Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha.
Sorry people, when an idea comes...
Lullaby
'Keh. You're late Kagome.'
InuYasha sat cross legged against the wooden wall of the old Bone Eater's Well, his arms crossed and a scowl etched onto his face. He huffed.
Shippou sighed. And he'd promised to keep an eye on the exasperated hanyou because...?
The young kitsune's stomach suddenly grumbled. With much appreciation, Shippou then remembered the extra pocky and ninja food Kagome had left for him before returning to her world. Filled with glee, the little youkai reached inside his kimono and pulled out three long sticks of chocolate pocky, shoving them into his mouth and swallowing them in one go.
"Yum..."
Okay, for extra pocky, he'd do virtually anything.
But now, as the hanyou continued to sigh and huff and scowl and ceaselessly tap his foot, over and over...
Hm. Maybe pocky couldn't buy anything. Shippou hoped the young miko would forgive him later.
'Sorry Kagome.'
Shippou sprung to his feet, jumped up onto InuYasha's leg and demmanded his attention.
"C'mon InuYasha! If you miss her so much then why don't you just go and get her already!"
InuYasha's eyebrow twitched and and a vein began to pulse violently on his head. He gritted his teeth so tight, Shippou could actually hear them grinding together. He backed off of the inu hanyou's leg; it looked like the InuYasha was about to explode! Things could get messy...
Finally, InuYasha calmed himself enough to speak somewhat coherently.
"DON'T even think for one SECOND that I miss that stubborn wench. She can spend as long as she wants in that goddamn world of hers - she can stay there for all I care!!"
Shippou found himself sighing yet again. This particular hanyou was pretty much impossible to talk to sometimes, but he was more so today. He usually only got this bad when a certain miko was absent from his side. And, well, that certain miko had already been gone for three whole days...
'That baka InuYasha.' Shippou thought. 'He's always so miserable when Kagome leaves, but then, when she's here... he always drives her away. I'll never get him. Not even if I live to be 600.'
InuYasha continued to fume to himself, but he couldn't help but ponder Shippou's words. Alright, yes, he'd admit, he missed the stubborn miko Kagome. Not LOTS, but he did. A little.
Alright. Maybe lots.
He always felt like this when she was away. Alone, lost, confused, irritated, insecure, frustrated... unsure of himself.
He knew that he probably deserved this. He was the one to usually push Kagome away, like when she defended that infuriating Ookami youkai Kouga - AFTER he'd KIDNAPPED her! He'd been so worried, so afraid for her safety... and then she'd just blown him off and helped that idiot wolf. One would have been a fool to think there wasn't anything going on between the two, and that possibility had irked him to no end. Had Kagome really fallen for Kouga? Hmm... unlikely, in such a short space of time, but not impossible...
Not that InuYasha cared, of course. It wasn't like he felt that way about Kagome! She was Kagome for crying out loud, his jewel detector, a friend at the most, but not someone he... not someone he... felt... like that for. She was also Kikyou's reincarnation. To top that, she was also from another time. 500 years from the future, to be exact, she shouldn't even be born yet.
Still, despite all those complications... all the doubts and impossibilities that came with InuYasha's relationship with Kagome, he couldn't imagine his life without her in it. Even if it were him that drove Kagome away, he never wanted her to leave him permanently. Sometimes, anger was easier to deal with than the more... 'fragile' emotions. Like the sense of loss and loneliness when you knew that the person you cared for might not always be with you. When that person had other duties, had a family who loved and needed her somewhere else across time.
Yes... anger was easier to deal with. Easier to express.
The fact was, InuYasha feared getting any closer to Kagome than he currently was. If he lost her someday... and could never get her back...
"Keh."
Shippou looked up and studdied his troubled friend. He no longer looked angry or hot tempered... but instead downhearted and melancholy. So unlike him...
"InuYasha?"
InuYasha closed his golden eyes.
"What is it runt?"
"Y'know... Kagome said she'd be gone at least two or three days this time. She's been gone three, and even though she made me promise to watch you make sure you didn't follow after her or something..."
