theaters for a while.

There was another gas station right before my turn.

I took a turn toward a dirt road. I followed the path and came towards several log cabins. This was where I would be staying for my stay until I found something more permanent. I parked my Jeep in front of the main cabin. I got out and walked straight in.

I pulled my sunglasses and looked around the medium sized building. To my right there was an arch that led to a small living room where kids were watching Disney. I was currently in the receptionist part. I looked down at the women. She had bright red hair, had a medium frame, and looking very professional. She was wearing a white button down blouse and black dress pants. She was currently looking at her computer through her black rimmed glasses. Behind her were two offices with men working in them.

I pulled my sunglasses of my head and placed them on my head.

"Hello, my name is Jessica Stanley. I called about renting a cabin." The women looked up with a huge smile on her face.

"Yeah, I know. I don't suppose you remember me. I was a freshman when you were a junior. Tammie is my name." I did slightly remember her. She had joined the cheerleader team and had a boyfriend of the junior varsity team.

"Yeah sorta. So, about the cabin." I placed both hands on the desk.

"Umm… Yeah here you go. You're all set. You already paid the down payment and everything. So, you're good to go. Number four. It's really pretty." I nodded my head and walked out.

When I parked in front of the place I would be staying at for who knows how long I dissected it. It was a small, one bedroom, and one story log cabin of light color wood.

It only took one trip to get everything I had collected over six years: Some clothes, a cell phone, my wallet, a laptop, and a bracelet that got passed down to me after the funeral.

I walked up the two steps to the front porch where there was a wooden rocking chair and wooden bench. When I walked in I was immediately greeted with a living room. I placed my bag on the brown leather couch. The living room was small: beside the couch, there were two wooden chairs, a small wooden coffee table, and a television. There were wooden floors throughout the place, but the living room had a green medium sized rug that was under the coffee table.

The kitchen was rather small too and was connected to the dining room. There was a slid door that led to the back porch, which had an amazing view of the wide river that led to the ocean.

The bedroom was small too but it had its own private bathroom that had a shower/bathtub. The bed frame was made out of wood too. Next to the bed were an end table and a lamp.

There was another bathroom that just consisted of a toilet and sink.

The place was simple beautiful and me.

I put myself stuff in the dresser and walked into the kitchen area. There were no dished, glassed, silverware, and most importantly no wine liquor.

I got in the jeep and turned on the radio. The Who's Behind Blue eyes started playing; the irony didn't humor me. I headed to the Thriftway.

The supermarket was busy with people getting the things they accidently forgot when preparing dinner. I went through aisle and aisle picking things here and there. I had decided on just a TV dinner tonight, but prepared for other meals. When I was picking a cereal I heard a voice behind me.

"Jessica", it was a soft whisper. When I turned around there was Angela Weber looking me up and down. She took a few unsure steps towards me until she wrapped her arms around me. Hugging her made me realized how much taller I was no than high school.

Angela stood at six feet and had light brown hair, a pale skin tone, and brown eyes (Hazel if you asked me). In high school she was a foot taller than me, but I had grown over the years and now stood at five feet ten inches.

She let go of me but held me at an arm's length away and looked me over again.

"God, you've changed so much."

"Yeah, you stayed the same though." I pulled out of her grip and threw the Special K cereal into my cart. I looked back over at her and saw she was still staring at me.

"You're different." Then she gave me a huge smile. "I'm so happy that you're here. When did you get in?"

"Today actually."

"Wow, well the old gang is getting together. Ben, Mike, Eric, Tyler, and Lauren are all coming over to mine and Ben's house to have a barbecue. Oh I got married to Ben. God we've gotta catch up. Here's my phone number." She took out a note pad from her pursue and wrote down her phone number and handed it to me. "Call me anytime." I waved and nodded to her as she went on her way.

I finished my shopping and went up to pay. The cashier was a teenage boy with blonde hair and baby blue eyes.

"Hello ma'am. How are you doing today?" I smiled at him.

"Good and you?" He nodded at me and finished checking me out. I grabbed my bags and put them in the jeep.

As I drove back to the cabin I saw my old house. The pretty two story brick building with blue shutters and porch. It looked like a happy family moved in because there was a silver mini van parked out front.

