They Told Me
Summary: Why had it happened to them? Why had it happened at all? There were so many unanswered questions…
Pairings: Sam/Jack, Daniel/Janet
Spoilers: Heroes
Rating: PG-13
A/N: I was making a music video, and then I watched a clip from Heroes…and then ended up watching the whole ep…and here I am…
OoO
"Colonel I need more time to stabilise the patient, he can't be moved yet," Janet's voice was barley audible over the radio.
Sam continued firing at the Jaffa who were attacking them. They weren't gonna last much longer in this position.
"Sir, we have to fall back!" she shouted across the battlefield.
Just at that moment a large rocket was fired, exploding among a group of Jaffa, they were thrown in all directions. Sam continued firing. He obviously hadn't heard her, or he was thinking the same thing, but trying to figure out how they could possibly escape.
The next thing she knew she heard a blast and saw out of the corner of her eye the explosion of it hitting something. Or someone….
She looked to see Jack falling to the ground. Without thinking she stood up and began running towards him.
"SIR!" she shouted as she ran towards him.
She saw him hit the ground, a ship flew over his exact position as he fell. A shadow cast over his face. She felt bullets whirring around her, staff blasts coming from the other direction. She felt one hit the ground behind her but she didn't care.
She dropped to her knees by his side and put her hand on his chest, looking at his wound. She reached forward and felt for a pulse. There was nothing.
"No," she said. "Jack you are not going to die."
She pulled out her radio. "Janet, Colonel O'Neill's down! Repeat Colonel O'Neill is down."
There was no reply.
"Janet? I need your help!" she said.
More silence. Then she heard someone hit the button.
"Sam, she's down! Janet's down, she's gone," Daniel said, panic in his voice.
Janet's down, she's gone.
Sam let the radio go.
"SIR YOU HAVE TO WAKE UP," she shouted, feeling for his pulse again.
There was something there. It was slow and weak, but it was a pulse. It was something.
Janet was gone.
Jack wasn't far off.
She fought back tears as she felt Teal'c approaching them.
"Teal'c we have to get him back to the SGC," she said.
Teal'c nodded and picked him up. The two of them, Jack over Teal'c's shoulders, headed back towards the gate, ducking fire from the Jaffa. Sam was close behind Teal'c, covering them by firing an occasionally burst of bullets in the direction the Jaffa were coming from.
Sam lifted her hand and knocked on the door of her friend's house. She hadn't wanted to leave the SGC, but someone had to bring the news, and it was better done face to face than over the phone.
The door was pulled open to reveal a dishevelled looking 18-year-old.
"Hey Sam…" Cassie said.
She looked like she'd just rolled out of bed. She opened her eyes wider and looked at Sam suspiciously.
"Hey lighten up, you look like someone died," Cassie said.
At the look she got in response, Cassie realised something she'd said had hit the wrong cord. Sam stared at her, blankly.
"No…" Cassie said. "Who?"
"Cassie…" Sam started.
"Not Mom," Cassie said. "Don't tell me it's Mom."
Sam was fighting back tears extremely hard, Cassie could see it. She looked away.
"SAM! Tell me who it is!" Cassie said.
Sam continued looking away. "She was shot…she was trying to save someone…Daniel….he saw it…"
Sam looked at Cassie. "I'm sorry."
"And the person she was trying to save?" Cassie asked, swallowing hard and blinking away tears.
"He's alive…barely…we don't know for how much longer," Sam said. "So is Colonel O'Neill…"
"I need to sit down," Cassie said.
Sam nodded. The two of them walked into the house, and Sam shut the door behind her. Cassie slowly walked to the living room and sat down, her facial expression showing that she was trying to let the news sink in.
Sam sat down next to her, staring blankly ahead. She didn't want to talk, she couldn't, not without bursting into tears again. She didn't want to cry.
"How long can you stay?" Cassie asked.
"Not long," Sam said. "I have to get back to him. I've already lost my best friend…I don't know…"
She stopped and blinked away the tears that were forming. Cassie leaned across and hugged her awkwardly.
"He'll be OK," she said. "He better be…SG-1 are the only people I have left. I lost my own people and now Mom…"
She choked on her words and burst into tears. Sam did the same. They sat there for what seemed like hours, but was really only a few minutes. Sam's cell phone rang suddenly. She moved away from Cassie and pulled it out of her pocket. Looking at the number she sighed. It was the SGC…that could only mean bad news.
"Carter," she said, picking it up.
"Hi," Daniel's voice was barely recognisable.
"Daniel…" she said.
"Where are you?" he asked.
"With Cassie," Sam replied.
"Oh…" Daniel said. "I was just gonna head over there…"
"Ok," Sam said.
"You should come back here…" Daniel said. "It's not looking good."
Sam sighed. "Ok…I'll wait for you."
"See you," Daniel said, hanging up before she had a chance to do so.
"Bye…" she said to the engaged tone.
She put her cell down on the table in front of her.
"Daniel's on his way," Sam said.
"I gathered," Cassie replied, then her eyes filled with tears again, she wiped them away angrily. "Why her? What did she ever do wrong to anyone?"
