Emergency
By: Lauren Freeman
Disclaimer: The Sentinel and everything about it is not mine. 911 stories not mine either. I am not making any money off of this. Just getting the pleasure of entertaining a few fans.
Authors Note: The basis of these 911 stories is from the book: "What's the Number for 911?" By: Leland H. and Gregory III. Read some of my favorite 911 calls and then re-wrote them in a different way. I suggest you get the book it is really quite funny! There is another one out, which I have not bought yet, but it is next on my list. If I get a good response to this story I will write another one when I get the other book. :)
A/N 2: Names in caps are in their point of view.
Emergency
By: Lauren Freeman
BLAIR
Okay, so don't ask me how we got this job for the week, I still don't have a clue and no one is willing to explain. But I swear the people in this city are weird! Jim and I somehow got the assignment to help the 911 emergency services. We should not be here picking up the phone for every person who thinks they saw something in their house. We should be out there investigating what they thought they saw! But no...Hold on, got a call...
"911 Emergency."
"Yeah, listen...we just got a hotel room over at Annabelle's Hotel in East Cascade, and there are five of us up in this small room."
"Yes, sir, what's seems to be the problem?"
"Well, there is only three towels here!"
"Sir, you do know that this is 911 right?"
"Yes you told me that at the beginning of this call, what should I do about this problem?"
"Well have you tried calling the hotel's front office?"
"Do you think I should?"
"Yes sir."
"Well okay, thank you sir."
"Your welcome sir."
I rolled my eyes as I hung up the phone. Jim was cracking up laughing on the other side of the room starring at me. Oh, this was going to be a long week.
JIM
Sandburg just got a good one. I love this duty, gives me a chance to make others do the investigating. As a matter of fact, I get to choose whom I'm going to make investigate! So I usually have a few more enemies after this duty is over, but hey, it's well worth it. I don't think Sandburg likes this duty too much, I didn't either when I first started. Oh, time to get to work.
"911 Emergency."
"There is a wild animal in my house!"
"What kind of wild animal?"
"A mouse! AHHH! It just came out again. It's waiting to attack me, I have been sitting on my counter for an hour waiting for it to leave, but it never stays gone!"
"Excuse me ma'am, did you say a...mouse?" Blair snaps his head up and looks at me with a smile. I wink at him and get back to my conversation.
"Yes! You need to be listening the first time! Please send someone over here to help me!"
"Okay, okay ma'am, just calm down. I will send a police officer over there to help you get out of the house, then it will be up to you to call Rodent Killers to come take care of your...mouse problem." I am not going to laugh out loud. I am not going to laugh out loud.
"Okay, I'll be waiting, umm tell them to come in the back door, it...it's unlocked."
"Will do ma'am. Will you be alright until the police show?"
"Yes, sir, thank you!"
"Your welcome ma'am." We hung up and I dispatched the unit I liked least to the scene. Mwahahaha! Oh, Blair has another call.
BLAIR
Oh not another one!
"911 Emergency."
"Do you deliver Golden? My friends and I, well were about to run out and we need some more Golden man."
"Uh, sir, do you know that the 911 service is for emergencies only and is being ran by cops right now?"
A click and a dial tone answered me. I smile as I trace their call and send a unit to go have a look around. I wink at Jim but was not able to say anything because Jim has another call. Maybe this isn't to bad, I'm kind of having a lot of fun here.
JIM
This sucks, in the last two days we have had over 200 calls and only 50 have been real emergencies. What is it, stupid week? Okay, so a lot of the calls have been quite entertaining, but still, come one people! Oh here we go again.
"911 Emergency."
"Sir, can you send a nice young police officer to come change my smoke detectors batteries, I just can't seem to reach it."
"Ma'am, this number is for emergencies only."
"Sir, what if there is a fire, I could burn to death, I will have no warning!"
"I will send someone right now. Can you give me your address?"
"Sure honey..." She gave me her address and we hung up. I then dispatched Jeanne, the only women officer patrolling that day. Haha, I am so mean.
BLAIR
"911 Emergency"
"Yeah, I need to order a large cheese pizza, and a small order of bread sticks, and make it quick."
"Sir, this is 911, try 411."
"Oh, thank for nothing, dude."
"Your welcome." We hung up. Okay, I am not going to scream. I am not going to scream. Surly this is not normal, is it? I mean sure you have your occasional weird calls, but, almost all of them...come on!
