Big Smiles and Sinister Eyes
Disclaimer: None of the characters used from this story is mine. And also, I do not own Gakuen Alice.
Summary: Her smile. Her intimidating big smiles. And my eyes. Cold. Sinister eyes. But still, in the end, we were still romantic—hopelessly romantic. Hah. I childish love, it is.
I found it unusual that it is more socially acceptable to complain about what you have than it is to ask for what you want— Phil Lout
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try one I've never tried before.—Mae West
Chapter 1: When You Go In Between Papers And Pens
Sleeping alone—rather isolated—an aloof, irritable and temperamental messy, raven-headed lad laid idly underneath a huge Sakura tree's dappled, cool shade with a manga on his face that would perhaps—give you an intuition and quite assuming that he's currently sleeping just now. He had been like this—quiescent—for almost a couple of hours at present. Neither one of his thoughts floated like free sailing birds in his head. But one indignant contemplation outwitted the best of his, to stay away from crowd noises.
"Damn that stupid class." He slothfully cursed under his breath as he practically drew out a disgruntled groan of exhaustion mixed with fury. At this very moment, he was hoping—still hoping—that possibly, he could escape the gaytard's class, as well as escape Alice Academy and he did but except for the second wish. It was way too far from what he could possibly dream. Perhaps, it was a nightmare he has to bare. Drastic, I know.
He grunted once more before shifting by sides.
If you have been confused and may as well, asking me why he was here—too easy—it was because of a one good reason. He had just keenly skipped Homeroom and English class. Hah. Bet it was no sweat for geniuses like him to catch up class lessons.
He clicked his tongue in annoyance as revulsion came over him every time he thinks of it. His teacher. 2-B's class adviser. Yes. He is talking about Narumi Anjou.
Well, he's quite accustomed to this—or maybe that—cutting classes during his time—on a daily basis—and it was certainly or somewhat fairly convincing on his part though. He was the student. One of his students. One of Anjou's little babies. Yuck.
But for him, it was better this way. Alone. It was literally his frequent toil.
How he despised Narumi so much that he nearly burned all of his silk like honey-blonde tresses to nothing but almost completely well-polished, shiny bald head though lucky he is that day since he didn't. Half-way on burning his damn ugly hair, he must have been fortunate that someone came to his rescue. That stupid teacher must thank Natsume's—oh so—dearest seatmate and class partner, Mikan Sakura. Yes. The said class heroine. Well, Natsume couldn't say a thing how she is to be described—pretty indescribable—as he scarcely categorize her as one of the dumbest person he'd ever met. She was hyper. Stupid. And annoying. Nothing more, nothing less. But in my case, as much I have to explain, Mikan's fond of sweets, friends, and Natsume—ah, wait—Hotaru too. She had this customary habit: lugging the fire caster with her all around the campus and if not, she cling's to his side like a leech—a leech—but by which, Natsume—being stoic and hideous—kind of enjoyed her company—even the slightest. It was quite entertaining—tailing her wherever she goes. It wasn't that bad at all. Well, not unless you annoy him but anyways, that's another story to put up. He likes being with her—in someway. Meaningless to say, their clinginess to each other doesn't mean a thing. Doesn't mean anything like he's some kind of a freaking stalker. No. That would totally be not the real Natsume, Not Natsume-ish, if you ask me. But still, damn them for being so close. So close to each other although in a way that they share a different relationship than normal peers—friendship—in which some people call. A Silent Friendship and please do disregard Mikan's loudness. Heck it was nothing mutual in between them but because of annoyance towards each other. They do quarrel a lot.
All at once, the school bell rang, cuing that the last period for morning classes ended its reign and needless to say that it was already lunch break. But oh well, Natsume didn't bother waking up and buy his own time to purchase food since he knew it very well that she will be coming with something in her hands. He was positive that she would bring one for him.
Care to know who?
"Hey, Natsume!" Shouting like a madman, Mikan pushed herself down on her knees to sit right next to his partner. "WAKE UP!" When she spoke—scream—, irritation was evident.
"Tch." Natsume simply shrugged his shoulders and removed the manga off his face right on the next second, "You know that I am not in the mood to talk with you, little girl. Better if you go away and hang-out with somebody else with the same stupid I.Q of yours. Damn it." He said, quite infuriated as he shifted to turn his back on her. It was good enough to irritate the other party as well.