When I got to the cabin, I unloaded all the groceries, putting them in a place I could easily find them when it was time to use them. I placed the TV dinner in the microwave and went to set up my computer on the dining room table. I opened my email and saw that it was all just spam.

When my dinner was done I scarfed it and turned on the television. I just stared at it and then looked up at the time. It was till a pretty decent day, no rain as of yet and it was only six o'clock. I got up and jumped into my jeep and took a ride. I had no clue where I was going but I was there before I knew it.

First Beach. It was pretty enough with it rocky sands and drift wood towards the edge of the ocean. To me an Ocean was an Ocean, I loved them all. And this one brought me just as much pleasure as any of the others I had been too. It had the lovely smell of salty ocean air I was often told I smelt like. As far as I knew the ocean was the only home I truly knew.

I ripped my shoes of and ran towards the edge of the ocean. It didn't matter if it was seventy degrees today, by the ocean if felt ten degrees cooler and the ocean was even colder. I hissed as my feet stepped into the ocean.

My outfit of choice didn't suit well for this ocean air. I was currently in shorts and a thin white t-shirt.

"Hey isn't that outfit a little inappropriate for the weather, miss." Shivers went down my spine and I become paralyzed from the shock of the voice. It couldn't be. I was in town for a couple of hours…I looked up and there he was.

He broke my heart multiple times throughout high school and for the final time after the wedding.

"Hey Mike." I said monotone. I stood up straight and watched him waiting for the recognition in his pale blue eyes.

As he looked me over I silently wondered if I had completely healed. The teenage girl part of me wanted him to approve my new look. I wanted him to wrap his arms around me and have a reunion. The realistic part of me just waited.

He had stayed the same but there were slight differences. No longer did he carry his baby face, instead his face had the sharp angles of a man. He had cut his blonde hair and stood at five eleven, an inch above me. He was no longer the boy I fell in love with, but now a full grown man.

"Jess…Jess is that you?" He took a shaky step toward me. I took a deep breath as he came closer.

"Yeah it's me." I turned back towards the ocean.

"Jess… Where… You never… How long are you back for?" I turned back around.

"Yeah I'm back. For how long? I have no clue." I saw his eyes light up at the prospect of me staying.

He continued to look at me.

"You've changed." I just continued to stare at him. I held are staring, I wasn't going to give way to him like I use to. He finally blinked and shied away.

"Wow…I can't believe it's really you. I thought you left for the big city and were never coming back. Look at you even tattoos." I had a sleeve done over the time I was gone.

As I stood staring at him I remembered how long it took for me to get over him. I spent two years just sticking my head in books and studying. When I wasn't studying I would lie awake listening to music, wondering when it wouldn't hurt anymore; when the world would turn right side up again.

When I did get over it I finally realized how much I was missing. It was a glorious two years until life was turned upside down again.

"God wait till everyone…We are all having a barbeque here tonight. Wow…"

"Yeah I saw Angie. She told me. You guys still hang out."

"Yeah, I married Lauren." I bit back a wince, "and well some of us have kids now."

"That's great. No Bella?" I looked up at him. He slightly winced at her name. There was still that look of want and lust for the girl he fell in love with. I had lost to a girl that never would have been his anyway. How pathetic was that for both of us.

"No, she hasn't even kept in contact with us, Left with the Cullens and never came back. Chief tells everyone she's good." I noticed the jealousy in his voice at the mention of her keeping contact with her father.

"Well he's her father. Good for you about marrying Lauren."

"Yeah," his eyes brightened at the mention of Lauren. "It's been great. I love her so much; we are having a kid since the store is doing amazing."

I hadn't realized that there was still a knife plunged into my gut. It twisted at the mention of them having a kid. I loved Mike so much and it seems I was never good enough for him. He went after the women in my life that was held on a pedestal by everyone: Lauren and Bella.

Lauren had been one hell of a mean girl in high school. I had been one of her lackeys that followed her around and wished her popularity and prettiness would rub off of me. Of course being her friend meant enduring the constant insults she would throw at me. I remember her beautiful platinum blonder hair and green eyes. She didn't look like every other girl in school. She had the same soft slender body that Bella had.

