Mischief Managed

"I've got it!"

"Got what?" Ron muttered sleepily, wishing Harry would shut up so he could go back to the lovely massage he'd been dreaming about.

"Hermione's birthday present. It's perfect. Now wake up." Harry pushed Ron's arm off his chest and sat up leaning on the numerous pillows littering their bed. "I've been trying to come up with something really special for her for the last hour, and I think I've finally got it."

Ron groaned and snuggled closer, rewrapping his arm around Harry's torso.

"Come on, Ron. Wake up." Harry wiggled trying to dislodge the arm which was now holding him firmly in place. "She'll be twenty-four on Friday, and I want this to be a really special birthday for her. Her life's been pretty shitty lately."

"Nothing she hasn't brought on herself," he mumbled into Harry's side, his eyes still firmly closed.

"Ron! She's our best friend."

"Oh? Really?"

"Not this again," Harry huffed. "Honestly."

"Well you have to admit she took forever—"

"Yeah, yeah," Harry snapped and pushed away from him. "We've been through all this before so stop being a jerk about it. It took a lot of people a long time to come around—some still haven't—but Hermione did, and she supports us one hundred and fifty percent.

"You're just mad because she made you clean up after dinner last night," Harry finished in a huff.

"Hmm, maybe I am." Ron grunted as he rolled onto his back dragging the pillow over his head before he continued, "But I still say she's only playing nice because she needs a place to stay."

"That's not true and you know it," Harry said, taking the pillow and hitting Ron over the head with it. "I am not having this argument with you again. She wants us to be happy."

"And we are happy, happier than I'd ever expected." Ron lifted the pillow of his face and leaned over to kiss Harry's shoulder.

Harry smiled down at his best mate and now lover. "Yes we are." He kissed the top of Ron's head gently and smoothed down the ginger hair that was pointing in every direction. "That's why my idea is so perfect. You want to hear what it is?"

Ron groaned but nodded yes.

"The Mirror," Harry said. "The Mirror of Erised," he repeated looking entirely too pleased with himself.

Rolling onto his side Ron waited for Harry to elaborate. "And …" he prompted after a moment.

"Don't you see? When she looks into the Mirror, she'll see who she truly desires."

"And?"

"And then she'll be happy. As happy as we are." Harry beamed.

"Okay. I'm confused. She'll look in the mirror and she'll be happy. How exactly?"

"She'll see her true love."

"Hermione?" Ron rolled his eyes. "You're talking about Hermione Granger, bookworm extraordinaire? Honestly, Harry, all she'll probably see is a pile of books."

"Be nice, Ron, okay? She's not going to see books, I'm sure of it," Harry said with conviction. "Don't you see how she looks at us? How she watches your sister and Oliver when they visit? She wants this." He gestured between the two of them. "She wants to be in love. She just doesn't know how to go about it."

"Are you barmy? Hermione doesn't want love. She wants … she wants … Oh, hell, I don't know what she wants but it's not love! That woman's a cold fish. I should know," he mumbled the last bit under his breath and was immediately sorry he had.

Harry's lips pursed together slightly and he raised his eyebrows. "You should know? Give me a break," he said as he pushed off the duvet and made to get up.

Ron reached over and grabbed Harry's hand before he could leave the warmth of their bed. "Sorry," he said as he kissed Harry's palm.

"Let's say you're right," he continued quickly. "Maybe she does want love, but you can't guarantee that's what she'll see in that mirror. Doesn't it show you what you most desire at that moment? I saw myself as Head Boy, you saw your parents. Most likely she's just going to see herself with a great job or kicking Malfoy's arse. You know, something like that."

"Mmm, maybe." Harry settled back onto his nest of pillows and looked intently at Ron. "Did I ever tell you what I saw when I looked in the mirror last year during the anniversary celebration? I was wandering the halls reminiscing, and I turned a corner and there it was."

"No," Ron said. He frowned at Harry. "Why the hell didn't you tell me? I would have wanted to look into it, too."

"Why didn't I tell you? Well, because I saw … you," Harry said quietly.

Ron felt his heart leap at Harry's words. "Me?"

"Yes, you. And that's what I want for Hermione. The mirror made me realize I had to go after what I wanted, no matter what the consequence." This time Harry's smile made Ron's heart melt. "I was blessed. I got my true desire."

He leaned over and lightly kissed Harry's lips. "You did?" He kissed him again as Harry nodded. "I guess I have a lot to be grateful for to that mirror," he said softly, his lips pressed against Harry's.

"I don't think I would have ever taken the chance without seeing we could be possible first. I'd wanted you before but the mirror gave me the courage to try." Harry said then deepened the kiss Ron had started. For the next few minutes Hermione was completely forgotten.