InuYasha's eyebrow twitched in irritation.
"...I think it'd be alright if you went and got her now. She's gotta be ready to come back by now... and, maybe you don't miss her, but I know she'll be missing you."
That caught the inu's attention. Kagome... missing him? He knew how he felt whenever she left for her own time, but Kagome was the one who always left anyway. She couldn't possibily feel the same.
InuYasha looked back over his shoulder, down at the old well. It was an intriguing possibility though...
Without another word, InuYasha stood, leant down on the balls of his feet, and then leapt into the well, becomming surrounded in ethereal blue light.
Shippou jumped onto the lip of the well, noting the hanyou's disappearance. That hadn't taken as long as he'd figured...
The little youkai's expression suddenly turned slightly sad and solemn. He knew InuYasha and Kagome missed eachother greatly when they were apart... but did Kagome miss him too? Did she miss them all like they did her when she left? Everything was always so full of life and at peace when Kagome was here, she radiated a rare tranquility when she was around... everything felt right. She was like a mother to him, a sister to Sango and Miroku.
What would life be like, if she were never to return?
-x-X-x-
InuYasha came up through the well house, leaping through the great wooden doors of the shed and bounding across the shinto shrine grounds. Gathering momentum and speed, InuYasha leant back on his haunches once more and jumped up onto the ledge bellow Kagome's window, sliding it open (as she usually left it unlocked) and stepping inside. He was puzzled to find that Kagome was nowhere in the room.
'Wierd. I wonder where...?'
A wonderful, soothing and positively enthralling sound suddenly filled InuYasha's sensitive ears. It was like a wonderous caress to the furry appendages, he couldn't ever remember hearing something so beautiful. Or familiar, for that matter.
Following the source of the alluring melody, InuYasha found himself tredging out the back door of the house, and back into the shrine grounds. Across the expanse of ground, he found another small wooden shed, with its door slightly ajar, and light shining from within. He concluded this was where the wonderful sound was coming from. In mere seconds, he was standing infront of the shed's glass window, his arms folded across his chest as he stared through it inquisitively, his honey irises alight with curiousity. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped slightly when he saw just who was behind the glorious tune's existance. Kagome.
InuYasha stared as Kagome ran her long, slender fingers across what appeared to be black and white... er, sticks were those?
Kagome's eyelids were slanted down as she concentrated on the music she created with just the touch of her finger tips. Left to right her hands went, her fingers moving up and down the 'sticks' so gracefully, long silken locks of ebony hair falling over her shoulder as her posture moved forward from where she sat on a wooden stool.
InuYasha gulped. His cheeks felt uncannily hot, and his heart was beating a million miles per second, any faster and he feared it would explode straight out of his chest. The hanyou continued to watch Kagome though, he just couldn't tear himself away...
Suddenly, Kagome flinched and stopped her wonderous music, sitting with her back straight on her stool, becomming completely still. She inclined her head to where InuYasha stood watching from the window...
'Aw, crap.'
"InuYasha?" 'Crap, crap, crap!'
"InuYasha, what are you doing out there?"
"Er..."
There was no escaping it now. He'd been caught, staring at Kagome like some kind of nutter, completely transfixed by her and her movements and her music... him!
He could feel the beads of sweat rolling down his face. She was probably going to sit him into the next century now for spying on her like that through the window.
"Hey... you alright InuYasha?"
The poor hanyou yelped out of sheer surprise and nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw that Kagome was standing outside and right next to him! His hands flew up in defense.
"I er... I was- I mean that is to say I was- sort of- I- er...."
Kami, he sounded like such an idiot.
Kagome just continued to stare up at him expectantly with her big, brown eyes. When she got nothing any further coherent from him, she tilted her head to the side questioningly. Her hanyou looked pretty... well, riled up.
Noting how red his face had become, Kagome reached up and placed what she hoped was a cool hand on his forehead.
"Are you sick or something InuYasha? You feel really hot and... your cheeks are all red..."