JIM
Oh, I swear if this is not an emergency...only two more days to go.
"911 Emergency."
"Someone trespassed on to my property!"
"Was anything broken or stolen?"
"No, but they mowed my lawn. Only I mow my lawn, I think it was my neighbor, she's one mean lady."
That call just went on and on, she had a lot to say about a neighbor I wouldn't mind having. Oh wait here comes another one.
"911 Emergency."
"Okay, so I don't have an emergency, but what should I do about by daughter, she keeps bothering me!"
"Ma'am this is a line for emergencies only."
"Yes sir, please, could you just help?"
"Why don't you call the parents hot-line, they can give you some answers. The number is 959-8162. In the future we ask you to leave this line open for emergencies."
"Oh, okay...thank you."
"Your welcome ma'am."
BLAIR
Thank God this is our last day! I am going to be having a LOOOOONNNNNGGGGG talk with Simon after this is over. Then were going to have to make a public service announcement telling these people when and why they should call 911. This is just unbelievable! Okay, let's see what we have now. I'm really not in the mood for this today.
"911 Emergency."
"I know what you did."
"Excuse me?"
I know what everyone did, I know who you are and I know everything about you."
"Sir, do you have an emergency?"
"I have reported you to the FBI, you'll go away forever for what you did."
"I'm sorry, I don't know what your talking about, now do you have an emergency?"
"You've been warned."
"Look...hello? He hung up. I sent a unit out to his location. Jim gave me a worried look, but the phones have been ringing off the hook and I already have another call, and so does he.
"911 Emergency."
"Look sunny, I'm trying to reach nine-eleven, but I can't find it anywhere on my telephone, can you help me?"
"Ma'am, this is nine-eleven."
"Sunny, don't play games with me, I'm not stupid, you just said this was 911."
And that's how the day started off for me!
JIM
Sandburg has it rough, so far all I have had was a roach in a ladies ear, and a real emergency, in witch someone was having an MI. Wait, I may have spoke to soon.
"911 Emergency."
"Hello, is this a real person, or a recording?"
"This is a real person."
"No, you see you sound like a recording, let me talk to a real person, recording."
"I am a real person!"
"No your not, look I have a serious emergency, and I want to talk to a real person."
"Ohkaaay, hold on."
"Hey, you have an emergency?" I said in a lower voice.
"Thank you! Yes..."
And my next call went something like this.
"911 Emergency."
"This is SO freaking freaky!!!"
"Excuse me? Do you have an emergency?"
"Yes! I just got a Oujia board yesterday, I played with it last night and when I woke up this morning there was writing all over my wall! I...I think it's in blood! Send some one over...quick, make the board go away, cause I'm not touching it ever again!"
BLAIR
The day is almost over, just four more hours to go!
"911 Emergency."
"Oh good, I got through! I've got to tell you, it's been one bad day! Have you ever had a bad day? Never mind that question, of course you have, everyone has right? Anyways, it's my daughters birthday tomorrow so I asked my boss to let me off early, of course this is after I ripped my hose, tripped and now have a big old bruise on my face. Oh and I've had stomach acid all day, and everyone has ran out of Tums, figures right? Well, my boss tells me no...about the leaving early. Which of course only makes me angry. But of course I don't say anything cause I really can't get fired. The rest of the house is unemployed. Go figure! So I finally get off work, and the traffic! I swear, they decide to do construction at the worst times you know? I think they should only be aloud to work at night? Right? So I get too the mall three hours after work ended, a trip that is a normal 10 minutes drive. But hey that's just par for the course. Oh you know you've had those days we have been through this. SO I'm at the mall, and my gosh...Grand Central Station has had lass people then this when it is at it's peak compactly! You know? I get the presents for my daughter; teach me to shop last minute, but her taste change from day to day. One day she want this, one-day she want that...do you have kids? Of course you do, everyone has kids. Anyways so I get back on to the road, and am almost home, when my, oh so great luck kicks in and a gust of wind just pushes my car right off the road. So now I am stuck down here, and need someone to come help me out."
"Uh...umm...where is your location?"
My gosh, she totally broke my record for talking without taking a breath. I send someone out to help her, then hang up before she gets the chance to find something else to talk about. Jim is cracking up in the background. He will pay. Oh good another call for me. Why isn't Jim's phone ringing?
"911 Emergency."
"Uh, I need help with my Algebra homework!"
