BLACK SUN SUPERNOVA
A post-Breaking Dawn, Twilight fanfiction, written by 'Whimsical Darcy'.

Disclaimer: I do not own the 'Twilight' series or any of the respective characters created by the wonderful Stephanie Meyer. This is merely a work of fanfiction written by a devoted fan, who can't get enough of vampires and shapeshifters and romance. I also do not own the sng lyrics in this chapter: "We'll Meet Again" (composed and written by Ross Parker and Hughie Charles) and "Halfway to Heaven" (by The Morning Benders / POP ETC).

A.N. Hello readers, and welcome to the first chapter of 'Black Sun Supernova'. Please note that this fanfic incorporates elements from both the books and the films, and will be written solely from Renesmee's POV. Also, as the rating suggests, the story will (eventually) contain mature themes. Depending on how things turn out by the end of the story, I may or may not return to it from Jacob's POV. But that's skipping waaaay ahead... For now, though I have a vague idea of where I want this version of the story to go, I'm a very organic writer, so even I don't how how the final chapter will read yet. I do however, very much intend to upload a finished fanfic that I can be proud of.

I've never published any Twilight fanfiction before, but I've written loads of unfinished musings ever since I fell in love with the books and the movies over ten years ago. I recently re-watched the entire film series (thank you Netflix!) and realised that to this day, the two characters I still want to re-visit are Jacob and Nessie. Breaking Dawn ends with their story just beginning really, and I'm still keeping my fingers crossed for Meyer to write the official version of how their lives develop together. For now though, hopefully my imagination will fill an empty gap. Most importantly, hopefully you'll enjoy reading this journey as much as I enjoy writing it. I'm a sucker for rarely sharing my writing, so all I can ask from you in return, is to please be constructive if you're going to flame.

So without further ado...

Chapter 1: "To the Forks that I know"

So will you please say "Hello", to the folks that I know;
Tell them I won't be long.

Dame Vera Lynn's vintage voice crackled from an antique Gramophone of rich mahogany and bronze, which had been gifted to me on my 4th Birthday. By human standards, that means I'd been 10 years old, even though I was already re-working my way through Shakespeare's plays and sonnets. Grandpa Carlisle said that the record player had been salvaged from the nineteen-thirties, but I think he'd paid a decent sum of money to have it restored to its current, perfectly functioning state. Upon unwrapping the birthday present, I remember transcending from being absolutely amazed and elated, to feeling incredibly sad. Can you image how many lives this one, single object had lived through? I had suddenly wished that I had the power to re-live memories by touching objects, and ultimately, it made me sad to think that those memories were now lost to the passage of time. Dad had held me then, and told me that there are memories in music too, if you listen hard enough. I guess you could say that my fascination with sounds from a bygone era officially sparked from that day forth.

I'd listened to this particular song a dozen times before, but today, it provided a melancholy soundtrack to my bitter-sour mood. I may not be quite so antique as the gramophone, but I'm certainly an 'original' teenager. Much like the somewhat out of place object that garnished the corner of my square bedroom, I had spent the whole seven years of my life – well, that is to say, almost seven years; never quite feeling as though I fit in with the rest of the world's décor. My family liked to tell me that the feeling was mutual, because they didn't fit in either. The thing is, as much as I tried to be 'one of them', I was always perpetually caught between two worlds: Vampire, and Human.

They'll be happy to know, that as you saw me go;
I was singing this song.

With a heavy sigh, I broke my stony silence to meticulously study the various google maps displayed in separate window tabs on my laptop screen. My gaze following the Calawah River as it cut through the small township known as 'Forks' on its path towards the endless forest. The Olympic forest had been my birthplace and, despite my many global 'study vacations' as dad and grandpa liked to call them; it had been the one and only true home I'd ever known.

We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know when;
But I know we'll meet again some sunny day.

This was the part of the song where Dame Vera Lynn was wrong. It would be a long, long time until the Cullens would be welcome in Forks again, or Washington at all, for that matter. According to Grandpa Carlisle, the undeniable patriarch of the family, it would be a good hundred or so years before we could ever return to our preferred home. His hospital co-workers had been questioning his flawlessly un-ageing complexion since before my mom had been turned, so the 'healthy lifestyle' excuses was like saying pigs could fly. Carlisle had looked amazingly good when he was 'almost touching forty', so you can imagine what they thought now that he'd finally celebrated the big 4-0. There was no way he was just using anti-ageing creams. Hello big-city plastic surgery, bye-bye small-town integrity. To the youngest member of the household, aka me, it was just further proof that being physically frozen in time for all eternity isn't always all it's cracked up to be. Eventually, you have to make yourself disappear, and become nothing more than a memory.