"K-Keh! W-What are ya talkin' 'bout K'gome?! Nothin' wrong with m-me!"
She raised an eyebrow.
"You sure? You're all... I dunno, jumpy."
He swallowed again. This girl didn't miss anything, did she?
"S-Shut up would ya?! There's nothing wrong with me! Yer fussin' over nothin'! Like always wench..."
Kagome's expression went from concerned to slightly hurt.
"Is it so wrong for me to worry about you then?"
"You don't need to worry about me wench! There's nothing wrong for crying out loud, hardly is most of the time!"
Kagome's expression went from hurt to angry to slightly bored. Why did their conversations always end up like this? InuYasha wondered the same thing, regretting what he'd said after seeing Kagome's expression.
"Look, if there's nothing wrong with you, then why are you even here InuYasha? I told you I'd be back in two or three days! You don't need to come and get me!"
"It has been three days wench!"
Kagome went from fuming to surprised. She brought a finger to her chin.
"Oh. Has it really?"
InuYasha sweat dropped.
"Er... yeah!"
"Huh."
The two stood in silence for a little while. Strangely, it was InuYasha, who chose to brake the silence.
"Er... hey...K-Kagome?"
The young miko looked up and back into his golden eyes. She saw an unfamiliar emotion in the hanyou's eyes... was he...nervous? Odd.
"Yes, InuYasha?"
InuYasha kept his gaze on his bare feet. Why was this so difficult? He only wanted her to answer one little question, there was nothing unorthodox about it.
"Earlier... what were you doing?"
"Hm?"
"You know, you were the one making that beau- I mean, that sound... music right?"
Kagome forrowed her brow in thought for a moment. Oh! So that was it? InuYasha had heard her playing - that must have been why he was standing at the window watching her... she didn't suppose he'd ever heard such an instrument before.
"Er yeah, music, I was playing the piano. See, I used to play a lot when I was a bit younger. I always thought gramps had gotten rid of our old piano, but it turns out he just moved it over into the storage shed here and- "
"Wow, hold up - what's a piah-no?"
"Well, it's a type of instrument. Come here, I'll show you."
Kagome reached forward and talk one of InuYasha's large clawed hands in her smaller, more fragile hand. InuYasha felt his cheeks heat up again and was about to pull away when Kagome pulled him forward and steered him into the shed with the piah-no. She sat back down on the stool and (much to InuYasha's chargrin) pulled him down onto the stool so that he sat next to her. The hanyou became very conscious of just how close they were. Pratically touching.
"Er...?"
"Look, you put your fingers here..."
Shivers shot up InuYasha's spine where Kagome clutched his hand and placed them on the...?
"These are called the keys. They create the different notes needed in a tune or melody."
"...Right." He pressed down on one of the keys, and a single high note rang out through the small shed.
"That's it."
"...Yup." But in all honesty, he wasn't all that interested in what the contraption was or how it worked... he just really wanted to hear the music she'd been playing earlier again. Now that he really thought about, it really had sounded familiar, and oddly... soothing to him. Where had he heard it before?
"Kagome, the music you were playing earlier on this thing... could you do it again?" InuYasha asked, still not quite meeting her gaze, but rather prefering to look down at his hands this time.
Kagome gave him a small, fond smile. Inside, she was quite happy and excited. He... he really liked what she'd been playing before? She nodded, hoping not to appear to eager.
"Sure. It was a lullaby. Mama used to sing it to me when I was little."
'A lullaby?'
InuYasha didn't have time to ponder that thought, because Kagome had started playing again.
And, once again, InuYasha found himself utterly entranced by the lullaby's beautiful tune.
"I think there's a story behind it..." Kagome explained.
InuYasha wasn't really listening. He only listened to the musical tune that escaped Kagome's delicate fingertips every time she pressed down on a key.
"Hundreds of years ago, there was this little youkai. Well, stories of youkai used to scare me when I was little, so mama always used to say it was a neko, like Buyo. Anyway, the little youkai had loving parents, but he'd always been ostrasized because of his small size, when most youkai of his kind were known for being big and bulky and strong. So they shunned him, cast him away..."