"Son, this is a line for emergencies."
"Duh! That's why I called! This IS an emergency! It's due tomorrow!"
"Here is a phone number that will help you with your school work." I gave him the number, and quickly reminded him of what a real emergency is.
JIM
Blair got a motor mouth! That was great! My phone has been surprisingly silent for the last couple of minutes, all calls seem to be diverting to Blair. That's all right with me I could use the break. Wait, No! I have got to learn to keep my mouth shut.
"911 Emergency."
I was greeted with a scared whisper. "Help me! There is someone in my house! Please...help me!"
"Ma'am, where are you?"
"I'm under my bed with my cordless, please have you sent someone yet?"
"Yes ma'am we have they should be there any minute now."
"Oh please make them hurry he's coming into my room, shhh...Andy? Andy, oh thank God! Excuse me, please cancel the police it's only my husband." I rolled my eyes as I hung up the phone. Hmm I wonder what kind of call Blair has...no not my line again!
"911 Emergency."
"Help! Help! My baby's been shot! My baby's been shot!"
"Calm down ma'am, the paramedics are on their way! Now how old is the baby?"
"Oh, ah...30!"
"30 months?"
"What? No, no! 30 years old!" Oh, I hate this night already.
BLAIR
Only one more call and my shift is over! HEHE! Jim is sitting beside me, having already given up his position to his replacement.
"911 Emergency."
"Umm, yeah, my friend just put his new gun into his pants and it went off and shot him!"
"Okay, have your friend lay down on the ground. Place a towel over the wound and put pressure on it. You don't want him to lose too much blood before the paramedics get to him. Where is the gun now?"
"Umm, I just put it in my pant's." BANG I jumped a mile into the air, startling Jim away from the talk he was having with my replacement. "Sh**! It just went off, my foot! My foot!"
Put the gun on the floor and shove it away. Don't touch it again! Take your shirt off and place pressure on your foot, yes it's going to hurt."
"What about Andy?"
"Is he conscious?"
"Y-yes."
"Have him hold the pressure on his own wound."
"O-okay, it hurts...the ambulance is here."
And that was my last call. Boy I seriously hope I never get this duty EVER again! Some people love this job, but it's not for me man...not for me.
By: Lauren Freeman
Disclaimer: The Sentinel and everything about it is not mine. 911 stories not mine either. I am not making any money off of this. Just getting the pleasure of entertaining a few fans.
Authors Note: The basis of these 911 stories is from the book: "What's the Number for 911?" By: Leland H. and Gregory III. Read some of my favorite 911 calls and then re-wrote them in a different way. I suggest you get the book it is really quite funny! There is another one out, which I have not bought yet, but it is next on my list. If I get a good response to this story I will write another one when I get the other book. :)
A/N 2: Names in caps are in their point of view.
Emergency
By: Lauren Freeman
BLAIR
Okay, so don't ask me how we got this job for the week, I still don't have a clue and no one is willing to explain. But I swear the people in this city are weird! Jim and I somehow got the assignment to help the 911 emergency services. We should not be here picking up the phone for every person who thinks they saw something in their house. We should be out there investigating what they thought they saw! But no...Hold on, got a call...
"911 Emergency."
"Yeah, listen...we just got a hotel room over at Annabelle's Hotel in East Cascade, and there are five of us up in this small room."
"Yes, sir, what's seems to be the problem?"
"Well, there is only three towels here!"
"Sir, you do know that this is 911 right?"
"Yes you told me that at the beginning of this call, what should I do about this problem?"
"Well have you tried calling the hotel's front office?"
"Do you think I should?"
"Yes sir."
"Well okay, thank you sir."
"Your welcome sir."
I rolled my eyes as I hung up the phone. Jim was cracking up laughing on the other side of the room starring at me. Oh, this was going to be a long week.
JIM
Sandburg just got a good one. I love this duty, gives me a chance to make others do the investigating. As a matter of fact, I get to choose whom I'm going to make investigate! So I usually have a few more enemies after this duty is over, but hey, it's well worth it. I don't think Sandburg likes this duty too much, I didn't either when I first started. Oh, time to get to work.
"911 Emergency."
"There is a wild animal in my house!"
"What kind of wild animal?"
"A mouse! AHHH! It just came out again. It's waiting to attack me, I have been sitting on my counter for an hour waiting for it to leave, but it never stays gone!"