Keep smiling through, just like you always do;
'Til the blue skies, drive the dark clouds far away.

My mother's gift of chocolate brown eyes shifted to the next map on the screen, and I felt my nose involuntarily scrunch like I just caught a bad odor, as I recalled everything Carlisle had said about 'Randolph County, West Virginia'. He'd called a family meeting about a week ago, and carefully broken the 'good news' to me using very carefully selected words. I realised then that I was the only family member who didn't already know what Carlisle was gearing up to say. Even Jake hadn't managed to convince me that this was the first time he was hearing about the scenic rivers and waterfalls; the caverns to explore and plenty of forests full of wild game for hunting, not to mention tall mountains to scale.

Just like I'd done a week ago, when I first found out where we'd be relocating to; I matched Carlisle's words to the places on the map he'd referred to, like the Tygart Valley River, the Monongahela National Forest and the Allegheny Mountain. I'd get to see for myself just how amazing the views where in exactly six days from today, when we moved right on the edge of a small town called 'Mill Creek'. Population: 716, and counting. It sounded to me like the prime location of a 1970's horror film, so a guess a family of supernatural beings would be right at home. Our residence there was so far deemed to be 'indefinite', and Carlisle said the last time he'd visited was roughly 2-300 years ago. It would be 'just like Forks, but a lot smaller and with a little less rain', he'd said. In other words, it wouldn't be like Forks at all.

"Great." I'd said, in what had probably been the driest tone of all time. Carlisle had stressed how we all knew we'd have to leave Forks eventually, but that didn't mean I was happy or ready for that time to be now. "It all sounds… great. So I guess I should start packing then."

I think they all knew that I was struggling with the whole concept of leaving Forks for good, and in their own way, everyone had tried to be supportive over the chaotic days that followed as we organised the move. Alice took the time to tell me about Elkins, which was the main city of the county, and dad had chipped in to tell me we'd be just in time for the 'Heritage music festival' filled with sounds from Old Time, Blue Grass and Cajun to name but a few. Rosalie and Esme said they'd help me redecorate my room, and were planning to set up their own interior design business. Meanwhile, Jasper and Emmett were pretty 'stoked' about all the bears waiting to be wrestled with for dinner. Finally, mom had been biting her lip over the prospect of eventually studying at the liberal arts college in Elkins. All in all, there was something there for everyone. I was just yet to get excited over whatever was waiting there for me.

"Well, well… if it isn't Grandma Nessie."

The familiar, slightly gruff voice of my best friend suddenly cut through the bellowing 1930's chorus, and instantly tore my gaze away from the glare of my laptop screen. My door was wide open, which pretty much meant that I was happy for anyone to disturb me, so he hadn't bothered to knock. My gaze settled on him, trying not to greedily linger on the blue and white baseball t-shirt that hugged his innately muscular torso like a second skin. At around 6'5", Jacob cuts a pretty imposing figure. Even when he's oh-so-casually leaning against my doorframe, like he's done countless times before. I thought that as I grew taller, he'd stop being so huge. I'm now 5'11" tall but still waiting for the other part to happen.

If Rosalie was here, she'd no doubt be commenting on smelling his dog stench from a mile off. To me though, he smells… earthy; like redwood and pine and solid oak and… maple. He just permanently carries the scent of nature with him, along with the occasional musk that I liked to call 'man-smell', otherwise known as damp socks and sweaty armpits. I didn't mind though, and man-smell or no, so long as my mind was elsewhere, he could still occasionally sneak up on me like he just had.

Jacob doesn't just smell nice. He's like… the sunlight too. Seriously, I could already feel his comforting warmth reaching out to me. Then he flashed me his trademark, toothy grin, and I felt myself shudder. Not because I was cold – I'm never cold around Jacob. It's just, that expression of his, combined with his overall aura and being; it has the annoying power to disarm me at the worst of times; like when I should be retorting with something clever and witty, rather than gazing up at him in my blank stupor.

"You gonna let Nessie come outside and play, or you gonna sit in your rocking chair all evening?"