Sam didn't know what to say. She felt the same. Janet wasn't a warrior, she shouldn't have even been out there.
"Why?" Cassie echoed, very quietly. "It SUCKS."
"I know," Sam said.
"It…I can't believe it," Cassie said. "Are you sure?"
Sam nodded slowly.
"What happens now?" Cassie asked.
"We'll take care of you," Sam said.
"What about the SGC? What about you? What about Daniel?" her voice cracked again. "She loved him, she probably never said anything. Well maybe she didn't love him, but she cared about him…a lot. And now she's DEAD and he'll NEVER KNOW! That's NOT FAIR! Why don't people just SAY THINGS?"
She was screaming at the top of her lungs. Sam grabbed Cassie and pulled her into another hug.
"Hey, calm down," Sam said.
"It's not fair," Cassie mumbled again. "It's not fair. Not her."
She started shaking in Sam's arms. Sam was trying her hardest not to break down. She was the adult, the soldier, she had to be strong. They stayed there in silence till Daniel arrived.
Sam answered the door, leaving Cassie alone on the couch. She pulled open to see Daniel standing there. He was silent, even more so than normal.
"You cared about her," Sam said.
"We all did," Daniel replied, looking up at her, a coldness in his eyes.
"No…you cared more – and she felt the same," Sam said, pushing past him out onto the balcony.
"I know," Daniel said, entering the house. "You still have a chance, don't let it go."
The words hit her hard. He was talking about Jack. He was right. Jack was still alive. She didn't wanna lose him, especially not before she'd told him how she felt. She didn't reply to Daniel. She nodded slightly and turned to make her way down the stairs.
"I mean it Sam," Daniel said.
She paused slightly and then kept walking. She pulled the door of the car open and got in. She sat there for a long moment, staring at Janet's house. Knowing she would never again go there and spend time with her best friend. She would never ring her late at night and talk about their girly things. When she was injured or sick she'd be going to some doctor, not to her friend.
She felt very alone. Daniel had cut himself off completely from everyone in a matter of hours, Jack was lying on a hospital bed, unconscious and living off life support.
And Janet was gone.
Forever.
She turned on the engine and sped away, not wanting to be there anymore.
OoO
The nurses walked past her, ignoring her completely. If Janet had been there she would have been sent away hours ago. But she wasn't.
Sam gripped the sheets on the bed beneath her, determined not to burst into tears again. She watched Jack's form, the only movement was the rising up and down of his chest as the respirators breathed life into him.
She was going to lose him, him and Janet. The two most important people in her life were gone.
Or at least would be gone before long.
She pulled her legs up, putting her feet on the edge of the bed and resting her head on her knees. A nurse walked up and checked Jack's vitals.
"Lieutenant Rush, I think we can take the respirator off," the nurse said.
Sam looked up at the familiar name. Jonas had once tried to make Sam see if the Lieutenant would be interested in going out with him. The two of them checked something before taking Jack off the respirator. He could breathe on his own.
Sam let some of her anxiety leave her, at least for that moment. He was getting better. He was going to be OK.
Hope rose within her, she was going to have her second chance.
Suddenly guilt rose within her. She hadn't contacted Pete for days now, he would be worried. She'd completely forgotten about him. Looking at her CO lying on the bed she stood up and walked over to the infirmary phone.
"Can I use?" Sam asked the nurse, pointing at the phone.
The nurse nodded and smiled. Sam picked it up and dialled Pete's number.
"Shanahan," he said.
"Hey Pete, its me," Sam said, surprised at her own voice, how sleep-deprived and down she sounded.
"Sam? You OK?" he asked. "I tired to call your home, no one was there."
She stayed silent. She didn't know how to reply. She didn't wanna break down on the phone, here in the infirmary.
"Sam?" Pete asked.
"I just rang to say, I'll be out of contact for a few days," Sam said.
"Sam you don't sound good…" he said. "Are you OK? You're scaring me…"
"Janet's dead," Sam said, coldly. "Colonel O'Neill lying unconscious on a hospital bed…"
Now it was Pete's turn to be silent.
"Look…Sam…I'm sorry," he said.
"I'm gonna go, I'll call you in a few days," Sam said.
"Yeah…I hope you're OK," he said.
"Bye," she said, hanging up.
I hope you're OK
What the hell was he thinking? OK? How could she possibly be OK? Her best friend was dead.
She breathed in deeply. It wasn't Pete's fault, he'd said what he'd genuinely meant, he wanted her to be OK. She wasn't so sure she would be.
She walked back over to where she had been sitting earlier and returned to her position of resting her head on her knees, watching Jack.
"Sam…"
She looked around. Daniel was standing at the end of the bed, tapping it with his finger.
"I'm sorry about earlier, it was…wrong of me," Daniel said.
"It's OK," Sam replied.
Daniel wandered over and sat down next to her. "No, it's not. I…just because I screwed up doesn't mean I have a right to tell you what to do with your life."
"I thought he was dead," Sam said. "I watched him fall after he got hit, I ran over…he didn't have a pulse…I realised at that moment that I couldn't live without him being there…"
She choked on her words, resting her head back on her knees. Daniel put his arm on her back and rubbed it slightly.