"Excuse me ma'am, did you say a...mouse?" Blair snaps his head up and looks at me with a smile. I wink at him and get back to my conversation.
"Yes! You need to be listening the first time! Please send someone over here to help me!"
"Okay, okay ma'am, just calm down. I will send a police officer over there to help you get out of the house, then it will be up to you to call Rodent Killers to come take care of your...mouse problem." I am not going to laugh out loud. I am not going to laugh out loud.
"Okay, I'll be waiting, umm tell them to come in the back door, it...it's unlocked."
"Will do ma'am. Will you be alright until the police show?"
"Yes, sir, thank you!"
"Your welcome ma'am." We hung up and I dispatched the unit I liked least to the scene. Mwahahaha! Oh, Blair has another call.
BLAIR
Oh not another one!
"911 Emergency."
"Do you deliver Golden? My friends and I, well were about to run out and we need some more Golden man."
"Uh, sir, do you know that the 911 service is for emergencies only and is being ran by cops right now?"
A click and a dial tone answered me. I smile as I trace their call and send a unit to go have a look around. I wink at Jim but was not able to say anything because Jim has another call. Maybe this isn't to bad, I'm kind of having a lot of fun here.
JIM
This sucks, in the last two days we have had over 200 calls and only 50 have been real emergencies. What is it, stupid week? Okay, so a lot of the calls have been quite entertaining, but still, come one people! Oh here we go again.
"911 Emergency."
"Sir, can you send a nice young police officer to come change my smoke detectors batteries, I just can't seem to reach it."
"Ma'am, this number is for emergencies only."
"Sir, what if there is a fire, I could burn to death, I will have no warning!"
"I will send someone right now. Can you give me your address?"
"Sure honey..." She gave me her address and we hung up. I then dispatched Jeanne, the only women officer patrolling that day. Haha, I am so mean.
BLAIR
"911 Emergency"
"Yeah, I need to order a large cheese pizza, and a small order of bread sticks, and make it quick."
"Sir, this is 911, try 411."
"Oh, thank for nothing, dude."
"Your welcome." We hung up. Okay, I am not going to scream. I am not going to scream. Surly this is not normal, is it? I mean sure you have your occasional weird calls, but, almost all of them...come on!
JIM
Oh, I swear if this is not an emergency...only two more days to go.
"911 Emergency."
"Someone trespassed on to my property!"
"Was anything broken or stolen?"
"No, but they mowed my lawn. Only I mow my lawn, I think it was my neighbor, she's one mean lady."
That call just went on and on, she had a lot to say about a neighbor I wouldn't mind having. Oh wait here comes another one.
"911 Emergency."
"Okay, so I don't have an emergency, but what should I do about by daughter, she keeps bothering me!"
"Ma'am this is a line for emergencies only."
"Yes sir, please, could you just help?"
"Why don't you call the parents hot-line, they can give you some answers. The number is 959-8162. In the future we ask you to leave this line open for emergencies."
"Oh, okay...thank you."
"Your welcome ma'am."
BLAIR
Thank God this is our last day! I am going to be having a LOOOOONNNNNGGGGG talk with Simon after this is over. Then were going to have to make a public service announcement telling these people when and why they should call 911. This is just unbelievable! Okay, let's see what we have now. I'm really not in the mood for this today.
"911 Emergency."
"I know what you did."
"Excuse me?"
I know what everyone did, I know who you are and I know everything about you."
"Sir, do you have an emergency?"
"I have reported you to the FBI, you'll go away forever for what you did."
"I'm sorry, I don't know what your talking about, now do you have an emergency?"
"You've been warned."
"Look...hello? He hung up. I sent a unit out to his location. Jim gave me a worried look, but the phones have been ringing off the hook and I already have another call, and so does he.
"911 Emergency."
"Look sunny, I'm trying to reach nine-eleven, but I can't find it anywhere on my telephone, can you help me?"
"Ma'am, this is nine-eleven."
"Sunny, don't play games with me, I'm not stupid, you just said this was 911."
And that's how the day started off for me!
JIM
Sandburg has it rough, so far all I have had was a roach in a ladies ear, and a real emergency, in witch someone was having an MI. Wait, I may have spoke to soon.
"911 Emergency."
"Hello, is this a real person, or a recording?"
"This is a real person."
"No, you see you sound like a recording, let me talk to a real person, recording."
"I am a real person!"
"No your not, look I have a serious emergency, and I want to talk to a real person."