There was supposed to be a late summer storm brewing, which was the perfect excuse for Vampire baseball. It was also potentially the last game of baseball we'd be playing in Forks. As I glanced out the window though, all I saw were overcast skies in varying shades of grey. In other words, it was the usual Forks skyline with a chance of a summer monsoon.

"Are you sure there's a storm coming?" Smiling back at him, I folded my arms under my modest chest, which hadn't grown past a B cup. I often wished I could be a little more curvier but, at least I wasn't totally flat. "I think your wolf senses are acting up."

His smile broadened a notch. "Oh I can't wait for you to eat those words." Wrinkling his nose then at the bad odor of the music still droning on, he sighed as he pushed his upper body away from the doorway. I swear I heard the wooden frame creak slightly under the pressure of his weight. "But first -"

I watched him with a raised brow as he crossed the room and mercilessly lifted the pin off the spinning record. The song suddenly cut to silence, and Jacob breathed a forced sigh of relief. "Much better. Geez, how can you listen to those old folk droning on like that?"

"The same way you listen to heavy guitar solos and screaming men?" I answered with the slightest of knowing smirks. Jacob was hardly a 'screamo' fan, and rarely even listened to heavy metal even, but I'd caught him once and wasn't going to let him forget for another… well, ever.

"Hey, that was one -"

" – One time." I finished the sentence for him and with him, then released a little chortle. "Well I hadn't listened to that song in ages either." Pulling my knees up, I hugged them to my chest as I rocked back slightly. "But every time I do it … makes me think of grandma and grandpa, sitting outside on the porch at sunset and just, y'know… chillaxing."

In my head though, the fantasy playing out didn't star Carlisle and Esme in the 1930s, or any other family member for that matter. Right now, I was imaging Jacob and I, sitting out on the porch in say, a hundred year's time; like we would if we were elderly only, we wouldn't be. Not physically. We'd be young and back in Forks to unfreeze time since being forced to live elsewhere, because to me, life didn't really exist without Forks.

"Chillaxing?" The roll of my dream co-star's warm laughter filled every corner of the room, and abruptly pulled me out of my fantasy. I know I'm a hopeless romantic, just like my mother, but it wasn't that that bothered him. It was my choice of vocab. "H'oh boy. That – what was it called again? Tygarts Valley High? Yeah, they won't know what hit 'em."

I scrunched my nose at him, and he continued to softly chuckle to himself as he flopped down on the side of the bed. He already had the remote for the more up-to-date sound system in his hand, and wasted no time hitting the 'play' button.

"Okay, we'll work on your phrasing later, but unless you want to be tossed in the nearest dumpster on your first day, you seriously need to re-edit your playlist."

A more cheerful song started to blast through the speakers, with a much stronger beat and prominent bassline than the former.

I'm halfway to heaven, and I don't know;
If it's where I'm meant to go.

By 'first day,' Jake had been referring to my impending first day of high school, which everyone had finally agreed on after a whole year of bickering amongst themselves over whether or not I was ready to mingle with 'the worst kind' of human society; aka Teenagers. My counter argument was that I was already technically a teenager, even though I'd only been alive for six years, ten months and counting. In human years though, I figured that my current age translated to seventeen-going-on-eighteen. I should be working towards graduation already, not only just starting my academic life! Funnily enough though, ask me if I wanted to go to school six months ago and I would have begged my dad to enrol me. Right now though, finally going to high school was probably the last thing I wanted to think about.

"C'mon, they don't really throw people in dumpsters, do they?" I'd seen it happen in a bunch of teen-flicks; the whole 'jock meets alternative meets dumpster' scenario, but film versus real life doesn't always equate to the same result. Right?

Everybody's singing out of praise;
Dropping down their names in gold.

"Pretty sure Quil got dumpster tossed, and Seth too, but you didn't hear that from me."

"What!? That's terrible! Why would anyone want to -" And the next thought that crossed my mind, made my jaw drop. "Jacob… did you ever get dumpster tossed?"

"What, me?!" He practically scoffed. "No way!"

And I don't know where to go;
This house has changed so much since I grew.

I inhaled a sharp breath, and narrowed my eyes at him. "Then, did you ever toss someone else in a dumpster?"

He scoffed again. "Do I look like a dumpster tosser?"

Hah! Dumpster tosser…

I don't know what to do;
My heart is racing back and forth.