"Natsume!" Mikan yelled for the second time, her voice laced with frustration and was relatively in an offensive tone. She huddled herself closer to the sleeping figure in front with a wan look that displayed disappointment on her face. "Why don't you move your lazy butt and work with me!" She deafeningly and gallingly wailed, shaking Natsume's innocent and blameless arm with force—still on tenterhooks for his partner to pay attention and liven up at once which is really hopeless for the moment. "Don't you dare sleep on me again! I told you once before, right? No one—and when I said no one it is accurate—nobody would ever want somebody—or even anybody—to just sleep on them while they're talking!" She unrelentingly ranted, purposely emphasizing some words for him to notice as she resumed talking. "You are so stupid. Surely, you'll regret it if you don't listen to me!"
"Tch."
Mikan irked as her hands twitched reluctantly against his touch and so, as quick as she could hereby do, she pulled her hand to her side as it constantly and never-endingly twitched. Her eyebrows arched down and a natural scowl showed itself on her face. "And plus, do not just answer me with that 'tch' of yours! It's annoying if you ask me!"
"Like I care about you." He appallingly submitted, sniffing as he heard her speak deafeningly. "State what you want." He sharply demanded, still unmoving on his area.
"You know that we have lots of homework to do, don't you, Mr. Smartass?" Mikan stated, quite sarcastic as she reminded him that stuff. School works.
Hah. Since when had she been calling him 'Smartass'? Just now? Oh great. Nice name.
"Who cares about homework anyways." Natsume lazily stated, sluggishly pulling himself up to sit on his buttocks with his back rested on the huge, tree's trunk. "If you'll tell me that you care about your grades. Tch. Forget it. You'll always top in the lowest." He coldly stated with venom leaked on his voice. He glared at Mikan who had just given him that look. That Innocent and stupid look she always have inside her pocket. Typical Mikan.
Up roaring big mouth? Ugly face? Childish underwear preferences? Immature brat? Dang. Not bad. It was all worth it. That's Mikan for you!
"Well, perhaps, that is not the case here—"She started, tightly crossing her arms over her chest with a bitter pout on her face. "I am really sorry for not being such a smart-assed genius like you, stupid." She said, trying to look funny as she stuck her tongue out like a child.
"Yeah," Natsume started, derisively rolling his eyes in her way, "Whatever." But in any case, he indolently dragged his cold, smoldering crimson eyes to Mikan, then to the backpack sitting idly beside her thigh. Sensing that it was a book that caught his eye on the small access of her bag, he leered. "You're bringing a book?" He scoffed, conceitedly lifting an eyebrow of amusement. "Don't tell me that you want me to teach you how to read fairytales? Pathetic."
At this moment, it was not food that Mikan brought with her, it was her bag.
Born with embarrassment, Mikan's big, hazel eyes widened as a light flush surfaced her cheeks. She scrunched her eyes close and shrieked with her hands flattering on her side, slashing the air like pointy swords. "You are not funny, stupid! Stop ridiculing me if you don't want to die at an early age!"
To hell and back, you wouldn't assume that despite her small height, she has that rare characteristic—louder than chickens.
Out of hilarity, Natsume cracked an infamous wry smirk of his and turned to snigger haughtily only for the brunette who flustered with shame and mortification in front of him. It was cute and was quite enough for him to enjoy some time. To kill boredom, of course.
"You are not making any sense at all, Natsume! I totally hate you to the extreme and not to point out, you are so annoying!" Mikan fumingly sustained, shaking her head to clear off the wave of embarrassment inside of her as her hands found its way to curl into balls.
"And so are you too."
"Curse you! Shut up or—" Without any second thought, Natsume brought a hand in front and without any delays, directed it shoulder-level to Mikan. A small firelight produced.
"You shut up or I'll burn that ugly hair of yours." He dangerously warned, mildly glaring at her as he neared his hand closer to the young brunette. "I'm certainly sure that you don't want that to happen, do you?" And yes. Threatening her is necessarily needed. He was even grateful for the fact that she can't be perturb against him when it comes to alices—using alices.
