Author's Note: This was written while under the influence of alcohol and too many Profiler DVDs. No actual cereal was injured in the making of this story.
Cereal Killer
"Jack? What are you doing?" Samantha asked her lover as he stalked past her with a large knife towards the kitchen.
After two blissful years together, she was used to Jack's little quirks. It wasn't that it bothered her anymore when Jack killed, hell Sam often assisted. Bloodlust made Jack amorous and Sam loved being around for that. But damn it, why had he gotten his favorite knife from the living room at 8 AM? Jack always liked to kill at night and they didn't have any prisoners at the moment, did they? A stream of cursing and strange noises from the kitchen, got Sam's attention and she set her coffee down and got off the couch.
Walking into the kitchen, she saw Jack standing at the table over the mangled and mutilated remnants of a cardboard box. There were sugar pops covering the table, as well as quite a bit of the floor. Jack looked up guiltily trying to balance his knife while opening a small cellophane package.
"Sweetie, I thought we agreed, you would let me get the toy out of the cereal boxes from now on?" Samantha asked indulgently.
Jack shrugged and sat down his knife. The cellophane package was cast to the side and he stalked over to her through the mess. He grabbed her in a passionate embrace and pushed her to the floor amid the mess. As his hands roved her body, Samantha began to giggle.
"What?" he demanded.
"I just realized," Samantha laughed. "I'm married to a cereal killer!"
Then Samantha pulled Jack's mouth to hers and together as they made love, they killed all the cereal.