I had a put a hand to my mouth in a poor attempt to cover my snicker, courtesy of my time spent in London. Alice had taught me a lot of Cockney rhyming slang, and I'd picked up some newer British-isms too, many of which had made me giggle like a proper teenager leaning naughty words for the first time, and knowing exactly why they were so gosh-darn naughty.

I don't know who to love;
This house has changed so much since I grew.

"What's so funny?" Jacob, on the other hand, stared blankly at me. I realised then that the majority of time I spent with Alice usually involved shopping, and that was one form of torture Jake preferred to avoid like the plague.

"Oh – well, it's just that, in England, a tosser is erm… it's someone who erm – "

Oh geez, what had I just blindly walked into? I could already feel my cheeks start to burn; a trait I'd inherited from my mom. How was I going to tell him that a 'tosser' was… well, it was actually a pretty rude word and, come to think of it, it wasn't something I wanted to associate with Jacob at all. It definitely wasn't something I wanted to explain to him!

I don't know where to go;
My heart is racing back and forth.

Wow, in my silence, I noticed the song that was playing, and how it was suddenly really relatable. If only the song could just do the talking for me now, that would be great.

Cut bassline interlude.

Okay, guess not then.

Clearing my throat, I desperately thought to change the subject before any nasty thought crept into my mind anyway, which would inevitably lead to me blushing even more and –

"…Someone who…'what', Ness?"

My mouth gaped a fraction more, and I suddenly wish I had the power to freeze time or better yet, rewind time. Jake was staring at me expectantly and I just wished my bed would swallow me up whole. I could just tell him to google it, which he probably would anyway, if he remembered to. Wait, no! I don't want him to goggle it either, then he'd think I was really… dirty.

"It's… someone who –" Think, Nessie, think! Someone who does what?

I'm halfway to heaven and I don't know;
If it's where I'm meant to go.

Okay, so now this was song was the complete and total opposite of how I felt right now!

God, I'm so glad my dad isn't close enough to eavesdrop in on my thoughts at this very moment. Just the thought of that made my embarrass-o-meter climb to the next level. I felt like such an idi – OH!

"It's an idiot, basically. So you'd be a… dumpster… idiot."

The air is getting thinner and I'm the only one who's starting to choke.

Yeah, you can say that again, but phew! I think I was done choking, for now. Ok, so my translation wasn't quite as funny as what originally made me giggle, but it was true at least. Aunt Alice had called Edward a 'right tosser' once, when he'd made her really mad. She'd been calling him an idiot though, not the other thing. You've got to love words with dual meanings.

I couldn't relax yet though, because the quirk of Jake's brow was more or less his silent way of saying he didn't believe me a single iota, so I tensed up as I waited for what inevitably came next.

"Huh," and there it was; the huffed word that always followed the 'I don't believe you' look. "Well I guess you've gotta be an idiot to t- throw, anyone, in a dumpster."

I think my strained laugh was caught halfway between nervous and humiliated. "Yeah, my thoughts exactly." In other words Jake, can we please-please- please just change the subject now!?

I think – and hoped – that he got the hint, because his eyes dropped to my laptop, and he gestured with this jut of his chin towards it. "You checking out the new neighbourhood?"

Oh thank every single deity for that!

"Trying to," I sighed, then leaned forwards and dropped my knees back down to a Buddha cross. I stopped paying attention to the song lyrics as the repetitive tune faded into the background. It wasn't the first time that we'd chatted about the house move, and I no longer had the energy to keep up the false pretence of curt smiles and excitement, just so I could quickly change the subject altogether. I knew that none of it had washed with Jacob anyway. He'd been waiting for me to open up about it, in my own time. He never pushed or forced me to be honest with him, but he was always there whenever I was ready to talk. It was one of the things I lo- liked so much about him.

"There's plenty of information about Randolph County in general, but as for Mill Creek, I'm coming up short."

Turning the screen a fraction to the right so he could see it better, I let him take control of the mouse so he could click around the google map I currently had open. He scrolled through a few pictures and had the same, nose-scrunching reaction I did. "I can't believe Carlisle managed to find a miniature Forks-wannabe," he finally muttered

"I know right! It's grosse."

Even I didn't expect such a violent and let's face it – juvenile reaction to escape my lips, and in my peripherals, I could see Jake's brow furrowing into a more concerned frown as he looked to me. There were others words I could have used: outrageous, disgusting, obscene…

"I mean –" All I could do was sigh heavily and sag my shoulders. Guess the cat was out of the bag. "It's not home, and it doesn't feel like it ever will be. It's just… a replica; a false imitation that will never replace the real thing. Not in a million years."