"Lauren will probably be excited to have you here. She misses her shopping buddy. Always telling me how she wished you were around. She'll probably ask you to be the god mother of her child. So will you?"

He had said I changed but I don't think it has processed in his brain. The girl he knew would have jumped at any chance to be in his life, but I wasn't that girl.

I turned toward him and narrowed my eyes at him.

"I'm not the same anymore." I said clearly, "I'm not the girl who would jump when you and Lauren said too. I don't know how long I'm back for. Maybe long enough to be here for your child's christening, but I sure as hell won't be its godmother." He hung his head in shame.

"Well then will you at least come?"

"Yeah maybe."

"You've changed so much. You are taller, stronger, and hell you look dangerous. I wasn't sure it was you at first."

"You and Angie sure haven't."

"Well we are happy. She married Ben you know. They have two kids and another one on the way. She's only two months." He looked me over again, "Where have you been all this time? Why are you back now? Not that I'm not happy you're here, but what took you so long?" He had a huge smile on his face.

"Needed a change of scenery." I shrugged my shoulders. Mike never got that people needed space and time, so I told him bull shit. He'd never know the difference. "How's the store?"

He's eyes brightened at this question.

"Well I went to school for business and my folks had me work there for a while. When they retired I inherited. We opened up a couple of other's. Some big names in gear have been brought in and now it's a chain. Making lots of money." He puffed out his chest.

"Bet Lauren likes that." She had always wanted to end up with a wealthy man.

"Yeah considers herself my trophy wife. So where are you staying at?"

"At the log cabins. Rented one."

"Wow those are sure nice. Lauren and I are living in Mr. and Mrs. Andersons old house. You remember the bright yellow one with the green shutters." Of course I remembered I had wanted that house for us, where we would have pale blue eyed kids running around in the back yard. Now that was their dream; I felt the knife twist again.

"You coming to the barbeque, it begins at eight."

"I'll see. Just wanted to get to the ocean air."

"Well hopefully I'll see you around." I nodded my head and walked back to the jeep. Before I go in I heard a bunch of booming laughter.

When I looked over to the spot I heard the sound I saw a bunch of La Push residents running around and having fun. The men were all over six feet tall and were in general huge. I ran my hands through my hair and jumped into my jeep.

It had gotten dark while I was talking to Mike. When I headed in I placed a phone call to my former office.

"Hello Jessica. I was wondering when you would call."

"Hey Captain I was just wondering if you got the transfer to go through?" I heard his husky laughter on the other end.

"I think this is a huge mistake Stanley. A small town police department. Come back to Miami, I know what happened affected you, but we love you. People make mistakes."

"Sorry Captain. I'm good here." I stepped on the back porch and watched the children from the other cabins playing in the water.

"Alright then. The Chief said you were a friend of his daughters in high school. Told him great things about you and he could use the extra help. You start next week. He said he needs his assistant to file your paper work and order your stuff." I sighed and ran my hands through my hair.

"Thanks Captain."

"Hey, Call once in a while." His voice got very serious. His daughter died in a tragic car accident a couple years back, the minute I walked into his police academy he took to me. We formed a father-daughter bond, and because of that bond we had to get different partners; we argued too much.

After the call I sat on the chair that was on the back porch when a little girl came over to my cabin.

"Hello ma'am. Momma said to invite you over." She was a pretty little thing. She was African American and was wearing a purple dress with crocks on. Her hair was in braids and she had a smore in her hand.

"Yeah sure." He smile got even bigger and then she jumped off my porch and waved for me to follow her. I walked to the back of her cabin and noticed she had a two story one.

"These are my parents' ma'am." And then she ran over to where her brother who was knee deep in the river.

"Hello" I smiled at the couple. There were sitting in folded clue chairs. The women had light brown skin and dark brown hair that was pulled into a pony tail. She had Sharpe features and a runner's body and looked to be in her late twenties.

"Saw you moving in today. Thought you could use some company. Grab a beer." She smiled at me and pointed to the cooler.

"Gladly." I smiled back when she laughed at me.

"A women after my own heart." The husband laughed. He had the same features as his wife but taller and darker.

"Sorry to be rude but my names tie and this here is Brandon."