Eventually Ron pulled away, though reluctantly. "Fine," he began a bit breathless. "I'll help. Granted, I don't think she's going to see her true love or some nonsense like that, but I'll help if this is what you want."

"I do, and it'll work. Trust me," Harry said and snuggled under Ron's arm.

"Okay. So what's the plan? You know she won't look willingly, don't you? She'll say the mirror is stupid Divination bullshit and refuse to have anything to do with it."

"We'll have Kreacher put it in her rooms before she gets up on Friday. Then she won't know what she's looking at."

"I don't know, Harry. That sounds dangerous. This is Hermione we're talking about."

"It'll be fine."

Ron arched an eyebrow at the back of Harry's head. "Say that would actually work, how are you going to find the mirror? It's hidden at Hogwarts, isn't it?"

"I've got that part figured out, too." Ron could feel Harry smile even if he couldn't see it.

"Fred," Harry stated plainly, as if it explained everything.

"Fred?"

"Yep. Fred's ghost. I'm sure we can get him to find the mirror for us—though probably for a price—and once he does, I'll ask Kreacher to Apparate it here and put it in her room. She'll look into it without knowing what it actually is, and then once she's done, we'll have Kreacher take it back. That way no one at Hogwarts will even know it's gone."

"Fred and Kreacher? You want to rely on Fred and Kreacher for help? With those two involved, something is bound to go horribly wrong. You know that don't you?"

"Oh, Ron, think positive." Harry squirmed out of Ron's embrace to face him. "You wait and see. This will be the best birthday present Hermione's ever had!"

And then Harry proceeded to make sure Ron forgot all about any qualms he may have had.

~~oOo~~

Hermione woke earlier than usual and skipped her newly required ritual of wasting an hour in bed wallowing in self-pity. It was a bad habit she'd fallen into over the last six months.

Today was her birthday. It was a day for fresh starts, and she'd promised herself that she was done feeling sorry for herself. Draco—fucking—Malfoy wasn't going to get the best of her! Who cares if he'd had her fired? Who cares if he'd had her blacklisted? That stupid job had been a dead end anyway. The memory of him running around as a scrawny white ferret for an afternoon was almost enough to make up for it all. He shouldn't have repetitively called her Mudblood, the stupid, immature asshole.

She glanced at the clock and silently thanked Harry once again for giving her the room with the en-suite bathroom. She had a full day ahead of her, and she didn't want to be late.

As she let the hot water run down her body, she thought about the last six months of her life. Unemployment was killing her. She'd spent a few months bewildered by the fact that doors were being slammed in her face before she'd realized just how far the Malfoy influence actually extended. Sure, she'd been offered a couple of jobs, but there was no way in hell she was going to be the Night Bus attendant no matter how desperate she got.

Harry had come through and offered her a place to stay right as her savings was almost depleted. Grimmauld Place wasn't the most ideal living arrangement for her right now, but it was better than being homeless. She might have been happier to be here with her two best friends, but when those two best friends were a couple, it was a nightmare. She loved them both, but Ron and Harry romantically involved was irritating at best. Who would have thought she'd be jealous of their relationship, but … she was. It really got under her skin how bloody happy they were together.

Yes, introspection had become her new best friend while living with Harry and Ron. She'd inspected and dissected every aspect or her life, trying to fit the pieces back in a way that made more sense. She'd made endless lists, read piles of self-help books, and finally crafted a plan. A good solid plan always helped to empower her.

And what better day to start plan implementation than her birthday?

She'd purposely scheduled meetings with two recruiting agencies for today, one Wizarding and one Muggle. Her plan was to get a job, despite Draco and his spiteful machinations, move out of Harry's house and away from the love-fest, and then—then she'd go about finding a partner of her own.

She rinsed the conditioner from her hair and turned off the water. Yes, she'd even made a rudimentary plan for finding love. She'd spent the better part of last week making a thorough list of personality and physical characteristics that she felt were important in a mate. After her job situation was rectified, she vowed to take her list of qualities and start looking in earnest. She knew she needed someone intelligent, a brilliant conversationalist—if she could manage—and someone with integrity and honor. She figured if she started haunting academic lectures and such, she might find someone that met enough of her criterion for her to take a chance on. If that didn't work out, she supposed she'd resort to a dating agency. If she trusted an agency enough to find her a job, why not a potential husband?

Wringing the excess water from her hair, she pulled aside the shower curtain to grab her towel.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" she screamed and tried desperately to cover her naked body with her hands. Twisting to look behind her, her feet slipped forward. Arms and legs flailing, she caught herself just before her knees hit the bottom of the tub. Horrified and confused, she peeked back up at the image in front of her.