He pompously scoffed at seeing Mikan's reaction—which was incontrovertibly an exaggerated one as she gasped in horror. She even jumped on her spot when he neared his hand to her. Such a priceless expression.
"Stupid little girl."
With that, Mikan's left brow involuntarily twitched as her lips trembled with chaste hint of annoyance as she narrowed her eyes into a glare but when those crimson eyes flashed, she intentionally chose to obey him and act upon his partialities rather than to get her hair ironed with fire. It waould be drastic. She forced a smile to come out and nodded her head in sheer understanding. Natsume could only probe a smirk on his way as withdrew his hand out and raised a brow that gestured for her to continue. Without words slipping out of Mikan's tongue, she pulled the zipper to the bag open before reaching out a pad of paper and a pen out from it.
"What's that for?" Natsume asked with nonchalance. His voice were still flat even if it was stated as a question. So in return, it sounded to be a demand.
Mikan blinked her eyes twice before answering him back with a cheery tone, "Mr. Narumi said that we need to create our own story by partners. Only meaning that we are to share one work." Before Natsume could even give any of his protests, Mikan continued; accusingly pointing a hand on his face. "And you are my partner. I won't allow such lame excuses, Natsume. So don't assume." She said as she closed her eyes with a latter second of gaining a strict poise as she placed her hands on her waist.
Natsume didn't gave any word—only a remorseful roll of his eyes and his done. He knew that his complains would no longer take effect on her. Like his suggestions were validated on her undiluted mind and plus, she was too loud to compete with him. To be compared by him. So in the end, he was the total loser.
Mikan placed the paper on her lap and beamed Natsume's way with acridity, "It's either we get zero or—" Natsume cut her off with short but blunt remark.
"Go on."
"Go on what, Natsume?" Mikan inquired, raising an eyebrow of bewilderment. She was always like that. Weird and strange. She'll keep bugging you to death about that thing and soon after, she forgets.
"Out from your stupendous idiocacy. Go on with that stupid work." He said, glaring as he pursed his lips into a thin line.
Mikan mouthed an 'oh' before bobbing her head in understanding, "That would be good but…what do we do first? Is it conclusion or the body? What? I forgot. Wait. God! I forgot!" With that, she started to freak out, making Natsume's ears to bleed—well, almost likely.
"Shut up, stupid."
"Why should I? I just forgot about what to do first! Gosh. We would get zero if—"
"Introduction." Natsume plainly said, no emotions coated his voice.
"Huh? Introduction? What is that word?" Mikan asked with ignorance on her voice. It was good enough to make his partner annoyed.
"Damn it." He unerringly cursed. His voice was sufficiently thunderous for the brunetteto pick up.
"Damn it what?" As realization hit her, it wasn't a word—a normal one. It was a foul word. Natsume's badmouthing her. She sourly glowered and hissed, "You are totally making fun of me."
"Am not."
"You are."
"I said I did not." Natsume defended himself from the blame with an unfortified stare crossed on his face.
"But you just did!" Mikan protested, trying to indicate that he was the one who said it mistakenly.
"You are so annoying Polkadots." That was the last words Natsume said as he gave her a dismissive look.
"Back to you!" Mikan shouted irritably before planiting a light knock—or rather a nudge—in his ribs. Lucky she is for having him act gentlemanly that he preferred to be hit by her hand than to take a revenge. It would look relatively pathetic if he hurt her. She's a girl. Remember that. Mikan is a girl.
"Work." Natsume demandingly ordered, holding an authoritive tone on his voice.
"B-But—" Mikan tried to resist but his words get in first.
"I said, work."
Mikan sullenly bit her lower lip and painstakingly stared at the fallowed paper. A deafening silence invaded them and it was Mikan who broke the stillness. Mustering all her courage, she darted her questionable gaze to the only person sitting across her. "Can we just adopt stories?"
"Dunno." Natsume unperturbedly replied, shrugging his shoulders.
"Come on, Natsume!" Mikan screamed at him with frustration stung on her voice. "I need your cooperation so speak up!" She ominously proposed, a tinge of dissatisfaction and desperation stayed on her voice.
"Hn."
"Slice of life or fantasy? Ah. Fantasy would be good, yes?"
"You choose."
"But Natsume!"
"Hn. I'm listening."
Damn. He's no good.