An old, nearly forgotten memory suddenly replayed in InuYasha's head.
-X-
A young, six year old InuYasha sat in his mother's lap as she sang and hummed to him. This was his own little lullaby, one his beloved mama would sing to him every night before he fell asleep. There was a story behind the lullaby, one of a young youkai who had been shut out by the rest of his kind, forced to survive on his own. He'd had only one true friend in his life...
His mother's angelic voice filled the hanyou's young ears.
"Little youkai,
why is it you cry so?
dry your tears
do not weep for me
I have left you for a time,
but do you not see?
I am here,
I am all around you
I will be the light that guides you home
I will be the stars that watch over you
I will never stop burning
I will burn forever
forever in you
my beloved."
-x-X-x-
InuYasha didn't notice at first when Kagome started singing like the warm, soothing voice of his mother in the memory. The miko's voice was soothing too. It made him feel safe, wanted, like he'd never be truly alone.
His worries before, about how one day Kagome might leave him, or end up stuck in her own time forever after the jewel was completed... the lullaby she played and sung helped to quell those worries. If it ever happened, if the worst did come to pass...
"I have left you for a time
but do you not see?
I am here,
I am all around you..."
She was right. Kagome'd always be with him, she'd promised him that a long time ago, he should know.
"I will never stop burning
I will burn forever
forever in you
my beloved."
Finally, the lullaby came to a close.
Kagome put her hands in her lap, and couldn't help the blush that rose in her cheeks. She really hadn't meant to start singing like that, just play the tune, but it was how her mother had always conveyed it to her - through a song.
She looked meekly up at InuYasha, unable to hault the blush, but still looking to seek his approval. She hoped he wouldn't laugh or make fun of her... but then, why would he? Sure, InuYasha could be self-obsessed, arrogant and stubborn... but deep down, he had a very caring, sensitive and compassionate heart. He would understand.
Kagome smiled shyly up at him, but her face became as red as InuYasha's haori at the smouldering look InuYasha was currently giving her. It was like he was staring straight into her soul. Their faces were so close, so near.
"E-Er... w-well..." Now it was Kagome who stuttered.
InuYasha, noticing how close they were, blushed himself and pulled away a little. Only a little.
"S-So... you're mother used to sing that to ya, eh?"
Kagome nodded quickly.
"Y-Yeah. It was right after my dad passed away, and that song always made me feel better. Y'know, like I wasn't alone, like dad's memory would always live on in me... or something like that." Kagome said quietly, slowly looking up at him again.
"You're old man huh?"
"Yeah. Whenever I feel alone actually, I just think back to this lullaby and... I feel a lot better."
There was a comfortable silence between the two this time. There was a fear the two shared; the fear of being alone one day. However, both had unknowingly helped the other see through that fear. That, no matter what happened in the future, no matter what changed, neither would ever be without the other. Not truly. And, that one day, there was a chance they'd meet again.
"Kagome?"
Kagome looked up at him fully this time and smiled prettily at him. A smile she only seemed to reserve for him, and him only.
"Yeah, InuYasha?"
"You er, ready to go back now?" InuYasha asked, averting his gaze and gulping yet again.
-Owari-
Okay, well, this wasn't supposed to be anything majorly special, and I'm pretty sure the 'lullaby' I included in the middle sucks like crap, but I have to admit, I quite like this. It came out better than I thought it would anyway. And much longer.
It was inspired by 'Bella's Lullaby', off of the Twilight soundtrack - the film I FINALLY got to see today! Yay! Not as good as the book, but definately worth the long, LONG wait :D
The next chapter of 'Starlight' should be up over the next few days, at the end of the week at the most. Sorry it's taking so long, but I've had a little trouble getting my ideas straight for the next chapter and everything. I think it's coming together now though, sorta...
Please, review the story! I actually ended up spending the whole night on this. Very unlike me O_o
Merry Christmas to all! (In case I don't get 'Starlight' updated by then.)
-Is now edited =D.