"Ohkaaay, hold on."
"Hey, you have an emergency?" I said in a lower voice.
"Thank you! Yes..."
And my next call went something like this.
"911 Emergency."
"This is SO freaking freaky!!!"
"Excuse me? Do you have an emergency?"
"Yes! I just got a Oujia board yesterday, I played with it last night and when I woke up this morning there was writing all over my wall! I...I think it's in blood! Send some one over...quick, make the board go away, cause I'm not touching it ever again!"
BLAIR
The day is almost over, just four more hours to go!
"911 Emergency."
"Oh good, I got through! I've got to tell you, it's been one bad day! Have you ever had a bad day? Never mind that question, of course you have, everyone has right? Anyways, it's my daughters birthday tomorrow so I asked my boss to let me off early, of course this is after I ripped my hose, tripped and now have a big old bruise on my face. Oh and I've had stomach acid all day, and everyone has ran out of Tums, figures right? Well, my boss tells me no...about the leaving early. Which of course only makes me angry. But of course I don't say anything cause I really can't get fired. The rest of the house is unemployed. Go figure! So I finally get off work, and the traffic! I swear, they decide to do construction at the worst times you know? I think they should only be aloud to work at night? Right? So I get too the mall three hours after work ended, a trip that is a normal 10 minutes drive. But hey that's just par for the course. Oh you know you've had those days we have been through this. SO I'm at the mall, and my gosh...Grand Central Station has had lass people then this when it is at it's peak compactly! You know? I get the presents for my daughter; teach me to shop last minute, but her taste change from day to day. One day she want this, one-day she want that...do you have kids? Of course you do, everyone has kids. Anyways so I get back on to the road, and am almost home, when my, oh so great luck kicks in and a gust of wind just pushes my car right off the road. So now I am stuck down here, and need someone to come help me out."
"Uh...umm...where is your location?"
My gosh, she totally broke my record for talking without taking a breath. I send someone out to help her, then hang up before she gets the chance to find something else to talk about. Jim is cracking up in the background. He will pay. Oh good another call for me. Why isn't Jim's phone ringing?
"911 Emergency."
"Uh, I need help with my Algebra homework!"
"Son, this is a line for emergencies."
"Duh! That's why I called! This IS an emergency! It's due tomorrow!"
"Here is a phone number that will help you with your school work." I gave him the number, and quickly reminded him of what a real emergency is.
JIM
Blair got a motor mouth! That was great! My phone has been surprisingly silent for the last couple of minutes, all calls seem to be diverting to Blair. That's all right with me I could use the break. Wait, No! I have got to learn to keep my mouth shut.
"911 Emergency."
I was greeted with a scared whisper. "Help me! There is someone in my house! Please...help me!"
"Ma'am, where are you?"
"I'm under my bed with my cordless, please have you sent someone yet?"
"Yes ma'am we have they should be there any minute now."
"Oh please make them hurry he's coming into my room, shhh...Andy? Andy, oh thank God! Excuse me, please cancel the police it's only my husband." I rolled my eyes as I hung up the phone. Hmm I wonder what kind of call Blair has...no not my line again!
"911 Emergency."
"Help! Help! My baby's been shot! My baby's been shot!"
"Calm down ma'am, the paramedics are on their way! Now how old is the baby?"
"Oh, ah...30!"
"30 months?"
"What? No, no! 30 years old!" Oh, I hate this night already.
BLAIR
Only one more call and my shift is over! HEHE! Jim is sitting beside me, having already given up his position to his replacement.
"911 Emergency."
"Umm, yeah, my friend just put his new gun into his pants and it went off and shot him!"
"Okay, have your friend lay down on the ground. Place a towel over the wound and put pressure on it. You don't want him to lose too much blood before the paramedics get to him. Where is the gun now?"
"Umm, I just put it in my pant's." BANG I jumped a mile into the air, startling Jim away from the talk he was having with my replacement. "Sh**! It just went off, my foot! My foot!"
Put the gun on the floor and shove it away. Don't touch it again! Take your shirt off and place pressure on your foot, yes it's going to hurt."
"What about Andy?"
"Is he conscious?"
"Y-yes."
"Have him hold the pressure on his own wound."
"O-okay, it hurts...the ambulance is here."
And that was my last call. Boy I seriously hope I never get this duty EVER again! Some people love this job, but it's not for me man...not for me.