"What on earth does that 'hn' of yours really mean?" Mikan wildly screamed, making a short break of circuit in her mind; absolutely contaminating the entire system of hers to be damaged. The fuse had just exploded.
Natsume could only raise an eyebrow of curiosity as he spotted her yelling the second late before collecting herself composure as she—by now—clicked the tip of her pen and subsequently licked her dried lips. She was being naughty and wise? Was she thinking?
She quickly averted her sparkling hazel eyes to the fire caster and assured him something that Natsume knew she wouldn't perfectly keep till the end.
"Worry nothing about, Natsume. I wouldn't be giving you any tasks so the whole work leaves in my behalf." She said, winking at his direction. "For short, I will be the one to write it myself. I know I can do this. " She expectantly encouraged herself as a small fire lit u on her eyes. Determination. That is Mikan's specialty.
"Hn."
Mikan gathered all her things on her arms before standing up on her feet and transferred a seat next to the raven-headed lad. She squirmed closer to him, only making Natsume to widen his eyes in utter disbelief. Surprisingly, Natsume—for once-blinked his eyes in shock as Mikan's arm—unintentionally—get in contact with a pinch of his sun-tanned skin but yet—however—he managed to cope up to control his emotion. With a blink of an eye, his eyes turned normal—cold—as he assembled the missing pieces of his—now—incoherent outlook in life.
"Ne, Natsume—" Mkan started, waving a hand in front of the fire caster with great concern etched all over her face, "—are you listening?"
Natsume simply raised an eyebrow at Mikan, "What?"
Mikan drew out a long, heavy, lagged sigh before repeating herself the statement that rung on her ears a minute ago, "I can't think of a better beginning. Uhmm. Maybe you can suggest…something."
Natsume blinked his eyes once before shrugging his shoulders in response. "I'll think.."
NATSUME HYUUGA POV
Seeing her working hard on that damn thing reminds me somehow of myself. In my past life. What I mean is that, hardworking? Determined? Hell yeah. You might be talking to the old Hyuuga. It way back in the oldest times of my life—a nightmare that I would be remembering for the rest of my life. A reminiscent of me. The scar of truth and reality.
That was the real beginning of my life. What I was made of. Why I was here. This so called inhuman power proves everything. I hate it. I always do. Ugh. Curse that god who made alices.
I was still five then, when I—accidentally—burn down the house Mom and I were living in with flames. I wasn't impressed at how it collapsed to the ground awfully with nothing left but ashes and brown crisps but I couldn't help it but stand there like an idiot. Too stupid.
The pain.
The sorrow.
The grief.
I have them all inside of me. It was my fault. I was the one to blame. I am what they call demon's prawn. Fire isn't for good, right? It goes to the other side. To hell. And that was where I am right now.
Those anguished thoughts were always with me, not until the endearing yet intimidating little girl came to walk into my life and ruin all my plans of obliteration. All I want in life was power.
Power and authority—but that was all I dreamt of before I met her. Now, it was all different. Like I never cared for what life may lead me to. As long as she's with me. That I'm beside her. Protecting her. Life is fair. That was when I met Mikan Sakura and know what she is in my life. She was my happiness. My smile. My life.
But then again, I can't really trust her. I can only trust with myself. She couldn't help me, or so I thought? Crap. What I wanted to say is that I still hate her despite all the trials we have gone into—together.
Her smile.
Her laugh.
Her words.
They were all clustered with meandering sheer of contentment and bliss. Happiness, that is. And they were all full of insincerities—just like a lie. They were only made to cover the true meaning of life. Suffering.
Why does she interact with me? Just like now? Why does she always have that sugar coated smile on her face even though I've hurt her a thousand times. All through this passing years, I am nothing but an antagonist in her life.
No.
Never.
Stop.
Shut up.
Damn it. Go away.
Stupid.
You'll never succeed on that. You'll fail.
Give up.
Those words. My words. They were the things that I usually say to her. Everytime. But what does she do? Make up with it. Right.
She sticks with me almost all the time. But what did I do? Reject her.
She smiled for me because she forced to, isn't it? Partially considered as true, I guess. Maybe yes—that might be an appropriate answer. She was just taken by force to interact with simply because I'm her partner and that she knows what I'm undergoing to. My life is as stake. Thanks to my alice though. Damn. Everything's just too stupid too imagine.
