(1)
Today, one year had past since the beginning of this entire revolution madness. Paris still the same like it was last July, the blood shower hadn't stop, they are increasing day after day, every one is equal now, it doesn't mater anymore if you were a noble or commoner, if the crowd caught you won't survive! A lot of souls had gone so easily. This is not our revolution, not what we had planed for! We didn't plan for all this madness! All what we wanted was freedom, equality and human rights. God made us equal, some people forgot that and we wanted to remind them. But killing innocents wasn't involved in the main plan. And now every thing became out of control, the hunger made people crazy, they tasted blood for ones and now they became addicted on it.
For me, things are different, my life changed, and my only wish, my only dream in this life made its way to the reality. By destroying the layers of the society, I was finally free to love and able to marry the only woman whom I laid my on, the one whom I love, my dear wife, Oscar. She was my dear friend, my leader and my lady. NO, she wasn't my lady, even thought the truth was that \I was her servant, she never treated me as one, I was her friend, and I was just her Andrei. And now in the midst of the storm and in our small apartment in Paris, we are waiting for the birth of our first chilled with the first falling laves this year.
''Andrei! Are you writing again? In the darkness!'' She said that while closing the door after entering the apartment.
''Oh… Oscar!'' He didn't expect her present too soon.
''Why don't you try to be little merciful agents your eye'' It was clear to him now that she was upset. He knew that she censured about him, and she was right about it, his vision is becoming worse, but what can he do? He is trying his best to at least keep it as it is, but he can keep his feather away of his hand.
''Don't worry about me and my eye, we would be just fine! Tell me, how was your meeting with Robespierre?'' now by saying that he was trying to change the subject and fast as he could, he lied his notebook in the paper box and stands up leaving his seat to help her taking her coat off. He always did that, he loved to do it, what ever he was doing, he would put it side down and run to help her. And so he did. He took it off of her and hangs it behind the door. While he was doing that, she was trying to set on the couch in the middle of the setting room. It is not a hard work to do of course, or it wasn't hard for her five months ago, thanks to her still growing belly. For her it was obvious that it will keep growing like that for ever! It makes every thing hard to do, even the smallest everyday tasks that anyone would do without thinking how they would do it; she founds her self asking help day after day at doing those simple tasks. At the end she was able to set and lay her back on the back of the couch.
''None'' she said looking so tired ''Nothing at all, as usual, he wants as to be more serious about our decisions, of course he meant by that killing more people!'' she continued.
'' Don't give him any attention, just ignore him''. ''If he wanted to kill more people let him do it by himself! Also if he wanted us to follow him he has to be open about his moves, Bernard also knows that but he wont admit it himself, he just keeps covering the back of Robespierre telling us nothing about the real reason behind most of his actions''.
''Andrei, I can't understand anything anymore, I don't know what is right and what is wrong any longer, I have got tired of everything! I have got sick of this bloody revolution; this is not what I wanted to happen, all I wanted that to be sure that our child would live in a better world, where everyone is equal, and that is it! Nothing else'' by saying that a few tears found there way to run down her redden cheeks- mostly from the heat of the summer and her nerves.
''Oscar!'' the scene of her tears hurts; he felt his heart would break if she kept crying. He just moved closer to her and swept those tears by his finger tip, he did it so lightly almost without touching her skin, after that he kissed her on the forehead, like a farther trying to calm his daughter. She subbed one more time and that's was it.
''Oscar, please stop, can't you see that you are hurting yourself? I can't bear watching you suffering like that'' she couldn't look straight at his eyes; she knew what he was going to say next. He laid his head on her belly following his already there hand, as trying to hear something. '' He will grow up to be free as his parents'' he continued. She automatically stroked his hair at his action.'' Please Oscar, I want you to quit working for him, I want you to leave everything behind you and come with me to America, there we will be able to start a new life raising our son away of all this bloody madness'' and he raised his head to look at her in the eye, he was serious about it.
''And do you think that I am going to leave our France like that? Did you forget that we grew up here? This is our France, I was born here and here where I am planning to die in! We started this and we are going to put an end for it''.