"Ness…" He started, but then paused, maybe to reflect carefully on his words? He did that, sometimes, although most of the time he just said what he felt and dealt with the consequences afterwards. Jake is like a combination of fire and earth, whereas I guess I'm more like air and water?

Refusing to look at him both during and after my little outburst of raw honesty, I tilted the laptop to face me square on again, and just outright closed the web browser completely. My current desktop image was a photograph of the whole family, caught in varying stills from about a year ago. Mom, dad and Jake were with me in the forefront, striking the only forced 'pose' in the photo. Meanwhile, Rosalie and Emmett were playing chess on the porch, with Alice and Jasper sitting on the steps, just holding hands and talking. Finally, Esme was just coming outside from the sliding doors, holding a tray of freshly baked, double-chocolate chip and hazelnut cookies – Jake's favourite. I regretted that Carlisle wasn't there, well – not entirely. He had been behind the camera, but he'd also managed to catch the shadow of his pinky finger in this particular frame. It made the photo perfect in so many ways, but looking at it now was like a vicious stab to the chest, straight to my erratically beating heart. Without the view of the Olympic Forest behind us, we'd never be able to recreate this perfect scene.

"Nessie." I heard Jake's voice again, the tone firmer and more resolved this time. He had my attention straight away, but as soon as my eyes met his, my stomach sank. In all his chiefly wisdom, I knew that he was going to say something in an attempt to change my mind or convince me to think positively.

"Mill Creek might not be all that bad." And there it was. I pursed my lips tight to stop from spilling me erratic thoughts, and felt my front teeth pinch at my bottom lip as I willed myself to just listen. "Sure, it isn't Forks, and it never will be but, that's not necessarily a bad thing."

It wasn't what I wanted to hear, so I snapped my head to the other side, looking completely away from him. I could still hear him sigh though.

"Why didn't you say anything before? About how you felt – didn't Edward hear your thoughts even?"

"No," I curtly shot that down. "At least, I don't think so? I've been trying to … distract myself."

Jake's jaw tensed as he seemed to connect all the dots and realise why I'd been spending a lot more time upstairs in my room lately, and trying my hardest to keep myself preoccupied with other things. Like going on longer hunting trips and beach walks and just generally trying to get away from the house.

"I think he's caught a hint or two."

I couldn't argue with that since rarely anything seemed to escape my dad's attention, and my mom had her own way of figuring things out too.

"And he's probably just waiting for you to talk to him."

I couldn't argue with that either. I think everyone was waiting for me to come undone at the seams, but I must have inherited my dad's resolve and stubbornness on that account.

"So… why didn't you just say something - anything?"

Because, Jake, the answer would still be the same? Because Emmett was so excited by the prospect of bear-hunting and even Alice seemed content that it was 'the right choice' for the future? I settled on the rhetoric.

"Because we don't have a choice. If we stayed in Forks, Carlisle would still have to give up his job and then, it would only be a matter of time before word got around that we were still here, frozen in place." It was my turn to sigh, and then slap down the lid of my laptop screen altogether. I was tired of being taunted by the picture of my ideal life. "I know the reasons why we have to move Jake, but that doesn't mean that I like it. It doesn't mean that I want to go!"

I finally looked back at him, and saw that he was staring down, wearing his 'thinking' frown. His deep set, dark brown eyes of his were intently staring at the bed ahead of us, whilst his pout formed a tautly pulled, straight line. What cut me up most of all, was that no matter how much a part of the family he is, he also belonged to another family. So by coming with us to West Virginia, he'd be leaving both his pack and his dad and sisters behind. I wanted him to at least have the option to stay with them, but a horrible, completely selfish part of me, couldn't bear the thought of leaving him behind. I know it sounds corny, and maybe even a little bit over-dramatic and dare I say hormonal (?) but… I think if he stayed, it would be like, losing a major part of me. Just the thought of it made my chest ache and my eyes sting. I was already losing Forks. I couldn't lose Jacob too.

Suddenly, searing hot warmth found my right hand, and I looked down to see Jake's cinnamon hand resting on top of mine. "I don't want to go either," he admitted in a quieter voice.