I hate my life.
I blankly stared at her for a good fifteen minutes before she broke into a hard, quite annoyed shrill.
"My head's gonna blow any minute!" That was what I'm talking about. She dumb. Pathetic. Stupid. But still, she's the Mikan I've known to love—Love annoying an idiot.
She wiped off big pearls of sweats trickled on her forehead with the back of her hand, her eyes fixed on the still empty and cleared paper. She's definitely taking that damn homework way too serious.
"Suffering from too much heat?—Heatwave." I monotonously inquired, smirking, "Want me to pour down a pail of cold water right on your head, little girl?"
Irritated, she glared down at me with those flashing hazel eyes while tearing off papers in her hands."Ha-ha. You are so funny, Natsume. Too lame."
"Hn." I flatly commented, looking at her as she heaved out a restrained, dejected sigh. "Get off with that. I'm sure you wouldn't be able to finish that on time so, better if you just bring that thing to an end."
She pulled a livid look and hissed at me, "You just don't know any of this, Natsume. Shut up."
But her threats were all failed attempts. It didn't even perturb me in the least. Why should I? Tch. Screw that thought.
She crossly crumpled some pieces of scratch papers and threw it with out a care—to anywhere. Certain was this girl of not minding where those trashes land next. Amusing.
She furiously scraped her head with her hands, making her hair messy—chaotic as it is. Messier than mine. Hers is chaotic.Poor pigtails.
"I can't concentrate!" She yelled.
"Hn." Hell yeah, it's pretty obvious. She's not thinking. Hah. Why would this girl think? Ever think? She has that brain of hers working for a damn hour then it shuts down. Chicken brain.
When she started ranting. Again. Heck it was the time I kept my mouth deadly shut as I picked up the manga—my manga—which was helplessly lying on the pampas right next to the vacant spot beside me and brought it up, face level to resume reading from where I left it. Simple.
"Ne, Natsume."
Terror. She is nothing but a walking disaster. Ugh. I know that she knows what I'm doing. Damn it, stupid people living on Earth.
I see no reasons to entertain her.
Stupid problems.
Stupid partner.
Ignore. That is the word. The perfect word for her to get.
"Natsume."
Still, I didn't bother answering her.
"Natsume! Natsume! Natsume! HEAR ME."
I hissed and cursed under my breath. "Now WHAT?" My voice sounded irritated as I vented my rage to the trap in front of me. I need to focus—on what I'm reading. Be calm.
"You make the introduction." She smilingly commanded, poking my left arm. Damn her.
Just who the hell does she think of herself? My mother? Shit.
I clicked my tongue and lowered the manga which I was still holding right now, "You said it yourself. I'm not doing any work."
"B-But, I can't think of a better foreword!" She wailed, holing my arm.
I hate that sound. I hate everything about her voice. This noisy girl.
"Do not touch me." I warned as I glared at her direction.
"Not unless you help me!" She said, challenging me. I don't care.
"It's NOT my fault, stupid." I retorted, dragging the word 'not' as I resumed reading.
"Please! Please! PLEASE!" She begged, releasing my arm from her gripping as she clasped them together and rub her palms against each other. "Just the beginning and I promise that you're perfectly done with your part!" She sweared, giving me look of reassurance. Pathetic.
"No." I bluntly replied.
"Please?"
"I already said no and it's final." I facetiously stated, declaring an end to our conversation as I snap the book close and shove it to my pants' pocket.
"Screw you, Hyuuga Natsume!" was her immediate response as she fumingly forced a defiant look to face me. "Sometimes, I do prefer Ruka over you or Hotaru. And right now, I'm regretting things—for having a stupid and perverted class partner like you!"
She abruptly stood up, turned around and stomped her feet in aggravation. She looked at me once more—almost likely—before she decided to leave in instance. I can see revulsion and hatred over powering her as a dark scowl was etched on her face.
She was about to walk away when I—unwilling and by force—snatched the paper on the ground since it subconsciously fell down on her lap a minute ago. I rashly raised a hand as a sign of defeat in front before unleashing a disgruntled groan that escaped the back of my throat. "…You win."
I took notice of the rapid halt on her footings as I impulsively threw a hand in front, "…the pen."