The imposing man appearing in the mirror above the sink hadn't moved a muscle. He just stood there scowling. His eyebrows were furrowed together and his lips held an all-too-familiar sneer.

"What the hell?" Her head swiveled from side to side checking again that no one was behind her. Reassured that she was in fact alone in the shower, she made a grab for her towel only to find it just out of reach. To reach it she would have to stand and expose herself to the image in front of her.

Damn it! This was the last time she'd bathe without her wand within reach!

A long gilded mirror was fastened to the wall directly across from her. How it got there—and why she was seeing this particular man in it—was beyond her.

Of course the more pertinent question, however, was if she could see him … could he see her?

"Professor Snape?" she whispered, hoping against hope he wouldn't respond.

He didn't move a muscle.

"Professor," she said louder. Nothing.

"Professor?" she practically yelled this time. He continued to glower but made no other move or sign that he'd heard her. She relaxed minutely—so this didn't appear to be some sort of two-way communication device, after all.

But what was it? A practical joke? A Wheeze product?

That must be it. Ron and Harry were notorious for testing out Wheeze products on unsuspecting victims. Just last week they'd had her believing she'd somehow developed the power of telepathy. They'd spent a full hour saying random and embarrassing things without moving their mouths whilst they ignored each other. They had laughed long and hard at her apparent embarrassment to what she had thought was their inner dialogue. Ron's assessment of Harry's physical characteristics had been the worst!

So this must be a new line they were developing. Perhaps a product to frighten children into behaving better. She supposed it would be an effective measure to have such a realistic version of Professor Snape glaring down at you as you did your homework. Sort of like being in detention, really. She bet it uttered snide comments if you started goofing around too much.

Idiot boys! The bathroom hardly seemed the most suitable venue for such an item. Why would they put it in here? Shock value?

The cold was making her shiver, and if she didn't hurry, she was going to be late. So, the question was should she grab her towel and give the man a free show if for some reason he could actually see her, or should she rip down the shower curtain for cover?

Her dilemma was solved a moment later when Snape started moving around behind the frame, and she was able to take advantage of his turned back to grab her towel and yank the shower curtain closed behind her.

Once dry and covered, she escaped to the bedroom to get dressed. Retrieving her wand, she returned less than five minutes later to do away with the mirror. She'd thoroughly admonish the boys for this later. She was much too busy to be bothered with such adolescent foolishness today.

Quickly examining the object in front of her, she ignored the man who was now sitting in an overstuffed chair, sans cloak and jacket, reading what looked like a Muggle magazine.

Not that she was paying any attention to him, of course.

It was the mirror she was interested in, not the man. It looked ancient, and now that she was standing so close, she could feel the magic pulsing from it.

She had to give George credit, his craftsmanship was getting better every day, but why the hell put so much effort into a product like this? She just couldn't see this selling well.

She glanced up at the mirror's top and made out the words Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi faintly inscribed at the peak.

Okay.

So it wasn't something to frighten irresponsible children.

They'd made a replica of the Mirror of Erised. Whatever for?

Heart's desire?

Hermione pounded the sink in front of her. How dare they!

Wasn't her life horrid enough right now? She didn't need them making fun of the fact she was alone. Confiding in Harry that she was lonely had obviously been a mistake. Damn him.

They probably thought it hilarious showing her a vision of Professor Snape as her heart's desire. She'd always defended the man when Harry and Ron took to vilifying him in her presence. Ron especially had hated her loyalty and trust in the professor—so much in fact that he used to tease her about being in love with the dour man. Now they were using him to add insult to injury.

Great. Just great.

She looked at the glass as the professor raised his eyes from the magazine and smiled, really smiled at something in the distance.

She leaned in closer. He had a nice smile. He'd fixed his teeth—they were no longer crooked and stained—and his eyes lit up as if he were truly happy. He looked different. He was still a very slim man, but his cheeks weren't quite a sunken as they'd been the last time she'd seen him, and his hair was noticeably longer. He wore it pulled back away from his face in a style that showed off his jaw line and neck nicely.

Hermione stared at the mirror and was shocked to realize, as the professor turned his head, that even with his pronounced nose he had a very becoming profile.

Arghhh!

She was becoming entranced by a glamorized doppelganger! There must be a damn Fascination Charm on this thing.

She raised her wand, flicking it swiftly to the left and right, and said the words to vanish the mirror into oblivion. Who cared how long they'd worked on it. They should have known better than to test it on her.

"Evanesco."

The mirror didn't budge.

She flicked again, enunciating more clearly.