Oh god… I felt my throat constrict, like a sinister hand was suddenly squeezing it right around the jugular. Lifting my gaze along what I knew to be a toned, russet arm, currently concealed by the long sleeves of a blue and white baseball shirt; I settled my eyes on his and felt hopelessly and completely lost. Not just for words, but for a concise and clear emotion. Everything was fuzzy and convoluted in my panic-accelerating mind. On one hand, I was so glad that he shared my opinion and yet, on the other… I dreaded to think what the 'other' meant.

Was Jake trying to tell me that he was having, or had had, second thoughts?

Was he going to choose the pack and his real family, over me?

No Jake, please. Blood isn't always thicker than water! Aren't I your family too!?

I think the past week of hiding behind a smiling face and not allowing myself to feel anything beyond a numb façade, had finally just caught up with me. I hadn't cried unhappy tears in… 2 years, maybe? My life had been filled with so much joy and happiness; you could even say that I was spoilt by it. But the thought of Jacob and I being separated, even if it was only by 2,852 miles and 42hours, that was enough to tip me over the edge. I knew the tears were coming, because I felt pinpricks in my eyes followed by the sting of my very own salt lake dam opening up. I held my breath, trying to stop it, but in no time at all, the first, lukewarm teardrop slid down my cheek.

I choked, quickly raising a hand to my mouth to stop retching any further on the raw emotion that was consuming me whole. God, I'm so pathetic right now. Please, don't look at me Jake.

"Ness, are you –"

And then, I'm suddenly engulfed by fire, and it's embers are every bit as soothing and selfless as Jacob is. He scoots over and pulls me towards him in one fell swoop, and his thick, strong arms pull me me oh-so tightly against his broad and warm chest. I'm forced to uncross my legs and just, tuck my knees to the side, whilst I lean my back against Jake's strong, supporting arm. If I just lifted my butt a bit, and moved a little to the right, I could easily be sitting on his lap. Instead, I feel the side of his thigh against my lower back, and that contact is more than enough. Gladly resting my head against his chest, I'm close enough to hear his heart thundering like a constant tribal drumbeat. It almost mimics the rhythm droplets of rain that have started to pat against the windowpane, signalling that a storm is indeed brewing. The storm is inconsequential though, because I have Jacob here to protect me against all the odds. Unless… he decides to stay. I'm stabbed by that sharp pain again, and all I can do is press my face completely against his chest in the hope that it muffles my whimper enough to escape his notice.

It doesn't.

"It's okay," his voice soothes. "I'm here."

Yes, you are, but for how much longer, Jake?

"I'll always be here. Just… let it all out."

I want to. I need to have a good cry, but I can't, and I won't. I have to be strong, and resolute, like a cold statue of ice and granite. I am half-vampire, after all. So I hold my breath again, and give in to the natural temptation to cling to him with arms thrown around his neck and forearms bent in a tight lock behind his head. You're not going anywhere Jacob! I won't let you.

His bent knee nudges more prominently against my hip as he reciprocates by hugging me tighter, and now would be the perfect moment for my latent, time-freezing ability to manifest itself. I would quite happily stay like this for as long as possible.

I'll always be here, he'd said.

"Do you promise?" I finally manage to form words, albeit more like mumbled sounds, and I feel the muscles in his arms tense. He's already told me a dozen times before that he'll always be there for me. That I can always talk to him, about anything, and he'll never judge me. He's already made promises, but I need to hear it again.

"Nessie…" Unlike mine, his voice is calm and centred. "Where you go, I go, remember?" I stayed perfectly still as he paused a beat, before saying the one word I needed to hear. "It's not just a promise. It's a fact."

In that moment, my uneven heartbeat was irrevocably set to calm down but, something else happened instead. It was an entirely unexpected curveball, in the form of something velvety but a little moist, lightly pressing against my hairline. When I felt a warm blast of Jake's breath against my skin, I realised then – it was his lips, his beautiful lips, pressed so tenderly against my forehead in a symbol of his totally irrevocable and… appropriately platonic love. Only, we hadn't hugged like this a solid six months, and all for a good reason which, I won't go into right now. The last time he'd held me like this though, it had been more reminiscent of a child being consoled by an older brother or cousin, or even a slightly older, best friend. When he hugged me now though, and kissed me, and made promises that I knew he'd always keep, my stomach started to flutter and my cheeks grew warm with the sensation of what felt like a dozen butterfly wings, flittering against the deepest, southern-most base of my gut. Just below the spot that warms when you feel really happy or excited or even nervous.