'' We didn't start this! We fought with the people, we stormed the Bastille, the royal family is over now, our fight is over, and it is not our battle anymore. Please think of it, I am not asking you to run, the only thing that I am asking you is to live in peace away from this endless war''. He said his last words almost shouting. Her eyes opened widely, was he shouting at her?
'' Really? Do you think that I would…'' they would fight now but she couldn't' finish her words because of the lowed knocking on their apartment door.
'' Andrei, Oscar, are you there? It is me Rosalie'' her voice was argent. Andrei got up to open the door, to find that Rosalie was standing on the door, her face was pale and it looked as if she was frightened to death.
''Oscar… Madam Oscar… I … I am sorry!'' She started to cry. Every one was shocked by her tears, Andrei decided to do something, so he asked her to get into the house, as she entered she fall down at Oscar's feet. Oscar was surprised she tried to make her stand on her feet and set next to her.
'' Rosalie, what is it? Is there something wrong with Bernard?'' She said that while calming her by holding her hands.
''Madam Oscar, I don't know what to say, I tried to stop them but…'' and she cried. With an eye glance, Andrei was at the kitchen getting something for Rosalie to drink as Oscar ordered.
'' Rosalie, listen to me, Look at my eyes and tell me what happened''.
'' Last night, Bernard came late to tell me that they had planed to storm the… the mansion of the De Jarjayes''. She sobbed.'' And I tried to make him do something about it, but he wasn't listening to me, I wanted to tell you at the moment he told me, but he made me swear that I would not tell you what ever happened, and he will try his best, but now…he came back to tell me that they had already stormed the mansion and they caught your father'' now her lips were shaking even more.'' It is my fault, I had to tell you from the moment I heard about it, and now they caught him and it is all because of me!''
At her own words, Rosalie was crying on Oscar's lap. The other woman was unable to say a word, but she spoke at the end.
'' Rosalie, stop crying please'' That wasn't what she wanted to say, wasn't what she really felt. It wasn't simple for her; it was horrible as a bad nightmare! Andrei who was holding a glass in his hand before it fall on the wooden floor, was holding his coat in his hands before Oscar stops him. ''Where are you going?''
'' I have something to discuss with Bernard'' and he started to ware the coat.
'' And what do you think he would do, Andrei? Nothing is in his hands, Robespierre is controlling him now!'' her tone was so cold, she say it as if she didn't believe what was happening.
''Please Andrei, I feel so shame, I know he doesn't deserve any protection but, please don't blame him, I would do any thing …''
'' It is alright, nothing will happen, Andrei please take off your coat'' she was feeling abet dazed now.
''Oscar, are you alright?'' he was able to see that she turned pale. ''Madam Oscar!''
''Andrei, Rosalie, I am fine only that I feel…'' And she faint.
When she opened her eyes, she found that she was in the bedroom, lying on the bed by Andrei setting on chair next to the bed.
''Andrei'' her words were hard to be heard, but he heard them.
''Oscar, you are wake! How do you feel know?'' he held her hand and stroked warmly.
''Where is Rosalie''? Her words were clear now but still weak.
''I send her back to her home, so that she may bring us more news about…''
''Andrei, I really don't know what I am feeling right now, I am not supposed to be angry, neither upset, I have already made my diction, I chose to fight with the people, and he chose to fight by his king, we suppose to be enemies now, we are in different sides in this battle, and now by coughing him, every thing is over, and by no time, he will be behead by Robespierre. Andrei am I so bad because I am cosign my father's death?''.
Her eyes widened as saying that. He didn't answer her. ''Answer me Andrei! Please or I… ''
Her tears flooded again on her cheeks, he knew what he exactly had to do, and he didn't tried to stop them this time, only he did that he embraced her and stroked her hair lightly.
''Shh… It is alright, you don't have anything to feel guilt for, he is still your father, and he loves you, you are his precious daughter, and I swear that we will find away to get him out of Paris''. And he continued on stroking her hair as if by that he could soothe her pain.
God, why everything is agents her? Is this really her fate, her destiny, to suffer like that? Hasn't she suffered enough yet? Oh god please lay your mercy on her, only for once.