"He'll be OK," Daniel said.
"Janet isn't," Sam said. "Why do we get to live when she dies? Who decides?"
Daniel shook his head. "No one…there's nothing anyone can do to change it. When I was ascended, I watched things happen, I couldn't do anything to help…yet I wanted to. People like Janet die every day, and people like the Goa'uld live on. Nothing about it is fair, but there's nothing we can do to change it."
They both fell silent, sitting with each other was enough comfort. At that exact moment they were all the other had left. Teal'c had yet to make an appearance since the event. He seemed to be dealing with in his own way. Alone.
"How's Cassie?" Sam asked.
"She's dealing," Daniel said. "She'll be OK….I think."
Sam nodded, still watching Jack, willing him to wake up. She wanted him to wake up now. The fact that everyone seemed to think he would be OK wasn't enough for her. She'd always lived with the false belief that her and her friends would always find a way to come back. Even when Daniel had died, he'd come back, only reinforcing her stupid beliefs.
But now Janet had died. And it hurt. She would never trust in the word "safety" ever again. The planet had been 'safe', the mission had been 'safe'…but look what had happened.
Jack moved slightly.
Sam lifted her head up. "Sir?"
He didn't respond. Not that she had expected him to. But it was a sign that he was now sleeping, not lying unconscious. Or maybe that was wishful thinking.
"Sam you should get some sleep," Daniel said.
"So should you," she replied.
"I did, at Cassie's," he said.
She noted that he called it 'Cassie's' and not 'Janet's' as he would have a few days earlier.
"If he wakes up I'll come get you…" Daniel said. "It's what Janet would want."
Sam closed her eyes, suddenly realising exactly how tired she was. Janet would have wanted her to sleep. She knew Daniel was right.
"Ok," she said. "For Janet. But the second he's awake I wanna be here."
Daniel nodded. "Good night, Sam."
She stood up and smiled at him slightly. "Good night."
She walked over to Jack's bed and placed her hand on top of his. Normally they hid their emotions, especially in front of others. But it didn't seem to matter now.
"Sir…if you can hear me…please wake up," she said quietly. "We…we lost Janet…I don't wanna lose you too…"
She waited, as if expecting a reply. After a few moments, when she'd finally decided he wasn't going to miraculously wake up, she squeezed his hand and made her way out of the infirmary. She avoided looking at Daniel, knowing he would have that knowing look in his eyes. One she didn't want to see right at that moment.
OoO
A few days later
"He's awake."
Sam looked up to see Daniel standing in the doorway.
"He woke up about ten minutes ago, I told him I'd come and get you," Daniel said.
"Thanks," she said, closing her laptop lid and standing up.
She walked towards the exit, only to be stopped by Daniel grabbing her arm.
"Remember," he said, smiling weakly.
Sam nodded and he let go. She walked to the infirmary room where she knew he would be. She stood outside the door for a long moment, debating whether or not to say anything.
But what could she say?
She could only try….
She pushed the door open, only realising afterwards that she probably should have knocked.
He was just pulling down his t-shirt over the dressing.
"Sir…" she said, walking into the room and letting the door shut behind her. "I heard you were up and around."
"Yeah," he said, looking in pain. "Still a little…tender."
Trying to push himself up using the bed and the desk next to it. Sam nodded. She had so much she wanted to say, but she couldn't think of how to express it.
"Lucky that staff blast hit you where it did," she said, nodding. "That new vest insert worked well…"
"Didn't help Frasier much," Jack muttered, still seated.
Sam shook her head and looked down, determined not to cry, and also determined to build up the courage to say something, anything, that would show him how she felt. Seeming to notice this, Jack pushed himself up.
"How's Cassie?" he asked, trying to distract her from bursting into tears.
"She's a strong kid, she survives, you know," Sam said.
Jack pulled his jacket on. "Yeah…You speaking at the memorial?"
So Daniel had already told him about that. She nodded. If she didn't tell him now she wouldn't get the chance. It had to be now, while she still had the courage.
"Sir, I just wanted to say…" she paused, breathing in deeply, trying not to cry. "When you were lying there I…"
I realised how much I loved you? She couldn't say that…she couldn't bring herself to do it. She breathed in deeply again, she really didn't wanna burst into tears. She was fighting them hard now, but they were tears of relief, that he was here, standing in front of her.
She looked up and met his eyes. His stare was concerned, she saw reflected in his eyes the same emotions she was feeling.
"I'm really glad you're OK," she finally said.
Now she couldn't stop the tears, they were clouding her vision. She could see him moving closer to her. Her eyes cleared slightly and she looked up at him. She wanted to reach forward and hug him, hold him and never let go.
"C'mere," he said, putting his arms around her, at the same time she put hers around him.
She never wanted to let go. She wanted to hold him there, knowing he was alive, forever. She felt him moved his head slightly and he kissed her on the neck. She closed her eyes again, squeezing him closer. She never wanted the moment to end…
OoO
A/N: Hey guys!! Watcha think!? I finished this in the ad breaks of NCIS lol! So I'm sorry if any of it sounds a bit…disjointed, cos my train of thought kept getting interrupted…please review :D