"Yeah we moved here six months ago. We don't know that many people." Brandon told me.

"Well I use to live here. Decided to move back after some complications in Miami."

"Oh yeah, so what do you do." Tie asked me and Brandon looked over at me curiously.

"Well I am a cop. I'll be working as a cop next week, but right now I'm not doing anything."

"A cop hey. I'm a doctor. I'm working at the hospital in forks." Brandon said to me.

"And I'm JUST a nurse." Tie told me, but was looking pointedly at her husband. It made me laugh, must be an argument they've had many times.

"I never said you were just a nurse honey. You're not just a nurse. You're a nurse and you do a lot more than I do." I laughed at him sucking up to his wife.

"Yeah, yeah." She shook her head.

"She's not just a nurse." He looked at me and said. "So what made you want to be a cop?"

"I don't know. I took a criminal justice intro class in college and fell in love with the subject. What made you guys go into the medical field?"

"Well I wanted to be a nurse like my grandmother was. Actually went into the army as a nurse."

"Wow." My eyes widened. My respect for her grew. Being a nurse was tough, but being a nurse in the army.

"I was inspired by my high school teacher to make something of myself. So I become a doctor."

"So any family here or anything?" I shook my head.

"Nah all died six years back." Their heads nodded.

"Yeah we couldn't exactly deal with the city life anymore." Tie told me.

"Yeah no place to raise kids." Brandon agreed.

I sat by the fire as Brandon and Tie went back and forth about certain subjects. They were fun and nice people to be around. I hadn't had that in a while.

Around eleven o'clock I headed toward my jeep and put the hood back on. I took a shower and then got ready for bed. After putting on my shorts and tank top, I put my hair in a bun and walked around with a tooth brush in my mouth. When I heard a knock at the door I jumped in surprise.

When I opened it there was a rather pretty Native American women standing at the door. She had her dark brown wavy hair down to her shoulder. Her smile was breath taking and she was currently holding a loaf of bread.

"Hello, my names Kim and I live right next door with my husband Jared." She handed me the bread, "I know it's late but I'm a nurse at the hospital with Tie. I just really wanted to meet you." I let her in.

"Wow yours is small but cute. Jared and I move after I graduated. It's close enough to the reservation, but close enough to the hospital."

"Well…have a seat. I'll cut the bread and get us some milk." I liked her already; she had a bubbly personality and was rather nice. It didn't bother me that she came late because I was a night owl anyway. Also, sleep hadn't come easy to me, nightmares loved to haunt my dreams.

I handed her a glass of milk and a piece of bread.

"Again sorry I came over so late, just I was so excited to meet you." I waved her off.

"Your fine," I took a bite of the piece I cut. It was banana nut bread; it was my favorite. "I like you already. You just made me banana nut bread." I smiled at her as I licked my fingers.

"So, it's good?"

"Way good."

"I'm happy about that. I was worried I wasn't a good cook. My husband has to like my cooking." She slightly laughed at me. I could tell it was slightly something more to the comment, but I ignored it.

"So how old are you?" I asked her.

"I'm twenty two."

"Twenty-four."

"What do you do?" For what every reason I could tell she was slightly lonely. Like she could use a friend and to be honest I could use a friend myself.

"I'm a cop."

"I'll be working at the Forks Police department." She smiled.

"You'll be the only girl officer, but my friend Paul and Layla work there. Layla is the receptionist there."

"Wow that's awesome. I was a little nervous about the other officers, but I was friends with the chief's daughter in high school." He smile dropped slightly and turned nervous.

"Bella Cullen?" She asked me.

"Does he have another daughter?" I asked with a sarcasm dripping from my voice, but with a playful edge.

"Ummm… No but she used to be friends with my friend." She all of a sudden became very interested in her food.

"Well we weren't that close in high school, so I wouldn't call her my friend. But hey, you should come over whenever you want. I could use a friend." I tried to be reassuring. Her smile got big again.

"Yeah that would be great. I could use one too." She got up and slapped her thighs. "Well I should get home. Jared should be there."

We exchanged phone numbers and I led her to the door and told her good night. I cleaned up the dishes and headed to bed.

As soon as I tucked into bed the rain hit the windows with a vengeance.

Welcome to Forks.