But the mirror remained in front of her. Not even a shimmer or blink to show the spell had some effect.

She jabbed and poked.

She tried every variation of Removing, Un-Sticking, Vanishing, and Destroying charms she could think of.

She tried to manually remove the mirror from the wall.

She yanked. She pulled.

Nothing worked.

Half an hour later she was frustrated, starving, in need of another shower and worst of all … late.

Those two weren't getting off easy for this stupid prank. Perhaps it was time to pull out Ginny's old Bat Bogey Hex!

~~oOo~~

She pushed open the kitchen door and found the boys exactly where she had expected them, sitting at the kitchen table, Ron's arm around Harry, reading the sports page of the iProphet/i together. Lovey-dovey as always!

"Hermione!" Harry jumped up excitedly and hurried over to her. "Happy birthday!" he said, wrapping his arms around her in a hug.

Ron stood, but hesitated. "Happy birthday, 'Mione," he wished from a safer distance.

"Happy birthday? I don't think frightening me to death is the proper way of wishing me a happy birthday. Do you?" She pushed out of Harry's arms and scowled at him.

"What?" Harry stuttered, confused. "What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? I nearly killed myself getting out of the shower this morning; that's what's wrong. Why the hell did you put that thing in the bathroom anyway? I'm pretty damn sure I would have suffered the full effect even if it had been in my bedroom," she said as sarcastically as she could.

Ron and Harry exchanged a look.

"Umm, the bathroom?" Ron asked tentatively.

"Yes!" she snapped. "I pulled open the bloody shower curtain and there it was. A huge fucking mirror! Didn't you hear me scream?"

"No, umm … we didn't. Sorry, Hermione. We would have checked on you if we had, honest. Are you okay?" Harry asked again.

"No, I'm not okay! It wasn't remotely funny and I could have seriously injured myself."

"Kreacher was just supposed to put it somewhere in your room, Hermione," Ron blurted out in their defense. "We didn't tell him to put it in the bathroom. Really, we never meant to scare you."

"Kreacher! You had Kreacher do this? You two seriously need to grow up!" she yelled and pulled out her wand.

"Calm down. Calm down. Put your wand away, we're sorry," Harry said holding up his hands in surrender.

"You'd better be! And that … that thing had better be gone before I get home," she yelled as she pointed her wand at Harry's chest. "It's stuck to the wall, and nothing I tried could remove it! I seriously cannot believe you two would do this to me. A practical joke—on my birthday—when you know I have interviews with the recruiters this morning. And such a hurtful prank on top of it!" She was close to tears but refused to let the boys see her like that.

"Hurtf— "

She caught Ron shooting Harry a reproachful look out of the corner of her eye as he interrupted him. "I made coffee," he said to her. "Want a cup?"

As Ron scooted past the two of them he turned and mouthed a quick 'I told you so' to Harry.

"I saw that," she called to Ron before turning back to glare at Harry.

"I'll make you a big breakfast," Harry began to ramble, his eyes wide. "All your favorites. You'll feel better after you've eaten. Oh, and we have presents for you. I was going to save them for the party tonight but you can open them now if you'd like."

"Food and presents work as an apology on Ron, not on me, Harry. Plus, I don't have time for breakfast now," she said exasperated and turned to follow Ron to the counter. "Like I said, I have an appointment in a few minutes, and I've wasted the last half hour trying to pull that stupid mirror off the wall. I thought I warned you both if you tried testing another Wheeze product on me again I'd hex your bits off."

She waved her wand threateningly at both of them once more before deciding to put it away; hexing them wouldn't do any good anyway. Instead she snatched the cup from Ron. "You know I really can't believe you'd make fun of me like that, Harry. A fake Mirror of Erised. Ha, ha, very funny. Just hilarious. Let's tease poor Hermione. You think I like—"

"Hermione," Harry interrupted and glanced at Ron before turning back to her, "first of all, we're not teasing you, and second, that mirror isn't a fake."

"What?" Her expression froze. She looked from Harry's serious face to Ron's and then back again. What were they saying? "Of course it's a fake. It's a poor and insensitive joke you've decided to play on me."

"No. No, Hermione," Ron said cautiously, shaking his head. "That mirror really is the Mirror of Erised, not a Wheeze product or any other. It's the real deal."

"It's real? That mirror's actually real?" she whispered incredulously, her head cocking to one side.

"Harry wanted to do something special for you for your birthday. He knows how … well, how crazy things have been for you. He thought if you could have something to look forward to, something to plan and strive for, you'd be happier."

"We thought the mirror …"

Hermione held up her hand.

"It's not a joke then?"

Harry shook his head no.