Loosening my hold on him, I slowly slid my arms off his shoulders, and resisted the really strong urge to hold only his biceps with my hands. I lightly laid them on his shoulders instead, so I could gently push him in the opposite direction as I slowly leaned back. He took the hint, loosening his hold on me, but kept his hands on my arms. I wanted to look up at him, but I didn't dare meet his gaze right now, so I ducked my head to the left, and stared down at my bed. My dad would probably self-combust if he could see us both now, embracing on my bed, of all places. That thought at least helped to curve the uneasiness in my stomach, but I think it would take a little longer for the sensation to disappear entirely, along with the urge to reciprocate that kiss with my own lips, pressed against his.

"I'm sorry," I finally said, trying my hardest to focus on filling the silence with an explanation. "I know I should have said something before, instead of bottling everything up, and – "

I still had some tears left to spill, but I refused to let him see me looking so pathetic and helpless, even though the guilt of selfishly making him promise to come with me, stung like a twisting knife in my conscience. I was a terrible person for making him promise like that, and I realised now that I couldn't feel completely good about what I'd just done. Steeling myself for the worst though, I finally looked up at him with teary, blurry eyes and all.

"I should be telling you to stay here, with your family and your pack and –"

"What? Nessie, no –" His hands sharply gripped my arms and I almost winced at the sudden pressure he placed against my skin. To make matter worse, he glared at me with wide-awake eyes, commanding my attention and silently demanding that I keep eye contact. I didn't dare refuse whatever power he had over me right now. I didn't dare look away.

"You don't need to offer me a choice, and even if you did, I know what I'd choose, over and over." His palms briefly moved down my arms a notch, like he was about to give me a good shake, but he settled instead for another, firm squeeze of my flesh. "You're my family, Nessie. I mean, I love my dad and my sisters, even if they are a pain in the ass sometimes. It sucks to have to leave them behind but, they don't need me here. They'll be fine."

All I could do was draw long, deep breaths into my lungs. Was Jake saying that… I needed him more? He wasn't wrong but, something inside me panicked at the sheer intensity of that statement. It was okay that I was aware of what I wanted and needed, but I didn't realise he was totally aware of it too. Was the feeling… mutual then? Did… did he need me?

Or did he just feel obliged to keep babysitting me until I was fully grown up and ready to face the world on my own two feet?

A reassuring smile lifted the corners of Jacob's lips; those same lips that had gently touched my forehead just seconds go. I studied his face in silence, tracing his high cheekbones and smooth skin with my eyes alone, and noting how relaxed he seemed with this whole conversation. There wasn't an ounce of regret or remorse as he explained his decision to me. It felt like, he was at peace with his choice.

"I know why we have to leave, and I don't like it either, but at least we're in this together." His jaw tightened then, and for the first time in what felt like ages, he abruptly looked away. "And you'll have Bella and Edward there too, not to mention blondie and log-head and pixie and… the other one."

"And grandpa and grandma," I added.

"And grandpa and grandma," he agreed. We both lightly smiled, until my smile transformed into a nervous little giggle, and he replied with a soft chuckle of his own. I finally dropped my hands from his shoulders, and likewise, he moved his hands from my arms. I frantically took the opportunity to tuck an amber curl behind my left ear, and he in turn raked his fingers through his raven black hair.

"Thanks, Jake." Huffing an embarrassed little breath, I frantically tried to dry my eyes with the sweep of my fingers. To my surprise, the rough pad of Jake's thumb touched my cheek, and his eyes studied me carefully as he wiped the salty wetness away with a gentle brush.

"Anytime, Nessie."

I clamped down on my lower lip and grazed my teeth across the skin. The moment before was lost and yet, here we were, still sitting close together; his thigh still resting against my lower back. Neither of us made any attempt to move as we just gazed at each other in placated silence, and I had to wonder; if the roll of thunder in the distance hadn't interrupted us, what would have happened next?

Unfortunately, I'll never know, because as soon as Jake's attention was stolen by the weather outside, he cleared his throat and dropped his hand. We both looked to the huge wall of a window, and then, I caught a victorious grin capturing his mouth.

"Correct me if I'm wrong but, isn't thunder a sure sign of a storm?"

Ugh… and we were back full circle. "N-No? Shut up, Jacob. I'm not eating my words."

He suddenly grabbed my laptop. "Okay, then let's google it."