Perceptibly, it's clear that I'm forced to write.
She turned on the heels of her feet and fully faced me wide-eyed. She unknowingly blinked her eyes and gave me a confused gape, "Sorry?"
She is pissing me off. This girl is really dead after this.
I frigidly rolled my eyes at hearing her oblivions and forgetfulness. She is so damn clueless. "PEN."
She is so slow. I thought she wanted me to write? A total idiot.
She mouthed an' oh' before nodding, a small smile crept on her lips as she handed me the pen, "Here."
Goddamn shit. She's a demon.
She subsequently sat back beside me and craned her head to probably see what I've been up to—scribbling on the plain sheet of shit. Darn it.
No progress? Hah. Think again, kid.
"Be careful with grammars, Natsume. I don't want -80 for my grades."
Damn it.
"Tch. You should be accustomed to that, Idiot. You always get 70 down grades. You even top the lowest. Rank 1000."
"Ha! Do NOT add zeros, Natsume! I only ranked 100!"
So here she goes. Rant. AGAIN.
Ignore.
Scratch that thought. It's silly. I tell you.
Being so close to her sickened me.
The warmth.
I could feel it. Totally feel it.
I could absolutely feel her warm breath feathered on my neck as she moved closer to me. And her scent.
Her scent.
It was disgusting. Strawberries with a hint of tangerines. Ugly. Tch. Not a really good match of perfume.
I gave her a nudge on her shoulder before coldly saying, "Move a little. A can't breath."
She ingenuously nodded and gave way for a small gap to sit in between us. Much comfortable. She uncomprehendingly stared at the free sailing puffy clouds that floated in the vast cool blue sky above us and raised her hands over her head before yelling, "Cool Blue Sky!"
Stupid.
Pathetic.
Such an Idiot.
She closed her eyes for relaxation before retrieving her hands to her sides and let drowsiness invade her with her head, instinctively laid on my shoulder l. I halted from writing as I placed the things aside first. Autumn leaves hovered in the air, cool wind rustled in trees, free sailing clouds, flying birds and a Mikan Sakura beside me. Everything was perfect.
A constipated smile came to my lips when I think about it—a perfect life. But the smile shortly-lived as I stole a quick glance at her and placed a hand on top of her unmoving hand. Like almost automatically, her eyes snapped open and she removed her head on my shoulder as she—by now—suspiciously threw a glare at my direction. She dropped her head to the ground and with her eyes fixed on our rejoined hands. She looked up at me and glared more daggers while apprehensively pointing an index finger down to my blameless hand. "And what is THIS for, Mr. Smart-assed pervert?"
I insipidly dragged my observant eyes to the corner to see her with a mused smirk on my face. "Requirements."
"…For what?" She distastefully asked, scrunching her nose up in disgust.
"For me to resume writing." I plainly answered with a grin. "If only you were born genius like me."
"Hah!" She shockingly stared at me, a triumphant beam on her face. "You grinned!"
My face fell for a second but I quickly managed to cover it with a bland look. "I didn't." I simply lied, clicking my tongue with a mischievous smirk playing on my lips, "It's what you call mask, Mikan."
"You just called me…" She blinked her eyes once before disbelievingly shaking her head, "You called me by my first name."
Mikan.
"Am I restricted to?"
"Well..no? I just thought that it's a good thing. And plus, I don't really mind if you call me like that. Yeah, hearing you calling me by my name is a good thing although it seemed so awkward and strange but I'm sure I'll get used to it somehow."
"But calling you Polkadots sounds better."
"Why you—HEY!"
Clever? That's me.
In the end, we were still romantic—hopelessly romantic. Hah. I childish love, it is.
"Wanna go the library?"
To be continued…
I know. Not the best compared to others Drastic.
But anyways, I am glad that I came up with an idea like this. Hah. Beat that.
( But please, don't try to point out of the patheticalness in it, I'm totally aware of it. I suck TT_TT )
Lame attempts of humor But off with that, how was the first chapter? Is it good? Did I make you guys happy? I hope so. Hell I wanna know what's in your mind. Speak up! Heck it would also make me happy if you send in some reviews
And yeah, I'm making this a 3-shots story! (Not to mention—too short and random. Sigh. )
Till next time,
—Coffee
June 1, 2012