"So you're saying it just showed me my true desire? Just now. Upstairs? But I saw … I saw P—" Her hand shot to her mouth covering it before she blurted out the rest.

"Hermione, it's all right," Harry said. "You can tell us."

"Oh fuck!"

"Really it's okay, Hermione. It can't be that bad. Who'd you see?"

"It is that bad! What the hell!" She put her head in her hands and groaned with the realization that mirror had shown her Professor Snape as her true desire.

"Shit! Shit! Shit!"

Harry placed his hand on her back trying to comfort her, but she shrugged it off and backed away from him. "No! You know what? I absolutely refuse to believe this."

"But Hermione, the mirror doesn't lie. I'm sure it will work out. The mirror really knows what it's—"

"Just because the mirror supposedly shows me what I really desire does not mean it's obtainable, Harry. Didn't Dumbledore warn you about this? Did Ron ever make Head Boy? Did you ever get to spend time with your real family? And now, now, I have this knowledge with no way of making it possible." She let out a tiny scream of frustration.

"My life is already fucking complicated enough and now I have to deal with this, too."

"But, Hermione we were just trying to help."

"You two really know how to cock things up, don't you?" She started backing away from them toward the door. She needed to get out of there before she actually did start crying. "Just do me a favor, okay, don't try to help me anymore. I can mange my own life. Really. I can!" And with that she slipped out the back door.

~~oOo~~

Harry and Ron stood there for a moment staring at the door.

"I told you it wouldn't go over well."

"Shut it, Ron. Sure she's a little upset right now but she'll be fine. She just has to get used to the idea first, I suppose," Harry said thoughtfully as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

"I'm awfully curious to know who she saw though," he mumbled more to himself than Ron.

"A little upset?" Ron ranted. "I'm honestly surprised she left us standing. You better hope she calms down before tonight. It'd suck her not showing up to her own party. Or worse, have her show up and then hex us into the next decade." Ron snatched the cup from Harry and took a mouthful. "And what'd ya mean who? I'm telling you Hermione didn't see a who, she probably saw herself as Minister of Magic or some rot like that."

"No, it was definitely a who," Harry said. "I asked Kreacher for a couple of favors when I had him get the mirror from Hogwarts for me. Oh, and he said something about Fred wanting a favor, too. But he wouldn't tell me what it was."

"Awww," Ron moaned. "What'd the bloody hell did you get us into now?"

"Well, I had him place an extra spell on the mirror for us. A true love spell."

"You what?"

"Well it was your idea!" Harry snapped. "You're the one who said she wouldn't see iwho/i she desires but rather iwhat/i she desires. And by the way, thanks for throwing me under the bus there. i'Harry wanted to do something special for you, Hermione.'/i You bloody agreed to it."

"This was not my idea! And a true love spell really wasn't my idea!" Ron snapped back. "She's going to kill you. Kill us both for that matter. I hope Fred wants some company because we are both going to end up as ghosts!" He sank into the nearest chair. "You had Kreacher put a true love spell on it? Oh, fuck, Harry! We are so dead."

They glared at each other.

"Who do you think she saw?" Ron finally voiced the question they were both thinking after a few minutes.

"Don't know, and with that reaction I don't think she's going to tell us."

"You know, she almost let something slip. Started to say something with a P."

"Percy?"

"Percy? Oh, my God. Do you think that's who she saw?" Ron asked.

"I don't know, but who else can you think of that starts with a P? Pansy?"

They both giggled but shook their heads no.

"I bet you it is Percy," Ron said. "You know, I think they'd be perfect together."

"Yeah, they're a hell of a lot alike. But why was she was so upset about it? Percy's an all right kind of guy. A bit pompous, but Hermione could handle that."

"I don't know. Maybe she feels odd that he's my brother? Or, maybe it's because he's dating someone?"

"Could be. She did say it wasn't obtainable. But, if they're meant to be together …" Harry shrugged. "Do you think you could get him to come tonight?"

"I'm sure I could persuade him. I'll just need to make sure Annabeth is busy with something else."

"True," Harry said with a frown.

"I don't know, Harry," Ron said after a moment of thought. "Maybe we should just stay out of it. We've escaped Hermione's wrath this morning with our bits still intact. Why tempt fate?"

"No, no, don't worry. Just do your best to get Percy there tonight." Harry leaned over to kiss Ron's cheek. "This'll be a good thing, you'll see."

"You keep saying that, but somehow I don't know whether I should believe you or not."

A/N - This was written for dressagegrrl for the ss/hg exchange on livejournal. Thank you so much to her for the great prompt and thank you to my Beta, deemichelle and to my alpha reader, snapemylove. You guys are the best!