"Jake!" I tried to grab my laptop back, but he jumped off the bed before I could snatch it from his strong grasp. I was fast too, but he remained one step ahead of me in this game. He already had the lid open when I was on my feet, and every attempt to reach around him was met by the smooth turn of his body to one side of the other.

"What are you so worried about?" He taunted with laughter in his voice. "It's not like google will tell us that thunder equals a storm, right?"

"Jaaaake!"

He outright barked a laugh again, and I could hear my laptop whirling to life as the web browser opened up. Quickly moving around my bed, Jake managed to type two words into google search, before I finally yanked the laptop off him.

"Okay already! You win. There's definitely a storm outside. You were right and I was wrong." I huffed a breath, and put my free hand on my hip. "Happy now?"

"Very," he beamed.

Just then, we both heard the front door suddenly slam, and Aunt Alice's voice carried up the stairs of the family home.

"It's time! C'mon you two, the storm won't last forever."

I exchanged glances with Jacob, but before he could make a swift escape from my room, he was blocked by the barricade that was a slightly perturbed, raven haired vampire. She may have only been 5'3" tall, but when she lacked in height, she made up for in her bubbly and larger than life persona. Alice just… breathes life and energy into everything she does, and everyone she touches with her kindness. Honestly, she's more of a sister to me than an aunt. Although, right now, as she looked me up and down, she was a shrieking sister.

"What?! You're not even dressed yet?"

Crap.

I forgot to mention; Alice may be heaps of fun, but getting on her bad side is never a wise move. Looking down at myself, I realised what she meant by 'dressed'. Both Alice and Jake were wearing their baseball t-shirts and sports clothes, whereas I was still in my casual jeans and simple vest. I could play baseball as I was in bare feet but, Alice would have a fit. She has a lot of unwritten rules when it comes to clothes, so when it came to playing baseball, we all had to play our part by wearing the appropriate uniform.

"Uh… I better leave you two to it." Jake once again tried to leave, but not before Alice had folded her arms against her equally modest chest, and glared up at him.

"Yes, you better run doggie, and don't think you're off the hook either. It's your fault she's not ready I hope you realise." Finally stepping aside, she made room for him to leave, but not before one final little verbal push. "Well? Go on then. And by the way, Emmett was looking for you."

"Gotcha." Right now, I think Jake would've ran to anyone if it meant escaping from Alice's wrath. I wish I could've ran with him, but instead, I was being pinned in place by my aunt's narrowing glare.

"Honestly, you two have all the time in the world to hang out, but he just has to distract you moments before our game's due to start." I stayed put, but followed her with my eyes and ears as she disappeared into my walk-in closet. "It's so rude and… inconvenient!"

I was terrible at keeping my closet all tidy and colour-coded, which is how I always knew whenever Alice had paid a visit; because everything would be arranged and neatly sorted. She'd already packed most of my clothes and shoes away for me, but she'd left a few of the basics for me; like my baseball kit. It didn't take her long at all to rummage in the drawer for it, and return to my room with a pair of sneaker in one hand, and clothes draped over her arm. I opened my mouth to try to shoulder the blame she'd automatically lodged at Jacob, but then I realised there was no point. She was a woman on a mission, and I didn't want to be the person to derail her.

"One minute," she announced, sternly. "Then I'll expect you downstairs and ready to go." She carefully laid out my clothes and put my sneakers down at the end of the bed. Then, contrary to her bossiness, she smiled in a 'knowing' way. I just wish I knew what it was she knew that we were supposed to be sharing right now.

"I suppose I'll have to escort you," she added. "Wouldn't want you getting lost on the way to our usual spot."

What on earth was she talking about? Why would I get lost? Taking advantage of the fact that I was obviously confused, she grinned and turned on her heel, moving to the door. "One minute, Nessie."

Then, hurricane Alice was gone from my room, just as abruptly as she'd arrived.

I didn't have time to start thinking about what had happened with Jacob just now, or try to savour the warm and fuzzy feelings he'd evoked inside me. Instead, I unzipped and unbuttoned my jeans, and pulled my vest up and over my head of bronze waves. I had baseball to play, which meant it was time to put my game face on.

And I don't know where to go;
This house has changed so much since I grew.
I don't know what to do;
My heart is racing back and forth.

I don't know who to love;
This house has changed so much since I grew.
I don't know where to go;
My heart is racing back and forth.

To be continued in Chapter Two: "Strike Three - You're Out!"